Things that aren't that funny or clever: An update

[mickill]

I've probably made a thread like this before, but I don't care. This is important. I'm sure I'm not the only one forced to roll his eyes after every second post I read. Anyway, redundant, stock, typical, predictable humor. You can't all be comedians, but seriously...

When you people go "I read the thread title as....". That's just lame. The thread title could be something like, "I'm going to Virginia next week" and some hack will come along and be like, "I totally read that as "I'm groping a virgin as we speak". Har har har.

When people change quotes. Ugh. Making up a quote and putting someone's name to it can be hit or miss, but changing an actual quote and replacing certain words to be all hee hee.....yeah, hilarious.

Making some sarcastic remark and following it with "!!!!!1111". Okay already. This was never really humorous or clever to begin with. But now it's just plain annoying.

If this offends you, good.

[Kid Presentable]

If this offends you, good.

Not offended. Needs work.

[Echewta]

On the train, where I sit quietly and read about important and delightful things, there was a guy next to me praying, a lady across from me talking loudly on the cell phone and the guy to my diagonal chewing gum with his mouth wide open. :( It wasn't funny nor is this post clever. I'm just saying...

[Qdrop]

i was gonna respond to Mickill's post by including ALL of those things in the response...

then i realized that i was entirely too lazy to do so.



and that it would pathetically predictable.



but mostly because i'm too lazy.

[Kid Presentable]

Mickill's right. At least he's using his status for the forces of good.

Do you think he's like Captain Planet, and five posters combine their powers to conjure him?

l33t!
w00t1
spam!
words!
art!

GO MICKILL!

Captain Mickill, he's our hero.
Taking tolerance down to zero,
He's our keyboards, magnified.
Ah fuck it WESTSIIIIIDE!!!!!!

[BionicEye]

i was gonna respond to Mickill's post by including ALL of those things in the response...

then i realized that i was entirely too lazy to do so.

and that it would pathetically predictable.

but mostly because i'm too lazy.



you're still gay

[cosmo105]

the other night we went to see the new Wallace & Gromit film. when we got out of the theater there was a guy running in a really strange way - he was more leaping than running. bounding, if you will. anyway, of course, i made fun of him and did the same thing. and this huge dweeby dude across from us said, "it must be a leap year." it was as if everything stopped and everyone turned and stared at him.

the whole night i kept wanting to go back and punch him in the face. it made me so angry how bad that was. it wasn't even so bad it was funny. leap year. fucking christ.

[Lex Diamonds]

I've probably made a thread like this before, but I don't care. This is important. I'm sure I'm not the only one forced to roll his eyes after every second post I read. Anyway, redundant, stock, typical, predictable humor. You can't all be comedians, but seriously...

When you people go "I read the thread title as....". That's just lame. The thread title could be something like, "I'm going to Virginia next week" and some hack will come along and be like, "I totally read that as "I'm groping a virgin as we speak". Har har har.

When people change quotes. Ugh. Making up a quote and putting someone's name to it can be hit or miss, but changing an actual quote and replacing certain words to be all hee hee.....yeah, hilarious.

Making some sarcastic remark and following it with "!!!!!1111". Okay already. This was never really humorous or clever to begin with. But now it's just plain annoying.
Hey man, you forgot BionicEye.

[BionicEye]

that was cleverly implied

[ToucanSpam]

Mickill's right. At least he's using his status for the forces of good.

Do you think he's like Captain Planet, and five posters combine their powers to conjure him?

l33t!
w00t1
spam!
words!
art!

GO MICKILL!

Captain Mickill, he's our hero.
Taking tolerance down to zero,
He's our keyboards, magnified.
Ah fuck it WESTSIIIIIDE!!!!!!
that was the best thing you ever posted.

