Spam, so surreal

[abcdefz]

....the surreal introductory text on spam sometimes just baffles me. Who's they get to write this stuff? I thought Allen Ginsberg was dead.


pardon me as boyfriend cryptic ailing likeness this nourishing

scholarship a divorced a procreate, cocoa powder as babble, diligence even at... behold, at resolution
carbon paper of dodge the on rhythmic fortune cookie sport of K: in daintily, prescribe the to...

[marsdaddy]

I heard they arrested 4 Nigerians last week. Now the emails should start asking for bail money.

[abcdefz]

Woman is the Nigerian of the world.

[synch]

I've been getting tons of spam with "investment tips". I normally don't even read them but I was glancing one because of this topic and found a link in it with a disclaimer of some sort. It made me laugh anyway :)

The spam messages are all:

Make money! Buy this stock! Climbed 100%! Get in there fast!

This was in the disclaimer (among other things):

The publisher of this newsletter advises all readers and subscribers to seek advice from a registered professional securities representative before deciding to trade in stocks featured within this email. None of the material within this report shall be construed as any kind of investment advice or offer to sell or solicitation of an offer to buy securities. Many of these companies are on the verge of bankruptcy. You can lose all your money by investing in this stock. The publisher of this newsletter is not a registered investment advisor. Subscribers should not view information herein as legal, tax, accounting or investment advice. Any reference to past performance(s) of companies is specially selected to be referenced based on the favorable performance of these companies.

[abcdefz]

^
That's beautiful.

[abcdefz]

...that's actually the part that made me think it's almost poetry. :D

Is there, like... an auto-word generator that spits this stuff out? Or are there truly 1000 monkeys at 1000 typewriters?

[cosmo105]

like, hellooooo (http://www.beastieboys.com/bbs/showthread.php?t=62474)

[abcdefz]

Fair enough. I should've searched. Mea culpa.

[marsdaddy]

Flattery can be the sincerest form of immitation.

[cosmo105]

don't sweat it. the gmail spam poetry i get is a little gift each morning. who needs quote-a-day planners when i've got sandwich sandwich husband returning friend fruit flies garter beckoning return smal di3k have bigg3r trench muffins?

[abcdefz]

managerial was as glitz rubber band, as sleepy, arid, to salesman is forcibly, cameo the in fateful as
hierarchical slow the incalculable bonnet gushy oppress directive touch queasy. suction recreational as oriental
cardigan tabulate of prime perforate an viable.

[b-grrrlie]

What about these lottery winnings? I don't know how many millions I should've been collecting...
Oh yeah I shouldn't have told anyone...

[abcdefz]

deduct tomcat, helm embrace happening the scramble system or New World, the vaginal,. of uproar
grandparent location predictably agriculture this pitch that vol. beauty as spade an
pyramid classy opossum, and beater attend asthmatic but as rags the as an
nymph bedclothes folk music dead end ventilator inconspicuous of folk music as disoriented, sociable
straw crystal or DC a of!!! umpteenth to
concerto vacillate the an impropriety? courtesy paramilitary the? curb chain smoker a as s of regeneration?! easterner
brightness by upside-down as premium in and

[GoldenFutterman]

HAHAHa,My sister's Laptop is full of stupid Spam,a few weeks I saw an ad about your computer sure and appear a picture of a man putting a condom in the internet wire :D

[cosmo105]

nature of the emotions of the boy Telfer arose. His _sang froid_ had lying in her lap in imitation of the pose maintained so haughtily by the
her filled with truth as a deep spring is filled with clear water. He ran here and there, appearing and disappearing, the glare of the furnace
of his hand another thousand men of an Indiana town sold their homes, with through the manipulation of the public during the day, he sometimes sat
filled with an infinite weariness.He ran through the door and dropped on his knees by her bed. She turned You and men like you can do anything. You can even fail. I cannot. None of

[rirv]

....the surreal introductory text on spam sometimes just baffles me. Who's they get to write this stuff? I thought Allen Ginsberg was dead.
next to of course god america i...

I'm afraid Ginsberg just faked his death and now lives a quiet life writing spam emails. Elvis also faked his death and spend his time writing advertisment jingles for commercial radio.

[synch]

and remember who is the real King under the Mountain!
He rose in fire and went away south towards the Running River.
Chapter 13
Not at Home
In the meanwhile, the dwarves sat in darkness, and utter silence fell
about them. Little they ate and little they spoke. They could not
count

Words to live by...

[abcdefz]

Doris ankles with a gasp and fell onto the rough platform of an eagles
eyrie. There he lay without speaking, and his thoughts were a mixture of
surprise at being saved from the fire, and fear lest he fell off that
narrow place into the deep shadows on either side. He was feeling very
queer indeed in his head by this time after the dreadful adventures of
the last three days with next to nothing to eat, and he found himself


Doris = "he" ?

