Pregnancy Pact

[yeahwho]

As summer vacation begins, 17 girls at Gloucester High School are expecting babies — more than four times the number of pregnancies the 1,200-student school had last year. […] All it took was a few simple questions before nearly half the expecting students, none older than 16, confessed to making a pact to get pregnant and raise their babies together. Then the story got worse. “We found out one of the fathers is a 24-year-old homeless guy,” the principal says, shaking his head.

The vasectomy in 8th grade sounds like a good idea guys. HOLY DIAPER RASH BATMAN (http://www.thebostonchannel.com/news/16657235/detail.html):eek:

[-T-]

Sometimes I wonder.

[TurdBerglar]

females are just getting nuttier and nuttier...

[Yetra Flam]

i guess pregnancy must be all kinds of awesome fun

[Bob]

can't believe i didn't get laid in high school

[icy manipulator]

fucking poms. duxking hell, do school girls idolise vicky pollard these days?!

[ms.peachy]

I read about this earlier today. Slightly different article, a bit less sensationalistic than this one, but I just found it very sad. The principal of the school (I believe it was) was talking about the girls involved, and how (unsurprisingly) generally they were girls with very little self esteem and not very good marks, unstable home lives, etc. It seems to me that what these girls were trying to create for themselves, in their own naive way, was an extended family.

[na§tee]

fucking poms.
gloucester in massachusetts, icy, not england.

i'm almost 25 and i think i'm way too young to have kids. i don't want to have any for at least another 10 years, i think, and i think that's becoming more and more common, here anyway, for women to wait until their mid 30s to have children. 17 years old? fuck that shit. i blame jamie lynn! (i josh)

[abcdefz]

It's like: pregnancy for young girls is like going to jail for young boys. Some idiotic rite of passage.

[ToucanSpam]

I bet they all saw Juno and though WOW PREGNANCY IS EASY.

[ms.peachy]

It's like: pregnancy for young girls is like going to jail for young boys. Some idiotic rite of passage.

I wouldn't say 'going to jail' is the parallel, more like 'joining a gang'. It's the wanting to be a part of something. I'm sure we've all heard stories from gang members who say the gang is "like a family". And it's not so much a rite of passage as an attempt to fill an emotional void. In the absence of an actual functioning family network, young people seek out whatever model might be available to them. It's not rocket science.

[abcdefz]

I bet they all saw Juno and though WOW PREGNANCY IS EASY.



AND CYNICALLY HIP

[abcdefz]

I wouldn't say 'going to jail' is the parallel, more like 'joining a gang'. It's the wanting to be a part of something. I'm sure we've all heard stories from gang members who say the gang is "like a family". And it's not so much a rite of passage as an attempt to fill an emotional void. In the absence of an actual functioning family network, young people seek out whatever model might be available to them. It's not rocket science.


You might be right. But I'm always shocked when I hear young people on the bus or wherever bragging about having been in jail, telling jail
stories, etc. Around here, I don't think a week goes by without me hearing this stuff. It's bizarre to me.

[NoFenders]

This is just a sign as to where our society is heading in this "Me" world. None of these girls (or should I say most) have any clue what they're in for, and never once took into account that they are bringing a life into this world.

"Many of the young women don't see a lot of direction or purpose in their lives."

Great, so now we can double that number right away. I hope and pray that people like this wake up once the baby is here, but knowing from experience, most don't. Just a shame.

I blame it mostly on Hollywood and the media.
:cool:

[abcdefz]

I wouldn't say 'going to jail' is the parallel, more like 'joining a gang'. It's the wanting to be a part of something. I'm sure we've all heard stories from gang members who say the gang is "like a family". And it's not so much a rite of passage as an attempt to fill an emotional void. In the absence of an actual functioning family network, young people seek out whatever model might be available to them. It's not rocket science.


I think I see the misunderstanding. I meant girls in general, not these specific girls.

[instigator7022]

They should watch more Maury

[hpdrifter]

I am surprised that anyone is surprised about this. The only difference is that they're honest about getting pregnant on purpose because they don't know what else to do with themselves and they're organized.

There's a highschool in my home town known as the pregnancy high school for the same reason. Its been that way for 20 years.

[NoFenders]

I am surprised that anyone is surprised about this. The only difference is that they're honest about getting pregnant on purpose because they don't know what else to do with themselves and they're organized.