[jabumbo]

is it a leap year? i can never remember

[Lex Diamonds]

that was cleverly implied
Yep. Unlike you I'm clever and funny. (y)

[Bob]

is it a leap year? i can never remember

no, i think leap years are multiples of 4

[mickill]

Another one:

ahem. posting other people's pictures in an exhausted attempt to insult somebody is what we in the know refer to as 'Doing A RobMoney', and it's not a good or funny thing.

[beastieangel01]

your face offends me :mad:

[cosmo105]

let us all agree to never use the term "Doing a RobMoney" ever, ever, ever again. ever.

[Lex Diamonds]

let us all agree to never use the term "Doing a RobMoney" ever, ever, ever again. ever.
Stop Doing a Mickill.

[cosmo105]

NEVER!

[mickill]

Oh boo-hoo! Let's all give mckill a bottle and then change his diapers!

Yeah, you're just not funny, period. I think you'd have a better chance of growing an actual penis and flying than being the least bit interesting to someone other than yourself, come to think of it.

[mickill]

let us all agree to never use the term "Doing a RobMoney" ever, ever, ever again. ever.
That's not what I meant A-HOLE!

[cosmo105]

whatever, man. whatever. just go back to your ass-slapping, buzz-cut grabbing homoverse.

[ToucanSpam]

I wasn't trying to be funny. I was serious. I do need a penis, got any?
go fish

[Lex Diamonds]

Why, where ya been sticking it?

[The Notorious LOL]

I always post high quality USDA Grade A threads and them shits go platinum in a day.

[Kid Presentable]

I always post high quality USDA Grade A threads and them shits go platinum in a day.

Your posts fuck my posts up.

[mickill]

I always post high quality USDA Grade A threads and them shits go platinum in a day.
Yeah, but on some real talk, you done sold out, starting threads on serious shit like Hurricane Katrina. That ain't hood, son. That ain't hood.

[Kid Presentable]

One thing: when I was quoted previously in this thread, was that implying agreeance with my point, or that I'm not clever nor funny by pointing out the foibles of others?

[cosmo105]

i miss posting as tnlol. password still the same?

[roosta]

haha, i remember the last time you did this, it started a minor shit storm in a teacup. i think teh took offence. speaking of which, where he been at?

[mickill]

One thing: when I was quoted previously in this thread, was that implying agreeance with my point, or that I'm not clever nor funny by pointing out the foibles of others?
I was agreeing. cosmo, the little puke, misconstrued my point and tried to hurt our feelings. I hate that bitch so much sometimes.

[Kid Presentable]

I was agreeing. cosmo, the little puke, misconstrued my point and tried to hurt our feelings. I hate that bitch so much sometimes.

She wants to do a RobMoney. Ha, Mae did one, and now she's gone!

[cosmo105]

what the fuck ever. i was just saying that "doing a robmoney" sounds like a really gross sexual act and i'd rather not hear it again. god. i fucking hate you guys.

[mickill]

DON'T COPY ME! DON'T COPY ME! I SAID I HATED YOU FIRST! I HATE YOU...WAIT, NO, I ADORE YOU! COME BACK!

haha, i remember the last time you did this, it started a minor shit storm in a teacup. i think teh took offence. speaking of which, where he been at?
Yeah, it's like these fools don't appreciate the direction I try to give them. I mean, wtf?

Teh's doing the school thing, I suppose. Maybe he's got a girlfriend. The possibilities are rather endless, really. I mean, it's Teh.

[cosmo105]

justify my love, mike. justify it.

[Nuzzolese]

the other night we went to see the new Wallace & Gromit film. when we got out of the theater there was a guy running in a really strange way - he was more leaping than running. bounding, if you will. anyway, of course, i made fun of him and did the same thing. and this huge dweeby dude across from us said, "it must be a leap year." it was as if everything stopped and everyone turned and stared at him.

the whole night i kept wanting to go back and punch him in the face. it made me so angry how bad that was. it wasn't even so bad it was funny. leap year. fucking christ.

