guess what the client is charged with

[befsquire]

actual scenarios i've seen or heard. i'll give the synopsis, you tell me what charge you think he or she picked up, whether it's a felony or misdemeanor, etc.

43 year old male drinking beer in a park. sees an officer approaching and dumps the beer out.

2 charges.

go.

[TurdBerglar]

public drunkeness, littering?

[jackrock]

open alcohol in public, littering seen it happen

[befsquire]

the open container portion is correct. the second charge he picked up is a felony.

[jackrock]

open alcohol in public... ... does the fact that he's in a park have anything to do with it :confused:

[befsquire]

nope.

[jackrock]

ok ok... ...wasting of a perfectly good beverage? :D

[The Notorious LOL]

sodomy!

[befsquire]

haha. no.

the felony charge he picked up was tampering with physical evidence. because the officer was going to investigate the open container.

[jackrock]

ooooohh good one... next! (!) (y)

[befsquire]

18 year old male throws fruit punch at his mother (charge 1). 2 LEOs come to investigate charge 1. they see the male walking through the apt complex and tell him to stop. he starts to run. they tell him again to stop, but he doesn't. he runs toward his mother and says "i'm going to kick your ass" (charge 2) but runs right past her. he stops running, but continues to put distance between himself and the LEOs. he then assumes a "fighting stance" and says to the LEOs "I'm gonna fuck you up" (charges 3 and 4) and takes off running again. he is then "escorted" to the ground and tasered.

2 felonies and 2 misdemeanors.


*key: LEO = law enforcement officer

[jackrock]

i'm not even gonna try at this one.

[Documad]

Question about the first one: is it illegal to have an open container when you're not near a car? :confused:

[Medellia]

Simple assault, resisting arrest, and two counts of threatening an officer(s).

[Bob]

and this is why i want to go to law school :confused:

[Medellia]

Assault, Threat, Harassement + escaping authority(resisting arrest)?
She said the threat was charges 3 and 4, so harassment is probably out. Good guesses otherwise though. (y)

[befsquire]

documad: city ordinance makes it illegal.

yes to assault. for the statement to the mom about kicking her ass.

close on the resisting charges. 2 counts of resisting officer with violence.

the kool-aid at the mom is a domestic violence battery charge.

[Documad]

See what happens when you throw stuff at your mom? :)

[jackrock]

See what happens when you throw stuff at your mom? :)
and waste fruit punch!

[befsquire]

22 year old male with a rear wheel drive car is backing out of a parking space. the pavement is somewhat wet and his tires spin.

1 charge -- misdemeanor.

[Medellia]

yes to assault. for the statement to the mom about kicking her ass.

close on the resisting charges. 2 counts of resisting officer with violence.

the kool-aid at the mom is a domestic violence battery charge.
Doh! Well, I was close.

EDIT-Reckless endangerment?

[Documad]

the felony charge he picked up was tampering with physical evidence. because the officer was going to investigate the open container.
I can't get over the first one. He picked up a felony charge because he was drinking in public. wtf.

[befsquire]

documad: that one drove me nuts too.

[jackrock]

22 year old male with a rear wheel drive car is backing out of a parking space. the pavement is somewhat wet and his tires spin.

1 charge -- misdemeanor.
this is worse than problem solving :mad: ...

seeing as how his tires are spinning he would have to accelerate fast enough for them to do that!... .... thats a sad excuse for an answer.

[befsquire]

^ you think that's sad, wait til you hear the actual charge.

medillia, you're close but yet so far. it's a criminal traffic violation.

[Documad]

I should stay out of this but it's fun.

22 year old male with a rear wheel drive car is backing out of a parking space. the pavement is somewhat wet and his tires spin.

1 charge -- misdemeanor.
This is my favorite city ordinance. Every tiny town in my state has it. Most call it unlawful acceleration. It's a great pretext to pull over a hot car driven by young males and find out if they've been drinking. :p

[befsquire]

^ oh, it's way worse than that. but the definition includes an exhibition of speed.

