I don't believe you can teach it.

[Kid Presentable]

"You've either got it, or you don't".

Every time I hear this, I believe the person saying it HAS this IT, be it management skills, macking proficiency or the ability to operate cutlery.

I know I'm pretty decent with customer service, so much so that I know not only what to do and when, but I can tell when I'm not doing it properly as well. And as such, I believe that you can't teach something like that, you've either got it or you don't.

I sort of feel the same way about rapists and murderers. I don't rape or murder, and as such I don't see how any amount of rehabilitation can 'teach' somebody how to null these behaviours.

Then again, a psychiatrist can 'teach' a person to overcome self-designed boundaries. By the same token they can't 'teach' you how to overcome external boundaries like plain misfortune, you have to develop your own ability to judge and respond to these.

[abcdefz]

Those who can't do teach.

Those who can't teach teach gym.

[Kid Presentable]

Kid P has it. A-Z doesn't.
Can A-Z learn it, though?

[Hiebz]

Can A-Z learn it, though?

and if he fails to learn it, does he then try to imitate it?

[abcdefz]

No need to imitate herpes, but thanks. (y)

[Kid Presentable]

No need to imitate herpes, but thanks. (y)
I know, you've clearly got the whole 'Philadelphia' thang happening anyways.(y)

[abcdefz]

I know, you've clearly got the whole 'Philadelphia' thang happening anyways.(y)



...I'm a Hollywood liberal apologia? That's not very nice.

[Kid Presentable]

Anyway, I'm over the whole 'Go into thread and make fun of someone' thing, I want to know about skills you believe can or can't be taught. And what makes the teachers of unteachable skills seem salient to those in need of said skills?

I have been taught that getting tangled up in stupid internet arguments is pointless. But did I teach myself, by reviewing the pointlessness of my peer's replies, and then applying it to myself? If so, then that person taught me, or did I just have it in me?

Men's Magazines promise to make you a better lover. That can be taught, but ultimately becomes pointless in the long run. It's great how seasonally they will run the top 10 cunnilingus do's and don'ts. Number one:If a head pops out, run.

You can impress a lady between the sheets for a while, but after the first time you guys go to sleep without doing it, you're gonna realize somebody should have taught you how to behave in a relationship. And that, I believe cannot be taught. You either have it or you don't.

[abcdefz]

Anyway, I'm over the whole 'Go into thread and make fun of someone' thing, I want to know about skills you believe can or can't be taught. And what makes the teachers of unteachable skills seem salient to those in need of said skills?

I have been taught that getting tangled up in stupid internet arguments is pointless. But did I teach myself, by reviewing the pointlessness of my peer's replies, and then applying it to myself? If so, then that person taught me, or did I just have it in me?

Men's Magazines promise to make you a better lover. That can be taught, but ultimately becomes pointless in the long run. It's great how seasonally they will run the top 10 cunnilingus do's and don'ts. Number one:If a head pops out, run.

You can impress a lady between the sheets for a while, but after the first time you guys go to sleep without doing it, you're gonna realize somebody should have taught you how to behave in a relationship. And that, I believe cannot be taught. You either have it or you don't.



I think most anything can be taught. Relationship stuff can definitely be taught.

Basically, anyone with basic mental/motor skills can do about anything if that's their priority. Most of us, when we say "I just can't do this" are giving up rather than having a eureka moment.

[Kid Presentable]

I think most anything can be taught. Relationship stuff can definitely be taught.

Basically, anyone with basic mental/motor skills can do about anything if that's their priority. Most of us, when we say "I just can't do this" are giving up rather than having a eureka moment.

Rereading what I wrote, I tend to agree with you. But then some things aren't fixed skills either. A relationship is subject to a timeline, so you can be tought how to make a relationship work for a matter of years, but eventually you may run out of gusto.

About 'Eureka' moments, I wish I could recall mine, becuase I had one recently. Is it similar to an epiphany? I just sort of realised yesterday that I was doing something, and thinking "Damn, two weeks ago I thought this was impossible!" (And no, it wasn't taking a shit).

I'm interested in the idea that a person can try for years to become something and get there, and find that they have no ability for it beyond what training allowed them. Or people who decide on career changes from academic field to practical fields,like Peter in Office Space. How could he last in a labouring job? He didn't seem to have it in him. Admittedly, he did learn the lesson of hard work.:confused:

[Kid Presentable]

My son's Tae Kwon-Do instructor says that Noah has "it" when it comes to fighting. A kid at his school found this out the hard way.:D
Is it eerie to know that there is an 'it' in your son you can't take any credit for?

(not a poorly judged play on words)

[abcdefz]

I think that a person with no gift for a certain thing can still doggedly pursue competence. You may never play the piano like Horovitz, but you can learn the motor skills and reading skills to still be passable, if you just don't give up.

There are mental and physical limitations to things -- it probably IS impossible for me, at this age, to become a champion baseball player, no matter how hard I try -- but I can approximate that kind of achievement in local leagues, you know?

