abcdefz
09-27-2006, 11:13 AM
So my co-worker was telling me about how her son (about 12-13 years old) came home and said a kid had called another kid a douchebag and "What's a douchebag?"
She said she explained how it was a nasty thing to call someone and then explained delicately what a douche is, etc., and the kid was a little freaked, etc.
I asked if it were a delicate thing to explain to a kid that saying some biological thing in a ceratin way could be nasty, but that the biological thing itself was nothing to be ashamed of, etc. (If that indeed were a "value" she hoped to get across.)
She said she didn't understand what I meant, so I went back to her example. I said, "So, you explained what a douche actually is for , right?" and she said yes, and I said "So how do you explain that 'douchebag' is nasty to call a person, but that 'douche' itself isn't some unspeakable thing?"
She said it was a nasty thing to call someone, and so I knew she still kind of wasn't getting it, so I said that a lot of guys aren't really raised to deal with the biology of ceratin male or female "events," so they kind of freak out when they occur, rather than just dealing with them as facts of life. She said she still didn't understand, so I offered as an example that, for instance, a lot of guys won't touch their women when they're menstruating, because they're taught -- overtly or by omission -- that it's so sick and gross, etc.
At that, my co-worker got a pretty flustered and said she'd never heard of such a thing, and she'd never heard that before from ANYONE. I said, yeah, it's not unusual, and that was the end of the conversation -- she was quickly out of the room and back to her desk.
I apologized later for "making her uncomfrtable," but I kind of thought it was weird -- she starts talking about a douchebag and douching, so I figure we're in "adult" territory, but I mention the menstrual cycle and that's over the line? I could see an argument that neither was appropriate, but it's just funny to me where people's squeamishness-lines are drawn.
She said she explained how it was a nasty thing to call someone and then explained delicately what a douche is, etc., and the kid was a little freaked, etc.
I asked if it were a delicate thing to explain to a kid that saying some biological thing in a ceratin way could be nasty, but that the biological thing itself was nothing to be ashamed of, etc. (If that indeed were a "value" she hoped to get across.)
She said she didn't understand what I meant, so I went back to her example. I said, "So, you explained what a douche actually is for , right?" and she said yes, and I said "So how do you explain that 'douchebag' is nasty to call a person, but that 'douche' itself isn't some unspeakable thing?"
She said it was a nasty thing to call someone, and so I knew she still kind of wasn't getting it, so I said that a lot of guys aren't really raised to deal with the biology of ceratin male or female "events," so they kind of freak out when they occur, rather than just dealing with them as facts of life. She said she still didn't understand, so I offered as an example that, for instance, a lot of guys won't touch their women when they're menstruating, because they're taught -- overtly or by omission -- that it's so sick and gross, etc.
At that, my co-worker got a pretty flustered and said she'd never heard of such a thing, and she'd never heard that before from ANYONE. I said, yeah, it's not unusual, and that was the end of the conversation -- she was quickly out of the room and back to her desk.
I apologized later for "making her uncomfrtable," but I kind of thought it was weird -- she starts talking about a douchebag and douching, so I figure we're in "adult" territory, but I mention the menstrual cycle and that's over the line? I could see an argument that neither was appropriate, but it's just funny to me where people's squeamishness-lines are drawn.