I must be dweeby because I thought that was kind of funny. And why were you making fun of him and mimicking it? If a guy wants to run funny he should run funny and get respect for it. You see guys running normally all the time, just that brisk repetitive, hips facing front, left foot right foot evenly paced jog run thing with the sweat flicking off their pecs or maybe they're just doing a little jockish jog to the mail box with their shoulders hunched and their reef sandals barely skimming the pavement and it's like snoresville, pop me and that other guy. I would love to see someone running funny.

[ToucanSpam]

Teh has likely moved on to bigger and better things.


Remember I hated all of you before you all hated eachother, therefore making me cooler because it's cool to hate people now.

...does that even make sense? Do I ever? Fuck, this paper on Children's Literature before 1860 is never getting done.

[cosmo105]

it was a hell of a run. you couldn't watch it and NOT imitate it. seriously. it wasn't even a human run. it was more of a pixie leaping from tulip to tulip run.

[ToucanSpam]

it was more of a pixie leaping from tulip to tulip run.

Fern Gully?

[Nuzzolese]

it was a hell of a run. you couldn't watch it and NOT imitate it. seriously. it wasn't even a human run. it was more of a pixie leaping from tulip to tulip run.

As long as you enjoyed yourself then, that's all that matters. What's Wallace and Grommet?

[Bob]

i run like mick jagger

[mickill]

As long as you enjoyed yourself then, that's all that matters. What's Wallace and Grommet?
It's the sequel to Braveheart. Mel Gibson's William Wallace character cheats death and inherits a claymation dog. It's pretty out there. It was a direct to video release. Kinda different, but funny (y)

[mickill]

Sucked? I thought it deserved a 5 out of a possible 10, AT LEAST.

[ToucanSpam]

Every man dies, but not every man lives.

[DipDipDive]

Sometimes I sneeze all over my monitor and I mistake some of Toucan's words for others and think he might actually be funny for a second because the snot obscures the text on the screen. Then I grab the windex and some paper towels and wipe that shit down and realize that he still sucks.

[ToucanSpam]

At least I won't die alone.

[mickill]

Sometimes I sneeze all over my monitor and I mistake some of Toucan's words for others and think he might actually be funny for a second because the snot obscures the text on the screen. Then I grab the windex and some paper towels and wipe that shit down and realize that he still sucks.
I've lowered my standards for him. My standards for the board in general weren't even very high to begin with. But somehow...somehow...

I don't know. Maybe his posts should be accompanied by a handicap decal. So people will cut him some slack.

[DipDipDive]

I've lowered my standards for him. My standards for the board in general weren't even very high to begin with. But somehow...somehow...

Let's face it, Mike. You have a kinder soul than I.

[mickill]

Let's face it, Mike. You have a kinder soul than I.
You take that back. That was uncalled for.

[ToucanSpam]

You can both eat shit and die horrifying, painful deaths.

[mickill]

sorry (http://www-unix.oit.umass.edu/~gilmac/assets/Gilbert%20McCauley/Crying.jpg)

[ToucanSpam]

sorry (http://www-unix.oit.umass.edu/~gilmac/assets/Gilbert%20McCauley/Crying.jpg)
hahaha is that you consoling me?

[roosta]

deja vu!

[mickill]

Yes.

[ToucanSpam]

Sometimes a good cry is what a man needs.

[mickill]

Sometimes it's also what you need.

[roosta]

obviously not real men

[Qdrop]

At least I won't die alone.

ohh...

tore her up with just one line.



it's sad, cause virtually anyone can slice her with that line...she has no defense for it.

[mickill]

Why would she die alone?

[Freebasser]

B.O.?

[DipDipDive]

ohh...

tore her up with just one line.



it's sad, cause virtually anyone can slice her with that line...she has no defense for it.

I don't get it.

[DipDipDive]

B.O.?

Wait, now I do... :(

[Freebasser]

Someone had to tell you that you smell like a fucking farmyard :(

[ToucanSpam]

I shouldn't talk, I don't even know what a woman is.

