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Dorothy Wood
10-23-2006, 09:18 AM
a girl I went to middle school/high school with posted this on myspace. I puked a little in my mouth because she's always making sexy bulletins and talking about wanting to be a stripper. but she's real gross, think Miss Piggy with squinty eyes, facial moles and an orange spray tan.

feel free to fill this out for fun if you want and I'll forward it to her ;)

Booty Call Application

Body: Please fill out the below application if you want to be a booty call for this person.


Name: ___________________

Age: ____________________

Phone: (____) ____________

Occupation: ____________________

Height______ Weight______

Married(Y/N)__ Single(Y/N)___ Other_________

Sexual Orientation: __________

Do u like to masturbate?: __________________

Do you like phone sex?: _________________

How often do u wanna have sex?(check appropriate answer)
Daily__ Weekly__ Monthly__ As much as possible__

How long can u last? (check appropriate answer)
1min ___ 15min__ 30min__ 1hr__ all nite___

Do u like Giving oral sex? (Y/N)___

What could you do for me that no one else could?:

Which do u prefer? (check appropriate box)
One on one__ Doubles__ Group___

While having sex, what do u do? (place "X" in all appropriate boxes)

Faint__
Cry__
Moan__
Wiggle__
Twist__
Jerk about__
Pant__
Sweat___
Scream__
Hum__
Whistle__
Just lie there__

List three positions u like:
1.
2.
3.

What is ur preferred pace? (place "X" in appropriate spaces)
Slow__ Fast__ Very fast__ Rigorous___

Do you like rough sex?
No__ Sometimes__ Always__

Do you like to talk dirty?
No__ Sometimes__ Always__

When is the best time to reach u? (place "X" in appropriate spaces)
Morning__ Afternoon__ Nite___

How late can u stay out? (place "X" in appropriate spaces)
11-12am__ 1-2am__ all nite___

Any talent or skills(Y/N) if so, list:

Most interesting place you've done it:

What would you do to me if we were stuck alone together in an elevator for an hour?

b i o n i c
10-23-2006, 09:19 AM
this is no fun. tell us she's hot and had enormous boobs or something

monkey
10-23-2006, 09:20 AM
she forgot

how many STD's have you have?

how many STD's do you currently have?

how many STD's are you willing to let me have?

zorra_chiflada
10-23-2006, 09:21 AM
exactly. who wants to fuck an ugly chick?

Loppfessor
10-23-2006, 09:23 AM
exactly. who wants to fuck an ugly chick?


Drunk guys...

Dorothy Wood
10-23-2006, 09:24 AM
some people do. I just find it odd that she's trolling for booty calls and wants to know specifically who will do her, and how.

Dorothy Wood
10-23-2006, 09:24 AM
this is no fun. tell us she's hot and had enormous boobs or something


she's got large breasts.

zorra_chiflada
10-23-2006, 09:24 AM
ugly girls desperate for lots of random fucking is so not hot

b i o n i c
10-23-2006, 09:25 AM
if shes as gross as you say, there should be a question about lights on/off and maybe something about mirrors on the ceiling.

zorra_chiflada
10-23-2006, 09:25 AM
show us a pic

b i o n i c
10-23-2006, 09:26 AM
she's got large breasts.


if she looks like miss piggy, theyre probably not the yummy appetizing kind, but the flappa-dap-knee-mudflaps kind (n)

zorra_chiflada
10-23-2006, 09:27 AM
you like big boobies don't you?

Otis Driftwood
10-23-2006, 09:27 AM
some people do. I just find it odd that she's trolling for booty calls and wants to know specifically who will do her, and how.
Let me tell, in one year the responding persons will no longer be allowed to board an airplane.:cool:

b i o n i c
10-23-2006, 09:27 AM
i like all boobies. and coolies too

Dorothy Wood
10-23-2006, 09:29 AM
show us a pic


uhhh, nah. I feel bad. I'll pm it to ye if you really want to see her profile and all that.

zorra_chiflada
10-23-2006, 09:30 AM
uhhh, nah. I feel bad. I'll pm it to ye if you really want to see her profile and all that.

no thanks.