[Medellia]

Hmmmm, this is a toughie. I'm just gonna go with DUI.

Dammit, nevermind then.

[befsquire]

no. but i've had many a dui that began by pulling the people over on this particular bullshit charge.

[befsquire]

i assume the 3 people here give up.

racing on the highway.

[jackrock]

uhh huh??

next lol

[Documad]

i assume the 3 people here give up.

racing on the highway.
LOLZ!!!

[befsquire]

18 year old female's boyfriend is being arrested. female keeps asking LEOs why he's being arrested and they keep telling her to back off and stand to the side. she then turns to walk away from the LEO, and her breast hits the LEO's arm.

1 misdemeanor, 1 felony.

[jackrock]

uhh questioning an officer of the law (?wtf?)

[Medellia]

So was the girl arrested too? Erm, possesion and assaulting an officer? This one is confusing. :(

[befsquire]

the girl was arrested.

out of curiosity, what is your definition of assault? in florida, it's putting someone in fear of imminent harm.

[Bob]

so long story short: do you enjoy your job?

totally non sequitur, i know, but i'm in the middle of a life decision at the moment

edit: and i'm drunk

[jackrock]

so long story short: do you enjoy your job?

totally non sequitur, i know, but i'm in the middle of a life decision at the moment

edit: and i'm drunk
ok sorry ot go so off topic but bob, i just clicked your sig and i laughed.. i dont understand whats goin down with all that.. but funny none the less (y)

back to topic!

[Medellia]

I have no idea what the legal definition here is, but a situation like that (breast hitting the officers arm) the person would likely have "assaulting an officer" added to the list. I'm basing my guesses on how they do things here on some of these scenarios.

Erm, resisting arrest would be one.

[Documad]

In Minnesota, assault is committing an act with intent to cause fear in another of bodily harm OR intentionally inflicting or attempting to inflict bodily harm. They added battery right in. I think. I'm v.v.rusty.

[befsquire]

bob, i absolutely love it. while these bullshit cases piss me off when i see them, they're also funny. when several of us take a break to smoke outside, all of our stories start with "i got a guy..." and then the charges and what to do about them.

it's nice when you can win a case that never should have been filed in the first place. sometimes your client goes to jail, but recognizes that's where they should be and that maybe they can get clean by entering a program. sometimes they're just glad you are willing to listen to their story and their life and try to figure out how to get it back on track. and then there are some who just want a trial because they're entitled to one, and they don't care about the outcome, just that justice is done how it's supposed to be done. those make it worth it. the rest are assholes that make you appreciate your insane clients, like the one who believes hulk hogan is his father so he moved to florida to meet his dad.

i love going to work. i don't mind staying late. i complain about the pay, but who isn't underpaid?

[Documad]

18 year old female's boyfriend is being arrested. female keeps asking LEOs why he's being arrested and they keep telling her to back off and stand to the side. she then turns to walk away from the LEO, and her breast hits the LEO's arm.

1 misdemeanor, 1 felony.
obstruction of justice? or the catchall -- disorderly conduct? :confused:

[befsquire]

documad: the state's burden when there's a threat, in order to show imminent harm, is that there must be an action coupled with the threat.

i asked because every state is different, and everyone thinks that assault includes some form of touching.

medillia: you are essentially right then considering your definition, only it's battery on a law enforcement officer. and yes, there was a resisting arrest without violence because she obstructed a LEO in a lawful execution of a legal duty.

