fucked up first names

[befsquire]

everyone either knows someone with a first name that makes you wonder what the hell the parents were thinking, or you've read it or heard it from someone. i cruise the jail roster for them.

some of my faves from the w, j, b, s and p sections:

cycle
zanmickelain
quartisha
silky
antwanious
alpacino (i swear to god that's his first name)
knevhen
twoquala
jwyanza
vahonell
seointaie
timecesse

[discopants]

Not exactly the same thing but I've heard of a guy called Peter Cushing and my boss knows a guy called Peter rabbit. Crazy.

[venusvenus123]

funnily enough, this is a news story i saw today on the bbc news website:

A BOY CALLED PRIMROSE
Following our piece on real people lumbered with undertone-laden names like Lolita and Lucifer (see link, below), here is a selection of your unusual or difficult names.

Story from BBC NEWS:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/pr/fr/-/1/hi/magazine/7244427.stm
it's easier to read through the link.

i was wondering whether my son's name might fall into this category... until i read that list of names. quartisha???? silky?? that sounds like a made-up prostitute's name.

[checkyourprez]

i think i got one that takes the cake.

as hard as this story is to believe i swear on my internet its true. this dude i work withs brother worked for a recreation program and he had this one kid in his program with such a ridiculous name i really couldnt believe it. it was so just beyond the laws of sensiblity that i made him show me the list of kids so i could really see his name.


kids name was SHITHEAD. no fucking lie. but it was pronounced Shi-Thead.


I dont know if the kids mother was smoking the glass dick when he was born but I would not be surpised.

[Randetica]

adolf

[jabumbo]

an old friend from high school just named her son xander phoenix apparantly

so we are just going to call him XP and crack bad microsoft jokes all the time

[DandyFop]

so we are just going to call him XP and crack bad microsoft jokes all the time

this is the single most nerdy thing ever posted

[TurdBerglar]

you ever notice that profesional atheletes and other general cool people have a much higher percentage of names that just roll of your tongue? do yourself and your future kids a favor and give them kickass names.

[ToucanSpam]

you ever notice that profesional atheletes and other general cool people have a much higher percentage of names that just roll of your tongue? do yourself and your future kids a favor and give them kickass names.

I completely agree. A short list:

JaMarcus Russell
LeBron James
Andre Kirelenko (sp)
Shaquille O'Neal
Doonovan McNabb
Joseph Addai
Dikembe Motombo (sp)

Pretty kickass.

[adam_f]

I know a girl named Lily Allen but I have trouble with my L's so I just call her L.A.

[trailerprincess]

Friends of a friend called their son Nemo, it was after Captain Nemo (not sure if that makes it better) but he was born about 3 weeks before Finding Nemo hit. And then they were a little embarassed. HHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA! Though if I ever had a girl, I do have a soft spot for the name Disco. :o

[hpdrifter]

bwhahhhahaaaa! alpacino? My god. Timecesse?

[afronaut]

dhanvantari

[checkyourprez]

dhanvantari


a half black, half italian mix?

[TOY]

This girl who used to work where I work was named "Tanya". Instead of being pronounced "tahn-ya" she insisted her name be pronounced "TAN-ya". The 'tahhh' is pretty. But 'TAN' made it sound so white trash- and she is! I can't picture her with a different name. Tina, maybe.

[TurdBerglar]

tanya is the most white trash name ever

[M.C. Guevera]

Forrest Rice. That's the full name of someone I know. Major asshole he is.

[russhie]

I did a bit of recruiting for awhile, and those names got pretty interesting.

There was a Dr. Wookie, which was my personal fave...but my mates loved 'Anus Anus' best.

[hitmonlee]

names that are based on real names but given their own spelling

eg. krystyna
ayden
jessikah


its pretty common amongst the lower class here to name their babies after american states/places, and they don't even know they are american states.

dakota
indiana
etc.

[russhie]

names that are based on real names but given their own spelling

eg. krystyna
ayden
jessikah



Ugh I hate that. We had this girl in for an interview the other day, her name was spelt Krystyl - what is she, a stripper?

[silence7]

Ha.....

A friend of the family that we rarely saw, had a kid I played with a couple times. His First name was Burf.

[Yeti]

names that are based on real names but given their own spelling
eg.
ayden


Believe it or not Ayden is a variant of Aidan.

The boy's and girl's name Ayden \ay-den\ is a variant of Aidan.
The baby name Ayden sounds like Aden, Aydin, Aydan, Aiden and Auden. Other similar baby names are Ayren, Ayken, Alden, Arden and Ryden.

[hitmonlee]

This girl who used to work where I work was named "Tanya". Instead of being pronounced "tahn-ya" she insisted her name be pronounced "TAN-ya". The 'tahhh' is pretty. But 'TAN' made it sound so white trash- and she is! I can't picture her with a different name. Tina, maybe.

over here it is generally pronounced tan-ya, in fact i think the only time i have heard tarn-ya is on this choc milk ad... which turned the name into a bit of a joke.

yeti: i'm just used to it being spelt aidan. i find anything else appears incorrect to my eyes.

