Post here and I'll assign you useless shit from SkyMall [Archive]

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 12:43 AM

Yay!

For you, TAL, I present the extended insect vacuum. For all those "hard-to-reach" insects.

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/a5/26/04/69641512x.jpg

The Extended Reach Insect Vacuum.
Pest are suctioned by the 14,000 rpm motor and drawn into a sealed disposable cartridge through a flexible nozzle that reaches windows and corners easily. Lined with a non-toxic gel (harmless to humans and pets), the cartridge traps and quickly kills insects; when the cartridge is full, simply throw it away and insert a new one. With a built-in rechargeable battery. Comes with two disposable cartridges; two 17" extensions for a 54" reach, and wall mount. ABS plastic. 54" L x 4 1/2" Diam. (3 lbs.)

Dr Deaf

11-17-2004, 12:46 AM

airfare would be nice, but i'll take insignificant trinkets as well.

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 12:50 AM

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/ef/26/04/69660547x.jpg

RACK STANDS ON ITS OWN
Durable steel and polymer freestanding rack holds lots of shoes and shoeboxes. Solid and stable, even on thick carpet. Assembles in seconds. White. 50 pair rack 35 3/8"W x 55 1/2"H x 10"D

Sorry cos, it's not that cool but I thought you and steger would need room for part of your awesome wardrobes.

Plus, you can have all those SHOES!

And it's a rack...get it...huh....

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 12:54 AM

Beth

11-17-2004, 12:57 AM

thank you! it's too pretty to rip tho. he can just pull the top down and pull the skirt up. or hide under the skirt. :)

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 12:59 AM

this sounds alright

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/1c/27/04/69672092x.jpg

A New Look to an Old Favorite - The Green Machine!
A group of scientists created 360* of spin out action. Created in the top secret HUFFY Racing Center, scientists built one monster of a new ride!! Starting with dual joysticks for tight steering. A fat front tire for superior traction and extra-wide rear slick tires for all-out power slides. THE GREEN MACHINE. RULE YOUR SIDEWALK. (Additional shipping $5).

Dr Deaf

11-17-2004, 01:00 AM

For beth, cause I'm sure she'd look uber hot in it, but since it's from skymall it's probably cheap as hell and therefore bobby can rip it off.

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/cc/15/06/102091948x.jpg

bethness: i'll trade you one drop of fresh honey for that gown / dress and i'll letcha watch it burn with me. deal?

http://www.healingdaily.com/detoxification-diet/honey.jpg

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 01:01 AM

airfare would be nice, but i'll take insignificant trinkets as well.

I'm not sure, but this shit might just make you be able to see all the way from Canada to Florida.

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/f6/26/04/69662408x.jpg

The First Digital Picture-Taking Spotting Scope.
Our picture-taking spotting scope has a powerful Bushnell lens that adjusts from15X to 45X magnification, and a built-in .35 megapixel camera with fixed 15X magnification. Its 16 MB memory holds up to 300 close-ups ready to down load via the included USB cable to your PC. The 50 mm rubber shell is water-resistant and durable, and has a retractable sunshade. With remote shutter, software, aluminum storage case, soft case, and tripod. 2 3/4" Diam: 11" L. (34 oz.)

cosmo105

11-17-2004, 01:03 AM

Beth

11-17-2004, 01:04 AM

bethness: i'll trade you one drop of fresh honey for that gown / dress and i'll letcha watch it burn with me. deal?

http://www.healingdaily.com/detoxification-diet/honey.jpg

it's a deal, baby. provided you lick the honey off first. the dress can burn while we're smoking after. :)

Dr Deaf

11-17-2004, 01:05 AM

I'm not sure, but this shit might just make you be able to see all the way from Canada to Florida.

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/f6/26/04/69662408x.jpg

The First Digital Picture-Taking Spotting Scope.
Our picture-taking spotting scope has a powerful Bushnell lens that adjusts from15X to 45X magnification, and a built-in .35 megapixel camera with fixed 15X magnification. Its 16 MB memory holds up to 300 close-ups ready to down load via the included USB cable to your PC. The 50 mm rubber shell is water-resistant and durable, and has a retractable sunshade. With remote shutter, software, aluminum storage case, soft case, and tripod. 2 3/4" Diam: 11" L. (34 oz.)

i feel like a pr3vert p33ping tom or something.

i can see all the way to florida right now, it's the taste o' florida i miss the most.

thanks tho. (y)

yeahwho

11-17-2004, 01:19 AM

Hey! Gay me up with that SkyMall stuff! Thanks.