HAHA YOU HAVE A CONSCIENCE! YOU HAVE FEELINGS FOR OTHERS! SUCKED IN!

b i o n i c
10-23-2006, 09:32 AM
yes, profile

Loppfessor
10-23-2006, 09:34 AM
uhhh, nah. I feel bad. I'll pm it to ye if you really want to see her profile and all that.


Nah girl, I'm not tryin to worry bout that skank...I wanna know what's up with you? Can I guy you some wine??

Dorothy Wood
10-23-2006, 09:36 AM
it's one thing to make fun of her on a message board, but quite another to freely pass her picture around!

although she was my enemy in middle school, we were always fighting and I hated her so bad. come to think of it, I can't even remember why. a lot of why my friends and I hated her was because she was gross and fat. which isn't very nice. although, she wasn't always nice, she once told me she put ex-lax in my milkshake. so I dumped it on her. ha!

ahhh to be 13 again. wait, maybe we were 12. I was 12, ya. 12 year olds are stupid.

HOTWIFE
10-23-2006, 09:36 AM
what is this world coming to

b i o n i c
10-23-2006, 09:45 AM
*steps quietly out of the room backwards*

not even the boobies are good enough for such a lengthy application

monkey
10-23-2006, 09:47 AM
PM it to meeeee. i wanna seeeeeeee!

Loppfessor
10-23-2006, 09:49 AM
PM it to meeeee. i wanna seeeeeeee!


ah crap....me too damnit

HOTWIFE
10-23-2006, 09:49 AM
ah crap....me too damnit
you know, i kinda wanna see too

monkey
10-23-2006, 09:57 AM
oh she's got really bad skin. it looks like she's just piling stuff on it instead of attempting to fix it. :(

zorra_chiflada
10-23-2006, 09:58 AM
ok i want to see now :(

b i o n i c
10-23-2006, 10:00 AM
she went to beauty school :(

zorra_chiflada
10-23-2006, 10:02 AM
i wouldn't hit it :(

b i o n i c
10-23-2006, 10:05 AM
i bet her butt is pimply

HOTWIFE
10-23-2006, 10:11 AM
i love how you titled the pm 'boobies' :D too bad i can't see it at work. myspace is blocked. fuckers.

Loppfessor
10-23-2006, 10:16 AM
i love how you titled the pm 'boobies' :D too bad i can't see it at work. myspace is blocked. fuckers.


ditto....we have sooo much in common...umm I think you're neat....I gotta go!

HOTWIFE
10-23-2006, 10:33 AM
ditto....we have sooo much in common...umm I think you're neat....I gotta go!
well since we're using mr. roger's terms and all...i think you're swell Lop:D

Loppfessor
10-23-2006, 10:51 AM
well since we're using mr. roger's terms and all..


sorry baby what I meant to say is that ass is fat...can I zooma zooma zoom zoom zoom in your boom boom?

HOTWIFE
10-23-2006, 10:57 AM
sorry baby what I meant to say is that ass is fat...can I zooma zooma zoom zoom zoom in your boom boom?
my my

Loppfessor
10-23-2006, 10:59 AM
Sorry...I heard that on BET or in a movie or something...not quite sure what it means. Meanwhile I"m going to lunch...

HOTWIFE
10-23-2006, 11:00 AM
Sorry...I heard that on BET or in a movie or something...not quite sure what it means. Meanwhile I"m going to lunch...
just shake your rump!

you should have a liquid lunch it's more fun

later!

Echewta
10-23-2006, 12:51 PM
hahaha, "How late can you stay out?"

Loppfessor
10-23-2006, 12:53 PM
just shake your rump!

you should have a liquid lunch it's more fun

later!


I had to go home and eat sammiches/doritos cus I'm broke till I get some checks in the mail...maybe tomorrow I'll scrounge up enough for a smoothie though