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View Full Version : Raccoons - Someday they will take over the world

skra75
08-01-2006, 07:12 AM
So, last night my garbage can was open, and the fat local Raccoon apparently had his dinner.

Garbage was everywhere. Before work, I ran aorund and rounded up all the trash, and I got to thinking how organized it was. The Raccoon was looking for specific things, like corn and bits of bread.

A while ago (maybe 4 years ago) I posted a thread on here about my theory about Raccoons. I think that long after the human race is dead and gone (nuclear holocaust, worldwide plague, accidental zombie epidemic, etc) Raccoons will live on and eventually evolve into a race of upright, civilized beings and develop their own culture, technology, and arts.

Discuss.
kaiser soze
08-01-2006, 07:19 AM
raccoons are fucking great

my mom feeds em at her house, they'll take the food right out of our hands, I pet em. I have no fear of rabies, lyme disease, nor avian flu
skra75
08-01-2006, 09:13 AM
what?:confused:
Lex Diamonds
08-01-2006, 09:15 AM
Nah man, raccoons can't shoot guns.
ScarySquirrel
08-01-2006, 09:19 AM
I watched this special once on raccoons. They're super smart and stuff... plus I think they're kind of fun to look at. They kind of look like little furry people to me.

I want a pet raccoon.
skra75
08-01-2006, 09:19 AM
hear me out, there won't BE guns when they rule the world. They'll make a little museaum and put them in it and wonder what they were used for.

Raccoons would probably fashion some kind of elaborate knives and shit anyways. They're too cool to shoot, they'd fight in a style that resembled Capoeira.

kapow! (http://static.flickr.com/26/41450626_76c46dfa42.jpg)
Dorothy Wood
08-01-2006, 10:03 AM
one time when I was camping, some baby raccoons broke into the kitchen tent and took some apples, and they washed them in the dish pan! omg! then they took some muffins and ran up a tree. then the momma was yelling from the treed area, "get back to the woods! grrrr! cacacacaca!" and the babies were looking at us and then the fat one dropped his muffin and he kept looking at it, then looking at us, trying to decided whether or not to go down and get it and his brothers were like, "no, fatty, don't!", but he came down and grabbed it and ran back up the tree.

then we figured we'd better stop shining flashlights on them and let them go back to their momma. too bad nobody had a video camera. AFV baby!