Make up

[Echewta]

your best Sarky Devotchka story.

Go!

[Qdrop]

so this guy keeps coming to my apartment all the time. he's like cort's kinda old boyfriend, but they were never really together, just making out a lot and stuff...but he totally liked her ALOT, and cort kinda did...but then she met this other guy, and it got wierd.
but, yeah anyway...he's back to hanging around again...and i thought he still like cort....but like, the other night, we were in the kitchen alone..and he was really flirting with me, and making all these super awesome pop-culture bohemian referances about eVERYTHING...and it was so cute...
and we kissed.

oh god.

i feel bad. cause i don't know if cort likes him...even though she is still seeing that other guy, kinda.

so i'm having lunch with him tomorrow, but i'm bring him to this place that has this real cute waiter that i like to flirt with...and i'm gonna flirt with him in front of this guy...just to see if he gets jealous...
and if he does, i'll get all made and storm off in public....and if he chases me down, i'll stop and make out with him....
and then say "i can't do this to cort"...
yeah...
i'm just crazy...
sigh.
kitten are so cute. oMG!

[zorra_chiflada]

^that's really good, i actually thought it was sarky for a while.

[b i o n i c]

you do one echewta

[King of Rock $]

This has the potential to be somewhat humorous, if anyone actually feels like going through that whole process of making up a story and typing it out.

[abcdefz]

I made out in the back of a conversion van listening to check your head

ha ha. After dancing to 80's music at Neo (this gothy sort of club). I went with this guy I know in my friend's band and his friend. We drove there in the "tour van". The guy kissed me innocently on the lips on the dance floor and then came back and said, "wow, that was nice", so then we started kissing every few minutes. He was like, "I wish we could make out for real" and then got the idea to make out in the van because it would be hilarious.

anyway, he was saying all sorts of stuff about how he always thought I was hot, and thought about kissing me and how I'm a great kisser. he told me 10 times that my part in the music video he made was his favorite. and when we got back to his place, he was telling his roommates that I look so beautiful in the video, etc. etc. and the one guy was like, "I know dude, you've said that like 50 times!"

he sleeps on a couch in an apartment about the size of my living room. he's 32. he said "sorry my life is like this". ha ha. and the other boys were like, "why are you hanging out with us poor boys? you should be hanging out with dentists or something, guys who can buy you more things than beer." and I was like, "oh, I don't know, it's more fun this way".

anyway, we fooled around on the couch and he is a very talented fellow. and he has a nipple ring! ha! he was acting like he liked me a lot, and I just kept giggling. he was saying stuff like, "you're so beautiful, I love your laugh", but I think he was just trying to get me to have sex with him. I hope. and I didn't. I really hope he doesn't like me, I was thinking of nathan the whole time.

in the morning I said "I gotta go dude" and he offered to walk me to the train, but I told him to go back to sleep (because please, I needed to call cort and who needs 5 blocks of awkwardness?) so we hugged and said, "that was fun" and laughed.

I feel dirty. but it was a lovely time as a whole.

Copyright © 2006 Sarky D

[Bob]

This has the potential to be somewhat humorous, if anyone actually feels like going through that whole process of making up a story and typing it out.

yeah, what kind of loser has the time for....oh, sorry

[ciaobellaOX]

I have been avoiding posting about this because I don't want it to be true. Denial has always worked for me with serious issues. I was always taught in school that you can't get pregnant through kissing, but I'm kind of freaking out. I'm late and I'm too terrified to actually go buy a pregnancy test. I met this guy about 3 weeks back and it didn't mean anything at all. The make-out session barely lasted 7 minutes and he wasn't really that cute, so why would I ever think that anything would happen, you know? He wasn't even cute enough to post on here about. I really need to stop drinking when my friends are out of town. When he finally came, getting pregnant was the last thing I thought would happen. But, we were just kissing, so I don't know. iIve been thinking about emailing him, just to forewarn him in case the test is positive, but I'm not even sure he gave me the right email address. I gave him a fake address, so I should expect the same. I just got these really cute shirts too the other day at this vintage Goodwill. I'll be lucky if I can fit into them by the end of summer. I should've scrubbed my tongue that night when I got home. Cort's going to kill me.

[bigblu89]

I've been waiting for a thread like this.

I don't know if I can top Q's story though.

[b i o n i c]

Copyright © 2006 Sarky D

haha



this thread is more amusing than the truth

[jlees_mcsd]

I do not know Sarky good enough to act like I am telling a story that belongs not to me but from reading all the other posts I kinda think there is just too much kissing going on. Chapstick thanks you Sarky.

[Sarky Devotchka]

IMITATION IS THE SINCEREST FORM OF FLATTERY

[Sarky Devotchka]

^that's really good, i actually thought it was sarky for a while.

how rude!

[Sarky Devotchka]

I made out in the back of a conversion van listening to check your head

ha ha. After dancing to 80's music at Neo (this gothy sort of club). I went with this guy I know in my friend's band and his friend. We drove there in the "tour van". The guy kissed me innocently on the lips on the dance floor and then came back and said, "wow, that was nice", so then we started kissing every few minutes. He was like, "I wish we could make out for real" and then got the idea to make out in the van because it would be hilarious.

anyway, he was saying all sorts of stuff about how he always thought I was hot, and thought about kissing me and how I'm a great kisser. he told me 10 times that my part in the music video he made was his favorite. and when we got back to his place, he was telling his roommates that I look so beautiful in the video, etc. etc. and the one guy was like, "I know dude, you've said that like 50 times!"

he sleeps on a couch in an apartment about the size of my living room. he's 32. he said "sorry my life is like this". ha ha. and the other boys were like, "why are you hanging out with us poor boys? you should be hanging out with dentists or something, guys who can buy you more things than beer." and I was like, "oh, I don't know, it's more fun this way".

anyway, we fooled around on the couch and he is a very talented fellow. and he has a nipple ring! ha! he was acting like he liked me a lot, and I just kept giggling. he was saying stuff like, "you're so beautiful, I love your laugh", but I think he was just trying to get me to have sex with him. I hope. and I didn't. I really hope he doesn't like me, I was thinking of nathan the whole time.

in the morning I said "I gotta go dude" and he offered to walk me to the train, but I told him to go back to sleep (because please, I needed to call cort and who needs 5 blocks of awkwardness?) so we hugged and said, "that was fun" and laughed.

