do i get some sort of commission..

[na§tee]

..for you using my laptop to snort cocaine off?

was the message i left for my flatmate this morning.

coke is pretty poor craic. no thanks, kids.

during my first month here at this job, i told my director a story about joanna lumley in the 60s. apparently she loved being fucked up the arse by a coke-dipped cock and as a result her rectum has collapsed. so now she has a plastic arsehole. i told this director fucking joanna lumley has an artificial anus and my other boss is sat there like :eek: what the fuck are you doing? i couldn't help it. the words just spilled out of my mouth.

he fucking loved it though. 100 points to miss stewart.

amusing/horrifying coke stories to go here, please.

[mikizee]

Hmmmm to post or not to post....

I'll get back to ya

[camo]

I read somewhere that some kid snorted crack thinking he had bought coke off some shyster and died. I look for it later

[silence7]

Ya' Just can't make this shit up!

Schoolboy dies after snorting £1 bag of heroin that he thought was cocaine (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=553670&in_page_id=1770)

The Craziest Thing Gary Busey Ever Snorted Cocaine Off Of (http://blog.wired.com/games/2008/04/the-craziest-th.html)

Catch of the day: Cocaine (http://www.nzherald.co.nz/topic/story.cfm?c_id=272&objectid=10491443)

Sex in Car: Hooker Mom Snorts Cocaine Off Baby’s Stomach While Breastfeeding (http://www.breitbart.tv/?p=6274)

Keith Richards: `I Snorted My Father' (http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D8O9A8E00&show_article=1)

S7

[camo]

Ya' Just can't make this shit up!

Schoolboy dies after snorting £1 bag of heroin that he thought was cocaine (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=553670&in_page_id=1770)

thats the one! cheers (y)

[na§tee]

one pound?! jesus christ.

oh, love the people who comment on the daily mail website, ha:

"One less idiot to worry about"

"Serves them right, shouldn't buy the stuff in the first place, just a shame we can't find the person who sold it to them and force it up his nose as well!"

"Shouldn't have been doing either. Maybe a smack at the right time may have prevented it happening. Oh but it is illegal so you can't smack now, thanks to this stupid government."

[monkey]

two of my closest friends developed a hardcore coke problem last year. one of them went to rehab, the other went to therapy after the first went to rehab (for the 3rd time).

and still, the drug holds such appeal, to both of them and to me at times. it's fucking frightening.

[Lex Diamonds]

If you've got enough money, Charlie can be a really fun companion on a big night out. But when you're low on funds and you're still spending time with him, that's when shit stops being so much fun.

[faz]

one pound?! jesus christ.

oh, love the people who comment on the daily mail website, ha:


For some reason they never allow my comments :(

[mikizee]

Nicknames we have for coke -
charlie
toot
bear
put-down (because you PUT IT DOOOOWWWNNN!!!!<------you can actually only say that sentence properly when you've had coke)
gummy

hmmm thats all i can think of for now

[The Notorious LOL]

Cocaine is a drug for spoiled private school kids.

[Bob]

heroin though, that there is an everyman's drug

[The Notorious LOL]

unless its in a smoking format, then its for texas high school kids to smoke and die like swarms of mayflies.

[checkyourprez]

Cocaine is a drug for spoiled private school kids.


naaah maaan. im a state school educated kid and i know plenty of characters of all types that like to ski the old coke slopes.

[na§tee]

coke used to be the realm of ceos and high-fliers. now the price has become so cheap that any chump on the street could afford it, almost.

[Lex Diamonds]

It's the drug of the people! I know guys who won't smoke weed or even drink alcohol but they think it's OK to do sniff.

Take from that what you will (probably that I hang around with a load of scumbags like some kind of modern-day urban Robin Hood without the heroics).

[russhie]

^ yeah, I won't do anything but coke and have the occasional smoke, lots of people I know are the same. You can function pretty well with a fair habit and it's still a status thing - it's pretty expensive here, so if you can't afford it you're doing speed or fucking about with meth, ahaha.

Almost everyone I know does it for the status, I think...there are cheaper methods of getting fucked off your face.

