Mandy Moore (is huge/rant)

[ET]

http://www.snarkstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/11/110607_simpson_400x400.jpg

HUEG!

So apparently she is 5' 10". Insane. After catching this photo via *insert random blogger* I actually went out of my way to find out how tall she is. While doing so, I did everything in my power to justify why, if given the chance, I would surely outperform the 4 steps of the worlds fastest internal combustion engine times infinity inside of Mandy Moore's hot box.

Here's why I should be apprehensive.

http://bp3.blogger.com/_nUKbIyDzTwY/R1RvegnboiI/AAAAAAAAFgo/TgZcwcx2WBg/s320/FrontBlog.jpg

Yeah, I remember back when I used to watch TRL *shudder* the video for Candy would pop on and I would vomit in my mouth a little at seeing this lanky thing gyrating onscreen to what sounded like something off of vh1's soft hit favorites list. She looked like that one girl in high school everyone called "Moose" and would have to dance with the tallest guy in that grade level, whom hadn't hit his growth spurt, just to hide the fact that she was crazy retarded tall. 'The hell did she turn from that to this?

http://www.xtreme-tuners.net/AFI/pics/mandy-moore-9.jpg

I mean besides a full time nutritionist, expensive make-up artist, and tons of blow. Oh yeah, another thing.

http://www.tshirtwatch.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2006/08/zack-braff.jpg

Horrible taste in dudes. Not that I'm not as white and dorky. And popular and rich. Godamn you and your scooter! Apparently she lost her V to some "I was in one of many late 90's teen movies" douche bag one shot actors. Not that losing it to a fat dude with a hairy back in a Honda CRX (http://www.honda-civic-power-locks.com/images/HondaCRX.jpg) is a step up. More like a step to the side.

Apparently she's into Jewish guys as well. It's notoriously difficult to hop onto that paddy wagon so there's no hope for a membership. I saw this on Sex and the City so I know what I'm talking about here.

[ET]

Oh yeah, I almost forgot.

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00005JKW0.01._SCLZZZZZZZ_.jpg

Any of those neo-Christians I ran into shortly after this movie was released, who abused alcohol and had sex with men before marriage on a weekly basis, pounced at any available opportunity to tell me that the soundtrack has all kinds of cool Christian songs on it and that the book was written by someone of the same faith and GOD GOD GOD GOD GOD EXPLOSIONZ!!!!11!!11!1111

It's not my fault that I got stuck in a course that education majors had to take as an elective but it's Mandy Moore's fault that she made this movie. Therefore I blame her for all those months of torment.

And she's pretty damn vanilla in terms of looks. Let's face it.

http://socialitelife.buzznet.com/images/2007/11/mandy_moore_112007_0001.jpg

With all that in mind; internal combustion engine. I suppose I'm just into brunettes. It can't be helped despite all of the convincing evidence.
For what it's worth, at least I'm not into what's her face.

http://kara.allthingsd.com/files/2007/10/fp8818hannah-montana-posters.jpg

She scares me. :(

[TurdBerglar]

the fuck?

[Auton]

no, no, he has a point. mandy moore is definitely very boinkable. and jesus, she is huge.

[ET]

Moral of the story; Hannah Montana is frightening.

[TurdBerglar]

no, no, he has a point. mandy moore is definitely very boinkable. and jesus, she is huge.

is that the point he was trying to get across because i have no idea what he was trying to say or why he was trying to say it

[Auton]

Moral of the story; Hannah Montana is frightening.

her teeth give me nightmares.

[ET]

Not that my grill is great or anything but I have to agree. It looks like it hurts her to smile. That upper mandible could gnaw through a wicker basket in an instant.

http://bp3.blogger.com/_MnVg0cz_o08/R2EpuyBF0YI/AAAAAAAAACc/kSehknXOfAA/s320/MTV_TRL_CYRUS_YARBROUGH_NYR113.jpg

Where's this guy's nipples?!

[Waus]

is that the point he was trying to get across because i have no idea what he was trying to say or why he was trying to say it

Seriously. If this thread was a school paper you'd be sent to the guidance counselor and probably end up on ritalin.


edit
but I did like that sketch you were working on for ba01 ET, cool stuff.

[na§tee]

i'm about 5' 10" too, et. and a bit. i'm not as slim as her though, so i really do look huge.

i'm surprised you didn't reveal the latest bit of mandy moore gossip, e - her mother recently left her father for some hot lesbo actshun. yeah.

i remember back in the dizzle (the good mister) brodie and i bum-rushed mandy moore's message board and tried to spread a rumour that she was collaborating with the beastie boys on her new record. it was unsuccessful.

that miley cyrus looks like dolly parton. dolly at 55.

