View Full Version : Dating Younger Women
So events have conspired that led me into a relationship with a younger girl.
She's really great - and I have a lot of fun with her (she's been begging me for Beastie CDs etc). The thing is that sometimes the age difference is really noticeable. For instance, she's uncomfortable with me having alcohol around or drinking in front of her (not copious amounts, just like 1 or 2 beers) - or she's still learning how to really deal with college homework and I feel like I can't give her advice on stuff she just has to experience.
Sometimes I wonder if I haven't gotten myself in over my head, I mean I'm done in like 4 weeks and she's done in like 3 years. Any advice or thoughts or just stories about this?
Maybe I'm ridiculous and age gaps aren't a big deal to other people.
ggirlballa
04-01-2007, 11:01 PM
if u enjoy being with her than age shouldn't be a problem except if it was an ilegal age
i wish the beastie boys were into dating younger woman, ya know 28 years younger:o
RaZoRbLaDe KiSs
04-01-2007, 11:03 PM
Ggirl arnt we STILL having this conversation? But it's the opposite?
Age doesnt matter to me. I dont think it should matter to you either. There's nothing wrong with it. And like my grandpa says, men should always be with someone younger so they'll have someone to take care of them when thier old.
If you wanna take that advice and run with it - go head.
Drederick Tatum
04-01-2007, 11:05 PM
the solution is simple, find a young girl that enjoys alcohol. best of both worlds.
ggirlballa
04-01-2007, 11:05 PM
Ggirl arnt we STILL having this conversation? But it's the opposite?
.
your way is the gold digger status mine is pedophile style .fuckin eww *vomits*
Schmeltz
04-01-2007, 11:08 PM
the solution is simple, find a young girl that enjoys alcohol. best of both worlds.
Cocaine works better.
The thing with alcohol is that she was brought up in a very strict environment. She can handle me drinking sometimes with friends or whatever, but it just makes her uncomfortable to be around it. She won't be of drinking age for a little while yet - so it's not like I can really offer her some and try to make it seem more normal (not legally anyways).
When I was her age I was uneasy about it too - I mean all my friends that drank at that time were just lazy drunks for a year or two. Experiencing the change in maturity and responsibility is what changed how I felt about alcohol...I don't think I can expect her to make that jump without experiencing it herself.
How old are you and her?
I'm 22, and she'll be 19 on May 28th.
The Notorious LOL
04-01-2007, 11:15 PM
aside from the legal drinking age, theres little/no difference between 19 and 22
Justin
04-01-2007, 11:16 PM
It's all about the sex(y)
and the..
compatibility:rolleyes:
Lo_Lyfe
04-01-2007, 11:21 PM
I'm shocked there's a 19 year old girl who doesn't like alcohol.
The Notorious LOL
04-01-2007, 11:21 PM
if shes into the lord, she probably doesnt like booze.
is she into the lord?
if shes into the lord, she probably doesnt like booze.
is she into the lord?
Yeah. Not all Christians are uptight though.
oh - and the 19-22 thing, maybe it just seems like a big difference to me, I changed a lot in the last 3 years.
RaZoRbLaDe KiSs
04-01-2007, 11:25 PM
your way is the gold digger status mine is pedophile style .fuckin eww *vomits*
haha what are you talking about? You and your phedophiles. Oh god your hilarious. (y)
The Notorious LOL
04-01-2007, 11:27 PM
Yeah. Not all Christians are uptight though.
yes they are.
well no, I mean as a whole the average 19 year old isnt vastly different from the average 22 year old.
Lo_Lyfe
04-01-2007, 11:27 PM
Yeah. Not all Christians are uptight though.
oh - and the 19-22 thing, maybe it just seems like a big difference to me, I changed a lot in the last 3 years.
You'll change even more in the next 3.
ggirlballa
04-01-2007, 11:27 PM
haha what are you talking about? You and your phedophiles. Oh god your hilarious. (y)
what the hell, why would i want pedophile honestly?, u keep bringing up that shit!
*confused*:(
sorry beck/waus, we're spamming yo thread
The Notorious LOL
04-01-2007, 11:28 PM
title the thread "dating younger women" and the 12 year olds start spamming :rolleyes:
ggirlballa
04-01-2007, 11:29 PM
title the thread "dating younger women" and the 12 year olds start spamming :rolleyes:
14 & 17 at least get it right
Lo_Lyfe
04-01-2007, 11:29 PM
Waus, have you guys had sex yet? That may be a fun way to introduce booze.
RaZoRbLaDe KiSs
04-01-2007, 11:33 PM
Oh the old get um drunk and fuck um - Do you want a real relationship with her or is she some bimbo you met at a bar?
If shes not into drinking dont push it on her, if you do you'll risk her pulling away from you because she'll think you dont respect her.
Maybe you should talk with her about it. If you care about her and it makes her THAT uncomfortable you should consider cutting back/not doing it around her.
The Notorious LOL
04-01-2007, 11:35 PM
if shes 19 and doesnt drink what are the odds he met her at a bar?
jabumbo
04-01-2007, 11:35 PM
the age doesnt seem to matter, it seems more about the drinking. i know plenty of younger girls (and guys really) who even once they hit the legal age aren't big on drinking.
i mean, i myself loves to put one back every so often, but most parties and such where people go just to get really drunk kind of bothers me even still after 5 years of seeing it every weekend.
maybe you should just give her the lowdown so she realizes alcohol isnt just for kids to get plastered with?
We've talked about it. I still drink with my friends sometimes, but I don't keep any around the apartment.
I don't think I'm uptight..."rigidly conventional" is apparently what the word means.
maybe you should just give her the lowdown so she realizes alcohol isnt just for kids to get plastered with?