[MC Moot]

hmmm...I smoked rock with a cop one time and he passed out backwards,cracked his head open on a fireplace mantle...wouldn't let us take him to the hospital but did give his remaining rocks up...nasty fuck'n bidnezz...(n)

[avignon]

About a million years ago, my ex boyfriend rented some old kung fu movies from some little mom and pop shop in his crapass neighborhood and when he took them home there was a bag of coke in one of the cases instead of the vhs tape. He took the whole thing back to the shop immediately and handed it to the guy behind the counter and said, "You can have this back. I don't have any idea what this is." The guy was like, "Oh. OH! Um yeah, ok. Thanks." The bag was as big as a vhs tape. I don't know but I think that is probably A LOT. And he had a rental account there. They knew his name and address and shit. That could've turned out real bad.

[mikizee]

^ yeah, I won't do anything but coke and have the occasional smoke, lots of people I know are the same. You can function pretty well with a fair habit and it's still a status thing - it's pretty expensive here, so if you can't afford it you're doing speed or fucking about with meth, ahaha.

Almost everyone I know does it for the status, I think...there are cheaper methods of getting fucked off your face.

Just about anything's cheaper than $350 a gram.

About a million years ago, my ex boyfriend rented some old kung fu movies from some little mom and pop shop in his crapass neighborhood and when he took them home there was a bag of coke in one of the cases instead of the vhs tape. He took the whole thing back to the shop immediately and handed it to the guy behind the counter and said, "You can have this back. I don't have any idea what this is." The guy was like, "Oh. OH! Um yeah, ok. Thanks." The bag was as big as a vhs tape. I don't know but I think that is probably A LOT. And he had a rental account there. They knew his name and address and shit. That could've turned out real bad.

Whoa. Thats HEAPS.

[ET]

I don't know how people can do coke and not think of this dude. (http://sincerelyty.files.wordpress.com/2007/09/tyrone_biggums.jpg) Maybe the same way I can eat fast food knowing how it's processed?

Also, it's amazing how fast coke went from an elitist, celebrity/yuppie type of activity to a frat boy type of thing.

[Dorothy Wood]

the last time I did coke, I let my friend put his weiner in my vagina. although, I stopped everything before it came to fruition because I couldn't stand the idea of seeing his face when he came. and actually, our friendship was never the same.

:/

that night was endless and retarded. basically, I just had furious and intense conversations with with a bunch of people I barely knew and kept fending off the advances of a particular boy, only to be later seduced by my friend when I was basically just crashing at his place. I'm not saying I didn't agree or accept his advances, I just remember feeling like, "shit, I would not be doing this if I wasn't completely obliterated", as I was drinking/smoking/snorting everything in front of me prior.

egh, dark days. although somewhat appealing to me lately.


um, that isn't a fun story at all. blargh. don't blame me, I'm drunk! again! yeah!

[taquitos]

you should tell your mom about that next time she asks you to fold up the futon

[ET]

Yeah there's always a time for coke stories. Prime example. ^^^

So what if you went to a party and did some crap. At least you didn't end up with a case of rectal prolapse. I'd say that is a win right there. Oddly enough I had been drinking a lot earlier in the evening and I now cannot go to sleep.

[Dorothy Wood]

you should tell your mom about that next time she asks you to fold up the futon


oh no, she'd just start crying and say, "you're just like your father!" and slap me.

ahhh, the life of a child borne out of the unholy union of a puritan and a heathen.

[mikizee]

fuckin heathens

[gbsuey]

i read yesterday,on the front of a magazine,that Kerry Katona(a "celebrity" in this country who is famous for fuck all besides her car-crash life-oh and she was awarded celebrity mother of the year once despite being a cokehead) won't have to wean her new baby off coke. I think she deserves a hearty round of applause-well done Kerry. And maybe she could win that award again. Didn't read the actual article-i'd rather have eaten my tongue

[cookiepuss]

Laptop? whatever happened to doing coke off a mirror or glass table?:rolleyes:

I did it on occasion and it was super fun. in fact if you put it right in front of me right now I couldn't promise you I wouldn't do it. and that's the reason I stear clear of people who use it. I don't want a know where it is or how to get it.

we had a friend in college who developed quite a problem. he'd just finished doing a line and looked us right in the eye and told us He had already quit and he wasn't high. Ugly. ugly. ugly.

[abcdefz]

"That shit makes you lie."

