ladies first?

[na§tee]

yesterday some one - a man - opened a door for me.

i was very surprised at this as i can't remember it happening for a longlonglong time. and it wasn't the fact that he just opened the door for me, he was quite some distance behind me and went running up so he could get to the door before me, and open it.

this got me thinking about "manners" and the whole treating ladies like ladies thing. do people actually do this anymore? what are your experiences of it?
on both sides of teh sexual divide.

i've never had a chair pulled for me to sit on, or many doors opened for me, and certainly wouldn't insist it, but i must admit it felt nice just for someone who i didn't know to be, you know, jovial and pleasant by making my day a little brighter and easier. (just how "easier" it is by being spared the tasking job of opening a door yourself is beside the point!)

i certainly don't think i should get any special treatment on the basis of being a girl, but i'm just saying i think a bit of this sort of behaviour on both the male and female sides is sometimes missing in this society. it would be great to see more of it. but not in a patronising way.

what say you?

[Bob]

he probably just wanted to have sex with you

[mickill]

I'm kinda a gentleman, see. I pull out chairs for wimmins to sit on, I help the elderly with their groceries, I'm respectful etc. But I open doors for women, men and the Scottish alike.

[HEIRESS]

the occurance of such treatment depends on what Im wearing and how many days ago I last washed my hair

[hpdrifter]

Yeah, I've had that happen before. It always makes me feel all delicate and willowy. Like a lady. Its nice.

I think its good, it hearkens back to something idyllic and gentle, to me at least. If it makes me feel good and makes a man feel like a gentleman, even for a fleeting second, its a good thing. Its strange how momentary interactions with strangers can swing your mood one way or the other.

[jackrock]

I hold the door open for anyone.

[abcdefz]

I open doors for anyone if they're somewhat close behind me -- like, they're not going to feel obligated to break into a run because I'm holding the door.

On a date, or if I'm with a much older, unescorted woman -- yeah, I'll grab the chair.

It's funny to me, though, how many people are suspicious if you open a door for them. And the thing where they sort of skulk past and put their hand out as if you're going to close the door on them midway through kinda bugs me. So I open the door, and then look down so they can see that I'm not only holding the door open, but it's also propped against my foot -- and that seems to help.

Frankly, it's shocking to me that it's shocking to other people when you exhibit common courtesy.

[Rock]

I hold the door open for anyone.
"

that is, if they are within a certain distance from me.

i rarely pull the seat out for a girl.

but i always wipe my face when i see a girl looking for somewhere to sit in hopes that they will know what im sayin. ya know what im sayin?

[jennyb]

I hold the door open for anyone.

Me too jackrock, I like your response! (y)

I have a question... I always feel thankful when a 'gentleman' opens the door for me, often times at the coffee shop I'm goin into, however, so I feel like I should let him in line in front of me though cuz technically he was there first. Often times the guy's like no it's aight, and I feel weird. But the door opening doesn't make me feel weird, that's cool.

I actually held the door open for this bitch who didn't even make eye contact with me much less say thank you, so I got in her face and said "YOU'RE WELCOME"! It felt good to call her out. I was offended.

[enree erzweglle]

We have four-way stop signs here (I know that some parts of the world don't and don't know how they work) but for the most part here in the U.S. most people understand the ordering system--who gets to go next--at a four-way stop sign.

So, say a guy on your right has right of way because he got to the intersection first--if he's an older guy and if you're a woman, the chances (at least here) are pretty huge that he absolutely won't go when he's supposed to go (which is before you). He'll usually give you a no-eye-contact gesture and when you don't go, he'll look and then nod and gesture and if you still don't go, he'll motion more pointedly and then eventually, he'll gesture angrily--negating all of that good stuff he was going for by being chivalrous in the first place. He'll do these things until you go before him, out of order, or until he storms off usually being angry and probably calling me a bad name. Which I've always thought as some sort of perversion of car-manners for older guys.

[abcdefz]

I have a question... I always feel thankful when a 'gentleman' opens the door for me, often times at the coffee shop I'm goin into, however, so I feel like I should let him in line in front of me though cuz technically he was there first. Often times the guy's like no it's aight, and I feel weird. But the door opening doesn't make me feel weird, that's cool.