I feel dirty. but it was a lovely time as a whole.

Copyright © 2006 Sarky D


wow, I hate me. really, if that were someone else, my eyes would be rolling so hard, they'd fall out of my head. at least these little exercises teach me how not to write...for when I write my book. coming in 2009 to a bookstore near you.

[b i o n i c]

so this guy keeps coming to my apartment all the time. he's like cort's kinda old boyfriend, but they were never really together, just making out a lot and stuff...but he totally liked her ALOT, and cort kinda did...but then she met this other guy, and it got wierd.
but, yeah anyway...he's back to hanging around again...and i thought he still like cort....but like, the other night, we were in the kitchen alone..and he was really flirting with me, and making all these super awesome pop-culture bohemian referances about eVERYTHING...and it was so cute...
and we kissed.

oh god.

i feel bad. cause i don't know if cort likes him...even though she is still seeing that other guy, kinda.

so i'm having lunch with him tomorrow, but i'm bring him to this place that has this real cute waiter that i like to flirt with...and i'm gonna flirt with him in front of this guy...just to see if he gets jealous...
and if he does, i'll get all made and storm off in public....and if he chases me down, i'll stop and make out with him....
and then say "i can't do this to cort"...
yeah...
i'm just crazy...
sigh.
kitten are so cute. oMG!


HAHA(y)

[marsdaddy]

so the band where I'm sortof dating the lead singer and sound engineer played Sat night. I played the triangle. After, this really gross, drunk guy kept telling me that was the best, "polygon" he's ever heard. So we made out. The gross part is he got a boner when I touched his weiner.

[g-mile7]

wow, I hate me. really, if that were someone else, my eyes would be rolling so hard, they'd fall out of my head. at least these little exercises teach me how not to write...for when I write my book. coming in 2009 to a bookstore near you.


I cant wait.

[b i o n i c]

wow, I hate me. really, if that were someone else, my eyes would be rolling so hard, they'd fall out of my head. at least these little exercises teach me how not to write...for when I write my book. coming in 2009 to a bookstore near you.


you can catch advance excerpts in the June 2009 issue of Seventeen

[Echewta]

:)

[Bitchamachacha]

So Cort was giving some guy a lap dance at this shitty bar down the street and was all like, "Damn, dude! It smells like a cat shat in your mouth", and he said, "so if a cat has bad breath does that mean a person shat in its mouth?" She was so lost, but her story made me think about life in general and how it stinks like cat poo. The world is one huge litter box and it's only normal to get drunk and puke all over it, then roll around in it and go to a show smelling worse than the band. Oh, and I made out with some guy in a band last night. His breath was actually pretty nice.

[Freebasser]

So Cort threw this party Saturday night and my friend Bort's band was playing (the lead singer was really hot - remind me to ask him out). Anyway, I was all about trying to chat up this girl's boyfriend by daring him to read the cooking instructions on a packet of spaghetti when Cort's friend Chad said Brad and Chase were splitting up. I was right in there - I'd had the hotzz for Brad ever since he'd written me a poem entitled "cat loaves" and told me that I was the only one for him. I can't figure out why they split up - they were such a cute couple. Maybe it was because I touched Brad's taint in the minivan, I don't know. Regardless, we all decided that enough was enough and that this was an evening for celebration. I got wasted off a bottle of red wine that Aaaaron (he insists there are that many As - god he's hot) brought and made out with a window. I got Chantel's cousin's boyfriend's bandmate's friend's number and we decided to hook up whenever his girlfriend is out of town. I can't wait!

[Sarky Devotchka]

So Cort threw this party Saturday night and my friend Bort's band was playing (the lead singer was really hot - remind me to ask him out). Anyway, I was all about trying to chat up this girl's boyfriend by daring him to read the cooking instructions on a packet of spaghetti when Cort's friend Chad said Brad and Chase were splitting up. I was right in there - I'd had the hotzz for Brad ever since he'd written me a poem entitled "cat loaves" and told me that I was the only one for him. I can't figure out why they split up - they were such a cute couple. Maybe it was because I touched Brad's taint in the minivan, I don't know. Regardless, we all decided that enough was enough and that this was an evening for celebration. I got wasted off a bottle of red wine that Aaaaron (he insists there are that many As - god he's hot) brought and made out with a window. I got Chantel's cousin's boyfriend's bandmate's friend's number and we decided to hook up whenever his girlfriend is out of town. I can't wait!


lol

[icy manipulator]

how the fuck can a little tube of Lancome lip gloss cost $42 ffs?! i'd fucking hate to be a chick spending god only knows how much on make up and shit

[prezl]

Make up into da face or make up of a Company suckz. That is just only all for bling bling $$$.

[ampm]

heiress' unkept look + dandy's afterschool special life = sarky

[Sarky Devotchka]

unkempt. heiress isn't unkempt, she's just canadian.

[Sarky Devotchka]

p.s.

farts+old bucket=ampm

[prezl]

Whatz this?