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 01:26 AM

yeahwho, since you live in seattle...

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/1a/27/04/69671455gx1.jpg

Fun Rain Boots - The Most Fun your Feet will Ever Have!
For Kids!
100% waterproof rubber rain boots that are the most fun your feet will ever have! Constructed from natural rubber with full net moisture absorbing cotton lining, deluxe non-slip sole and steel shank. 2T, 3T,4T,4/5,5/6, 6X Please specify, Ladybug, Frog, Bee, Dalmatian, Cow, Pink Kitty, Pink Butterfly, Dino, Red Fire Chief or Yellow Fire Chief

(I personally recommend the "Pink Kitty", it's a surefire ladykilla)

adrockmelanie

11-17-2004, 01:43 AM

me!!

spacemonkey

11-17-2004, 01:44 AM

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/1c/27/04/69672092x.jpg

A New Look to an Old Favorite - The Green Machine!
A group of scientists created 360* of spin out action. Created in the top secret HUFFY Racing Center, scientists built one monster of a new ride!! Starting with dual joysticks for tight steering. A fat front tire for superior traction and extra-wide rear slick tires for all-out power slides. THE GREEN MACHINE. RULE YOUR SIDEWALK. (Additional shipping $5).

that ride is champ! it really took a group of scientists to make it happen.. awesomeness. beats the snot right outta the stuff I've ever ridden when I was knee high to a grasshopper.

thanks DandyFop

yeahwho

11-17-2004, 01:58 AM

Thanks for the booty's! We need 'em up here. xoxoxo (y) http://kinetic.seattle.wa.us/nxtlevel/etcdocs/localdocs/rainymkt.jpg

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 02:19 AM

me!!

For mel, so she can stay entertained on those road trips to see her favorite bands, and also have something to carry her loads of taco bell food. (and so it can slap boys when they are stupid)

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/fb/26/04/69663600x.jpg

The Robosapien Robot.
Our 14"-tall remote controlled robot, designed by a former NASA scientist to be easy to operate, has 67 preprogrammed movements you can quickly command with the included remote. Robosapien walks forward and backward, leans in four directions, and can lift bulky items and pieces of paper alike. Requires four D batteries ad three AAA remote control batteries. Ages 6 and up. (3 1/2 lbs.)

Matt

11-17-2004, 03:54 AM

I want something, but I'm just greedy like that.

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 04:04 AM

Matt:

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/c1/e3/02/48480674x.jpg

The number one cause of fire fatalities is toxic smoke -- not flames.
It may look strange, but this emergency escape hood gives you 15 life-saving minutes to exit the fire area, eyes protected from smoke and soot, and lungs blessedly free from toxic carbon monoxide, and other deadly by-products of fire. That's why smoke hoods have been recommended by such travel safety experts as Ralph Nader. For your safety (and that of your family), travel with the award-winning EVAC-U8 Smoke Hood. Made in Canada. (5" x 2-1/2" diameter, 11 oz.)

Dude, it's recommended by Nader. You can't go wrong.

Matt

11-17-2004, 04:17 AM

I thought you're NOT supposed to put plastic bags over your head.

My parents lied. My life is a sham.

tracky

11-17-2004, 04:59 AM

oooh what do i get?

P of R

11-17-2004, 05:56 AM

Assign me an object, please.

paul jones

11-17-2004, 06:05 AM

post ear

HEIRESS

11-17-2004, 08:44 AM

meeeeeeeeee

Mr. Boomin'Granny

11-17-2004, 09:26 AM

im going on a trip next week. me memmmemememe!

monkey

11-17-2004, 09:38 AM

oooooooo i want one

afronaut

11-17-2004, 10:17 AM

do me kay

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 01:09 PM

oooh what do i get?

so I can drunk dial you properly

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/f9/26/04/69663054x.jpg

VintageCoffee Mill Telephone
A very unusual replica crank phone, this original art deco model was only manufactured in Sweden in the year 1893 under very limited production quantity. With its uniquely designed shape, collectors nick name it as The Biscuit Barrel, or The Coffee Mill. Updated. 11 1/2x 9 1/2".

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 01:15 PM

Assign me an object, please.

Since you've got the Jesus hairdo/facial hair thing going on...