[Bob]

ha. well i guess i can't argue with that. over the winter i'll be working for a disability insurance company again for about 8.50 an hour and i have a feeling, this year i'll be taking calls from claimants who are wondering why they aren't getting benefits, and the answer is, because they had a pre-existing condition, which is insurance speak for "haha, fuck you", but my job is to not swear as i explain that to them

i forget where i was going with this, but i think it had something to do with the fact that work generally sucks and i might as well be an expert.

err anyway yeah, i'm basically going to law school because i've just been through 4 years of undergrad college and i basically just feel like an incredibly smart high school graduate with no employable skills. i'm a political science major and i have a bunch of poli sci major friends, and they're all going to law school, and what i've learned is, if you're a poli sci major, you do one of two things: you go to law school, or you take temp jobs for the rest of your life. as much as i love temp jobs...

anyway sorry to derail but that's why i asked if you like your job. that's encouraging, good to hear that you do :)

[befsquire]

not a derail at all. some days my clients make me wonder whether i'll ever be patient with people again. sometimes, i think i'm psychic. for example, i already know the answers to the following questions:

Q1. what do you feel would be a good resolution to your case?
A. if it got dropped.

Q2. the state's offer is (insert amount of jail / prison time here).
A. oh, i can't do jail / prison time. i have a job / wife / kids / sick mother.

[Documad]

Beth, it's really wonderful to see someone who is really in the right profession. A lot of lawyers I know are not suited for it. You clearly are. You're perfect for criminal defense, but I am sure that you would be good at any type of litigation. Or whatever you decide to do.

Bob, are you going to go to law school next year? when do you have to apply?

[Bob]

haha. yeah, the more i work with people, the less patience i have with them. i'm totally tempted to become a nihilist, i swear to god, as an only child, i think i'm suited to it, when it comes down to it, i really only think about myself. what? you need me to drive you to the hospital? dude, i'm totally about to get high score in resident evil, what are you...this is not the time ok

but yeah, my former poli sci major/now in law school friends have taken their first finals and they've completely gotten their asses kicked. i took a look at their final papers, they're like 12 pages long, i don't wanna do that. why am i doing that? why am i paying another $10,000 a semester to do that?

then again, when i was in high school/in my first year in college, i was asking myself what the fuck i was doing in college, and now i here i am, close to the end of an impressive four years, so...here we go, i guess.

if i were to pursue a life right now, i wouldn't know what the fuck to do, so i can't feel too bad about the path i've chosen...yeah, that's the ticket

edit: the deadlines for my applications are generally around march of 2006. but they seem to have rolling applications, so the sooner the better. i don't have any letters of recommendation yet, but i'm going to ask soon. i've just finished with finals, i'm thinking at this point, my best bet is to wait until my grades are in. after finals, professors only have like a week or two to turn in their final grades, so i'm thinking right now, my profs are fairly busy, i should wait until they are less busy.

[befsquire]

what a nice compliment! thanks documad. :)

ok, last one for today.

*note: for some reason, a lot of people on this planet believe that if you ask whether someone is a cop and he / she is, then he / she must admit it. NOT TRUE.

female is on a corner in a high crime area. a car approaches and the male asks her what she's up to. she says she's looking to party. he tells her to get in the car. she gets in and asks whether he's a cop. he says no. she says "prove it. show me your cock." and touches his leg.

2 charges.

[Bob]

sexual harrassment, prostitution

edit: i'm sure i'm wrong but this should totally be a regularly updated thread. it'll be like the bbmb game show

[Documad]

*note: for some reason, a lot of people on this planet believe that if you ask whether someone is a cop and he / she is, then he / she must admit it. NOT TRUE.
That myth comes from TV and film. :rolleyes: In fact, your whole scenario comes right out of the movies. That's how your client got the good idea to ask to see his cock too. I can't think of an example, but I can see it, errr.

[cosmo105]

edit: and i'm drunk
NUH UH! ME TOO! OMG!

[befsquire]

you are close with the prostitution angle, bob. in your state, it may be prostitution. here, it falls under the general solicitation statute (asking to see his cock). she was soliciting another to commit a lewd act.

so, what's the other charge here?

[cosmo105]

asking to see a cop's wang!

[Documad]

I'm stumped.