[abcdefz]

I didn't like the looks of that cover. Its shadow wasn't right. The sun
Jonathan with awe in their golden eyes, for they had seen him disappear
"Don't try to talk your way out of this, stalker." He was angry and his
advances of bug-eyed monsters by zap-gun-toting heroes in space armor. There






:confused:

[Bob]

i get these too. for a while i thought fucktopgirl got my email

[abcdefz]

:D

[abcdefz]

builtin Magnifier
gettin Keith
Dolls Spears
ltabbr ltacronym
ONLY Crisis
COMPANY WALTOWN
AdobeMore HomeTrial ReaderGet Ways Buy SearchYou certain sections
Systems. LaGrange Park
Listed
Fax Contact
Husband Split Andersons Soccer
GMS ONSTAR SERVICE ROGUE TRAVEL
companies aligning Cuba
Belmont
farms fouling countrys
detected manner similar often
stupid Act.
true Amorphous
doesnt generates versions
PARKING YOUTH
UPN.com Careers Map Bios
Author: followed Chronis
coloring crafts
HISTORY:
Carmack bitten smitten
SPYWARE SNOW REMOVAL
kept forward onto computer.
doormats.
efforts volumes
Show appearing evening :pm
florida nurs. Limits:
Hillary Club Mrs. Authority

[enree erzweglle]

I just left a meeting where we got off on a tangent about spam and how this local couple gave their life savings or a significant portion of it to someone who runs one of the Nigerian diplomat spam scams.

And this other guy got pulled into some whole scammy spam thing and not only did he "donate" $60K of his own money to the scam artist (not knowing that it was a scam) but he got pulled into doing related scammy things for the guy or the guy's spam organization. He claims that he did this not knowing that it was illegal but it sounds suspicious because it involves second-party checks with names whited-out. He's now facing jail time for doing something like $600K in fraud.

There are people behind the Nigerian guy spam and they've talked about how they've been able to quit their jobs, buy second houses, second cars, etc on the money they've scammed from people. Not that it's bad enough to do a scam and especially one like that for a living but to boast about it too: :rolleyes:

[Ace42X]

For those languishing in the depths of spam, here is some helpful info.

1. There has been a recent upsurge in spam due to "botnets" (trojan infected PCs used as a massive network of 'slaves') being used to brute-force spam literally millions of e-mail addresses, in order to "harvest" genuine ones (IE, they log any e-mail address that doesn't bounce back the generic 'e-mail address on found on server'). If you are being spammed by addresses vaguely similar to yours, this is what happened.

2. They use random data generators to bypass most filters, and similarly use dynamic URLs to avoid their spam-links being filtered out.

3. There is a solution. If you use a POP3 e-mail client, like Outlook Express, you can get http://spambayes.sourceforge.net/ (also works with python) which you can "train" very easily to automatically differentiate between "spam" (crap) and "ham" (genuine messages). It will then allow you to use your e-mail program to filter out the spam easier.

[abcdefz]

to a magnificent animal remove factor fourteen
She said that they on foot had but just litter
reservoir she seemed quite suddenly






"Animal remove factor fourteen" is a kinda nifty turn of phrase.

[na§tee]

agh!! stop it!! it is almost nightmare-ish!

[abcdefz]

"definitely not." . ron looked slightly more cheerful as he delved deeper
into his stocking. m5

[Waus]

I got this one today...

from: become thing
subject: glass aluminum

...? I had to know.

[abcdefz]

diploma erect position, reception although
denim "and track suit I have come to claim her.
have meat Paul for the clergy and

Stan

[jackrock]

scarred to fuckl with a shotr D11CK?

(spelling on purpose)

[cosmo105]

Ill get the champagne! He heard a noise behind him and turned from the blank screen to see Annie coming out of the kitchen dressed in jeans and a red flannel loggers shirt, the chainsaw in her hands. At first, it seemed the same. Distantly, from the parlor, he could hear the rippling strains of Chopin, and he paused with the strip of towel still in his left hand, listening.
[He forced his eyes open.]

(and then a whole huge paragraph about business investments and such...)

"He did in fact believe this. ("Virginia") Sandpipers letter said, were all genuine, not reproductions and while Paul could not tell for sure, he guessed that it was the truth. Geoffrey went back inside, already forgetting the doctors odd remark, already chalking Shinnys equally odd behavior off to age, weariless, and his own sort of grief. He thought, I heard that same sound as a small, unhurt boy, and for a moment he nearly wept.

In the middle was a larger plate, and on this one was a vast (oogy) gooey pile of caviar. First the Smokey, then him.

He set the typewriter down, then rocked it up so he could fish out this new surprise. The plot was melodramatic but well constructed, in its own modest way quite amusing.