There's a highschool in my home town known as the pregnancy high school for the same reason. Its been that way for 20 years.

Every year there's 17 girls expecting?? And it's been that way for 20 years??

Also, they consider themselves organized?? An organized person knows exactly what to do with themself. Or do you mean they oragnized the whole deal. Either way, it's fucked up.

What's even more scary is that you're suprised that anyone is surprised. I've lived in Chicago all my life, and I've seen just about everything. I knew plenty of girls who were pregnant in high school and most of them were not thrilled about it. I see a ton of selfishnes in these people. Not exactly the type of person/people who deserve a baby.

:cool:

[yeahwho]

Interesting responses to this story, being in high school and getting pregnant accidentally or unintentionally must be one of the toughest and most lonely times in any young girls life.

The Pregnancy Pact is just very sad, if these teens are already having esteem and family problems, being a single teenage mother makes joining the Marines and going through boot camp look like twiddly winks.

The group mentality is so bizarre.

[hpdrifter]

I'm not saying its okay. Organized in the sense that they got together as a group.

Yes, I'd say that many girls in the whole student body.

[Guy Incognito]

fucking poms. duxking hell, do school girls idolise vicky pollard these days?!

gloucester in massachusetts, icy, not england.




If it was in england then all the mothers would have westlife CD's by now;)

[yeahwho]

I knew plenty of girls who were pregnant in high school and most of them were not thrilled about it. I see a ton of selfishnes in these people. Not exactly the type of person/people who deserve a baby.

:cool:

Selfish? well that selfishness will be pretty much cured within the next two years. From my understanding babies can be pretty demanding.

[abcdefz]

It's only demanding if you love them. (http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/bestoftv/2008/06/20/ng.woman.abandons.boy.cnn)



That woman is nominated for Most Annoying Commentator Ever.

[ms.peachy]

I see a ton of selfishnes in these people. Not exactly the type of person/people who deserve a baby.


I think that's really quite harsh. Yes of course it's a selfish thing they've done - duh, that's not exactly an insightful observation. But I think you are failing to appreciate that these girls are just that - girls. They are making childish decisions, because they are children. It's not about who 'deserves' a baby and who doesn't. What every one of these girls does deserve though is love, and self respect, and hope, and because they don't see that in their lives, they set about to create it. I don't in a million years think what they've done is a good thing, but I do understand it. They don't need scorn and contempt - I should imagine they have already seen enough of it in their young lives, which is how they have ended up at this point. I work with girls like these for a living, I see it all too often unfortunately. If you could meet some of them just as individual young people as I do, maybe you could see that, despite whatever front they may put on to the world, they are fragile, often very sweet girls, who are just so desperate to be loved.

[NoFenders]

Selfish? well that selfishness will be pretty much cured within the next two years. From my understanding babies can be pretty demanding.

You'd think so, but I'm sure that most of them will be taken care of by Grandma or somebody else while they go out. And I'm pretty sure that will be the case for a very long time.

:cool:

[mate_spawn_die]

gross.

about the babies not the lucky homeless guy.

[Bob]

You'd think so, but I'm sure that most of them will be taken care of by Grandma or somebody else while they go out. And I'm pretty sure that will be the case for a very long time.

:cool:

you're such an expert! and without even having met them! you should run for office or something with the amount that you know, it's crazy

[NoFenders]

I think that's really quite harsh. Yes of course it's a selfish thing they've done - duh, that's not exactly an insightful observation.

Harsh it may be. But it's very true for most of them. Insightful observations are pretty hard to come by in this scenario.

But I think you are failing to appreciate that these girls are just that - girls. They are making childish decisions, because they are children. It's not about who 'deserves' a baby and who doesn't. What every one of these girls does deserve though is love, and self respect, and hope, and because they don't see that in their lives, they set about to create it.

Are you reading a different story than I am??? I didn't hear one quote from one girl saying this. You're assuming this right? Well, I assume that it's attention getting and will be a huge mistake for them and the baby. Actually, I'm not as concerned for them nearly as much as I am the baby.