--John Lee Hooker (I think)


Try using a CD case; they're pretty handy.

Eh -- coke. It just made me grind my teeth and it'd wear off really fast and I'd get sleepy.

Benzedrine is something else altogether, and the orgasms are fantastic. (y)

[na§tee]

you see, i know it is an attractive drug. scott has described it as a "constant orgasm" - and you can't fault that, right? but seeing the things it can do to people when they are constantly searching for an (unnatural) constant high.. man. upsetting.

and yeah, cookie. the reason i was pissed was that there was a wealth of other surfaces for him to do it off, but he choice to actively close my laptop and do it off the cover. rather than the table it was on, the books or magazines spread around it. the numerous mirrors he has in his room. etc etc.

[gbsuey]

it's just too more-ish. and i too poor! an occasional nice but i've lost a lot of good people to drugs so in real life i steer clear

[abcdefz]

I've never spent a cent on coke in my life. A friend I had dealt it, and he'd have it out at poker games. My standard line when he
offered me some was, "You know I'm never, ever going to buy any of this from you, right?" and he'd say it was cool, so I'd have some.

My thing was really pot. I'm already racing in real life -- I want to chill the fuck out.

[MC Moot]

"You be doing nose candy on the Bowie coke mirror,my girl asked for some but I pretended not to hear her..."

Remember back in the day when you went to fair and coke mirrors with band logos were the prize at "games of skill"?...like ACDC,Zeppelin,Stones,Etc,Etc...I was too young to realize that was what they were for...the other horror story that comes to mind is the nose bleeds after a couple of grams...sometimes when I'm riding my bike in traffic the exhaust from cars can give me flashbacks of it all...about a year and a half ago after a pub night a friend had about 4 small lines and we went back to my place and did them...and I was right back there all again,instantly..very scary...like call your guy up,NOW!...never again...

[marsdaddy]

At senior prom, we pulled the rear-view mirror off the rental car. Then we looked down and realized our patent leather shoes were "perfect". Luckily, we thought better of it, and used a coffee table. Stupid high schoolers.

[na§tee]

people are going to think i live with people who do coke all the time, but it's not like that. for some reason it has been happening more regularly though - i think it's because of the presence of a new 'friend' in their lives. anyway.

it was someone's birthday on friday, and a bunch of people came back to my flat to partake in booze/shove coke up their nose. the noise woke me up at like 5am so i went into the kitchen to give them stern looks and get a drink. it was just eight people talking into the middle of the table. just wah wah wah wah wah. word vomit. no-one listening, a constant stream of AUDIO, AUDIO COKE, TALK ABOUT MEEEEE ME MEEEEE into the middle. i wish i had taken a video.

and last night.. last night it was my other flatmate's final show in a play she is in at the moment, so her and the cast came over to celebrate. champagne and fizzy red wine was had. oh. crying and vomiting simultaneously with my hangover this morning - not pretty. christ, who invented sparkling red wine? stick some bubbles in red wine and it is a recipe for tannin-binge hangover central.

anyway, actors are the fucking worse. this new friend who has been hanging around who is in the play, he had coke and pills (ecstacy) that he was keen on getting down before going off to a club or something. my flatmate initially just wanted to get drunk. she recovered from cancer about five years ago, but she is always worried about her health. she rushed herself off to a doctor the other day because she thought she was having a heart attack (it was just heat stroke or something). she gets frequent panic attacks as a result of all the chemo and what not.

so i think it is a BAD IDEA for someone in her condition to be taking a combination of pills and coke and i tell her this, but she does it anyway after getting pretty much bullied by this person into doing it. i stop drinking at around this point. i think it is a shitty idea to do it in any condition, tbh, but the other people are strangers and i don't really care what they do to their bodies. her, i do. i tell her, she doesn't listen. anyway, after an hour or so she gets up to go to the door and collapses with a THUD on the floor. collapses. she is lying there unmoving in a heap. everyone rushes to help her.

SHE WAS JOKING. HA HA HA HA she LOLs. oh, gotcha! i'm just playing with you guys! oooh look, you all came to help me!

we do not LOL.

we are all very angry at her. i should get some new friends.

[TAL]

I'll be your friend :)

[marsdaddy]

i should get some new friends. Don't worry, if they keep up the pace, you'll be rid of the old friends, soon.