I think opening the door in and of itself is an invitation to go first. If someone insists I get ahead of them in line, I'll do it, though -- if I can be gracious, other people gotta be able to do that, too.




I actually held the door open for this bitch who didn't even make eye contact with me much less say thank you, so I got in her face and said "YOU'RE WELCOME"! It felt good to call her out. I was offended.



I made my peace with this a while ago, and it's rarely broken: holding the door open is a gift; if someone doesn't want to thank me, that's on them already and not me. Also, they might be embarassed and not know what to say, even though I kinda figure it's more of a "the world is my private space" kinda vibe we've cultivated, like with cell phones.

[jackrock]

that is, if they are within a certain distance from me.


Same, but my judgement on distance can improve. Example: If someone is too far, I'll hesitate and stand waiting, I don't want to hold it open, realize that they are too far away, and shut the door on their face (even though they are far). I did it once and it made me feel like a jerk. So if a person is 5 blocks away, I hold the door open for 1 second, I have to go the distance.

[abcdefz]

A couple of weeks ago, a woman on an electric cart was coming up behind me as I entered a bookstore. I held the door open, and she and her companion were both, all: "Thanks you so much! Nobody EVER does that!!!" and I was kinda thinking, you've got to be kidding, right?

Funny enough, they were exiting just before I did, and I saw someone holding the door open for them. They were saying something, but I don't know what it was, so I started wondering if they were being patronizing, assuming door-openers were being patronizing.

[miss soul fire]

My boyfriend does that to me. I'm not very used to it because I was the one who used to open doors for people. Hihihihihi.:D

[miss soul fire]

A couple of weeks ago, a woman on an electric cart was coming up behind me as I entered a bookstore. I held the door open, and she and her companion were both, all: "Thanks you so much! Nobody EVER does that!!!" and I was kinda thinking, you've got to be kidding, right?

Funny enough, they were exiting just before I did, and I saw someone holding the door open for them. They were saying something, but I don't know what it was, so I started wondering if they were being patronizing, assuming door-openers were being patronizing.
Awwwww...:o

[Dorothy Wood]

I like it when men let you on the bus first. that's pretty cool.

[TurdBerglar]

ladies and especially mothers are always first. unless they are cunts

[monkey]

the bf is really nice about opening doors for me and getting my seat if we're out. but for the most part, im so used to doing it myself that sometimes, i pre-empt and just do it myself. as for holding doors open, i always hold the door open for someone behind me, it's just common courtesy.

[Lyman Zerga]

ladies and especially mothers are always first. unless they have cunts




well yeah gentlemen / good manners = turn on for me


im rawking the good manners shit like no one else

[skra75]

I always open doors for people. men or women, and especially little kids or old folks.
Just the way I was raised, I'm a good Midwest boy.

[yeah_whatever]

i'm from the south and we all get into arguements over who holds the door open for whom. polite aurguements, though, mind you. i'm serious. it goes down like this:

"here let me get that door for you"

"oh no, let me get the door for you"

"oh no, i insist, let me get the door for you"

ect, ect, ect...

[ggirlballa]

hahaha

when i read this it said:D

Ladies First?
yeah_whatever

[Drederick Tatum]

perhaps he'd had enough of the back and wanted to check out the front.

[zorra_chiflada]

doesn't happen to me. i think you have to act like a lady or someshit.

[Documad]

I have a question... I always feel thankful when a 'gentleman' opens the door for me, often times at the coffee shop I'm goin into, however, so I feel like I should let him in line in front of me though cuz technically he was there first. Often times the guy's like no it's aight, and I feel weird.
Oh, yes, that's awkward. He should get to go first in line, so I sometimes pretend to have a look at the new mugs they're selling or at the headlines in the newspaper and THEN I slip into line behind him. :p

I think it's a matter of where you live. Men and women hold doors open for each other here all the time. I always say thank you. But don't hold the door for me if I'm ten feet behind -- I don't want to feel like I have to run for it. :rolleyes:

[Kid Presentable]

I always insist ladies go through doors first, pull out a seat for the other half when we dine out, hell I even serve ladies their drinks first in a round when I work at the bar.