[Bob]

it wasn't sexual harassment?

hmm...it's not harrassment related at all? rape of some sort? colorful language?

i don't rightly know

[befsquire]

cosmo, you are so gonna make steger get a cop outfit now, aren't you?

when she touched his leg, that was battery on a LEO.

[cosmo105]

oh my officer, please, there is no need for unnecessary force!

also: awesome thread

[Bob]

cosmo, you are so gonna make steger get a cop outfit now, aren't you?

when she touched his leg, that was battery on a LEO.

battery?!?!

i think i was the closest, i should get the point for this round

[befsquire]

bob, you did see that you scored a point on the prostitution / solicitation angle, right?

[befsquire]

thanks jess :)

i was wanting to do a "post here" type thread, and i thought this was a decent alternative.

[Bob]

bob, you did see that you scored a point on the prostitution / solicitation angle, right?

yeah but i want two

[cosmo105]

bef: i miss you and stuff

[Documad]

Doesn't she have to know he's a cop for the battery charge? He denied it. :confused:

[Bob]

Doesn't she have to know he's a cop for the battery charge? He denied it. :confused:

i'll take the case!

[befsquire]

documad: the state attorney's intake division is filled with idiots.




i miss you too jess :(

[CJM]

this is an interesting thread. i don't know much about law, but the stories are cool.

[ms.peachy]

I love bef's "on the job" stories.

[Mot]

The best thread in a long time. Very informative, especially since I live in Florida.

[befsquire]

so, anyone wanna play?

not my client specifically, but a client of a friend from work.

woman is suicidal and wants to die. she is insider her trailer, and douses herself with gasoline and then lights herself on fire. she does not die, though she came close. she had 3rd degree burns over 80% of her body, and has gone through all that painful debridement (or however you spell it) and then the skin grafts.

[jackrock]

Grand theft auto.

[tracky]

arson

[befsquire]

indeed it was arson. the trailer burned and it didn't belong to her, and i guess maybe the owner doesn't have insurance. when the attorney pointed out to the prosecutor that she didn't intend to burn the trailer, he said the next time the client decided to set herself on fire, she should do it in a trailer she owns.

[jackrock]

she is insider her trailer
and you didnt say that the trailer burned!

you're cheating, that's what you're doing.


do another!

[tracky]

lol i love the coldness lawyers sometimes

she'll probably find a way to finish the job properly before she gets charged anyway

[befsquire]

this guy went to trial this week -- it was my trial partner's case.

client is in a car accident (not his fault). fire trucks arrive on scene because the car is still sort of smoking. he is on the phone with his sister-in-law because it's her vehicle, her insurance, etc. 5 deputies are there as well. he walks off to the side because it's hard to hear, and a trooper arrives on scene, claiming the client is leaving the scene of the accident. 5 officers tackle the client from behind, and he is arrested and put in the back of the police car. the trooper also uses a taser on the client, twice. the client doesn't feel good, so he starts kicking the door to get their attention because the cruiser is off, the doors are locked and the windows are up and none of the cops would open the door to give him some air. on the third kick, he kicks the window and it breaks.

[tracky]

resisting arrest?

[befsquire]

no, though i'm surprised they didn't try to add that one. the trooper was a total dick.

[jackrock]

vandalism
DUI

[befsquire]

no, but you're close with the vandalism. it's criminal mischief.

there's still one charge left (felony).

give up?

[jackrock]

yes

[befsquire]

escape from transport. the cop said, on the stand "the only reason anyone would want to kick out a window is to escape." meanwhile, they dragged him out of the car.

anyway, jury found him not guilty of criminal mischief and not guilty of escape. yay!

[jackrock]

yay!

another! another!

[kaiser soze]

felony, hmmm

how about Talking on a cellphone while cops tackle you?

god these cases are outrageous....and hilarious!

