Your significant other got a body massage...

[SugarInTheRaw]

Your significant other got a professional body massage from someone of the same age, but of the opposite sex, a few weeks ago. You just found out about it. How do you feel/react?

[abcdefz]

Be happy for her.

[AceFace]

it's a fucking PROFESSIONAL massage. get over it.

[abcdefz]

If you're concerned, just ask who the CMT was and look for their ad. It'll probably say "non-sexual."

[kll]

i'd be upset if you found out he/she was at the asian massage parlor that doubles as a blowjob for hire, but if it's a professional environment without any happy endings, then there's not much you can do.


a lot of times, i've booked massages and not known what sex masseuse i am going to get.

i'm going to add that i think it would be weird to find out about something like a massage a few weeks later though... we pretty much tell each other our plans for the day/appointments, etc. so, that would be weird to not have it mentioned... maybe i'm being too sensitive.

[mickill]

I have a feeling that this may have actually happened for real.

[MC Moot]

ummm...I suppose it would be curious that she didn't mention she was going,cause we share everything....but I would expect nothing to be awry at all....I think if you felt otherwise your relation is probably suspect to begin...

[mickill]

ummm...I suppose it would be curious that she didn't mention she was going,cause we share everything....but I would expect nothing to be awry at all....I think if you felt otherwise your relation is probably suspect to begin...

Now for the thrilling conclusion to the last post:

....with

[AceFace]

a massage is a very private thing to some people.

[SugarInTheRaw]

a massage is a very private thing to some people.
Please elaborate. How do you mean "private"?

[kaiser soze]

I massaged my privates....should I tell my girlfriend?

[cookiepuss]

it's a fucking PROFESSIONAL massage. get over it.

+1


what bothers you about this? cause this is about YOU, not your significant other. your significant other didn't do anything wrong by going to a professional massage, nor should he/she have to ask your permission to go have a massage by a person of any sex.

is it that someone of the opposite sex did it, or that you weren't told about it? Both? Ask your self WHY it bothers you.

[Junker]

I would be very worried if I were you.
Take care. Your significant other could be hiding more things from you. Open your eyes!!!

[cookiepuss]

I would be very worried if I were you.
Take care. Your significant other could be hiding more things from you. Open your eyes!!!

yeah, like maybe he/she collects his/her toenail clipings and keeps them in a jar under the bed.

it might even be possible that sometimes...he/she wears the same pants two days in a row without washing them.

or even worse...he/she might occasionally make a lane change on the highway without signaling!:eek:


have you ever asked about that stuff? I mean he/she should tell you EVERYTHING.

[SugarInTheRaw]

+1


what bothers you about this? cause this is about YOU, not your significant other. your significant other didn't do anything wrong by going to a professional massage, nor should he/she have to ask your permission to go have a massage by a person of any sex.

is it that someone of the opposite sex did it, or that you weren't told about it? Both? Ask your self WHY it bothers you.
Eh? You presume much. I posed a hypothetical question to "you"! How would you feel, cookiepuss?

[HEIRESS]

was the masseuse blind by any chance?

[abcdefz]

Hell, I had a girlfriend who was a CMT. I didn't freak out about it because I trusted her.

[cookiepuss]

i wouldn't care. at all. my significant other doesn't need to tell me if he gets a massage form chick. it's a non-event.

[Rock]

i'd be pissed...only cause we couldn't have a couples massage. cause we are totally into the group thang.

[ericlee]

The only part I'd be bothered about is the finding out a few weeks later thing.

Why wait so long to tell?

[Rock]

Why wait so long to tell?

why even bring it up that long after the fact unless you felt guilty about something?????

this has herpes written allll over it.

[ericlee]

why even bring it up that long after the fact unless you felt guilty about something?????

sure. Something like this should be mentioned before the fact though. I can imagine a pro massuese(ssspppp) would take alot from the budget.

She wants to get a massage? Ok, I want to get my half stack.

Not just that, it's keeping secrets from each other.

[cookiepuss]

^ I think it really depends on how often they see eachother. if they live together then ya, you'd think it would come up the day of the massage or at the very least a few days later.

but if they lead busy lives and don't see eachother everyday, I could see how it might not get mentioned if right away if there are more pressing things to discuss.


P.s. Eric...what if they have separate finances? then they should be able to do what they want with thier own money. I don't see why it has to be interpreted as a big "secret" maybe it's just not that important, and so it wasn't brought up. I mean ther's only so much you can say about a massage. big whoop. (or maybe they didn't bring it it up because they knew thier other would have a rediculous jealousy fit.)



but then again, maybe I'm just entirely too relaxed and I should be more suspicious and jaded.

[checkyourprez]

ask her if it moved.

[ScarySquirrel]

Wait a minute...

I have a significant other?

[mikizee]

Your significant other got a professional body massage from someone of the same age, but of the opposite sex, a few weeks ago. You just found out about it. How do you feel/react?

big woop

like cookiepuss said, its a non event

[ericlee]

^ I think it really depends on how often they see eachother. if they live together then ya, you'd think it would come up the day of the massage or at the very least a few days later.

but if they lead busy lives and don't see eachother everyday, I could see how it might not get mentioned if right away if there are more pressing things to discuss.