I don't in a million years think what they've done is a good thing, but I do understand it. They don't need scorn and contempt - I should imagine they have already seen enough of it in their young lives, which is how they have ended up at this point.
And whose fault is that??? Is it their parents fault, probably. If this is where it's from, why would they do the same thing to a innocent baby, that's been done to them. Do you truely beleive they are/were thinking of the baby, or just for themself at that one point in time.They wanted to give the baby love because they weren't?? Or they thought the baby would love them?? Where do they go from here??

I work with girls like these for a living, I see it all too often unfortunately. If you could meet some of them just as individual young people as I do, maybe you could see that, despite whatever front they may put on to the world, they are fragile, often very sweet girls, who are just so desperate to be loved.

Understood, we all are. This isn't like most cases from what is stated. Yeah, most commonly that is the case. This has nothing of that sort in it so far. It would be interesting to hear from one of the girls. This is a attention grabbing scene. Nothing more, nothing less. And people who have children just so they can feel loved is pathetic. They put a child in this world to do one thing, take care of their selfish needs and what they want, attention.

Again, sorry if I'm harsh, but I grew up in a neighborhood that had these girls and even guys running everywhere. You might work with them, but I lived with them. It's all about them. Yes, that's sad that they cant get love at home, but they are not doing anything to help the problem by having a child that most will neglect.

"The love we take will be equal to the love we make"

:cool:

[NoFenders]

you're such an expert! and without even having met them! you should run for office or something with the amount that you know, it's crazy

And you wonder why ya never got laid in high school

:cool:

[yeahwho]

I think that's really quite harsh. Yes of course it's a selfish thing they've done - duh, that's not exactly an insightful observation. But I think you are failing to appreciate that these girls are just that - girls. They are making childish decisions, because they are children. It's not about who 'deserves' a baby and who doesn't. What every one of these girls does deserve though is love, and self respect, and hope, and because they don't see that in their lives, they set about to create it. I don't in a million years think what they've done is a good thing, but I do understand it. They don't need scorn and contempt - I should imagine they have already seen enough of it in their young lives, which is how they have ended up at this point. I work with girls like these for a living, I see it all too often unfortunately. If you could meet some of them just as individual young people as I do, maybe you could see that, despite whatever front they may put on to the world, they are fragile, often very sweet girls, who are just so desperate to be loved.

Perfect post. Everything you wrote could only be gleamed from actual involvement with these girls.

[NoFenders]

Ms Peachy, you're involved with these girls???

:cool:

[ms.peachy]

Are you reading a different story than I am??? I didn't hear one quote from one girl saying this. You're assuming this right?

I don't know which story you read. I am making that statement based on one of the several articles about this situation I have read today, in which one of the school officials talks about the girls involved, their family backgrounds, their lack of achievment, etc.

Well, I assume that it's attention getting and will be a huge mistake for them and the baby. Actually, I'm not as concerned for them nearly as much as I am the baby.

Oh another brilliant observation. I think you should be concerned for them AS WELL AS for the babies, because they are a package deal now, brother. There is no single better predictor for success in life than a mother's level of education and achievement, so if you want to spit on these girls and keep them down out of some misguided sense of moral certitude, you are merely condemning their children to low expectations.

And whose fault is that??? Is it their parents fault, probably. If this is where it's from, why would they do the same thing to a innocent baby, that's been done to them. Do you truely beleive they are/were thinking of the baby, or just for themself at that one point in time.They wanted to give the baby love because they weren't?? Or they thought the baby would love them?? Where do they go from here??
I don't really see why you're having a hard time grasping this concept. Because they are children themselves, and quite likely emotionally stunted ones at that, they don't have the capacity for the foresight that would allow them to recognise that they are part of the perpetuation of a cycle. Can't see the forest for the trees, in other words. When you ask "are they thinking of themselves or the baby", it's the wrong question, because it's a moot point - they don't see themselves and the babies as separate beings really. And yes, they do it because they want love. It really is that simple, even though the issues it raises are very complex.


Understood, we all are. This isn't like most cases from what is stated. Yeah, most commonly that is the case. This has nothing of that sort in it so far. It would be interesting to hear from one of the girls. This is a attention grabbing scene. Nothing more, nothing less. And people who have children just so they can feel loved is pathetic. They put a child in this world to do one thing, take care of their selfish needs and what they want, attention.

*sigh* yet another brilliant observation. I don't know how many times I can agree with you that yes it is selfish and yes, in its way it is pathetic - but what is really pathetic to me is how, rather than feel compassion and empathy for these young girls who clearly have not been well served in this life by the adults around them, people like yourself would rather stigmatise them and try to make them feel even more shit about their lives. I think that's sick.

