I need to talk about something.

[Nuzzolese]

Sometimes a person in a relationship requires a lot of reassurance and attention to feel special and happy. I have trouble with this, I don't know why. I always come off too aloof because I've always been content without someone. When I don't desperately need someone, it's hard to show that I really appreciate someone. I give people space, maybe too much space, and take things slowly, maybe too slowly. I need to learn how to make people feel special. Relative to how I am with most people, I feel like I've really let someone specific into my life, and have done a lot to make him feel special - gifts, talking, time together, plans, cancelling other things to be with him - but he doesn't feel that way. He still feels insecure at times about the way I act which to him suggests that he's doing all the work and initiating all the plans. It's going to take work to keep this one happy. How do you balance it? Making someone feel special and important without being pushy and smothering them. Being your own independent person while giving enough of yourself to someone else.

[Freebasser]

Let him do you up the no-no.

[Nuzzolese]

That makes a duder feel special?

[Freebasser]

Hmmm... I wasn't expecting a question.

...line?

[Kid Presentable]

Most of your problems can be resolved with sex.

But then the relationship won't last.

[Tzar]

...line?

*scrambles hands, folding and flipping through a thick, stappled collection of paper*

[DandyFop]

This sounds like a situation I've been in a few times. Problem being, it always ended up the same way - eventually I realized that it didn't matter how I acted, he was going to feel that he was putting more into it. I realized that his problems with self-conciousness and all that jazz, weren't my problems to solve and I had to end it.

Now, that's not saying that I always put 100 percent in. If I didn't like him as much, i would slack on my side. But generally when I felt it goin' on, I really put a lot of effort into the relationship.

It's a very bad sign if he is implying that he puts all the work in.

[roosta]

at least he said something. i was in a semi-similar situation and nothing was said and it grew to a point where it killed the whole thing.

[Nuzzolese]

I'm so glad he's saying something, because I was so oblivious, I thought everything was perfectly fine. I think it's just been a misunderstanding. Like, for example a couple of times I didn't return his phone messages with a call. I instead sent him an email which I know he checks daily. But to him, email isn't the same and he wanted to TALK to me. I just didn't pick up on that.

And also I hadn't told my family about him before I brought him over to meet my parents. I just told them I was bringing someone over. I thought it would be easier to introduce them briefly and then we'd go watch a movie downstairs. That really upset him. He said he felt like to them he was just some strange guy in the basement watching a movie. He felt awkward. I never tell my parents about my relationships, I just let them see me with someone and they get the picture.

[ms.peachy]

It's hard to give advice in this situation, because it's difficult for any of us to know if he's being quite unreasonably needy or not. My hunch is that he was probably attracted to you in the first because you're strong and independent, and it was flattering for him intially to him to think "Wow! a chick like this really likes boring old me!" And now that he's with you, wishes you weren't so damn strong and independent, because he's realised that whilst you like being with him, you don't actually need to be with him. It's kind of like those guys that fall for stripper chicks and think "check me out, I got me a hot stripper chick!" and then get mad that these chicks attract attention from other men, if you see what I mean.

[Nuzzolese]

I don't expect solutions or advice necessarily, I just wanted to talk about it.
I know what you mean, Peachy. That might be part of it. He really does go out of his way for me, and to make me feel special. I think he'd just like it if I matched his effort. But I'm afraid to keep upping the stakes too fast, trying to prove ourselves to one another.

[Nuzzolese]

This sounds like a situation I've been in a few times. Problem being, it always ended up the same way - eventually I realized that it didn't matter how I acted, he was going to feel that he was putting more into it. I realized that his problems with self-conciousness and all that jazz, weren't my problems to solve and I had to end it.


It was such a big issue that you had to end it? I guess it sounds like you could never do enough, no matter what you did, he'd always want more.

[Nuzzolese]

at least he said something. i was in a semi-similar situation and nothing was said and it grew to a point where it killed the whole thing.

Me too actually! This has happened to me more than once, with friends and boyfriends. I'm too passive and never wanting to impose on people. I let them come to me. Since this isn't the first time I've gotten this kind of reaction, I don't think it's entirely him and his personal issues. I just thought that this time I was doing it right.

Well, mostly right. Honestly before he said anything I was conscious of him being so much more attentive to me than I was to him, and I would tell myself I would try to be more caring and focused on him and his life. The fact that I would have to TRY is worrisome to him. He thinks that if you really care about a person, that comes naturally. But I disagree, what say you all? I mean, a lot of times you love people and end up taking them for granted. Even in the beginnings of a relationship, you just have fun with them and start to forget that they won't just automatically be there for you without reciprocation.