*ring ring* "hello?"

"I'm going to get a massage today"

"Oh, ok"


P.s. Eric...what if they have separate finances? then they should be able to do what they want with thier own money. I don't see why it has to be interpreted as a big "secret" maybe it's just not that important, and so it wasn't brought up. I mean ther's only so much you can say about a massage. big whoop. (or maybe they didn't bring it it up because they knew thier other would have a rediculous jealousy fit.)

If people have seperate finances, I suppose it's ok. Just as long as both people agree with it. I've seen jealousy from the other because one seems to buy more things than the other.

I prefer to share the budget myself and then we spend on expensive things together, something we can do-use together.

Also, if she has to go to someone else for a massage, then I'm not doing my part. I do a damn good job myself.

What do I know though, I've never had to get a massage and neither has she.

[Rock]

but then again, maybe I'm just entirely too relaxed and I should be more suspicious and jaded.

nah...when my lady goes on vacation with her mom and sister they get massages all the time. i trust her enough to know that there was no funny bidness. if i couldn't trust her enough to get a massage then i need to check myself and not her...unless their was some previous event that would cause some suspicion.

so yeah...who cares.

its now smeared with herpes and vaginal discharge.

[kll]

yeah, like maybe he/she collects his/her toenail clipings and keeps them in a jar under the bed.


actually, i think this in particular led to the massage...

[funk63]

immediately assassinate massuse.

[Deep_Sea_Rain]

I somehow feel this (http://youtube.com/watch?v=Ww3GTNv9hHk) is appropriate.

[wrongwayandugg]

I somehow feel this (http://youtube.com/watch?v=Ww3GTNv9hHk) is appropriate.

LOL! I was thinking the same thing.

Hmm. As for the topic at hand, I don't think I'd be too upset with my boyfriend if he got a professional massage from a lady, but I have put limits on him and our relationship. I refused he go to strip clubs. It isn't really his thing in the first place, but my last bf was an ass and he went all the time with his friends. I won't have that again. Can any of you other ladies relate to that?

[camo]

I'd be fully ok with it if a female was to massage my girl, but guys can't help but be slightly miffed if another fella did the deed.

It's just how we are. :rolleyes:

[TOY]

Was it a masseuse, or a massage therapist?

If you answered masseuse, I'd be livid.

Massage therapist? No. Why?

[russhie]

At first I was like psssh no, it's just a massage.

But then I thought about it and I suppose I'd be annoyed if I didn't know about it until weeks after the fact.

[AceFace]

Please elaborate. How do you mean "private"?

well, i'm a CMT. there are so many privacy things we have to adhere to, b/c some people need that privacy. pain is a personal thing. some people, like myself, are loud and whiny when they're in pain and everyone in the office will know when you're finally gonna shut up and get a massage. others hold that pain in and don't let anyone know.

my point, maybe she was in pain and wanted to take care of it on her own without complaining.

if it was a professional massage, you should have no worries at all.

[hpdrifter]

I don't want this to come off mean because it isn't intended that way.

I think when stuff like this is bothering you its generally time to get back to yourself. I find in my own life when I get upset about stuff like this its because I have too much time on my hands or am unstimulated with my own life. So I go play my guitar or sing or whatever makes me feel better about myself. And then I wonder what I was upset about.

[AceFace]

^ that was a great post.

[cookiepuss]

^^ yeah hpdrifter said it much nicer than i did.(y)

[AceFace]

^^^ stop copying me, copy cat. :p

[hpdrifter]

Well I hope it helps. I mean, I still fall victim to it every now and again. I am a jealous person, its a sucky thing to have to admit but I am and I've had to develop strategies for dealing with it.

[AceFace]

how old are you hp?

i find that now that i'm a bit older, most of my jealousies have gone away. i find it cute when someone flirts with my husband. or if he finds another girl attractive. 5 years ago, i would have wanted to kill him for it.

[hpdrifter]

I turned 30 this year. I've found that its not so much my age but the length of time I've been with the person. Over time it seems to subside significantly. I've been with my current guy about 2 and a half years and its about then that the jealousy seems to subside.

Of course, just last night I got mad at him for laughing at a joke about getting a blowjob from a hooker in Amsterdam. :o I know I know.

[AceFace]

you're right, it might be the length of time. we're close to the same age (i'm always 29 don't you know...) we've been together almost 10 years. maybe that's it.

[abcdefz]

As far as I'm concerned, unless your S.O. has actually done something to lose your trust, you trust 'em. That's part of the commitment
you've made, and you shouldn't put somebody else in the position of tap-dancing around and second-guessing your paranoia.

[Junker]

Masseuse......... Everytime I heard/read this I remember that Seinfeld episode.

[b i o n i c]

what hpd said - let it sliiiiiiide, maaaaaan. maybe ask her to recommend one for you(y)

[hpdrifter]

Wait, is SITR a he or she? Is the SO a he or she? Does it matter?