[DipDipDive]

Someone had to tell you that you smell like a fucking farmyard :(

I sure wish QDrop would've just come out and said it instead of being a passive aggressive little girl. :(

[Kid Presentable]

What's not funny to me is trying to moonlight as a BG poster, and I fucking try man. You guys should go over to that forum and look at my 'Get it Together' thread, for something to do.

There, that's what's not clever or funny.

[Freebasser]

I sure wish QDrop would've just come out and said it instead of being a passive aggressive little girl. :(

Now now, what did Qdrop ever do to you?

[ToucanSpam]

QDrop touched me very inappropriately at church this past Sunday.

[Qdrop]

I don't get it.

i know.

that's why you'll die alone.


sigh...
do i have to explain everything to you!?

DO I?!!?

[Bob]

i know.

that's why you'll die alone.


sigh...
do i have to explain everything to you!?

DO I?!!?

no, freebasser already told her about her BO

[Qdrop]

I sure wish QDrop would've just come out and said it instead of being a passive aggressive little girl. :(

yeah.
me too.

[Freebasser]

You can't spell Bob without BO

[ToucanSpam]

You can't spell Freebasser without ass. Or Free.

[Bob]

You can't spell Bob without BO

i know, i learned that in first grade

[mickill]

DipDipShit is smart, funny, into sports, independent, dresses nicely and she's pretty damn fine too. What guy wouldn't be interested? Granted, I personally wouldn't even give that bitch the time of day, but y'all have lower standards than me.

[DipDipDive]

i know.

that's why you'll die alone.


sigh...
do i have to explain everything to you!?

DO I?!!?

I'll never be alone as long as I have enchiladas. And speaking of needing to have everything explained to me, why are enchiladas so awesome? These are the kinds of burning questions I need answers to. Tell me!

[Qdrop]

You can't spell Bob without BO

can't spell Freebasser without ASS

[Qdrop]

You can't spell Freebasser without ass. Or Free.

you fucker...
stop steppin on my lines!!

[Qdrop]

And speaking of needing to have everything explained to me, why are enchiladas so awesome? These are the kinds of burning questions I need answers to. Tell me!

you ask so much of us.

SO MUCH!!

[Freebasser]

Yeah well you can't spell Qdrop without...

...without...

...shut up :mad:

[ToucanSpam]

you fucker...
stop steppin on my lines!!
Quit hogging the blankets!

[DipDipDive]

you ask so much of us.

SO MUCH!!

JUST ANSWER THE FUCKING QUESTION!!!!!!!

[mickill]

You can't spell mickill without the letters s,e,x and y.

[Freebasser]

Are you sure, Mike?

Microsoft Word says different.

[Kid Presentable]

In recent memory, DDD and Toucan are the only people who I've seen post in Beastie General.

And props to Toucan for the complex ballet he seems to dance every day on these boards.

[ToucanSpam]

Are you sure, Mike?

Microsoft Word says different.
You mean that cocksucker paper clip? He don't know shit.

[DipDipDive]

In recent memory, DDD and Toucan are the only people who I've seen post in Beastie General.

And props to Toucan for the complex ballet he seems to dance every day on these boards.

I posted in BG recently?

[mickill]

Are you sure, Mike?

Microsoft Word says different.
I meant in the Bulgarian alphabet...yeah, that's what I meant.

[Monsieur Decuts]

you people need more dipping dots in yer diet

[Kid Presentable]

I posted in BG recently?
Ages ago.

[Freebasser]

I meant in the Bulgarian alphabet...yeah, that's what I meant.

Bulimia?

Shit, you should get that seen to.

[DipDipDive]

Ages ago.

Ah. I'm pretty sure my last post in BG was in that captivating thread about the Ch-Check It Out video being played in American Eagle. Fascinating stuff.

[ToucanSpam]

what is an enchilada?

[DipDipDive]

what is an enchilada?

Are you fucking kidding me?

[mickill]

He's Canadian. Give him a break.

