favorite things you frequently hear

[befsquire]

"i'm not trying to do no jail time"

this means: please get me probation because i don't want state prison.

[CJM]

^sounds like a good compromise to me.

[mikizee]

im a poker machine technician. about a zillion times a day when im working on a machine, an old person will come up and say, 'so, can u make this pay out for me? r u gonna rig it so i win?' and then they laugh as if they made up the joke. my response usually is... 'no, but i can pay u out for free, you fucking pokie idiot!!'

a mate of mine is an abseiling window cleaner, and when hes cleaning ground windows he hears also about a zillion times a day:
'u missed a spot! ha!'
or- 'you can come clean my windows if u want! ha!'

[Tzar]

at work;

*product not scanning because it hasn't been put on the computers yet*
*asks for price check*
customer - "oh, that must mean i get it for free, right? :cool:"
me - "no *inserts store policy procedure here*"
customer - "oh :("


gotta love shooting their hopes down.

[adam_f]

Jesus Christ! Could you cum any earlier?!!!?!

Sorry.

[na§tee]

"i'm totally blissed out"
"she was just there, blissing out"
etc.
my flatmate says blissing out all the time. we were watching babies being born for like four hours on discovery home and health one morning and the quiet, chilled out babies [read:near death] were all just "blissing out". when the world around you is crazy and you are not, yr just bllissed out.
we've decided the international signage for blissing out is like the raising the roof gesture, just more laid back.

[kleptomaniac]

"Shut up." and "Go away."



it sure is great to feel wanted. :o

[thegoodmrbrodie!]

whitey.

when one cannot handle one's drugs/drinks, one pulls a whitey. ie - face goes pale and you pay a visit to the facilities.