[icy manipulator]

ROFL - i have an excuse to post this
http://img227.imageshack.us/img227/2093/andymandygentlemanwl7.jpg
i never thought of mandy moore as tall. compare A to

http://img99.imageshack.us/img99/8061/ehsharapovaroddick275kl7.jpg
B

masha really is a giant tho

[hpdrifter]

Hahahhhaaa! Thread of the month ftw.

[Echewta]

Want you, cookoo cannonball!!!

[ET]

Actually I am about 5' 10". Obviously, Mandy Moore and I were meant to be together forever due to our height.

So Mandy isn't exactly a giant. I think that Jessica Simpson must have a small head, according to that first photo. So she'd make anyone look huge.

http://msnbcmedia3.msn.com/j/msnbc/Components/Photos/051216/051216_nick_jess_vmed.widec.jpg

Case in point.

And I did catch that boob grabbing incident but couldn't find a linkable picture. I mean who can blame the guy? It would be near impossible not to honk or tune in Tokyo on those things twice an hour. I don't see the big deal. Too bad about her mum and the carpet munching. :/ I had no idea. She would need a 5' 10" man in her life to help her get over that hump. Yeah, definitely.

She also needs to get back in the studio and drop that shit for the B Boys. Want a commercially viable, multi platinum album? Two words... Mandy Moore.

http://www.celebrity-gossip.net/images/photos/mandy-moore-raleigh-nye.jpg

[Tzar]

i'd go her (y)

[Caribou]

I'm about 5'10". Thanks for calling me a freak. *cries*

Actually I like Mandy Moore better than any other teenpop bimbo. Maybe becaue she's less bimbo.

[roosta]

Good work

[The Notorious LOL]

I always thought she was cute.


5'10" is tall for a girl. My sister is about that height and if she wears heels shes as tall or taller than me depeding on their size.

[roosta]

The bottom of the poster/cover for "A Walk To Remember" says "Mandy Moore is Awesome".

Now, as we've all agreed Ms. Moore is attractive and tall, but does she really inspire awe in people? If you are over-awed by Mandy Moore there is something wrong with you.

[Loppfessor]

Dude what's wrong with tall women??!! I think it's hot. I'm only 5'7" but I've dated women much taller...Mandy Moore would get it in a heartbeat though

[Echewta]

:( I'm only 3'37" :(

[b i o n i c]

UGH... I'D SHAG THE SHITE OUTTA MM. YESPLEASETHANKYOU

[hpdrifter]

I think she's adorable. I don't particularly like her movies or her music (though i did dig her last album), I wish she could make a career guest starring on stuff. I don't think she can carry anything on her own but I wish she was more successful.

[b i o n i c]

Yeah, I remember back when I used to watch TRL *shudder* the video for Candy would pop on and I would vomit in my mouth a little at seeing this lanky thing gyrating

I REMEMBER WATCHING THAT VIDEO AND WISHING I WAS HER AGE... EFFIN HOT. Looks, personality, and i rarely say this about hollywood people, she seems fairly intelligent and down to earth

[ET]

Maybe because she's less bimbo.

Yeah she's like the perfect amount of bimbo. She's a lady on the street but a freak in the bed. It's just like that Usher song.

"Mandy Moore is Awesome" probably meant that she inspired awe in that reviewers pants. Understandable, right? And maybe because she's tall too. You don't look at the Eiffel Tower, for example, and say "Wow that's too big!" Instead, you say something like "Wow that is just big enough to inspire awe and it is perfect in many ways." It's like what guys say about Mandy Moore.

Heels kind of add to that effect too. I guess it's not her fault if she's so fashionable and trendy. She suffers for her fans. You've got to respect that.

[russhie]

5'10" is just about fucking perfect - I'd look so much better if I was nearer 5'8" or something, but no, i'm 5'3" and stuck this way.

God invented 12cm heels for people like me.

[Yetra Flam]

she seems ok. i liked that "saved" movie she was in.

[miss soul fire]

Tom Cruise is a midget (my height exactly), but he gets all the tall mommas!!

[jennyb]

I really liked 'Because I Said So' (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0490084/) and I thought she was really cool in that movie. :o

I'm towering at 5'10" as well. Sux though cuz if you're even slightly chunky, it makes you seem even HUGE-R. :(

*gets on treadmill*