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View Full Version : i almost killed a toddler today

TurdBerglar
10-05-2005, 06:21 PM
i was at work and i was lifting up this case of mazola corn oil. now these cases have like 6 containers of these big ass bottles in them. as i lifting it up the bottom drops out and i do this crazy twist squat manuver to catch the bottom of the case with my knee. i saved the case but during my sweet manuver my arm flailed out and knocked the shelf. this in turn rattled some other rather large glass bottles of olive oil and one fell off the shelf and knocked this kid sqaure in the fuckn' head. so the kid is sitting in the carriage looking at me with this crazy cross eyed look on his face. then he looks at the mom then back at me then back at the mom and so one. meanwhile the mother is completely oblivious reading the back of some package of fuckn' crutons. then the kid gives me one last look and he fuckn' starts cracking up. laughing his ass off. this gets the attention of the mother and she turns to the kid then looks at me and goes, "is he a funny man? is he a funny man? why is he such a funny man?", with the extremely annoying baby talk voice. and everytime we would walk past eachother till she left she would go,"theeeerrrreeee's the funny man!". that kid's a trooper.
ToucanSpam
10-05-2005, 06:22 PM
Did you feel bad when you hit the kid?
Auton
10-05-2005, 06:23 PM
ahahahaha. awesome (y)
Lindsey_1535
10-05-2005, 06:25 PM
HAHAHA baby talk is funny shit.
ToucanSpam
10-05-2005, 06:25 PM
HAHAHA baby talk is funny shit.
I'm surprised you understand it. :mad:
jabumbo
10-05-2005, 06:27 PM
i dont think i understand the context of this story :confused:
Lindsey_1535
10-05-2005, 06:28 PM
Your mean. F off :(
ToucanSpam
10-05-2005, 06:28 PM
Your mean. F off :(
Gonna cry now? :mad:
TurdBerglar
10-05-2005, 06:29 PM
i dont think i understand the context of this story :confused:

it's about babies and corn oil
Lindsey_1535
10-05-2005, 06:29 PM
baby oil
TurdBerglar
10-05-2005, 06:31 PM
i like the phillipino variety of baby oil.
Lindsey_1535
10-05-2005, 06:32 PM
Whats the differnence? Is it the same as like Johnsons and Johnsons?
TurdBerglar
10-05-2005, 06:35 PM
Whats the differnence? Is it the same as like Johnsons and Johnsons?

phillipinos add this great and wonderful full taste to chicken
jackrock
10-05-2005, 06:51 PM
funny story, "funny man"!! :D
Tzar
10-05-2005, 07:24 PM
"i got something to say,
i killed a baby today,
doesn't matter much to me,
as long as it's dead"
miss_bhaven
10-05-2005, 07:32 PM
Awwww hehehe poor lil' kid :p
miss_bhaven
10-05-2005, 07:33 PM
"i got something to say,
i killed a baby today,
doesn't matter much to me,
as long as it's dead"

Matthew!! :mad: I hate that song :(
Tzar
10-05-2005, 07:36 PM
Matthew!! :mad: I hate that song :(
:D
i'm just playin'
ToucanSpam
10-05-2005, 07:37 PM
What's red and silver and hangs from a wall?
Tzar
10-05-2005, 07:40 PM
What's red and silver and hangs from a wall?
you.
cause i will kill you and hang you on the wall *original-texas-chainsaw-massacre-styles* and the red will be your blood, and the silver will be the axe in your face.

werd.
Lindsey_1535
10-05-2005, 07:41 PM
you.
cause i will kill you and hang you on the wall *original-texas-chainsaw-massacre-styles* and the red will be your blood, and the silver will be the axe in your face.

werd.
I was thinking along the same lines here.
ToucanSpam
10-05-2005, 07:43 PM
owch Tzar
Lowjams
10-05-2005, 10:15 PM
Heh Heh!
zorra_chiflada
10-05-2005, 10:17 PM
why don't you come over here and kill some toddlers in supermarkets? :mad:
TurdBerglar
10-05-2005, 10:18 PM
only if you take out the old fuckers
zorra_chiflada
10-05-2005, 10:19 PM
only if you take out the old fuckers

haha when i was about 8 i ran into this old lady with a trolley and i think i might have done some damage. she probably needed a hip replacement
TurdBerglar
10-05-2005, 10:20 PM
why the fuck did the conducter let you drive the trolley
zorra_chiflada
10-05-2005, 10:26 PM
why the fuck did the conducter let you drive the trolley

we don't have conductors. anyone's allowed to drive a trolley round these parts
Lowjams
10-05-2005, 10:26 PM
Were I work I know this real cranky old basterd. He comes in and yells at people and shit. Makes me like kids better.
TurdBerglar
10-05-2005, 10:28 PM
we don't have conductors. anyone's allowed to drive a trolley round these parts


did you blow the wistle?