[Echewta]

I felt the way your man friend has before and it often took me saying something to figure out that the person was giving me their attention as best they could. I was looking for how I thought attention should be given, not how they did. Turns out they were doing a lot when I talk to them about it. I was just blind to it. I suppose I want to date myself. If you've told him that you dig him and that you email is calls back etc., that should be enough for him to get the picture that he's got the staring role.

[Kid Presentable]

I'm so glad he's saying something, because I was so oblivious, I thought everything was perfectly fine. I think it's just been a misunderstanding. Like, for example a couple of times I didn't return his phone messages with a call. I instead sent him an email which I know he checks daily. But to him, email isn't the same and he wanted to TALK to me. I just didn't pick up on that.

And also I hadn't told my family about him before I brought him over to meet my parents. I just told them I was bringing someone over. I thought it would be easier to introduce them briefly and then we'd go watch a movie downstairs. That really upset him. He said he felt like to them he was just some strange guy in the basement watching a movie. He felt awkward. I never tell my parents about my relationships, I just let them see me with someone and they get the picture.

Hey Nuzz, check under his bed and pay attention to the magazines you find. I fear you may have snared a shit-stabber. :(

[Nuzzolese]

I felt the way your man friend has before and it often took me saying something to figure out that the person was giving me their attention as best they could. I was looking for how I thought attention should be given, not how they did. Turns out they were doing a lot when I talk to them about it. I was just blind to it. I suppose I want to date myself. If you've told him that you dig him and that you email is calls back etc., that should be enough for him to get the picture that he's got the staring role.

It takes time to get used to each other's styles.

[Nuzzolese]

Hey Nuzz, check under his bed and pay attention to the magazines you find. I fear you may have snared a shit-stabber. :(

What are the warning signs of a shit-stabber? He has frequently asked me about porn, or gets onto my computer and tells me he's going to look for my porn.

[Echewta]

It really does and its sad sometimes how we expect the worse from someone when they are doing the best they can.

[Kid Presentable]

What are the warning signs of a shit-stabber? He has frequently asked me about porn, or gets onto my computer and tells me he's going to look for my porn.

Oh, you've porn on your computer? Can I look at it sometime?

[Nuzzolese]

Oh, you've porn on your computer? Can I look at it sometime?

I've tried porn but it never appealed to me. I think I need the artsy kind. You know, with contraptions and special effects, and weird camera angles and violins...I don't know.

[Kid Presentable]

I've tried porn but it never appealed to me. I think I need the artsy kind.

The kind with protrusive muff, and the retreating turtle?

Some of that stuff has lots of peeing, and it's really quite vulgar. (y)

[Nuzzolese]

The kind with protrusive muff, and the retreating turtle?

Some of that stuff has lots of peeing, and it's really quite vulgar. (y)

I thought the peeing stuff had its own category. I was thinking more like French people and elaborate strained baroque courtship rituals and stuff like in Dangerous Liasions

[Freebasser]

It seems to make my boyfriend feel special. ;)

Ha... still got it.

[beastieangel01]

at least there is communication about it and you are trying to figure out how to remedy it. Means you care. Not sure what advice I could give though, since I'm more like him in personality. I'm sure just by talking about it though things are already on their way to being improved.

[Nuzzolese]

at least there is communication about it and you are trying to figure out how to remedy it. Means you care. Not sure what advice I could give though, since I'm more like him in personality. I'm sure just by talking about it though things are already on their way to being improved.

Is your boyfriend the same way? Or did you have trouble getting to a secure point with him?

[Kid Presentable]

I thought the peeing stuff had its own category. I was thinking more like French people and elaborate strained baroque courtship rituals and stuff like in Dangerous Liasions

Dude, the French are totally pissing on film. (y)

[abcdefz]

Sometimes a person in a relationship requires a lot of reassurance and attention to feel special and happy. I have trouble with this, I don't know why. I always come off too aloof because I've always been content without someone. When I don't desperately need someone, it's hard to show that I really appreciate someone. I give people space, maybe too much space, and take things slowly, maybe too slowly. I need to learn how to make people feel special. Relative to how I am with most people, I feel like I've really let someone specific into my life, and have done a lot to make him feel special - gifts, talking, time together, plans, cancelling other things to be with him - but he doesn't feel that way. He still feels insecure at times about the way I act which to him suggests that he's doing all the work and initiating all the plans. It's going to take work to keep this one happy. How do you balance it? Making someone feel special and important without being pushy and smothering them. Being your own independent person while giving enough of yourself to someone else.




