Like I need my nerves to be shot anymore for goddamn fucking fucks sake

[HEIRESS]

I was sitting here INTERNETING and I hear a fucking SHA-BANG from my roomates bedroom from something heavy smashing into the floor and then Im shitting my pants immediately

oh fuck not again oh fuck not again not again please not again

and Im standing in the entry to the hallway trying to stop shitting my pants so I can suck it up and go investigate

of course Im home allllllllll alone again

so I finally barge into the room and see that the board that we'd used to patch up the busted window had been blown back into the room because we are experiencing a somewhat windy evening

FUCKFUCKFUCK

Im still all shaky, and I feel like the hugest pussy in the entire world and WHY cant I shake this stupid paranoid fear thats attached itself to me lately

[mikizee]

for some reason the only 2 words that stood out in that post were hugest pussy.

great. now i have giant vaginas running thru my head.

[Otis Driftwood]

Didn't you just have a burglar from Crack Alley last week?

[Drederick Tatum]

*gives back rub*

[venusvenus123]

hugs!

[HEIRESS]

we have a whole carpentry shop in our basement so my roommate went down there and found me this big ass demolition tool that looks like a 30 pound double headed hiker's ice-pick

:/

[Otis Driftwood]

You gots to get something you can wield real quicklike, best a rabbit-slayer pocketknife, sharp as hell. Remember to stab upwards, so you don't slip off a bone.

[Dr Deaf]

damn, with all those carpentry tools in the basement you'd think the fellas could properly secure a window.

that really sucks, i'm sorry you're experiencing this nonsense.

[HEIRESS]

YOU'D THINK!

oh god, now you have me thinking someone shoved it in

askdjfhajksdhfkajsd

THANKS ALOT BOBBY

I usually have one of these handy because its short enough to give good movement and the cast iron head is heavy as all fuck
http://reserveamerica.campingworld.com/browse/skus/index.cfm/Outdoor-and-RV-Accessories/Outside-Your-RV/Outdoor-Decor/Patio-Accessories/Outdoor-Cooking/Square-Sandwich-Cooker/skunum=25728

[Dr Deaf]

yessssss!

i love the sweet camp fire goodness that comes from pie-irons.

apple and cinnamon for me please!

at the very least just keep an aluminum bat handy. i have no doubt you could club the shit out of an intruder.

[HEIRESS]

dude, we should go to the batting cages sometime!

my choice is the fastball, not slow pitch cage and anything around 50mph will do nicely
there is nothing better than hitting so much that your arms start to quiver and you cant grip anything with your hands for the next hour

[Dr Deaf]

you're a machine.

i actually can't ever remember spending time in a batting cage.

i shovelled a lot of snow tho.

[HEIRESS]

NO MO' O'THAT NOW EH!

shoveling snow hard work man
and only fun if you doing it to clear the ice

[HEIRESS]

I was referring to not the speed but the angle at which the ball is coming atcha

He did
but im going to add duct to whatever new repair job he does for that ladies touch

[skra75]

30 pound double headed hiker's ice-pick

:/

that's shit hot

[HEIRESS]

my 70 litre backpack has an ice-pick holder

I should carry it around with me

:cool: