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View Full Version : Bad Parents, revisited


ms.peachy
03-13-2006, 04:29 PM
I was at the supermarket earlier today and as I was leaving there was another woman also leaving with two children. The boy looked about 6 or 7 and the girl maybe 9 or 10. The mom and the girl were each carrying bags of groceries. The little boy ran up behind the mom and I think he was trying to jump up and throw his arms around her waist, but ended up sort of punching her in the side of the back, and the mom tripped and dropped one of the bags of groceries. Now, I understand she was upset, and the boy clearly needed to be appropriately reprimanded for being careless, but she started absolutely screaming at the little boy and saying things like "What the fuck is wrong you you, you stupid little shit? You are such a little fucking arsehole!"

The poor little boy looked like he wanted to about die, and the girl was clearly embarassed and was saying things to the mother like "Mum stop, you don't need to scream and curse at him like that" and the woman was like "YES I DO HE'S A FUCKING IDIOT" and such.

:eek: :mad: :(

I kind of wanted to do or say something, but I couldn't think wha, you know? I mean, I didn't want to make the situation worse, create more of a scene, etc. Because I felt that the woman was not exactly going to listen to anything I'd have to say rationally, if you see what I mean - it would just escalate and maybe be even harder for the poor kids to take. Because you know how kids are - on the one hand they obviously knew Mum was acting atrociously; but yet, they're still likely feel loyal to her and have mixed feelings about this stranger jumping in and criticising her.

I dunno. Mostly I just wanted to give the poor little boy a hug, and tell him he's not an idiot and he's not stupid and he's not an arsehole, and that his mum was wrong to say those things to him. And I felt proud of the little girl for standing up to her mum, and trying to protect her little brother. But overall, the whole situation made me feel sad, and powerless to really do anything.

I just can't forget the look on tha poor little boy's face, though, with his shoulders all hunched up and blinking from the tears and looking so small and scared and ashamed. It's just not right.(n)

cosmo105
03-13-2006, 04:31 PM
that's awful. :(

Guy Incognito
03-13-2006, 04:33 PM
Thats bad - seein stuff like that makes me think that if they're doing stuff like that in public then it might be a lot worse inside their own four walls and that worries me.

ms.peachy
03-13-2006, 04:38 PM
Thats bad - seein stuff like that makes me think that if they're doing stuff like that in public then it might be a lot worse inside their own four walls and that worries me.
Yeah, I know - that's what was going through my mind as well: that this is not a "one off". Like, if you feel comfortable screaming at your child that he's a 'fucking arsehole' in public, in the middle of the day, on a busy street, then how far do you go behind closed doors?

If they were like neighbours or people who I knew where they lived or something I'd call social services, but what can I do when it's just some people I happen to see outside the supermarket?

Planetary
03-13-2006, 04:39 PM
i see stuff like that sometimes, makes me very angry. these people clearly aren't fit for parenting...

on a funny note, i heard on the news today that this bloke was applying for higher funds off the council because he ddnt haver enough money to pay the bills and feed his wife, his pregnant girlfriend and his 15 children. all in the same house. WHAT THE FUCK?! sterylise.

Guy Incognito
03-13-2006, 04:48 PM
Yeah, I know - that's what was going through my mind as well: that this is not a "one off". Like, if you feel comfortable screaming at your child that he's a 'fucking arsehole' in public, in the middle of the day, on a busy street, then how far do you go behind closed doors?

If they were like neighbours or people who I knew where they lived or something I'd call social services, but what can I do when it's just some people I happen to see outside the supermarket?

Its hard to judge though - i would be afraid to do anythin in case i just caught someone havin a really bad day.

To be honest my mum used to be quite shouty and nasty to me when we were out and she thought i might be showing her up a bit but she wouldnt dream of hittin me or anythin. I think she was just a bit self conscious and that if i was acting up or doin summat stupid that that might reflect on her parenting.

Ace42X
03-13-2006, 05:01 PM
I kind of wanted to do or say something, but I couldn't think wha, you know? I mean, I didn't want to make the situation worse, create more of a scene, etc.

Hah, you have been so anglicised.

ms.peachy
03-13-2006, 05:11 PM
Hah, you have been so anglicised.
Hmm, maybe, but I don't know that I would have done differently in the US. Because it wasn't that I didn't want to make a scene for what anyone would have thought of me, it was that I didn't want to make it more difficult for the kids than it already was. As I said, even kids with the worst parents still love them and would feel some loyalty to the parent, no matter how badly they've been treated, and I just didn't see how me confronting the woman would actually do any real good. It might make ME feel better, but would it really have helped, is what I guess I'm trying to say.