Gotta show some respect to the ladies.

[Pres Zount]

doesn't happen to me. i think you have to act like a lady or someshit.

:mad:

Ok I wont do anything anymore.

[Gareth]

roses are red some diamonds are blue chivalry is dead but you're still kind of cute

[Dorothy Wood]

:mad:

Ok I wont do anything anymore.


awwww, shit.

[jennyb]

:mad:

Ok I wont do anything anymore.

Zorra + Zount = adorable

[Justin]

i was going into the office building today and I had already entered the building, but i saw a woman coming out of the elevator heading towards the door, so i decided to open the door for her. She said "thanks, nice tie"

Im always doing stuff like this. In fact, anytime I open a door I always glance behind me to make sure the door wont close in someones face.


Im a good guy(y)

[Dorothy Wood]

Zorra + Zount = adorable


seriously, the cutest tasmanians in history. wait, they live in tasmania right? or was that just a dream I had?

[Loppfessor]

I open doors, pull out chairs, stand up when a female leaves the table the whole 9...It's all habit now

[Pres Zount]

Not only are we the cutest tasmanians, but we are the last.

Tasmania was wiped out in a nuclear holocaust in 1992. It was on the news, but nobody cared.

[jennyb]

Not only are we the cutest tasmanians, but we are the last.

Tasmania was wiped out in a nuclear holocaust in 1992. It was on the news, but nobody cared.

yes you are cute... let's not get carried away now :rolleyes:

[Pres Zount]

Serious man

[ms.peachy]

In general I reckon it just comes down to, some people have manners and some don't, regardless of whether they are dealing with a man or a woman. I did hoewevver notice a huge difference when I was pregnant, in that many more people were inclined to do things like hold a door open, let me get onto the bus first, let me ahead of them in line at the supermarket if I had only a few items, etc.

[Kid Presentable]

In general I reckon it just comes down to, some people have manners and some don't, regardless of whether they are dealing with a man or a woman. I did hoewevver notice a huge difference when I was pregnant, in that many more people were inclined to do things like hold a door open, let me get onto the bus first, let me ahead of them in line at the supermarket if I had only a few items, etc.
Is that your tit?

[ms.peachy]

Some of it.

[zorra_chiflada]

:mad:

Ok I wont do anything anymore.

pah, you never did! don't lie in front of all these people! :mad:

[trailerprincess]

I like to think I have good manners, and do help old people with their luggage and always give pregnant/old people my seat on trains/buses etc. As a girl, I really appreciate good manners, the door holding etc is very nice and earns definite brownie points.

When I was working in Asia, I was shocked that no one gave up seats for the elderly on public transport.

[Kid Presentable]

pah, you never did! don't lie in front of all these people! :mad:
He told me. Then I talked about putting my feet up on the door in front of me whilst taking a shit.

[ms.peachy]

When I was working in Asia, I was shocked that no one gave up seats for the elderly on public transport.
I am surprised to hear that; I am under the impression that in general Eastern cultures are far more reverent of thier elders than in the West.

[Kid Presentable]

Some of it.
Looks like a larf.(y)

[trailerprincess]

I am surprised to hear that; I am under the impression that in general Eastern cultures are far more reverent of thier elders than in the West.

Me too!! I really thought that was the case too. But I used to get the bus from HK central to Stanley most weekends (binge sunbathing) and more often than not I would have to give up my seat for an elderly person whilst everyone else stared out of the window.

[Loppfessor]

Some of it.


Okay thanks I was going to ask but didn't want to be rude....interesting

[na§tee]

boob! boobs are great. breasts that actually produce milk are even better!
i wonder what it tastes like. actually, no. did anyone happen to see a documentary about a year back on women who keep on breastfeeding their kids basically all their lives? one was feeding a 15 year old, two younger ones, and sometimes - her husband! jesus, christ.
my mum used to say that breastfeeding felt like pushing little grains of broken glass through her nipples. immajus'saying! that was with my brother, though. i was super premature and had to be fed with machines :/
high fives for you, peachy! (y) ladies first indeed!

[abcdefz]

I like it when men let you on the bus first. that's pretty cool.



