View Full Version : why did karl marx only drink herbal tea?
because proper tea is theft
Kid Presentable
06-17-2008, 09:59 PM
haha gold
Dorothy Wood
06-17-2008, 10:03 PM
puns are funs.
Echewta
06-17-2008, 10:48 PM
Does this have something to do with Brad Pitt and the rabbit being chased by the daags and all that jazz?
nope, nothing to do with that
paul jones
06-18-2008, 01:20 AM
thanks Bob, I will use this joke to get the ladies into bed(y)
na§tee
06-18-2008, 03:40 AM
ahahaha good stuff, good stuff! :)
Pres Zount
06-18-2008, 05:11 AM
Why didn't the life savers rescue the drowning hippie?
Because he was too far out, man.
I've been recycling that one all week.
HEIRESS
06-18-2008, 11:11 AM
Im so throwing both those jokes out at some point during work today. thanks boys.
actually check that, I forgot Im playing hookie today.
I love unplanned "fuck work" days.
abcdefz
06-18-2008, 11:12 AM
Here's one:
Q: Why does Padster cry after sex?
A: The mace.
Echewta
06-18-2008, 11:49 AM
You had me laughing at the question alone ABCDEFzzzzzz
Why didn't the life savers rescue the drowning hippie?
Because he was too far out, man.
lol
Lex Diamonds
07-08-2008, 07:06 PM
Wait, wait, hold on! I've got one!
Q: What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you? :confused:
A: NACHO CHEESE!
Drederick Tatum
07-09-2008, 01:22 AM
A man walks into a bar and asks for a double entendre, so the bar maid gave him one.
Drederick Tatum
07-09-2008, 01:23 AM
Why do elephants have big ears?
Because Noddy wouldn't pay the ransom.
gbsuey
07-09-2008, 04:23 AM
ok....this is fairly lame but i think it's my favourite joke
what did one snowman say to the other ???
can you smell carrots?
Two Parrots sat on a perch, one parrot says to the other 'can you smell fish'?
Guy Incognito
07-09-2008, 05:18 AM
cant think of any but i found this if you want a laugh -some good uns on here.
http://www.beastieboys.com/bbs/showthread.php?t=63862
Guy Incognito
07-09-2008, 07:24 AM
because proper tea is theft
Oh my god - I have just told this joke to the 6 other people on my department at work and got the following responses:
3 x "Who is KArl Marx"
2 x " What has drinking tea got to do with Karl Marx"
1 x " I dont get it but I know who karl marx is - he invented facism"!!!
For fucks sake - i wasnt expecting belly laughs as i thought it was a smiler of a gag but i expected at least one of them to get it. One of them is 19 so i forgave him cos he is as thick as concrete milkshake but the others are all in late 20's early 30's. Told them all to read more.
Junker
07-09-2008, 07:33 AM
Oh my god - I have just told this joke to the 6 other people on my department at work and got the following responses:
3 x "Who is KArl Marx"
2 x " What has drinking tea got to do with Karl Marx"
1 x " I dont get it but I know who karl marx is - he invented facism"!!!
For fucks sake - i wasnt expecting belly laughs as i thought it was a smiler of a gag but i expected at least one of them to get it. One of them is 19 so i forgave him cos he is as thick as concrete milkshake but the others are all in late 20's early 30's. Told them all to read more.
I didn't get it either. :(
Actually I didn't get any of the jokes above.
mines a little bit of a thinker.
Guy Incognito
07-09-2008, 09:09 AM
Oh my god - I have just told this joke to the 6 other people on my department at work and got the following responses:
3 x "Who is KArl Marx"
2 x " What has drinking tea got to do with Karl Marx"
1 x " I dont get it but I know who karl marx is - he invented facism"!!!
For fucks sake - i wasnt expecting belly laughs as i thought it was a smiler of a gag but i expected at least one of them to get it. One of them is 19 so i forgave him cos he is as thick as concrete milkshake but the others are all in late 20's early 30's. Told them all to read more.
oh my fucking jesus. I was so disappointed that i decided to ask these buggers a few questions about historical figures that i learnt about at school and got the following answers:
1) Who is Jesse Owens? Best answer: Cowboy?no right answers
2) Who is Fidel Castro? "Famous violinist" no right answers
3) Who is William the Conqueror? Not one of them had a fucking clue.
For fucks sake.
ericlee
07-09-2008, 11:23 AM
a guy's wife gets into a horrible accident and is in the hospital.
The guy goes to the hospital where his wife is and talks to the doctor about her condition.
The doctor says, "she's a vegetable. You'll have to change her diapers, feed her, bathe her"
The guy is crushed, "Oh my god, no".
The doctor then says, "yeah, she may pull out of it, she may not but, in the meantime you'll have to do everything for her."
the guy cries, "Why her, Whyyyy?"
the doctor pats him on the back and says, "just fuckin' wit ya, she's dead!!"
a guy's wife gets into a horrible accident and is in the hospital.
The guy goes to the hospital where his wife is and talks to the doctor about her condition.
