i'm going deaf in my right ear

[Bob]

if it doesn't heal on its own i'm considering actually seeing a doctor about it. i've narrowed down the probable cause of the impairment to the above options: if you vote on the right answer, you'll get something cool

[adam_f]

So you're trying to copy my ear problem. I see how it is.

[Randetica]

girls like that

[Bob]

i forgot to add a poll but here's what the options would have been

1) spider bite
2) ear infection
3) qtip accident
4) elves
5) voodoo curse

i'm leaning towards spider bite, but i think the elves might have been in on the conspiracy

[fucktopgirl]

qtips accident

[beastieangel01]

echewta

[Bob]

qtips accident

if you hear a loud "pop", followed by a lifetime of silence, you've gone too far

[Bob]

the reason i'm leaning towards spider bite is that i've been waking up with strange bumps on my body recently. like one morning i woke up with a red bump on my arm, and it's been around for like a month; it's just now stopped being bumpy, and the red part's starting to scab off. a week after the first bump, another, similar looking one appeared on my torso. my theory is that a spider or some other kind of dead-when-i-find-it creature is biting me in my sleep; i think it may have bitten me in my ear. because when i stretch out my ear a little bit, i can start to hear a little better.

but sometimes it also feels like there's some kind of fluid in there, like when i move my head around, it maybe feels like there's something moving in there. or maybe it's just that i'm disoriented, i dunno.

what it feels like, is like you know how when you're in a plane, or you're driving up or down a big hill, and your ears start to pop? it's like that, only it won't go away.

truth be told though, i honestly don't mind. most of the noises i hear in any given day piss me off anyway, so i don't mind hearing them at a 5 instead of a 10

[TurdBerglar]

hydrogen peroxide

[insertnamehere]

i'd go with rubbing alcohol, actually

[mikizee]

go to the frigging doctor!

[Bob]

i'm american, it costs money to do that

[Suavee-Bolo]

You know it's possible for insects like a spider to live in your ear, right?

[Bob]

i've heard

[Bob]

via my left ear, of course

[TurdBerglar]

one of my aunts had a spider lay an egg sack in her ear

[Bob]

one of my aunts had a spider lay an egg sack in her ear

shut up

[TurdBerglar]

you know one of those white fuzzball things full of teeny tiny spiders? yeah on of those

[Bob]

that never happened stop lying

[TurdBerglar]

it's just infant spiders, bob


well like hundreds. but still.

[Suavee-Bolo]

my gram had a remedy for stuff like this.

Get a potato and cut it directly in half.
Rub the potato on your ear and then bury it in your backyard.

You'll be good as new in the morning.

[TurdBerglar]

what if the dog digs it up and eats it

[Suavee-Bolo]

wait, what....

why would a dog eat a potato with baby spiders on it for?

[TurdBerglar]

why does a dog eat shit?

[Suavee-Bolo]

All i know is the first time I got a pimple my gram did the potato remedy and in the morning the pimple was gone.

[Knuckles]

Maybe Bob should cut a potato in half and put it down his pants.





might help him get laid(y)

[TurdBerglar]

or to get a dog to lick his dick at least

[Bob]

either that or my dick'll disappear

[TurdBerglar]

dick'll


hahaha


dick'll

[ET]

My uncle got bitten in the ear by an ant. You might want to get it looked at. You'll probably get some drops or something and you might not lose your hearing.

That and they'll have to use a laser to kill the baby spiders that live in your ear before the hundreds of them consume your ear drum upon hatching from their cocoon.

[Bob]

sure, you can use it

[abcdefz]

Is this the ear that you can't hear in? Bob, I will love you till the day that I die.



...and then I'm a-gonna have a whole harem! -- an' you just wait 'n see, too!


*pulls cigar lighter, gets a flame, first try*


HAWT DOG!

[adam_f]

Originally posted by Bob
either that or my dick'll disappear

Not like you use it anyway :rolleyes:

[abcdefz]

MY MOUF'S BLEEDIN' BERT

[abcdefz]

HOW'S YOUR WIFE?

[paul jones]

LO BOB!!!!!!!!!!

[icy manipulator]

2 1 kilowatt subs + 3 years as a delivery driver = i've prolly lost alot of my hearing :(

[paul jones]

Um, he's deaf, not blind.:D

PARDON?