BBMB Limericks/Poems

[Knuckles]

I'll start



I once knew a young man named Auton
Who’s underwear were not made of cotton
They were polyester
His crotch it did fester
And smells now of potatoes au gratin

[Rancid_Beasties]

There was once a man name knuckles
Who refused to wear belt-buckles
He'd just use old rope
His pants could not cope
Now everyone's seen his love muscle

[TonsOfFun]

There once was a guy call rancid_beasties
he paid to eat feces
the habit took him places that made red faces
the faces were mad
espeicailly his dad, who became really sad

...I can't do this....

[avignon]

There is a cute guy named synch
Today I told him I stink
He said "What the hell?
You just have a smell
And that's not the same, I think."

[synch]

And smells now of potatoes au gratin
I had to read it three times to figure out how you pronounced it to make it rhyme :D

[synch]

There is a cute guy named synch
Today I told him I stink
He said "What the hell?
You just have a smell
And that's not the same, I think."
:D

True story that.

[Rancid_Beasties]

There once was a guy call rancid_beasties
he paid to eat feces
the habit took him places that made red faces
the faces were mad
espeicailly his dad, who became really sad

...I can't do this....
Poor (n)

Seriously man...a limerick is like the easiest thing ever, you just have to find two words that rhymes with the persons name, and any two other words that rhyme with each other and have some relevance to the first two lines. I mean you were doing ok up until "the faces were mad".... :p You shoulda said "and now hes banned from our species" or something.

[TonsOfFun]

Yeah, it wasn't good. Sorry. I just took the next name and started. But then I couldn't get past you eating feces cus your name rhymes like that.

It ain't easy for me damint!

[Bitchamachacha]

There once was a guy named Chewy
He hung in Cali with Huey, Duey and Luey
They tickled him with their feathers
They became best friends forever
And Uncle Donald got jealous and said "Oh Phewy!"

[Elusive]

once there was bitchamachacha
with a wig made of angel hair pasta
spaghetti shampoo
a favorite to use
she chews on her hair and drinks shasta

[paul jones]

there was a man called Turdbergler
who drove around town in a sherpa
every day he would say
'Thank God I'm Gay!'
then pick up cruising surfers



hmmm,that was a bit of a poor effort

[Kid Presentable]

There once was a girlie named sak,
loathed the song 'baby got back'
said purely in fun,
like KRS One,
"This board is wick-wick-wack.".

[Kid Presentable]

There once lived a lady named Nuzz,
Kicked like a hella good buzz,
Is shown disrespect,
for her intellect,
And still says "What's the fuzz?".

[Kid Presentable]

I'll send this to chiflada,
nobody's posts hit harder,
That's with an "Oi! You!"
or a :mad: or two,
she keeps ZOunt stashed in a larder.

[ToucanSpam]

Once upon a time lived the Tzar,
His voice couldn't carry so far,
So he started to cuss
and he kicked up a fuss
and become the next Turd from afar.


Maybe some more....

[Tzar]

i'm going to become turd :confused:
well i did ask him for advice on biking, and i do masturbate a lot.

[Kid Presentable]

I knew this dude named Toucan,
His survival he surely was flukin'
At least half would jest,
but heed the rest,
most his posts leave me close to pukin'.

[ToucanSpam]

i'm going to become turd :confused:
well i did ask him for advice on biking, and i do masturbate a lot.
The difference between you and Turd is that you're less of an asshole.

Hey, be thankful someone made a limerick about you fool!! :D

[Tzar]

The difference between you and Turd is that you're less of an asshole.

Hey, be thankful someone made a limerick about you fool!! :D
and i am. (y)

[bigblu89]

There's a guy I know named G-Mile
Whose words make everyone smile
He posts lots of pics
and is good with the chicks
Becasue he's the Doctor of Style

[Tzar]

there once was a guy called norcen
who had a pencil called jimmy.
an..FUCK!

*runs out of thread in humiliation*

[Kid Presentable]

Get this kid a guitar,
That's why they cal him Tzar.
He's too rock n roll,
for all us assholes,
If he left he'll turn up at a bar.

[ToucanSpam]

There once lived a woman named Lindsey,
Her posts were crazy and whimsy,
Then she stole my heart
Don't like to be apart
But she makes my limbs go flimsy.