"Feeling special" is someone else's responsibility; not yours. If you are good about being a friend or good about loving someone in a proper way and they still feel insecure, that's really not your problem. Plus, if someone is insecure and needy by nature, there's nothing you can do to fill that hole, and you'll just get sucked dry if you try.

[beastieangel01]

Is your boyfriend the same way? Or did you have trouble getting to a secure point with him?

in the beginning, he was pretty oblivious to me needing/wanting attention, reassurance, etc.

However, I was also passive aggressive and didn't talk about it or mention it until after it was really, really bothering me so of course there was trouble getting anywhere at that point.

After I finally talked about it with him, things were much better. It's not like he changed over night but he made an effort and kept what I mentioned in mind. Now, sometimes I feel like he goes a tad overboard with the attention, but only a tad. I wish I could explain how he does it, I just know that he is always supportive (unless I'm obviously being retarded and he calls me out on it), and we do keep our seperate friends and spend some time apart, but also sometimes cancel things when it's important that we be together for whatever reason. Sometimes one of us had a really bad day or something of that sort. He is much more vocal than he used to be. Yeah.

[Kid Presentable]

It's funny.

I love you and I'll be with you, but you have to be like this.

Are any of you planning on marrying these people? If not, you should cheat on them, to get it out of your system. That way you'll never do it to someone you actually like the way they are.

[beastieangel01]

it's not about changing someone. It's about showing the other person that you care about them or wanting the other person to show that they care. When I first got in to relationships, I was the sort that thought I didn't need to tell them anything, that they knew by me just dating them. But looking at it outside of myself, I basically treated them like a good friend, which meant like everyone else, but we had sex too. And when in a relationship, that's not good.

Sharing/opening yourself up is important, and so is showing the other person that you care.

Of course, there is a line. For example, if they cannot stand you ever going to hang out with other people and needing you to call them 10 times a day or crap like that. That's not cool.

[Kid Presentable]

it's not about changing someone. It's about showing the other person that you care about them or wanting the other person to show that they care. When I first got in to relationships, I was the sort that thought I didn't need to tell them anything, that they knew by me just dating them. But looking at it outside of myself, I basically treated them like a good friend, which meant like everyone else, but we had sex too. And when in a relationship, that's not good.

Sharing/opening yourself up is important, and so is showing the other person that you care.

Of course, there is a line. For example, if they cannot stand you ever going to hang out with other people and needing you to call them 10 times a day or crap like that. That's not cool.

True love is intuitive man.

[beastieangel01]

true love takes work man. It's called, as someone else just mentioned, compromise.

No one is ever TOTALLY compatible in every single way possible and perfect with never having to work at their relationship. Okay maybe it can happen, in lala land. It takes work, just, again, there is a line.

[Kid Presentable]

true love takes work man. It's called, as someone else just mentioned, compromise.

No one is ever TOTALLY compatible in every single way possible and perfect with never having to work at their relationship. Okay maybe it can happen, in lala land. It takes work, just, again, there is a line.

Yeah, but it shouldn't feel like work. You talk to people about it like you need to know the next move to make, methinks it's not worth the effort.

Maybe I don't understand.

[beastieangel01]

Even though I called it work, doesn't mean it felt like work. If you don't understand what I was saying, then apparently you never experienced it. Perhaps someone else can explain it a bit better.

It isn't always doves and lollipops. But that doesn't mean it's torture. Getting through some rough spots will happen, and if the relationship is meant to last, getting through it makes the relationship all the better.

[Nuzzolese]

I think ideally the only part that shouldn't be work, is deciding whether or not it's worth the effort. I think compromise and effort are part of what results in a stronger relationship, don't you?

[ms.peachy]

Yeah, but it shouldn't feel like work. You talk to people about it like you need to know the next move to make, methinks it's not worth the effort.

Maybe I don't understand.
Sometimes, it does feel like work. No it shouldn't feel like a constant uphill climb, but the fact is, it does sometimes take a little effort.

[Kid Presentable]

Sometimes, it does feel like work. No it shouldn't feel like a constant uphill climb, but the fact is, it does sometimes take a little effort.
For sure. But not to the point where you talk to people about it.

[Kid Presentable]

For sure. But not to the point where you talk to people about it.

I've had a wine bucket thrown at me. Does that count?

[Nuzzolese]

Here comes a stupid comparison.