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/f0/26/04/69660772x.jpg

Electronic Holy Bible
Includes the entire text of the Old and New Testaments of both the King James Version and the New International Version(R) Holy Bibles. You can even cross reference the different Bible versions. Built-in electronic concordance finds words and verses instantly. Includes a daily Devotional. Perfect for worship, Bible Study, research and inspiration. Great Holiday gift idea.

little j

11-17-2004, 01:17 PM

Ms. Fop,

I hereby request an object of your choosing to be assigned to myself by yourself.

regards

ms. j

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 01:26 PM

post ear

No need to go to the pub anymore!

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/c5/97/05/93832558x.jpg

Let our revolving Dispenser pour the drinks.
These leakproof dispensers portion out a perfect 1 1/2-oz. shot every time. Constructed of rugged steel and aircraft aluminum. Accepts bottles up to one liter. Assembly required. Sorry, spirits not included. Specify goldtone or chrome finish.
Six-Bottle Dispenser

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 01:30 PM

meeeeeeeeee

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/af/26/04/69644163x.jpg

Whodunit? Forensic Science Lab
Discovery Design
Developed exclusively by Discovery Kids(TM), the Whodunit? Lab features six crime mysteries, each harder to solve than the last. Time to get busy with real science, tricky evidence, mysterious clues and hours of inspired fun. Lab experiments include tire casting, blood analysis, fiber identification, handwriting analysis and ink testing. Complete materials include databases, instructions, samples and more. Requires four AA batteries (not included). Ages 8+.

jesus, blood analysis for little kids? creepy.

alruggs

11-17-2004, 01:42 PM

yesh

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 01:59 PM

im going on a trip next week. me memmmemememe!

So you don't overheeatttttttt when you see cosmo
http://images.skymall.com/images/products/a4/e4/02/48538825gx1.jpg

Be comfortable anywhere, even on the hottest days!
Our lightweight wearable invention houses a patented, miniature evaporative -cooling system. Just fill with a few ounces of water, place around your neck and switch it on: A quiet motor drives a tiny fan that creates the evaporative cooling; flexible aluminum plates cool your neck - and your entire body enjoys hours of relief from the heat! Weighs only 14 oz. filled Runs on one AA battery (not included). Created by Sharper Image Design.
(MED/LG) Personal Cooling System.

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 02:19 PM

oooooooo i want one

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/cd/15/06/102092041x.jpg

"Polly in Paradise"
Create your own colorful, tropical paradise with our "Polly" parrot hanging from her own metal ring and chain. Perfect hung near the pool, patio or sunroom, this life sized designer resin sculpture is fully hand painted in all the colors of the rainbow. A Design Toscano exclusive. 15" W X 5" D X 17 1/2" H. (6 lbs.) Set of 2

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 02:23 PM

do me kay

since you need some help with good luck

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/f4/26/04/69661823x.jpg

The Traditional Christmas Pickle
In Old World Germany, the last decoration placed on the tree Christmas Eve was always a pickle, with the parents hiding it deep in the boughs. The lucky child who found it on Christmas Day was blessed with good fortune and a special gift from St. Nicholas. 1 1/2"L. Imported.

Audielicious

11-17-2004, 02:29 PM

Me, please. :)

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 02:34 PM

hit me (y) i'm always looking for something new to buy

so you can clean up all those pesky joint stubs

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/2a/13/06/101919251x.jpg

Hide Unsightly Cigarette Butts and Reduce Dangerous Fire Risks!
Since many households and businesses do not permit smoking indoors, the Smokers Cease-Fire is the safe and attractive answer to outdoor cigarette butt disposal. It safely collects cigarette butts to keep patios, poolside decks, and entryways clean and protected. The innovative self-extinguishing design limits the flow of oxygen to reduce the risk of fire. Flame-retardant polyethylene stands up to harsh weather conditions -- no rusting, cracking or fading. Tie-down notches allow the base to be secured against severe weather and theft. Galvanized steel liner pail makes it easy to clean and is virtually maintenance-free! Additional shipping $5. Available in: Pewter Gray, Adobe Beige, Terra Cotta, Deco Black, Forest Green.

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 02:40 PM

Ms. Fop,

I hereby request an object of your choosing to be assigned to myself by yourself.

regards

ms. j

So you and seth can proudly display all of his golf ball balancing achievements.

