anyone have

[HOTWIFE]

experience with divorce? I'd appreciate any advice....looking more for financial advice here. is there anything you would have done different? as you know my husband cheated on me, so i guess i'll be the one filing for the divorce. i'd like it if we could do it without lawyers but i'm not sure we can. i have no clue where to start.

[abcdefz]

I wouldn't go with the "my husband cheated on me" thing. If they find out you cheated on him, it could really backfire.

[Yeti]

Ah, yes, divorce ... from the Latin word meaning---- to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet:rolleyes:

The words finances and divorce are in a thesaurus next to lawyer. My brother got divorced. They tried to do it together and after many nasty pissing matches they got lawyers.

[befsquire]

i got a divorce back in 2004. i could have taken him for a LOT. but i didn't, because he is a really good person, and he is the father of my children. also, since i was leaving him, i didn't want anything i felt was "his." further, i don't feel like i should be taking from someone just because i'm the female in the equation. i can work and support myself, and that is way more satisfying than saying i got whatever in a divorce.

you wanted to leave him before you found out he was cheating, so don't use that as an excuse. take only what you're entitled to and get out and move on.

[MC Moot]

My advice,based on my experience:

1) Look out for your financial well being:....but don't focus on one upping your ex or profiteering from what is a shitty process to begin with...

2) Be the bigger person:....don't get bogged down in who get's the china or the cat...

3) It took 2 to tango,so to speak:....so recognize that you may very well be culpable in the dissolution of the union....once you accept that, you can grow and move on alot easier....

4) Aim for a clean break: You may even have to sacrifice mutual friends and relations....me I geographically moved and put the Rocky Mountains between us,gave up the sea,but now I'm free.....

5) Take counsel:...from a professional,a pastor,someone who is removed from the situation and has a history of understanding the difficulty's you're about to face.....

6) Watch your health:....be good to yourself,be well.....


Best wishes,Moot

[kll]

My ex and I hired a mediator. It was like $500 to sit down, discuss what we were dividing up, and she filed all of the paperwork. It was a very easy way to dissolve what had existed.

Depending on the laws where you live, and I believe you do not have kids with him (neither did I), you may just go your separate ways and neither of you will owe each other anything. Keep in mind, if either of you have a 401K, the other is entitled to 1/2 of it.

[alruggs]

i got a divorce back in 2004. i could have taken him for a LOT. but i didn't, because he is a really good person, and he is the father of my children. also, since i was leaving him, i didn't want anything i felt was "his." further, i don't feel like i should be taking from someone just because i'm the female in the equation. i can work and support myself, and that is way more satisfying than saying i got whatever in a divorce.

you wanted to leave him before you found out he was cheating, so don't use that as an excuse. take only what you're entitled to and get out and move on.

I can't believe it was 2004. Time flies.