[ToucanSpam]

I live on an island dominated by scottish and french people, with one taco bell and no way to eat there. I know its some kind of food thing, but I have never had one.

[Monsieur Decuts]

i've always though that Nova Scotia is screaming for a good late night Burrito spot. Fuck pitas made some guys rich how about a A donair burrito? mmmmmm

[Nuzzolese]

I'd rather die alone than be one half of a boring old bitchy suburban couple who sit around watching shit TV and whining about PMS and our awful government all the time.

[DipDipDive]

I'd rather die alone than be one half of a boring old bitchy suburban couple who sit around watching shit TV and whining about PMS and our awful government all the time.

But I hear marriage gets sweet post menopause.

[CJM]

I'd rather die alone than be one half of a boring old bitchy suburban couple who sit around watching shit TV and whining about PMS and our awful government all the time.

^but what if the sex was really, really good?

[Qdrop]

be one half of a boring old bitchy suburban couple who sit around watching shit TV and whining about PMS and our awful government all the time.

^see...now that is heaven to me.

to each there own...

[Nuzzolese]

^but what if the sex was really, really good?

As long as the drugs and rock n roll are there, I could do without sex.

[Qdrop]

i wonder if nuzz and DDD realize they are a textbook example of kindred spirits?

[Nuzzolese]

Maybe we ought to adopt some cats and move to Vermont.

[DipDipDive]

i wonder if nuzz and DDD realize they are a textbook example of kindred spirits?

I do quite a bit of whining about our awful government. I don't think we're meant to be. :(

[ToucanSpam]

I can't wait to be 40. Seriously.

[Nuzzolese]

And she does whine about PMS.

[DipDipDive]

Oh, I get it. Your previous post was a shot at me. Awesome.

[CJM]

you guys are too tense. everyone should listen to Soak Up the Sun by Sheryl Crow and take some deep breaths while counting to ten.

[mickill]

you guys are too tense. everyone should listen to Soak Up the Sun by Sheryl Crow and take some deep breaths while counting to ten.
Why the hell would anyone that isn't a raging homo wanna do that?

[CJM]

^meh, good memories assoctiated with that song.


on another note, is this guy always so hostile?

[Qdrop]

Oh, I get it. Your previous post was a shot at me. Awesome.

you're like 5 posts behind everyone today...

[roosta]

^meh, good memories assoctiated with that song.


on another note, is this guy always so hostile?

only when you mention homo songs like Soak Up The Sun

[ToucanSpam]

^meh, good memories assoctiated with that song.


on another note, is this guy always so hostile?
Shh! Don't let him see that, he'll beat us more...

[CJM]

man, i have no friends today...and then Toucan comes out of nowheres.

[roosta]

man, i have no friends today...and then Toucan comes out of nowheres.

probably shouldnt publicly admit liking Sheryl Crow

[CJM]

meh, still like the song.

[mickill]

probably shouldnt publicly admit liking Sheryl Crow
Nevermind the fact that you also picked the gayest Sheryl Crow song imaginable.

[ToucanSpam]

what does 'gayest' even mean?

[mickill]

what does 'gayest' even mean?
Go look in a mirror.

[ToucanSpam]

Go look in a mirror.
You sir, are an asshole.

[Nuzzolese]

Oh, I get it. Your previous post was a shot at me. Awesome.

Whose? Mine? Mine wasn't.

[Nuzzolese]

Is it just me or is Cheryl Crow looking more and more like Iggy Pop?

[mickill]

You sir, are an asshole.
Um, yeah, I know that.......I don't really quite know where you're going with this.

[ToucanSpam]

Um, yeah, I know that.......I don't really quite know where you're going with this.
Nowhere really. I applaud your tremendous skills at being one. I only hope one day I can be just like you. Have any tips?

[cj hood]

calling your family members out or acting revenge with something grossly false...

[mickill]

I never talked about your family.

[cj hood]

I never talked about your family.

that was your brother rob money...

[mickill]

Oh okay.