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/25/a7/05/94840108x.jpg

Relive your best golf rounds.
This cherry-finish wood cabinet displays your "hole in one" golf balls or showcases souvenir balls from favorite courses and tournaments. Wood tees hold up to 63 golf balls (not included). Acrylic window. Easy assembly; wall mount. 22"W x 29 1/8"H x 3 3/8"D. Sorry, no air shipment.
Display Cabinet for 63 Golf Balls.

P of R

11-17-2004, 02:45 PM

Since you've got the Jesus hairdo/facial hair thing going on...

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/f0/26/04/69660772x.jpg

Electronic Holy Bible
Includes the entire text of the Old and New Testaments of both the King James Version and the New International Version(R) Holy Bibles. You can even cross reference the different Bible versions. Built-in electronic concordance finds words and verses instantly. Includes a daily Devotional. Perfect for worship, Bible Study, research and inspiration. Great Holiday gift idea.

Hehe!

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 02:47 PM

yesh

So you won't ever have a hard time waking up ;) :D

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/ef/26/04/69660602x.jpg

Clock Watching Has Never Been More Fun!
If you aren't into speed, you won't get why car-crazies go, well, crazy for these clocks. Drilled, vented rotors with 4-pot calipers... ah, the stuff of dreams!
Disc Brake Desk/Alarm Clock, 4 1/2" tall; has metal suspension with coil-over racing shocks, working steering... the disc even spins.

Lindsey_1535

11-17-2004, 02:50 PM

my turn please

DandyFop

11-17-2004, 02:58 PM

Me, please. :)

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/ed/26/04/69660086x.jpg

Disney Princess Dress-Up Trunk is Filled With Beautiful Gowns to turn 4 friends into Belle, Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella and Snow White! All satin poly in blues, yellow and pinks. 24-piece wardrobe has: hair accessories, jewelry and non-skid slides. Board trunk is 14x9x6" H. Hours of imaginative play for ages 3 and up.

Audielicious

11-17-2004, 03:05 PM

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/ed/26/04/69660086x.jpg

Disney Princess Dress-Up Trunk is Filled With Beautiful Gowns to turn 4 friends into Belle, Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella and Snow White! All satin poly in blues, yellow and pinks. 24-piece wardrobe has: hair accessories, jewelry and non-skid slides. Board trunk is 14x9x6" H. Hours of imaginative play for ages 3 and up.
Awesome! The second little girl is adorable (I'm going to assume they're included). Instant kids! THANKS, DANDY!

tracky

11-17-2004, 03:24 PM

so I can drunk dial you properly

haha nice. have you actually tried to call me b4? :D

Paul Kemp

11-17-2004, 03:27 PM

ME!

adrockmelanie

11-17-2004, 04:04 PM

For mel, so she can stay entertained on those road trips to see her favorite bands, and also have something to carry her loads of taco bell food. (and so it can slap boys when they are stupid)

omfg, barb, i love it.... plus, your reason for giving it to me: roadtrips + bands + shows + taco bell + stupid boys.... they're all basically what = my life.

hahhaha i love you.

Waus

11-17-2004, 09:30 PM

Curiouser and Curiouser...what'll you give me?

paul jones

11-18-2004, 01:50 AM

No need to go to the pub anymore!

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/c5/97/05/93832558x.jpg

Let our revolving Dispenser pour the drinks.
These leakproof dispensers portion out a perfect 1 1/2-oz. shot every time. Constructed of rugged steel and aircraft aluminum. Accepts bottles up to one liter. Assembly required. Sorry, spirits not included. Specify goldtone or chrome finish.
Six-Bottle Dispenser
fucking amazing! thanks! (y) :D

cosmo105

11-18-2004, 01:54 AM

you know, i get the chance to read a lot of skymall. and i've seriously seen every single one of these items. i find this hilarious (y)

DandyFop

11-18-2004, 02:13 AM

my turn please

Lindsey...for whenever you'd rather let your earrings do the talking...

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/d4/12/06/101897270x.jpg

An Ear Full
Talk to the hand, 'cause the ears don't wanna hear it! On those days when you've gotten an earful, these earrings make your statement for you. Made of sterling silver accented with colored glass beads.

DandyFop

11-18-2004, 02:23 AM

ME!

Non-erection-looking pants. Oh and yeah they keep bugs off ya.