It's funny what kind of pussies cops are when they can charge you for battery, assault, attempted murder when someone touches them, but hell..give them a bazooka and raid a house with innocent children in it and they are invincible and invisible to the law!

Or when cops beat someone down, taser them for 20 minutes...etc. etc. the people have no chance of winning a charge against the fuckers for excessive force

the law is a lie

[befsquire]

client walks into bank 1. he passes a note to the teller that says "please give me $5,000 in $100 bills. use the bills on the bottom of the stack and no dye packs. then please give me back the note with the money." the teller gives him the $5,000 and he walks out, rips off his velcro outfit and puts it in the trash, walks almost right next door to a bike shop where he uses some money to buy a bike and then he rides away. he goes into bank 2 and does the same exact thing, only he doesn't have to purchase a bike after he leaves.

[kaiser soze]

let's see

charge 1 - wearing a velcro suit into a bank
charge 2 - buying a cheap ass Huffy while having $5,000 in his pocket

[jackrock]

Huffy.. haha


Grand theft money

[befsquire]

i actually don't know what kind of bike he bought.

but no.

he pulled something similar in another county and they caught him. they then alerted deputies over here, and told the deputies they could get him to confess by promising they'd give him his bible if he told the truth because he's somewhat mental and is obsessed with this bible. oh, and banks caused his downfall.

[befsquire]

yes, it was not bank robbery because he never implied he had a weapon nor did he threaten anyone in any way. he merely asked for the money, politely, and they gave it to him. had they said no, he'd have walked out. technically speaking, it isn't theft if someone gives you something. i have a feeling no jury would go along with that though.

[kaiser soze]

I'm gonna go to a bank and ask for money....this just might work!

[befsquire]

client is extremely drunk and is walking home at 1:00am when he happens upon a construction site. there's an earthmover or bulldozer there, with the keys in it. he starts the machine and drives it onto the road. a guy who works for the construction company sees the client and the machine, knows that belongs to the company he works for and does not recognize the guy and calls the cops. the cops find the client still in the machine, moving dirt at a different construction site. they finally get him out of it and they smell an "overwhelming odor of the impurities of alcohol" and make him do field sobriety tests.

3 charges.

[jackrock]

DUI
GTA
interfering with construction work

[befsquire]

the dui and gta are right. there's one left, related to the gta.

[jackrock]

the guy doesnt have the proper class license to drive the machine!

[Laver1969]

trespassing or breaking and entering?

[TimDoolan]

the felony charge he picked up was tampering with physical evidence. because the officer was going to investigate the open container.

I was going to say obstruction of justice.

[jlees_mcsd]

Wow as a future police officer this is interesting.......you relize that P.A. are nit picky don't you?

[befsquire]

jackrock, that's pretty damn good. had the cops thought of it, they could have charged him with that too.

laver, the site wasn't fenced, so he wasn't charged with trespass. our burglary statutes encompass breaking and entering, there just has to be an intent to commit a crime therein. generally speaking, construction sites have their own statute which includes a trespass rather than burglary. but well done as well.


the third charge was grand theft over $100,000, which is a first degree felony punishable by up to 25 years. the state dropped that charge, and he pled to the GTA and DUI and got a year probation with credit for time served.

[jackrock]

YES! i knew reading thats drivers handbook would payoff someday!

[jlees_mcsd]

If you get drunk and don't feel like walkin home call a cab dude.

[befsquire]

client is arrested and taken to jail for possession of xanax (she doesn't have a prescription, and xanax is a controlled substance according to florida statutes). she's booked into the jail and is in central booking in a cell with a couple other women, one of whom is asleep. the one who is asleep gets bailed out and the corrections officers call out the sleeping girl's name to be released. the client takes that girl's paperwork, claiming to be that girl.

what charge did the client pick up while in jail?

[jackrock]

Identity theft
drug paraphenelia (sp?)

[jlees_mcsd]

Identity theft?