Yeah, that's pretty much how it went down. The thing is just getting used to the presence of alcohol with people who don't make it look bad. You can't really explain something that has to be learned with experience.
Lo_Lyfe
04-01-2007, 11:43 PM
We've talked about it. I still drink with my friends sometimes, but I don't keep any around the apartment.
I don't think I'm uptight..."rigidly conventional" is apparently what the word means.
She is trying to make you uptight.
befsquire
04-02-2007, 12:32 AM
yeah, i don't think there's a huge gap between 19 and 22, when the younger person is the female, because women mature a little more quickly than men.
she sounds a tad bit controlling, but like she uses words like "uncomfortable" to make it seem like she's not trying to tell you to quit drinking.
i think any problems you're experiencing aren't so much about her age, as much as they are questions about whether you can be with someone who seems to be very different and had a different upbringing. if you click with someone, you don't really notice the age thing unless it comes to shows you watched as a child, or when making a joke on your birthday.
she sounds a tad bit controlling, but like she uses words like "uncomfortable" to make it seem like she's not trying to tell you to quit drinking.
whether you can be with someone who seems to be very different and had a different upbringing.
She was really reluctant to admit that it made her uncomfortable, said she felt mean for telling me so. I dunno, it's not like she wanted me to quit, she just didn't like being around it.
The irony is that we had fairly similar upbringings. Practically no one in my family drinks, pretty conservative.
roosta
04-02-2007, 01:21 AM
the age difference isn't the problem, its the no booze that's the problem
ditch her!
befsquire
04-02-2007, 01:24 AM
She was really reluctant to admit that it made her uncomfortable, said she felt mean for telling me so. I dunno, it's not like she wanted me to quit, she just didn't like being around it.
The irony is that we had fairly similar upbringings. Practically no one in my family drinks, pretty conservative.
ah. well, i guess try to look at it this way: assume she never changes her viewpoint and it always makes her uncomfortable. are you going to feel comfortable being who you are around her, or are you going to feel like you have to change, or lie about what you're doing so she won't feel bad, etc? she may not experience in 3 years what you did. are her differences too much to deal with? if not, then stay where you are. if so, then try to figure out if you should keep from getting too serious with her.
na§tee
04-02-2007, 03:22 AM
dearie me i would so date a younger man but only if i could pour pure methanol down his throat while whispering all the wicked things i would like to do to his lithe youthful body.
hahah. erm.
i dunny thing 19 & 22 is any real cause for concern. i think her attitude to having a couple of drinks is, though. because that might balloon into a bigger problem further down the line. explain you can have a couple of pints without become a frothing, pissed up lush, since you, er.. are an adult an' all-a that.
mp-seventythree
04-02-2007, 07:29 AM
If she's religious and doesn't drink, make sure you watch out for Pillow Pants;)
roosta
04-02-2007, 11:30 AM
dearie me i would so date a younger man but only if i could pour pure methanol down his throat while whispering all the wicked things i would like to do to his lithe youthful body.
hahah. erm.
get the gaurds!
backwoods
04-02-2007, 12:14 PM
the solution is simple, find a young girl that enjoys alcohol. best of both worlds.
good advice!
Dorothy Wood
04-02-2007, 12:50 PM
I changed a lot from 19-22, but I've also changed a LOT in the last 2 years (25-27).
I think that when you're under 21 and you're kind of a goodie goodie, alcohol and drugs seem really bad and scary. I was a goodie goodie, but once I discovered the drink at 18 (my friends who were also previously non-drinkers and I decided to go camping and try drinking. one of us stayed sober each night though, in case anything went horribly wrong! hahhaaa), I was like, "woo hoo! this is fun!" but I wasn't getting wasted, I was having maybe 3 drinks at a time, once a month or so.
when I was 22, I dated a 20 year old. there were lots of problems related to the disparity, some maturation issues. we're still friends though. he's still immature...but he makes 4 times as much money as me and drives a BMW now. I should've married him when I had the chance. ;)
Documad
04-02-2007, 10:25 PM
Sometimes I wonder if I haven't gotten myself in over my head, I mean I'm done in like 4 weeks and she's done in like 3 years. Any advice or thoughts or just stories about this?
Are you saying that you're almost done with school and she's going to be in school for three more years? That seems like a bigger issue than age or habits. It might have been my unique situation, but when I finished college, I wanted to get as far away from college life as possible. And she might really miss out on some college fun if she's dating someone who's done with college. Depends a lot on where you live, whether you're going to move, etc.
Drederick Tatum
04-02-2007, 10:52 PM
just spike some of her drinks, have a great time, tell her the next day what you did and then she'll realize how great alcohol is and how she can't live without it.
Or start her out with pussy female drinks eventually. Fruity stuff. The setting would have an effect too. Just keep her away from idiots that don't know their limit. It'll leave an impression that you might act like that eventually. Which isn't true... riiiiight? :cool:
Thanks for all the good and bad advice!
I think it'll seem more normal to her after a couple years, and if it doesn't it's no big loss. I'd rather alcohol wasn't that central to my personality anyways. I had a couple drinks and rocked out at a Black Lips show tonight then came back to watch Adult Swim with her...I think things'll work out nice.
Otis Driftwood
04-03-2007, 05:22 AM
i dunny thing 19 & 22 is any real cause for concern.
I'd even go so far as saying it isn't any real cause for a threat.
Naw, if you feel that way... The girls I'm currently dating are 26 and 21, is that a cause for pedo-alarn? Don't think so. I don't notice any age-relevant differences, both of them seem more mature than me, which is kinda easy. So I conclude you are either very mature or your date is a very "young un"...
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