It's kind of like having a really nice outfit that you love and that makes you look and feel fantastic, you get compliments on it, it's comfortable, and all of that. Then one day you notice a little spot or tear or wrinkle and you're like "Oh no!" so you go try to fix it or get it dry cleaned or something because it's worth the small effort on repairs in order to really feel at home and take pride in it.

I'm such a moron. These things honestly come into my head and I'm like "YEAH! It's just.like.an outfit!"

[beastieangel01]

For sure. But not to the point where you talk to people about it.

sometimes getting some outside perspective can help. Sometimes it doesn't. Doesn't hurt to talk to people about it.

[Nuzzolese]

For sure. But not to the point where you talk to people about it.

Why not? Whether or not you talk to people about issues in your life is just based on your personality in general, right?

[Kid Presentable]

Why not? Whether or not you talk to people about issues in your life is just based on your personality in general, right?

I suppose. I don't trust people and their standards, and the one thing I value is my baby. So I don't talk about any problems we have, I just concentrate on dealing with them.

[Nuzzolese]

sometimes getting some outside perspective can help. Sometimes it doesn't. Doesn't hurt to talk to people about it.

werd. The outside perspective helps, as does hearing myself explain it, which makes it more clear in my mind what I'm really feeling.

[Nuzzolese]

I suppose. I don't trust people and their standards, and the one thing I value is my baby. So I don't talk about any problems we have, I just concentrate on dealing with them.

No one can ruin it for you though, unless you let them.

[Kid Presentable]

No one can ruin it for you though, unless you let them.
what?

[ms.peachy]

For sure. But not to the point where you talk to people about it.
I (and a million relationship counselors the world over) have to disagree.

Sometimes it really helps a lot to talk to other people, or in this case, write. Not just in this situation, but really any situation one is turning over in the mind. Helps you get some persective on your own situation.

I was having a similar conversation with a friend on Saturday actually and the analogy I made to her is that, if your car breaks down on the side of the road, and you don't know how to fix it, what do you do? You call the AA (or AAA if you've broken down in the US) and get some help. And when you do, you don't sit there and beat yourself up feeling guilty for not knowing how to fix it. Well, in this case, there's a breakdown in the relationship. It might not be super serious, just like your car breaking down doesn't mean it needs to be scrapped. You just maybe need some help fixing whatever it is that you don't know how to fix, and maybe it's quite a simple repair. Why should you feel bad or guilty for not knowing how to fix it yourself? But this is what happens, we tell ourselves we should 'know' or be able to 'work it out ourselves.' Well, sometimes we can and and sometimes we can't.

[Kid Presentable]

I (and a million relationship counselors the world over) have to disagree.

Sometimes it really helps a lot to talk to other people, or in this case, write. Not just in this situation, but really any situation one is turning over in the mind. Helps you get some persective on your own situation.

I was having a similar conversation with a friend on Saturday actually and the analogy I made to her is that, if your car breaks down on the side of the road, and you don't know how to fix it, what do you do? You call the AA (or AAA if you've broken down in the US) and get some help. And when you do, you don't sit there and beat yourself up feeling guilty for not knowing how to fix it. Well, in this case, there's a breakdown in the relationship. It might not be super serious, just like your car breaking down doesn't mean it needs to be scrapped. You just maybe need some help fixing whatever it is that you don't know how to fix, and maybe it's quite a simple repair. Why should you feel bad or guilty for not knowing how to fix it yourself? But this is what happens, we tell ourselves we should 'know' or be able to 'work it out ourselves.' Well, sometimes we can and and sometimes we can't.

I hope I'm not conveying that I'm in an unfulfilling, hollow relationship.

I'm marrying my best friend and jungle-sex partner.

I just don't like to talk to people. Least of all about that shit.

[Nuzzolese]

you don't like to talk to people, some do. It's almost like people are not all the same or something!

[Kid Presentable]

you don't like to talk to people, some do. It's almost like people are not all the same or something!

Don't talk to people. Be more like me.

[DandyFop]

nuzz in my situations, it did turn out to be a big of enough issue that we had to break up. But that's for a lot of reasons, including, that just, I realized that we weren't on the same level and I didn't want either of us to deal with that because it's not fair to everyone involved. I think a big part of the problem was that they were more into it than me and obviously as a result my enthusiasm suffered.

I just hope he does come to the realization that you are making an effort. Communication is surely the key to this, and hopefully he figures out that small things to him might feel like big romantical gestures to you. If you really like him it should come through no matter what I would think.

