hpdrifter's self-indulgent relationship thread #43579

[hpdrifter]

I had a bad fight with the boyfriend last night. I'm not sure what happened, one minute we were joking around about something and the next he was really angry about it.

He totally wasn't himself, he was super cold. Usually he can't stand to see my cry but last night he just didn't seem to care at all. He didn't respond to my (albiet awkward) efforts to put a stop to the silent treatment. I was standing talking to him and he was talking back to me but I just felt nothing from him.

Even after we resolved it I still don't feel like he cares that much. Normally he sends me an email or something saying I'm sorry about last night (even when its my fault) and wishing me a good day.

I haven't heard from him at all today.

[DIGI]

Just saddle up when you get home. The feelings will flow afterward.

[Rock]

My advice to you is this: Talk to HIM about it. Let him know exactly what you have shared with us. Communication me love, communication.

And the "Talk to HIM about it" wasn't meant to be in a dicky way.

[cookiepuss]

:( I suppose i'd say he might be shutting down cause he needs some space. you haven't been living together that long. and it's an adjustment.

what were you joking about exactly? I think I need more details.

I think maybe you should let him come to you and don't bring anything up to him right away. go out with friends after work or something.

[venusvenus123]

My advice to you is this: Talk to HIM about it. Let him know exactly what you have shared with us. Communication me love, communication.

And the "Talk to HIM about it" wasn't meant to be in a dicky way.

i agree with that. i also think you're lucky to have a boyfriend who emails you after an argument. i guess i sometimes get a text... but getting "sorry" is like blood from a stone.

hope it works out ok. :)

[Rock]

go out with friends after work or something.

I dunno, what if he is like "We just got in this huge fight and she is out with her friends!?!? THAT FUCKIN BITCH!"

I'd say get it all out on the table before it eats away at you and him and makes things worse. But thats just how I roll, ya feel me?

[beastieangel01]

communication, as others have said.

good luck. I hate that feeling that you are experiencing right now, too.

[hpdrifter]

Well I sent him an email about 45 minutes ago and have not heard back.

I guess I'll just leave him alone.

[cookiepuss]

I dunno, what if he is like "We just got in this huge fight and she is out with her friends!?!? THAT FUCKIN BITCH!"

I'd say get it all out on the table before it eats away at you and him and makes things worse. But thats just how I roll, ya feel me?

I'd say if he's not speaking to her then she doesn't need to grovel at his feet with "OMG we got in a fight we have to talk right now."

I'm not saying they shouldn't talk eventually..but perhaps they could use some time away from eachother to regroup. it's the too close to the forest to see the trees thing. taking space can be really helpful. and most people come back more compose and less reactive than when they are forced to talk about something they aren't ready to talk about. communication is important but you can't force it.

[hpdrifter]

That's true but the space thing has never been his strong suit.

He's never wanted it before...