The other half of the story is that I often let everybody else board the bus first so that I can pick a seat not next to stinky, mouth-breather, hacking-cold-spreader, or funky dude who's been looking at me funny. :)

[Lyman Zerga]

boob! boobs are great. breasts that actually produce milk are even better!
i wonder what it tastes like. actually, no. did anyone happen to see a documentary about a year back on women who keep on breastfeeding their kids basically all their lives? one was feeding a 15 year old, two younger ones, and sometimes - her husband! jesus, christ.


so very wrong
i already cringe when i see a mother feeding her 3-4 year old kid

i dont mind drinking milk that comes from animals (im so fucking special) but i would never try my or any others mother milk


p.s. i like your avatar, ms peachy

[fucktopgirl]

I think it should be people first, so anyone should be gentle and have good manners!


Why we should, LAdies, have more people dusting the floor in front of us, open door, pulling the chair and blablablabla...
THis is just some middle age bullshit that make no sense.
I am really intrigue to know where this "ladie first " thing root from. Must be from the rich royalty , certainly not from the poor peolple who had trouble putting bread on their plate.

[na§tee]

so very wrong
(lb) uh, i didn't express any great encouragement of breast feeding 3-4 year olds - if anything, the "jesus, christ!" factor of my response denoted disgust, no? do you think that i really found it cute that this woman was breastfeeding a 15 year old and her husband??!!! it was a progression from my initial "breastfeeding is awesome when, you know, you're a baby!" comment.

on another note, i am very impressed at the gentlemanly ways of many of the boarders!

[venusvenus123]

I am surprised to hear that; I am under the impression that in general Eastern cultures are far more reverent of thier elders than in the West.
i gave up my seat on the subway for an older lady in tokyo. she was so incredibly grateful and so sweet... that i haven't forgotten it to this day!

[Lyman Zerga]

(lb) uh, i didn't express any great encouragement of breast feeding 3-4 year olds - if anything, the "jesus, christ!" factor of my response denoted disgust, no? do you think that i really found it cute that this woman was breastfeeding a 15 year old and her husband??!!! it was a progression from my initial "breastfeeding is awesome when, you know, you're a baby!" comment.


i never said you find it cute or get turned on from it

didnt mean your post was very wrong
but breastfeeding anything older than a baby is

[like2_drink]

this got me thinking about "manners" and the whole treating ladies like ladies thing. do people actually do this anymore? what are your experiences of it?
on both sides of teh sexual divide.


i always do, just the right thing to do. but i hear alot of people in bigger cities and such don't bother with it? think your crazy if you ask them for the time and pepper spray is always on guard:confused:

i don't look forward to cities.

[Kid Presentable]

I think women breastfeeding in public is in the same vein as urinating.

[abcdefz]

I think women breastfeeding in public is in the same vein as urinating.



..women should turn toward the nearest tree or alleyway?

[Lex Diamonds]

I get doors for girls, give 'em my top if they're cold, walk them home from places, and all that shit if I'm looking to tap it. (y)

[Planetary]

if I'm looking to tap it. (y)
lol

[Lex Diamonds]

"Oh Paddy you're such a tease!"

;) (y)

[QueenAdrock]

I'm polite and shit, it's how I was brought up. If someone's behind me, I'll keep the door open for them. If someone's looking like they'll get on the elevator, I'll hold those doors, too. If a pregnant or old lady is on the metro, I'll let them have my seat and I'll stand. You wouldn't believe the amount of people who AREN'T like that. Especially on the metro. I saw some dude take up TWO seats, one for him and one for his bag, and when a little old lady came on, he saw her and immediately stared at his feet. I offered her my seat, and wanted to yell at him I'M CHIVALROUS AND I DON'T EVEN HAVE BALLS! I mean, all he had to do was SHIFT his BAG, and he didn't even do that. Some people, man.

Either way, I've had the door held open for me a handful of times. For every cretin there is around here, there's also a very sweet person. You just gotta ignore the jerks.

[Kid Presentable]

..women should turn toward the nearest tree or alleyway?
Yeah go on. And never have to 'drip dry'.

[FloorK]

I fell in love with a guy just because he always opened the door for me....

I love it when men do this! (y)

[Planetary]

"Oh Paddy you're such a tease!"