[Nuzzolese]

romantical! You're precious.

Seriously, Dandy, thanks mang. "Go with what you know", right?
I just really like him, and it's been a long time since I've really cared about someone like this. I don't want to fuck it up. I know I'm good to him, and we talk easily. He wants to know I am not going to dump him for the next guy who comes along, and I have to figure out how to demonstrate that. I think in my experience, guys are way more delicate and in need of reassurance than I expect them to be. Or maybe it's just the guys I date.

[Nuzzolese]

Have you ever found it painfully embarrassing to discuss a problem you have, though? I respect him so much for speaking up because if it were me, that would be so difficult. It's bad enough just feeling like you're not appreciated, like you might be making a fool of yourself. It's double the shame admitting to it and asking someone to be understanding.

[DandyFop]

I have a feeling we date the same guys. But yeah like I said I just hope he gets it, my last guy, when we broke up, the second I said "we need to talk" he was like "what's his name?". He just assumed that I had met some other guy....but it turned out he was like going batty and messaging my friends all the time to ask them what something meant that I said and all this jazz. That's why I'm holding out on dating for a while to see if I can meet someone different.

[cosmo105]

give him a promise ring. or tattoo his name on the inside of your lip! now that's hardcore.

[Freebasser]

Tattoo his face on your private area, using the lips as his mouth.

[Nuzzolese]

Sideways you mean?

[Freebasser]

Unless he has a really tall mouth, yes.

[cosmo105]

nah seriously though nuzzizzle i get what you're saying and that's a rough sitch. but i think you've gotten some pretty good feedback here already.

and kid p - a relationship ALWAYS takes work. it's two different people, after all. and eventually some conflicts, however small they may be, will arise. it's meeting halfway and putting the relationship first that's really important.

[Kid Presentable]

Have you ever found it painfully embarrassing to discuss a problem you have, though? I respect him so much for speaking up because if it were me, that would be so difficult. It's bad enough just feeling like you're not appreciated, like you might be making a fool of yourself. It's double the shame admitting to it and asking someone to be understanding.

So what if you get further down the line and he chirps in with more shit you aren't doing right? For real Nuzz, he might just be setting you up for a lifetime of passive-aggressive windbaggery. And what do you get from that? You talk to your friends about it. It's the conversational equivalent of walking into the cupboard door.

[Nuzzolese]

His lips are more beautiful than mine.

[Kid Presentable]

and kid p - a relationship ALWAYS takes work. it's two different people, after all. and eventually some conflicts, however small they may be, will arise. it's meeting halfway and putting the relationship first that's really important.

Oh I know. But that's the realationship, not work.

[Nuzzolese]

So what if you get further down the line and he chirps in with more shit you aren't doing right? For real Nuzz, he might just be setting you up for a lifetime of passive-aggressive windbaggery. And what do you get from that? You talk to your friends about it. It's the conversational equivalent of walking into the cupboard door.

I don't talk to my friends about things in order to solve my problems or ask them to tell me what to do. And if it gets further down the line and he never seems to be satisfied with me then it might not work out. What makes you think I would put up with that for a lifetime? I know the difference between reasonable compromise and being abused. I don't understand the cupboard door comparison.

[cosmo105]

Oh I know. But that's the realationship, not work.
sometimes it does feel like work, i think. it can be frustrating and exhausting. but you do it because it needs to be done and it's worth it to you.

[Kid Presentable]

I don't talk to my friends about things in order to solve my problems or ask them to tell me what to do. And if it gets further down the line and he never seems to be satisfied with me then it might not work out. What makes you think I would put with that for a lifetime? I know the difference between reasonable compromise and being abused.

I was drawing a comparison. I'm drunker than a gangbanging nun.

[Freebasser]

Look can we please move away from this whole "tattooing the face of a loved one on your vagina" thing. It's fucking sick, and you should all be ashamed.

[Kid Presentable]

sometimes it does feel like work, i think. it can be frustrating and exhausting. but you do it because it needs to be done and it's worth it to you.

Yes I do. How are things?

[Nuzzolese]

I know that I can sometimes be oblivious to how I affect other people, I can be unintentionally insensitive. Not on the board, of course, here all my insensitivity is totally calculated and intentional. But I know how I can be and sometimes I have to ask other people's opinions to see how they'd react too. I can't always be as empathetic as I want to be. My dad's the same way.

