View Full Version : i spilled gravy on my goddamned shoes
they're black shoes, but you can still see the stain. it looks like somebody jizzed on them or something. it won't come out.
now i have to get new shoes
there's also gravy on my floor, and on a pair of fairly nice pants. i hope that comes out somehow
DipDipDive
12-01-2006, 12:57 PM
Sometime, NLOL and I want to go to Wal-Mart with some gravy and a turkey baster and squirt fat kids in the eye with it.
You should join us, Bob.
nah, they'd probably like it. it's only funny if they suffer
abcdefz
12-01-2006, 02:14 PM
Sorry that I jizzed on your shoes Bob.
For some reason, I usually think cmute is female, so replies like this carry an initial shock.
ericlee
12-01-2006, 02:17 PM
are they black leather shoes?
Take a damp cloth to them, wipe them all down.
Get some black Kiwi1!!!- this is a must.
find a sock or a t-shirt that you never use and dab the kiwi on it.
After that, take a brush and brush the kiwi off.
Your shoes will look as good as new.
I find lighting the kiwi on fire for a quick second (the ones in the tin) to get it nice and likwidy makes everything go smoother. or is that common knowledge?
ericlee
12-01-2006, 02:26 PM
I find lighting the kiwi on fire for a quick second (the ones in the tin) to get it nice and likwidy makes everything go smoother. or is that common knowledge?
C'mon Rock. That's advanced knowledge. Poor Bob was thinking about buying a new pair of shoes.
are they black leather shoes?
Take a damp cloth to them, wipe them all down.
Get some black Kiwi1!!!- this is a must.
find a sock or a t-shirt that you never use and dab the kiwi on it.
After that, take a brush and brush the kiwi off.
Your shoes will look as good as new.
they're not leather, no, they're...whatever sambas are made out of.
i dunno, i've been meaning to get new shoes anyway. those things got caught in the rain once and now i squeak everywhere i go for some reason
somebody recommend me some new shoes. sexy shoes, but nothing formal. something you would wear with jeans. and socks, too, recommend socks. i have no idea what i'm doing with socks.
HEIRESS
12-01-2006, 03:07 PM
hey bob, nice socks.
beastiegirrl101
12-01-2006, 03:17 PM
what were you eating that required gravy? You're white so I am assuming it's the brown kind. TG leftovers still?
no, it was a TV dinner of all things. i was incredibly drunk last night, so i sort of wasn't holding the carton straight as i stumbled into my room and i spilled a bunch of the gravy. gross
hey bob, nice socks.
hey, were you just using an automatic soap dispenser, or was i happy to see you?
cosmo105
12-01-2006, 03:37 PM
you really can't go wrong with ben sherman shoes (http://www.zappos.com/n/es/d/722022870/page/1.html)
zorra_chiflada
12-01-2006, 10:48 PM
that's what you get for eating gravy. gravy sucks.
that's what you get for eating gravy. gravy sucks.
look, if i want to end the day with a nice big piping hot bowl of gravy before bed, who are you to tell me i can't?
zorra_chiflada
12-01-2006, 10:53 PM
gravy is the most disgusting "food" that exists.
once, when i was little, i ate a whole tablespoon of gravy powder. then threw up for hours and hours. never again have i ever gone near gravy.
befsquire
12-01-2006, 10:54 PM
it looks like somebody jizzed on them or something.
that reminds me...
the orange county jail recently put mugshots on the jail roster. so, any time we run across one that's particularly bad, we email each other.
note: this is not a client of mine. but when i saw the photo, i immediately made an assumption as to the substance and the charge, and i was right. about the charge at least.
mugshot (http://www.orangecountyfl.net/bailbond/Default.asp?BookNumber=06040719&ID=3971811801480)
sorry about your goddamned shoes bob.
befsquire
12-01-2006, 10:55 PM
once, when i was little, i ate a whole tablespoon of gravy powder. then threw up for hours and hours. never again have i ever gone near gravy.
due to childhood vomiting incidents, i can no longer drink iced tea or eat regular cheerios. it took me over a decade to be able to eat pancakes again.
fucktopgirl
12-01-2006, 10:56 PM
look, if i want to end the day with a nice big piping hot bowl of gravy before bed, who are you to tell me i can't?
hehe, well you can...just weird. But you just eat the gravy like that ,plain without anything in it?
Kerrbear
12-01-2006, 10:58 PM
This is my favorite thread ever.
gravy is the most disgusting "food" that exists.
once, when i was little, i ate a whole tablespoon of gravy powder. then threw up for hours and hours. never again have i ever gone near gravy.
well of course it's gonna be disgusting if you do that!
you gotta drink a glass of water immediately afterwards
beth, there's no picture on that page. maybe you have to pass the bar in order to see it. too bad, i was jonesin to guess the charge
This is my favorite thread ever.
i am so relieved to hear that
when i posted it i was like "wait, hang on, this is gonna be one of those esoteric threads that nobody in a million years will ever give a shit about, isnt' it?"
good thing i decided to ignore that
HEIRESS
12-01-2006, 11:03 PM
hey, were you just using an automatic soap dispenser, or was i happy to see you?
how long are you fingers again?
befsquire
12-01-2006, 11:05 PM
beth, there's no picture on that page. maybe you have to pass the bar in order to see it. too bad, i was jonesin to guess the charge
sorry. do this.
www.bestjail.com, scroll down to inmate database, and then type in glee and then click on the blue name for natasha glee.
how long are you fingers again?
they're as long as the day is...long
my fingers are 24 hours long
Kerrbear
12-01-2006, 11:06 PM
i am so relieved to hear that
when i posted it i was like "wait, hang on, this is gonna be one of those esoteric threads that nobody in a million years will ever give a shit about, isnt' it?"
good thing i decided to ignore that
But this is YOUR thread, Bob. You're like Stephen King, your name should be bigger than the title so people will know the contents will be good.
at first impression i was going to guess that it was something to do with crack and/or prostitution
then i learned that i was at least half right
kinda sucks to be published like that though
having nerds on the internet laughing at you
But this is YOUR thread, Bob. You're like Stephen King, your name should be bigger than the title so people will know the contents will be good.
that was pretty much my rationale for pressing the "post" button
mikizee
12-01-2006, 11:08 PM
sorry. do this.
www.bestjail.com, scroll down to inmate database, and then type in glee and then click on the blue name for natasha glee.
lemme guess, crack and prostitution?
edit: oh it says that
befsquire
12-01-2006, 11:10 PM
it's helpful for knowing what your clients look like.
i swear my first thought when i saw that was "who jizzed on her face?" apparently, a john.
robert love must have gotten his wig taken away right before the photo was taken. he is also not a client. prosecutor tipped us off to his case. apparently, he is a repeat prostitute as well, but that's not his current charge.
Kerrbear
12-01-2006, 11:11 PM
sorry. do this.
www.bestjail.com, scroll down to inmate database, and then type in glee and then click on the blue name for natasha glee.
Espionage?
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