;) (y)

haha. steez

[beastieangel01]

do people actually do this anymore? what are your experiences of it?

it happens to me sometimes. A fair amount actually. I also go out of my way to open doors for others or hold them open, no matter what sex or age they are.

I just think common courtesy is nice.

It actually bugs me if a guy insists TOO much on doing the door opening/chair/blah blah thing. I knew one guy that would refuse to let me do any of it myself. It drove me nuts.

[ms.peachy]

So I noticed today, since I read this thread this morning, that actually all day I have dealt with a lot of very polite people. I took the baby to the pool and everywhere I went along the way there and back, everyone I came into contact with was really pretty nice, and opened doors for me and such (OK yes I have the stroller so that helps, but still.)

I think women breastfeeding in public is in the same vein as urinating.
How are they even vaguely comparable?

[Kid Presentable]

So I noticed today, since I read this thread this morning, that actually all day I have dealt with a lot of very polite people. I took the baby to the pool and everywhere I went along the way there and back, everyone I came into contact with was really pretty nice, and opened doors for me and such (OK yes I have the stroller so that helps, but still.)


How are they even vaguely comparable?
Do you breast-feed in public?

[g-mile7]

Women allowed the asshole guys 2 kill shivery. And as 4 myself shoot I write songs/poems 4 ladies as well as sing pulling chairs and opening doors was (and is) grade school 2 me

[Kid Presentable]

in my experience, the men who go out of their way to open doors for me are creepy ones who want something
That's a good argument for not doing it. I hate the thought of a woman interpreting my good nature as "I wanna play in yer pubes". And I know there's dudes out there who are only good to women in the hope of getting some.

[Kid Presentable]

if they're near the door anyways then that's cool or if my arms are holding other things and i can't open the door for myself then that's fine too.
I tend to look at the floor if I'm holding a door open for someone, because I sorta look like a rapist. That's kinda chivalrous of me, too.

[Kid Presentable]

but would you open doors for girls you weren't attracted to?

a lot of men wouldn't
Mate, I open doors for all sorts.

[g-mile7]

in my experience, the men who go out of their way to open doors for me are creepy ones who want something
Parnoia and stereotyping will get you nowhere Miss Thang

[ms.peachy]

Do you breast-feed in public?
If we're out and about and she's hungry, then yeah, it's just what needs to be done. It's not like I go out looking for the most publicly possible places to feed her, but when the kid's gotta eat, she's gotta eat.

[vickista]

yesterday some one - a man - opened a door for me.

i was very surprised at this as i can't remember it happening for a longlonglong time. and it wasn't the fact that he just opened the door for me, he was quite some distance behind me and went running up so he could get to the door before me, and open it.

this got me thinking about "manners" and the whole treating ladies like ladies thing. do people actually do this anymore? what are your experiences of it?

what say you?

no manners what so ever, unless they wanna get in your pants, but other than that no manners at all.

[Naterock]

i wud put the ladies first but they dont do it to me so why shud i?

i could be chivarous to women i just love respect and i need it as well as give it oyu know?

[venusvenus123]

I think women breastfeeding in public is in the same vein as urinating.
that's your problem.

[Drederick Tatum]

imagine if women urinated out of their boobs.

that'd be gross.

[trailerprincess]

my friend who is about to give birth any day now, told me that she had read that the sound of another baby crying can occasionally cause women to produce breast milk without any control. She was freaked by this

[Kid Presentable]

that's your problem.
Actually, it's your problem.

[QueenAdrock]

Well, urinating is something that has designated areas to do it at. I don't really see breastfeeding areas in malls, so if your baby's crying, what are you supposed to do?

However, when I have kids I'm going to at least get one of those smock thingees that covers the baby so no creepy guys are lookin' at my chest.(n)

[Bob]

imagine if women urinated out of their boobs.

that'd be gross.

there's an anime artist working on this as we speak, if it hasn't been done already (i bet it has)

[abcdefz]

I'm sure R. Crumb did this decades ago.

[Lyman Zerga]

people shouldnt smoke in closed public areas

now thats gross! and killing

[Lo_Lyfe]

yo i'm all about lookin at tits, even wit a little milk dribblez.