[cosmo105]

quite nice. :) and you?


edit: except for the fact that the soymilk i used in the frosting for my gingerbread cookies was old and i didn't realize it until the day after and had to throw out all the leftover frosting and the cookies too :(

[cosmo105]

Not on the board, of course, here all my insensitivity is totally calculated and intentional.
and that's why you're so bitchin'.

[Nuzzolese]

I was drawing a comparison. I'm drunker than a gangbanging nun.

And I didn't get the comparison.

[Kid Presentable]

quite nice. :) and you?

Fuckin good. Got on the BBQ last night. Cooked some shit you probably don't want to hear about.

It was good talking to you. I'll see you on Friday. (y)

[Kid Presentable]

And I didn't get the comparison.

Talking to people about how you can make this guy feel better about himself because you're not good enough at massaging his ego, to me, seems a lot like defending an abusive spouse.

[Nuzzolese]

Talking to people about how you can make this guy feel better about himself because you're not good enough at massaging his ego, to me, seems a lot like defending an abusive spouse.

Well, I think you misunderstood. He's not abusive for one thing, and another thing I honestly believe I could be better at communicating my feelings for him, especially considering that he may need it more than the average joe might. And finally, I'm not so delusional that I would allow someone to abuse me. I'm not like that, I don't put up with shit if I think it's not worth it. I mean, if you're concerned then I appreciate it but there's no need to be.

And I know you are just comparing him to an abusive situation, you weren't saying he was being abusive. I think he does appreciate what I do, he just still gets scared.

Some people really demonstrate how they love someone and they're so romantic. I wish I could show it more, be more mindful, not be so selfish, be more considerate.

[cosmo105]

i don't think it's that at all. i think it's just that he feels that affirmation is a certain thing and she realizes she may not give it in the most conventional way and she's asking for opinions and input on what she could do to make him feel secure in her committment to him.

[Kid Presentable]

i don't think it's that at all. i think it's just that he feels that affirmation is a certain thing and she realizes she may not give it in the most conventional way and she's asking for opinions and input on what she could do to make him feel secure in her committment to him.

You're both missing the point.

Nuzz is questioning herself already, in aid of massaging this guys' ego. I'm not syaing he's abusive, per se. More that the doubts raised Nuzzolese about her value and character are somewhat analogous to the doubts raised by a battered wife who wonders if she 'deserved it'.

Nuzzolese you loquacious edit bitch.

[Nuzzolese]

And I was just interested in anything people had to say about making relationships secure and making sure the other person is happy and confident in the whole thing.

[Nuzzolese]

You're both missing the point.

Nuzz is questioning herself already, in aid of massaging this guys' ego. I'm not syaing he's abusive, per se. More that the doubts raised Nuzzolese about her value and character are somewhat analogous to the doubts raised by a battered wife who wonders if she 'deserved it'.

Nuzzolese you loquacious edit bitch.

Well, it's something I've always known was a weakness of mine and it has come up with other people in my past, even just friends and such - where people sometimes don't think I like them as much as I do because I tend not to show it very well. It's something I was thinking about before he even mentioned it. It doesn't make me feel inadequate as much as it motivates me to change for the better. I mean, I do feel sort of like I let him down a couple of times. Maybe he just has to get used to my style and the way I am with people. I don't know. I think he's very needy.

[Kid Presentable]

I mean, I do feel sort of like I let him down.

This how so many sob-stories begin, Nuzzizenuff.

[Nuzzolese]

I always question myself though, so this is nothing new.

[Kid Presentable]

I always question myself though, so this is nothing new.

Me too. If I'm guilty of anything, it's caring too much.

One Love. For the Hip-hop beats. One Love.

[marsdaddy]

You're both missing the point.

Nuzz is questioning herself already, in aid of massaging this guys' ego. I'm not syaing he's abusive, per se. More that the doubts raised Nuzzolese about her value and character are somewhat analogous to the doubts raised by a battered wife who wonders if she 'deserved it'.

Nuzzolese you loquacious edit bitch.You might be missing the point. If he was acting shit out, being passive agressive, and generally getting angry because he wasn't communicating his feelings, then maybe yeah, he'd be asking for an ego massage. It seems to me what he did was make himself pretty vunerable by being honest. And by doing so, he's actually on the road to being secure.

My advice is to sit by yourself for hours and analyze this problem until a solution synthesizes.

[Nuzzolese]

I am loving "loquacious edit bitch" It's going to be all over the runways for Spring/Summer 06.

[Nuzzolese]

It seems to me what he did was make himself pretty vunerable by being honest. And by doing so, he's actually on the road to being secure.


He's just so good! I love him much.