[camo]

tanya is the most white trash name ever

For the UK's version I'd have to say 'Sharon'.


A mate of mine who teaches, once had the privilage to teach a young boy by the name of Adil Doe. I can imagin that name will cause him no end of grief as he got older.

[ms.peachy]

i think i got one that takes the cake.

as hard as this story is to believe i swear on my internet its true. this dude i work withs brother worked for a recreation program and he had this one kid in his program with such a ridiculous name i really couldnt believe it. it was so just beyond the laws of sensiblity that i made him show me the list of kids so i could really see his name.


kids name was SHITHEAD. no fucking lie. but it was pronounced Shi-Thead.


I dont know if the kids mother was smoking the glass dick when he was born but I would not be surpised.

Urban legend. The story is found in "Freakonomics", and it's from an unverified source.

[abcdefz]

A friend met a woman in the park as their two kids started playing together.

He asked what was the boy's name.

"Fragile."

:(

[mikizee]

I was at the supermarket recently and I saw a little boy running up and down the aisles, and his mother was following him yelling 'MOSES! MOSES! COME HERE MOSES!!!!'

Who the fuck names their kid Moses??? These are the sort of people who shouldn't be allowed to procreate.

The funniest name I have ever come across was this son of german migrants who used to hire audio equipment off of me.

His name, I shit you not, was Farmer Salamander Schlutzenburg.

[abcdefz]

"Moses" used to be not an uncommon name in the south.

[ms.peachy]

I do remember years ago seeing two women on the Today show who were sisters who had started their own clothing line. One was named LaSonya, I remember that for certain, and the other one I don't remember exactly but it was something quite like RaCatta. (By they way, they did not appear to be Italian.)

[abcdefz]

I think American Idol is often a font of awful first names, isn't it?

[TurdBerglar]

For the UK's version I'd have to say 'Sharon'.


A mate of mine who teaches, once had the privilage to teach a young boy by the name of Adil Doe. I can imagin that name will cause him no end of grief as he got older.

sharon is like a nice old lady's name here

[AceFace]

my cousin's name is Branch. poor guy.

[Rock]

I worked with a kid named Richard Head at Toys R Us.

I used to work on expense reports and here are some of the names that made me laugh.

Anil Joi
Harry Johnson III
Phuc Nguyen
and thats all i can remember right now.

[Yetra Flam]

yeah like 'temptress'

who the fuck names a newborn baby 'temptress'? that's wrong.

[paul jones]

I once worked with a MERLIN

I think his parents were hippies

[befsquire]

one of my friends at work used to work in california. when she was working there, she had a client named lil' nifty jr. yes, there's a sr. can't recall the last name.

[Junker]

My mom once had a student called 'Ericlapton'.... :P

[mikizee]

a friend of mine is good mates with a guy called frankie punch.

now THAT is a cool name

[Whatitis]

I met a guy the other day named Tanner. He was near 40 years old and I thought it was odd to have a name like that at that age. Parents! When you name your kids, remember, they will be an adult one day.

[BBboy20]

adolfUnless you were born before 1927.

[DIGI]

What's wrong with Tanner?

[BBboy20]

What's wrong with Tanner?Yeah, that isn't messed up. =/

[Bob]

"Moses" used to be not an uncommon name in the south.

i knew a guy named moses once...could eat half his weight in groceries

[hitmonlee]

What's wrong with Tanner?

isn't it more of a last name?
i've only ever heard it used on full house though :o

[mikizee]

i knew a guy named moses once...could eat half his weight in groceries

I heard he could trap the biggest, and meanest alligator, and just use one hand!

[hpdrifter]

Saw this today, there are some gems in here:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23631411/

[befsquire]

cyngue (it's a dude)
knevhen (i love silent H's!)
detanreus
maximino
lebellot
periclais
fallis
jhirmack (wasn't that a brand of shampoo?)
claevaris
lirencey


and finally, these names are so awesome, i had to post the whole names:
aracelis zambrana barbosa
albrian alshabazz

[ET]

Phuc Nguyen


Ahahaha! Classic Vietnamese name right there. Half of the asians I know are Nguyens.

Also, Enis. You're one letter away from penis. So easy to just draw a little P in there when you're grading exams. I should never become a teacher.

[Elusive]

I work at a telesurvey place and see some names. most of them I forget because the novelty wears off and I try to forget work but you know, there are names like Irma fagg, Dick Fagger, harry bills, then really random wierd ones like
stephen applehouseguard....
also celebrity names,
like I talked to ed mcmahon last week, and
I did the "hey got any millions of dollars for me"
joke, but followed it quickly with
"I bet you'd give a million dollars never to hear that again"
he said "yea, I'm like get a bucket"

[BangkokB]

Alpha