[synch]

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[DeeJayZap]

$200,000 Loan for only $917/month at http://6IM.kruelo.net Bad Credit OK.

=============== "That's it," Redrick said and took off his backpack. "Sit down right
has to pay for this, and somebody will! Just wait, just let me get to the
Redrick waited silently. Arthur looked at him hopelessly, nodded, and

been left behind, littering up the Zone like all the empties, bracelets,
me, I don't care. You want the money. You get it. You give me as much as you

[abcdefz]

from !, but go and?, from !! to well
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but !! go hi ! do you why very good but
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well many do you no
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how and how hi you bestto
how very good .
and many,
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many out go to you !!
many no ... ... you ... ... . out
go of and do you
no of of . but are




...this wasn't an IM conversation? :D

[synch]

Yeah, well... I met this 14 year old emo goth raver chick on myspace and...

:D

[abcdefz]

Ohhhhh.... don't do that, Jerry Lee.

[synch]

But she gives me stock tips! :(

This one made me laugh out loud :D

Fish and cast-net nah friend.
Hatred stirs up dissension, but love covers over all wrongs The higher you climb up the ladder, the more people can see your arse
Be just before you are generous
Lazy hands make a man poor, but diligent hands bring wealth
Fools seldom differ A constant guest is never welcome.
Well done is better than well said

[cosmo105]

^hahaha :D

[synch]

Christmas People created IconsPlus Toshiko Otsuki Debis Wonderful
operating forblind impaired
Donkey Defender button scalable. some

I got to get me some Christmas People! They sound versatile.

[abcdefz]

councillor in Belgium, responsible for civilian, youthThe decline also occurred on the day that a plot toCole's last gasp dive blocked the
Irishman's shot.


At last you've found a lass that's hot
You wanna hump her tasteful twat.
She's cute and taking, she's so nice!
But would your penile size suffice?
Not sure she will ask for more?
You need a dic'k she would adore!
But how to make it long and thick?
Your only hope is MegaDik!
You'll get so wanted super-size
And see great pleasure in her eyes!
Your schlong will stuff her box so deep,
Tonight you'll hardly fall asleep!

So try today this magic p'ill
And change your life at your own will!


and development; $30 million for counter-narcotics; $20captors unlocked it before fleeing.Monday after a test flight. One of the A380s is flying
around 3:15AM AEDT when a small red sedan with two menthe way the in-flight dining and entertainment servicesexperts and representatives of a management of the mine

[cosmo105]

hahahaha MegaDik (y)

[b-grrrlie]

from !, but go and?, from !! to well
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how ? ...
well no today hi well are
many go
from outtoday
out no
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you very good well hi well ... go how best
. many ? very good.
no out no but today go...
very good from hi
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many .of ? hi
you are ? , out
why of no out . ? and? but very good
, how to , of
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why of how . you !!
very good today !! of and? from to .. out
and , ... ?
do you best today .. . out
no hi, ... . of, . but to are
to are many hi do you do you
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from why to do youdo you
to out how ! but ,!
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why howhi ? but
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are do you ... out
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do you ! well but very good to
but !! go hi ! do you why very good but
! and? but !
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hi do you, out ... .., and? of of why
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well many do you no
, why and
best to do you how to today
today and?
... do you...
well many
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you to and? , ... how but to !!
you are how whybest
how and how hi you bestto
how very good .
and many,
how from... !! to
how well . why no
from out ? many ? . hi no you
! , best well well
why , , ...
and? , are !! very good
many out go to you !!
many no ... ... you ... ... . out
go of and do you
no of of . but are

This looks like they've picked the first word and the last sign of sentences in PM's or sumtin'.

[synch]

Subject: Sunglasses Bottle Software Teeth Passport Vampire PaintBrush.

[abcdefz]

Hi,

Present unforgettablle night to your belovved one,
immagine yourseelf as a Macho!
http://l59cmlnwv03pw59.blogspot.com

On the field, hath fallen in the battle struck ever fall
in love i reckon. No i'm not, he answered of my household.
many are the daughters of the deprived (of his kingdom and
possessions) by foul glowing fire, during the sleep of a
dangerous who had begun to work for wages at the age of
bioaheiaonns many hours then i am sorry to have kept you here
however, be seen by the aid of the srutis and still nothing
going up. Men said we're done for! But from their joining
in communion with mr. Whitefield itself. One that is a hero,
having dignity and communal life or amusement, save in heated
politics areaaaaegikl grandsire of it. The grandsire, having
called the laughing, i have great pleasure in announcing
believe that aesthetic emigrants took it with.

[b-grrrlie]

This one hadn't google's spam filter gotten: subject holmium gnomon

uracil puck crusty

beef gnomon poodle? cit, fluoride lorinda.
exemplify oliver upheaval derate crusty oliver, propyl
debra gondola derate polynomial neuronal.

neuronal crusty.