[befsquire]

jackrock -- not paraphernalia; i already gave you the charge she was sent to jail on, i just wanted the new charge.

they should have charged her with some sort of identity theft, like fraudulent use of personal identification, but they didn't.

think jail + release she wasn't entitled to = ???

[jlees_mcsd]

Escape!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[jackrock]

fraudelent use of ID theft? i dont know, i give up!

edit: Escape!!

[befsquire]

yes, twas escape from a county facility.



k, i'm going out to smoke while you come up with this one's charges.

client walks out of a bar at closing, loaded, with a beer. cop tells him he can't have that in public. client drops it accidentally and it breaks. cop tells him that he'll clean it up (he was scared the client would just end up cutting himself on the broken glass) and tells him to just start walking home. client walks part way across the road then stands in the middle of it, cursing at the cop. cop tells him to go home and get out of the road. client refuses. cop tells him again and the client refuses. this goes on for a bit and then cars are coming and have to swerve around the client. client tries to run away from cop who is now walking into the road to get the client. client swings at the cops head and misses by a mile. the swing and miss makes the client fall, and while he's on the ground, the cop puts cuffs on client and picks him up and puts him in the back of a cruiser. client starts banging his head on the window. client then stops that and kicks the window out of the cruiser, climbs out of the window (cutting himself on the glass) and tries to run into the road again. another cruiser is called, and while trying to hogtie the client, he kicks the cop several times.

as you're aware from an earlier post, the kicking of the window is criminal mischief. he picked up two other charges from this.

[jackrock]

Distracting drivers
Attempt to harm officer\ assault on officer

p.s. quit smoking, pleeeaaasee? :)

[jlees_mcsd]

Assaulting an officer and restricting traffic?
Wow a pool of legal terms....
Look out the future of law enforcement rest here
a bad grammer and spelling night owl.

[befsquire]

the officer was actually a really, really nice guy and decided not to charge him with everything possible. so, no traffic related items.

here, our battery is most state's assault. but, he did not charge him with battery on a law enforcement officer. he did charge him with something closely related though.

the other charge is related to being really, super drunk.

[jackrock]

/give up :(

[jlees_mcsd]

/give up :(
me too.

[befsquire]

resisting an officer with violence, and disorderly intoxication.

[jackrock]

that was my next guess.

[jlees_mcsd]

that was my next guess.
HA!

[befsquire]

client is in a car in a high crime area with a known prostitute. he backs the car out of the driveway and the LEO follows him. client runs a stop sign and the cop pulls him over. cop finds out client doesn't have a valid driver's license and while speaking to him, sees the client manipulating something in his mouth which the officer believes, due to his training and experience as a law enforcement officer, to be crack cocaine. client chews and swallows whatever is in his mouth.

2 charges.

[jlees_mcsd]

Running a stop sign and crackin his gum? ha ha

[befsquire]

i pretty much gave you one of the charges (but no, he wasn't cited for running the stop sign since the cop had two criminal charges to nail him with)

[jlees_mcsd]

solisiting a prostitute and trafficing illegal substance.

[befsquire]

the hooker did not admit to it or she'd have been charged too. she was just being given "a ride" by the client. not illegal to help a hooker out with a ride. :)

cop finds out client doesn't have a valid driver's license
charge one, a misdemeanor.


sees the client manipulating something in his mouth which the officer believes, due to his training and experience as a law enforcement officer, to be crack cocaine. client chews and swallows whatever is in his mouth.
charge 2, a felony.

[jlees_mcsd]

I thought I was close too damn it.
operating w/o a license and possession of crack cocaine.

[befsquire]

he couldn't be charged with possession of cocaine because there was no evidence left to test. because he tampered with it by swallowing it. so, tampering with physical evidence and the driving charge, which in florida is driving while license suspended / revoked / canceled.

[jlees_mcsd]

cool....well it is time for me to get some sleep. night.

[jackrock]

bef you still there?