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/bb/26/04/69647278x.jpg

Protect the whole family from mosquitoes, ticks and UV rays.
BUZZ OFF Insect Shield Insect Repellant Apparel by Ex Officio is the only insect repellant clothing registered by the EPA. BUZZ OFF apparel gives you the protection of insect repellent spray without having to keep reapplying oily chemicals to your skin. And along with repelling mosquitoes and ticks, BUZZ OFF clothing repels the sun by providing 30+ UV protection. He's wearing an Ex Officio BUZZ OFF cape hat, Baja shirt, convertible pants and socks. The socks also repel bugs and wick moisture. Regular Length Pants (S-XXL; Khaki)

DandyFop

11-18-2004, 02:32 AM

Curiouser and Curiouser...what'll you give me?

nobody looks cooler than when they are wearing these..

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/93/c9/13210410x.jpg

Comfortable EarPops protect your ears from the cold & wind.
Each EarPop slides snugly right over your ear... it's more comfortable than standard ear muffs, since there's no annoying headband, and no need for a hat that messes your hair! For men and women. Made of warm PolarFleece from Malden Mills. USA. Please specify Small (1 1/2" to 2 1/4", measuring from the top to the bottom of your ear), Medium (2 1/4" to 2 3/4") or Large (2 3/4" to 3"); and also specify black, brown, gray, red, navy, hunter or royal blue or leopard.

alruggs

11-18-2004, 08:35 PM

So you won't ever have a hard time waking up ;) :D

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/ef/26/04/69660602x.jpg

Clock Watching Has Never Been More Fun!
If you aren't into speed, you won't get why car-crazies go, well, crazy for these clocks. Drilled, vented rotors with 4-pot calipers... ah, the stuff of dreams!
Disc Brake Desk/Alarm Clock, 4 1/2" tall; has metal suspension with coil-over racing shocks, working steering... the disc even spins.

that couldn't have been more perfect for me

RockabillyGrrl

11-18-2004, 08:37 PM

Oh, I'd like something! :)

jabumbo

11-18-2004, 08:55 PM

i need more useless shit!

DandyFop

11-19-2004, 03:46 AM

Oh, I'd like something! :)

Rockabilly, this is to keep those pesky bugs from harming that perty face.

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/d7/14/06/102029182x.jpg

Stop Pesky Mosquitoes And Flies
The Bug Cap packs a mesh hood in a compact pouch above its sun blocking bill. When black flies, no-see-ums, or mosquitoes decide to dine, pull on the hood to protect face and neck without chemicals. Adjustable elastic cords hold the net tightly on your shoulders. Mesh allows excellent visibility and ventilation. Adjustable size strap. SPECIFY GREEN or BEIGE. Canada.

(pss - okay, really I just did a search for stuff with the word "Canada" since that's where you are from...apparently they just decided to put the word Canada at the end of their description...not "made in Canada, even)

DandyFop

11-19-2004, 03:50 AM

i need more useless shit!

OMG - these might be my favorite things yet

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/d3/15/06/102093701x.jpg

Inspirational Shower Cards
Cleansing Thoughts
We already know about the renewing, purifying power of water. These soulful accessories complete the bath or shower as a healing ritual. Waterproof inspirational cards attach to your shower wall, ready to read morning when your mind is most open and receptive to positive thoughts. Kit includes 5 laminated affirmation cards, removable wall attachment, a natural bath-oil bead and direction, all tucked in a shimmer sheer drawstring bag. Mad in the USA.

jabumbo

11-19-2004, 02:53 PM

OMG - these might be my favorite things yet

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/d3/15/06/102093701x.jpg

Inspirational Shower Cards
Cleansing Thoughts
We already know about the renewing, purifying power of water. These soulful accessories complete the bath or shower as a healing ritual. Waterproof inspirational cards attach to your shower wall, ready to read morning when your mind is most open and receptive to positive thoughts. Kit includes 5 laminated affirmation cards, removable wall attachment, a natural bath-oil bead and direction, all tucked in a shimmer sheer drawstring bag. Mad in the USA.

thats awesome. (y)

now only if i had a working shower

lil richard

11-20-2004, 01:05 AM

And you'll only have it if the prrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiccccee is right!http://www.twodolla.org/old/CBS%20Daytime%20%20The%20Price%20Is%20Right.jpg

RockabillyGrrl

11-21-2004, 05:30 PM

Rockabilly, this is to keep those pesky bugs from harming that perty face.

http://images.skymall.com/images/products/d7/14/06/102029182x.jpg

Hahaha Thanks :)

mp-seventythree

11-21-2004, 05:39 PM