I know that sucked. :o

[Tzar]

dude, you love her so bad! you need take a motherfucking road trip to that ass, you dig?

mang, she was fucking wasted tonight, it's one thing to talk to a drunk on msn, but to talk to a DRUNK LINDSEY on msn.....

[beastieangel01]

awwww

[cosmo105]

i texted this to a few people a while back...


Beastie Boys they had a board
L-O-L-O-L
and on that board they had a noob
L-O-L-O-L
with a ROFLMAO here and a STFU there
here a A/S/L? there a PWNED!!1
everywhere an OMGWTFBBQZ0RZ!!!

Beastie Boys they had a board

L-O-L-O-L!

[g-mile7]

Mirror, Mirror…. (2-22-05)

Verse 1:

Mirror, mirror what is my state of mind in glass/
Falling pass waste lands of shine of sands/
I demand you speak on why she doesn’t think/
That we as one could be the missing link/
To ink cashmere dreams the letter of her life/
Is so tight as her light’s better in my night/
Might this be false paths, she hath drawn for me/
Like deep steps in sands gone in seas/
She washed me with dawn that was electric/
Respected in the valley of my heart was her message/
To address our hopes so she then concurs/
But words are too weak to speak deep as verbs/
Can’t reach her soul so I shutter with fears/
Near the streets I sleep in the gutter of tears/
It appears she doesn’t care bout me clearer/
Tears dry inside eyes of the man in the mirror/

Hook:

How do you feel? About/
About Me/
How do you? /
How do you feel? About/
About Me/
Do you care? Do you care? /
About/


Verse 2:

Mirror what did I do wrong come too strong or weak/
What is the portal for these songs to breech/
These fortresses the precious will use/
I’m too dumb to realize I’m reckless my cool/
Is fueled by wishing stars far out of reach not sight/
Like the girl I yearn for beneath star light/
I assumed we’d be tight with so much in common/
But the options ends our trust, I’m sobbing/
Mirror, mirror I’m calling out what’s this about, this pain? /
That stains the soul’s windows that mounts with rain/
My dame oust the flame made in her silhouette/
As better times have dried staining my pillow wet/
When we met, mirror, she was digging the message/
Her presence was lifted but the soul let it/
Be poetic as my heart’s mistress did not see/
What this mirror spoke profound, what she is to me/

Hook

Verse 3:

My thoughts are suicide notes I wrote for despair/
Is there any hope for life is not fair/
I dare have spoken these death threats/
Against the figure in my mirror who wept sweat/
I guess it was all lies all the times she said hi/
Fed lies of the dark side like a Jedi/
Red eyes burn with embers as I remember her face/
Her shape, why did she change it hurts me great/
This state can’t be her how could she flip a switch/
And change for the worst so awfully quick/
She plead the fifth to evidence that lies/
On sites where her pictures reside/
To drive, the shadows to unravel stealth flights/
My main drag knowing she holding someone else tight/
So mirror my listener to blues I can’t atone/
She’s the one always lonely but I’m the one always alone/





http://www.soundclick.com/dainfamousgreenemile (Mirror) 2 those who've never heard my voice (least rap voice)

[g-mile7]

There's a guy I know named G-Mile
Whose words make everyone smile
He posts lots of pics
and is good with the chicks
Becasue he's the Doctor of Style


thanx fam!!much respect (y) (y)

[BionicEye]

There once was a girl named Zippo
And her posts are sometimes like Hippos
With the wide angle pokes
Some smooth as bong tokes
My balls in there, yes, I would dipp-o



que bolludo

[BionicEye]

Then there's that Zorra Chiflada
For feet she's got two empanadas
And though she's an Aussie
She's not at all mossy
'Cause she wants to wed Eric Estrada

[roosta]

there was a young girl called clo
nice, but a little bit slow
she couldn't pick what name to use
that roosta would not abuse
the answer she just did not know

[DandyFop]

One day there came the girl Skye
Many thought she was actually a guy
Or maybe she's Ashley
She denied it abashedly
And now we all wish she'd just die

[BionicEye]

Sho' yo' love for that Bitchamachacha
For her dancing up 'la cucaracha'
and that ill video post
I sweat that one most
Next time just flash some 'bombacha'

[Knuckles]

There once was a young girl named Coz
Her work rulebook had a strange clause
It was about the length of one’s hair
She said “Oh no, how unfair!!!”
Now she has hair like the BOZ (http://www.beastieboys.com/bbs/showpost.php?p=974490&postcount=1345)

[cosmo105]

knuckles you son of a.