The doctor says, "she's a vegetable. You'll have to change her diapers, feed her, bathe her"
The guy is crushed, "Oh my god, no".
The doctor then says, "yeah, she may pull out of it, she may not but, in the meantime you'll have to do everything for her."
the guy cries, "Why her, Whyyyy?"
the doctor pats him on the back and says, "just fuckin' wit ya, she's dead!!"
that right there is funny
AceFace
07-09-2008, 11:40 AM
mines a little bit of a thinker.
i thought it was very funny.
i loved the drowning hippie one, prez zount. already told it to everyone in the office. :)
Freebasser
07-09-2008, 12:19 PM
A message board walks into a secure online server, and the CPU says "Hey, nice threads".
Guy Incognito
07-09-2008, 12:23 PM
if you dont know this one i will be suprised - some kid told me it at the weekend thinking it was the funniest joke ever.
How do you make a snooker table laugh?
Tickle its balls.
Lex Diamonds
07-09-2008, 02:24 PM
I opened the fridge just now and the mayonnaise shouted "CLOSE THE DOOR, I'M DRESSING!"
mate_spawn_die
07-09-2008, 02:32 PM
knock knock
Lyman Zerga
07-09-2008, 03:03 PM
I opened the fridge just now and the mayonnaise shouted "CLOSE THE DOOR, I'M DRESSING!"
rofl
i dont get bob's or the nacho cheese one
taquitos
07-09-2008, 03:22 PM
knock knock
who's there?
QueenAdrock
07-09-2008, 06:27 PM
Lyman, Nacho cheese sounds like "Not your cheese" only slangified.
What does Snoop Dogg use to clean his clothes?
BLEEOTCH
What do you call a rhinocerous crossed with an elephant?
Elephino.
Lex Diamonds
07-09-2008, 06:34 PM
i dont get the nacho cheese one
Imagine an angry black man saying it. (y)
What do you call a rhinocerous crossed with an elephant?
Elephino.
*steals*
Guy Incognito
07-09-2008, 06:37 PM
What does Snoop Dogg use to clean his clothes?
BLEEOTCH
:D
How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
Put it in the microwave until its bill withers.
What do you call a rhinocerous crossed with an elephant?
Elephino.
Muppets Tonight was sooooo good.
venusvenus123
07-10-2008, 04:16 AM
Imagine an angry black man saying it. (y)
he has to be american too.
love that joke, i'm telling it to my son tonight.
all pretty funny though. :)
Lyman Zerga
07-10-2008, 06:53 AM
Imagine an angry black man saying it. (y)
theres no black people in my world :) but i get it now
i still dont get the karl marx one :confused: i mean the word 'theft' makes me laugh but thats probably not the point here
Pres Zount
07-10-2008, 07:37 AM
Proper tea is theft.
Property is theft.
Lyman Zerga
07-10-2008, 08:45 AM
lol @ theft
gbsuey
07-12-2008, 02:26 AM
After the Celebrity Big Brother racism uproar surrounding Jade Goodys behaviour towards Indian housemate Shilpa Shetty, there were reports of hundreds of effigy-burnings occuring in India.
Turns out they were just pig roasts.
b-grrrlie
07-12-2008, 05:28 PM
A duck is standing at the side of the road waiting to cross. A chicken walks by and says, "I wouldn't bother pal, you'll never hear the end of it"
LongDuckDong
03-10-2009, 11:30 AM
Hi, guys. Don't forget the dogfood bully-sack.
did you just search for duck?
easy 3
03-10-2009, 11:55 AM
Why did the baker's hands smell?
Because he kneaded a shit.
taquitos
03-10-2009, 11:59 AM
did you just search for duck?
yeah, but this is a pretty good thread anyway.
Nuzzolese
03-10-2009, 12:21 PM
What did the zero say to the eight?
"nice belt"
roosta
03-10-2009, 12:24 PM
What's the first sign of madness?
suggs coming up the driveway.
marsdaddy
03-10-2009, 01:42 PM
An alligator walks into a bar and orders a beer,
Bartender says,
"Sorry, we don't serve alligators,"
Alligator says,
"Get me a beer or I'll eat that woman there at the bar,"
Bartender says,
"Look pal, we don't serve alligators!"
So the alligator eats the woman, and says,
"Now, will you get me a beer?!"
Bartender says,
"Sorry, we don't alligators, and we don't serve drug addicts, either. That's a bar bitch you ate."
Guy Incognito
03-10-2009, 02:14 PM
What's the first sign of madness?
suggs coming up the driveway.
:D:D(y)
checkyourprez
03-10-2009, 05:46 PM
haha dude i read this when you made this thread a year or so ago or whenever it was, and i was like what the fuck that joke sucks.
but it wasnt until i asked my mom if she got it a second ago, as i said it out loud, i got it.
actually not a bad joke. (y)
Drederick Tatum
03-10-2009, 06:21 PM
What's the first sign of madness?
suggs coming up the driveway.
quality.
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