[Kid Presentable]

There are mental and physical limitations to things -- it probably IS impossible for me, at this age, to become a champion baseball player, no matter how hard I try -- but I can approximate that kind of achievement in local leagues, you know?

Would somebody teach you?

[marsdaddy]

Things that can't be taught --
athletic ability
musical prodigy
artistic expression

Most anything else can. Even in terms of the above, people can become "good" at something, but not necessarily have an "it" factor.

Some of the exciting challanges of life include figuring out who you are, what you want to do, and what you're good at.

[abcdefz]

Would somebody teach you?



A coach, presumably. Or a trainer.

In short: a don't think you can teach someone to be a genius, but you can help them become competent.

[Kid Presentable]

Things that can't be taught --
athletic ability
musical prodigy
artistic expression

Most anything else can. Even in terms of the above, people can become "good" at something, but not necessarily have an "it" factor.

Some of the exciting challanges of life include figuring out who you are, what you want to do, and what you're good at.

I like that. But I wonder if the greater point isn't that we're being taught what we're good at, but rather that we're being conditioned to learn. Maybe that adaptability is inherent in all of us, if we are taught to 'learn' it.

And maybe I'm talking out of my ass.

Although, you can't teach a person to be shy.

[Lex Diamonds]

You either have it or you don't. You're just born with it.

I don't understand why that is a good thing. Surely a skill that has been perfected and worked on is better? These phrases just remind me of genetic birth defects like Downs syndrome. :(

[abcdefz]

Although, you can't teach a person to be shy.


Sure can.

[Kid Presentable]

You either have it or you don't. You're just born with it.

I don't understand why that is a good thing. Surely a skill that has been perfected and worked on is better? These phrases just remind me of genetic birth defects like Downs syndrome. :(

I was trying to think of ways to make barmaids work faster. Sure, one can release gas near them, and they will move quickly TO ANOTHER PLACE, but that is not applicable in the instance of a busy pub.

So I thought maybe these girls can't be taught. Maybe they just weren't raised that way, or don't live in a world like that.

[Kid Presentable]

Sure can.

You mean by abusing them? Or teaching them to ACT shy?

[enree erzweglle]

I'm interested in the idea that a person can try for years to become something and get there, and find that they have no ability for it beyond what training allowed them.I think most people can learn most things, but master most things--that's different.

For some people, some things come easily. I've got friends who "get" and retain the most complex math and science imaginable. They get it at a fine granularity and the "getting" wasn't and isn't a struggle. Same with music--there is an innate-seeming tendency with them to be able to hear a piece and reproduce it nearly note-for-note; they can switch among several instruments and master each one. Often, they improve on pieces and they can do this just after a hearing or two and it's amazing to watch them do this.

To them, these are ways to be. These friends don't at all recognize these things as gifts. Some of them, in fact, assume that it's something that everyone can be and do, and that if a person struggles in those fields (maths/science) it's for lack of application or conviction. (And that attitude, to me, suggests that they do NOT have a gift of empathy.)

That music thing is something that I might learn, given a long stretch of time, but I *know* that it's not a gift for me. Same with complex science--I can and have learned a lot of it, but I have to work hard at it and retention is a problem, so it's challenging for me to build on those concepts over time unless I immerse myself in it regularly. On the other hand, my friends ^^^ can go weeks and months and years without thinking twice of a Hawking-like concept and, like flipping a switch, they can put themsevles back into that frame of thought without effort. That, to me, suggests that a lot of this is more than just something involving adaptability and process.

[abcdefz]

You mean by abusing them?



Yeah -- I was thinking of the whipped dog syndrome.

[Kid Presentable]

Yeah -- I was thinking of the whipped dog syndrome.
That's not teaching them anything, they have a choice of responses. They can stand up and fight. I venture that they must have it in them to be shy.

Enree, the music thing. I feel I had a gift for music I squandered. I would love dearly to pick it up again someday. I might buy a guitar after reading your post.

[hpdrifter]

To me there are several.

Dressing well and doing hair and makeup: some people just can, but it can't be taught.

Also drawing.

[instigator7022]

You can't teach it. Everything is within.

[Freebasser]

I taught myself how to be good at art and music.

NOW YOU CAN TOO!

[DapperDiverge]

true... so true...

it's like when u see those kids that look like they're really stupid and say dumb, weird things and they happen to be geniuses...

i'm definately not good with people... i like working behind the scenes

i wonder if i have a talent untapped?? i wonder what it could be?? just thinking about it is making me anxious!!

could i be good at repairs?? or writing?? or cooking?? perhaps my low self-esteem is keeping me from my gifts... and i wanna open some now!! they've collected enough dust!

[Freebasser]

No. You're shit at everything.

[DapperDiverge]

No. You're shit at everything.


i believe you're gifted... and am touched that you're touched... in the head!!:D

[Freebasser]

You have passed the test.

[DapperDiverge]

LOL's very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, .......VERY sarcastically

[Freebasser]

Lots Of Love to you too.