[gbsuey]

jesus-if she ever does that again chuck a bucket of water over her. out of the toilet.

i've never been a big partaker of chems-but a lot of my friends are(or were) pretty huge drug fiends so i got to see the funny shit they did when totally twatted-also been to a few funerals:(

my friend was cycling across a really bumpy field after doing a shit load of ketamine-falls off the bike and when she goes to pick it up-it's not there because there was no bike!! nice.

also-another aquaintance(didn't know him too well)decided as it was his birthday he'd "treat" himself to a wee shot of smack-mmmm lovely-so he overdoses and whilst his girlfriend and our friends are dragging him around trying to keep the blood moving-someone pours a butt of water over him,only it's diesel oil,not water. hahahahaha-happy birthday dickhead

i have,sadly,loads of these stories-oh yeah this is how stoopid i was many years ago-i had some lsd stored in our fridge(Yes-at my parents home)and then it totally disappeared. Fuck says me and i guess it got thrown awat as rubbish coz i watched my parents for days and they seemed ok to me!.
:p

jinkies- i just read that last bit back-what was i thinking???

[venusvenus123]

not to be an arse claire, but if i was a young woman suffering/recovering from cancer i might want some escape with ecstacy and coke! she seems like she has a better excuse to indulge than the rest of us.

[na§tee]

hrrmm. i don't know. oh, she's cleared now - the cancer was a few years back.

i asked her this once. i was wondering now, post-cancer, if she ever wants to have a uber-healthy carrot juice-and-hummus sort of lifestyle. jogs at 6am. peppermint tea and evening yoga. all that jive. because having been so close to potential death, now she wants to keep her body in tip-top condition.

obviously, she was like naaaah. i don't really think it has changed her ethos that much. i guess she does have more of a 'fuckit.. life's too short' sort of mentality now, and fair enough if she wants to have a good time doing whatever drugs she wants to, but just don't take the piss by pretending you've dropped down dead infront of your mates. follow whatever high you like - just not at the expense of other people.

oh well, she's an actor. i guess she really just couldn't resist.

[venusvenus123]

she was also off her tits when she did it. no excuse tho i know!:p

[Lex Diamonds]

It's your life, live it however you wanna. Marijuana is everywhere, where was you brought up?

If I could take it all back now, I wouldn't. I would've did more shit that people said that I shouldn't.

[BangkokB]

In Coca Rista you could get an 8Ball for about $30USD and it was pure rocketfuel. While I was there my MO was I'd typically get drunk then go outside from the Horseshoe casino and hop into any taxi and say lets go get some Coca. And the journey would begin there~Which was usually more fun than doing it. That includes the US as well as CR. I've been in some outrageously dangerous situations while scoring. The difference between the types of characters that you'd meet buying Coke from buying Crack is staggering

The Rule of Thumb for me is I hate it: There is nothing worse than a coke jones, the teeth grinding that turns into a migraine and it makes me stutter so I'm not much of a fan.

But having said that I will go on record saying that I LOVE DOING LINES THEN GAMBLING. That is Bliss. Roulette and Black Jack while Snowblind is Phenomenal. Haven't had the opportunity to do that since I've moved back to BKK and I don't have any plans in the future to ever go back to CR but that was the highlight for me.

To Each Their Own

[marsdaddy]

i don't really think it has changed her ethos that much. i guess she does have more of a 'fuckit.. life's too short' sort of mentality now, and fair enough if she wants to have a good time doing whatever drugs she wants to...This came up for me when my blood condition almost exploded my liver. As I recovered, I was glad to be alive, and convinced I was going to "change my lifestyle." The thing is, my "lifestyle" didn't cause the blood condition, I was already living fairly healthy, and I liked my previous lifestyle -- as a whole -- before I got sick.

Its not like your friend's cancer was caused by her ethos. And LIFE IS TOO SHORT! Why spend any time trying to undo the past?

I'm trying to keep in mind the here and now, and live that way. It doesn't involve any drugs or acting, though.

[BangkokB]

You shouldn't ostracize acting Mars...I could visualize you giving Matt Damon a run for his $

[marsdaddy]

I could visualize you giving Matt Damon a run for his $I'm not sure about that -- Bourne Optimization?! But I could take the doughy Affleck!