My Grandpop Just got Diagnosed with Cancer

[Praying Mantis]

They are going to do radiation; not chemo. Not sure how he will pull out if he did chemo. He is 82 has survived WW2, 2 strokes and a heart Attack. Lived life great. To quote Sinatra, he always lived life his way. I know this hasn't hit me yet. The doctors gave him 12 mos to 2 years. He lives 4 hours away so I am heading up to see him in a couple weeks and for easter. I think that is when it is going to hit me. We were really close. I know Im lucky to have had him around this long. AM I selfish for not wanting it to end?

[Otis Driftwood]

I'm sorry for this. There is no selfishness involved in wishing for a loved family member to stay with you for a while longer. Anyway, ask him about it, elder people are often like "What do the quacks know anyway?"...

[Praying Mantis]

I'm sorry for this. There is no selfishness involved in wishing for a loved family member to stay with you for a while longer. Anyway, ask him about it, elder people are often like "What do the quacks know anyway?"...

I was stunned when he was telling me about it. He was just so matter of fact about it. he was like they were treating me for pneumonia and "they found cancer".

Didnt really soften the blow much. Its just I figured at 32, im not an outwardly emotional person, and Im used to always having some sort of control in mylife, Im just nervous on how I am going to react when i see him.

[abcdefz]

Sorry to hear this. I hope you can be a comfort to him and the rest of the family.

[Otis Driftwood]

I was stunned when he was telling me about it. He was just so matter of fact about it. he was like they were treating me for pneumonia and "they found cancer".

Didnt really soften the blow much. Its just I figured at 32, im not an outwardly emotional person, and Im used to always having some sort of control in mylife, Im just nervous on how I am going to react when i see him.

I have this theory that most human beings are becoming more and more accustomed to accepting the "inevitable" the older they become. I can't talk to my grandma on the phone without her saying "I wonder if I live to see this and that".
Just make sure you two have some good conversation, I dunno about his childhood and stuff. I know these elder people are sometimes a bit tight-lipped about the olden times 'cause of their war experiences.

[paul jones]

sorry to hear about this

[QueenAdrock]

It's natural to not want someone you love to die, of course it's not selfish. But it's pretty sweet he lived to be the age he did, and at least now since you know when he's going to pass you know you can tell him you love him and spend time with him before he leaves. I can't tell you how many times I've heard people say "I wasn't able to say goodbye" or "I didn't tell them I loved them." Most people take what they have for granted and don't know what they have until it's gone; you're pretty lucky that you won't take anything for granted this next year or so. :)

[befsquire]

i think you should just try to be happy that you had him around for such a long time. but of course it isn't selfish to wish that nothing will happen and he'll be around for much, much longer.

[avignon]

I'm so sorry. But when a family member has an illness, you will go through multitudes of emotions and have contradicting thoughts every other day. Take it easy on yourself.

[zorra_chiflada]

sorry to hear this. i know how it feels to be hit with news like that.

the only advice i can offer is to take it one day at a time. don't be thinking about all of the whatifs 12 months down the track. just take each day as it comes. can i ask, what kind of cancer has he been diagnosed with?

[Praying Mantis]

sorry to hear this. i know how it feels to be hit with news like that.

the only advice i can offer is to take it one day at a time. don't be thinking about all of the whatifs 12 months down the track. just take each day as it comes. can i ask, what kind of cancer has he been diagnosed with?

sure, I belive that it is called Adenocarcinoma. It is in one of his lungs and in some of his lymph nodes. What makes it worse (right now) is they found this out because he had to go to the doctors b/c he had a pnemonia and that is how they found it. He is wearing oxygen all the time at least for now and maybe forever. As long he is not in pain, I have been ok. Im sure things will hit me more in 2 weeks when I head up to see him.