[g-mile7]

There once was a young girl named Coz
Her work rulebook had a strange clause
It was about the length of one’s hair
She said “Oh no, how unfair!!!”
Now she has hair like the BOZ (http://www.beastieboys.com/bbs/showpost.php?p=974490&postcount=1345)


wow thats shit right there, glad to have you back knux'

[Elusive]

theres a crazy dude named elusive mcskills
he used to do paper, eat various pills
he brain is all screwed,
twisted askew,
but still he dont care
he just chills

hard to catch thats what he's been dubbed...
he falls for no traps and he kills any love
for people all need
on all levels of greed
he drinks up horse feed at the pub

the pub or the bar,
a dreary old place....
you can see a slight sorrow
in that young womans face
there just to talk
with nothing to say....
just getting by,
you know the wrong way.

yea i'm in a shit mood.

[DipDipDive]

There's this guy on the web named mickill
He thinks he's so def and so ill
He's really a tool
Always acting a fool
And his evil will make your blood chill

[DipDipDive]

Much love to the girl named Heiress
On the bbmb, she's one of the fairest
She has dark curly hair
She makes all the boys stare
By her goofy faces, she's never embarassed

;)

[paul jones]

there's a man on the board they called








i can't i'm too stoned

[BionicEye]

Then there's that stoner Paul Jones
Burning trees like he's poppin 'No Doze'
A smoker I did not think of he
But he squirts of pot-tainted pee



Ehhh I'm too stoned to finish this one....






btw PJ, is your name a reference to the Zep bassist?

[erbngirl]

There once was a man named TAL
It's been rumored he's really digital.
He never sleeps
But secrets he keeps
And he's always everyone's pal.

[zippo]

ill come here to tell you
about a young lad
his name is bionic
im sure you have had
the pleasure to meet him
as i have this year
and so many minutes
weve spent right in here

its too late at night
for me to be active
in threads just like these
that demand to get hectic
cuz people go crazy
and open their minds
and seem to post anything
just to get here, inside

right there for example
ive wrote some more bull-shit
but its o-k im off
i wont be the culprit
of sending the rest of this
thread right to hell
im off
good night
please bid me farewell

que boluda

[DandyFop]

Here is a man named Knuckles
he always gives me the chuckles
He told of a dream
In which he did cream
because he got to give me the fuckles

[DandyFop]

A young girl named DipDipDive
knew her hookering would thrive
if she'd just get a penis
it's a secret between us
Now she charges 35

[DandyFop]

There's an old man named MicKill
Whom a void he does fill
In the bum of young boys
and sometimes with toys
You can find him by the Olde Mill

[BionicEye]

awww... when that I saw
it made me go "p'shawww"

[DandyFop]

There is a cute boy named jabumbo
He reminds me a little of Dumbo
With his big floppy ears
and eyes full of tears
He solves mysteries just like Calumbo

[CrankItUp!]

I Is Wild - Honey Child! (y)

[paul jones]

Then there's that stoner Paul Jones
Burning trees like he's poppin 'No Doze'
A smoker I did not think of he
But he squirts of pot-tainted pee



Ehhh I'm too stoned to finish this one....






btw PJ, is your name a reference to the Zep bassist?


no the original lead singer of Manfred Mann

[paul jones]

there was a



nah too driunk

[Bob]

there was a



nah too driunk

brilliant

[DandyFop]

hey youre the one who pm'ed me psycho..... with your Echewta is so hot crap, we have something in common now bullshit.....
and I laughed and ran away disagreeing with you.
Dumbass, suck off already he doesnt want you, get over it.

omg

it is him!

and actually i wasn't really feeling that limerick but I couldn't come up with anything better

[ToucanSpam]

Did DandyFop get a limerick?

[DipDipDive]

hehehehe fuckles :o