Again, sorry if I'm harsh, but I grew up in a neighborhood that had these girls and even guys running everywhere. You might work with them, but I lived with them. It's all about them. Yes, that's sad that they cant get love at home, but they are not doing anything to help the problem by having a child that most will neglect.

yeah um again - DUH. So what are you doing to have the situation be any different?

"The love we take will be equal to the love we make"

Do you seriously not get that that is actually what these girls think (however wrongly) they were trying to do?



(As an aside, you do know that using that :cool: icon after every point in a discussion like this just makes you look kind of assy, right?)

[Yetra Flam]

yeah, i'm sorry. i'm finding it pretty hard to feel any compassion or sympathy for these girls.

[ms.peachy]

yeah, i'm sorry. i'm finding it pretty hard to feel any compassion or sympathy for these girls.

Well you know, that's your call and it's unfortunate (IMO) that you feel that way.

I do wish I could introduce you folks to some of the girls I have worked with, so you could get some sense of the real young people behind the headlines and statistics. It makes my heart heavy.

[NoFenders]

I don't know which story you read. I am making that statement based on one of the several articles about this situation I have read today, in which one of the school officials talks about the girls involved, their family backgrounds, their lack of achievment, etc.

I'd like to read that. See, I was going off the link that was provided. I didn't realise there was 10 other stories.

Oh another brilliant observation. I think you should be concerned for them AS WELL AS for the babies, because they are a package deal now, brother. There is no single better predictor for success in life than a mother's level of education and achievement, so if you want to spit on these girls and keep them down out of some misguided sense of moral certitude, you are merely condemning their children to low expectations.

I'm not spitting on them, I'm spitting on society as a whole. A society that can't handle their own problems so they make them somebody elses. You honestly think all 17 babies will be handled by their own mother??? You work this deal you say, how many actually do??

I don't really see why you're having a hard time grasping this concept. Because they are children themselves, and quite likely emotionally stunted ones at that, they don't have the capacity for the foresight that would allow them to recognise that they are part of the perpetuation of a cycle. Can't see the forest for the trees, in other words. When you ask "are they thinking of themselves or the baby", it's the wrong question, because it's a moot point - they don't see themselves and the babies as separate beings really. And yes, they do it because they want love. It really is that simple, even though the issues it raises are very complex.

Ms.Peachy, I think you're missing a point that 17 girls did this at the same time for the same reason (so they say). So this is a public protest for better parenting?? If so, that's actually a fucking genius move. If not, it's not as deep as you'd like to think.


*sigh* yet another brilliant observation. I don't know how many times I can agree with you that yes it is selfish and yes, in its way it is pathetic - but what is really pathetic to me is how, rather than feel compassion and empathy for these young girls who clearly have not been well served in this life by the adults around them, people like yourself would rather stigmatise them and try to make them feel even more shit about their lives. I think that's sick.

You've got me all wrong, I don't like to keep people down. As a matter of fact I often help people get back up. But the only way is for them to do something that's not all about them.

yeah um again - DUH. So what are you doing to have the situation be any different?

Anything would be better than helping the probelem get worse and more widespread. To sympathise with these girls is one thing. I think we all do. But that wont help them or the baby. Yeah, it's a bad sceanario. Yeah, it shouldn't happen, but it does. The only way for kids like this to have any life for themselves is to get it themselves. Think of how a young girl reading this would take it. If she only read your posts, I think she would take it as ok to do these things since it gets her voice heard. That's not helping anyone. Yeah, there's reasons for everything that happens in this world. But it's nobody's fault but your own. Once you learn that for yourself you become a stronger person.

Do you seriously not get that that is actually what these girls think (however wrongly) they were trying to do?
Maybe 2 or 3, but all 17??? I mean, it's not some lonely girl in a hall way. It's 17 that actually did this. How many decided not to??? There had to be at least 10 others involved that didn't



(As an aside, you do know that using that :cool: icon after every point in a discussion like this just makes you look kind of assy, right?)

I am assy

:cool:

[yeahwho]

If ever given to a spare hour and a half I highly recommend this film. It was actually filmed by a guy who lives down the block from me.

How can she finish school, get basketball taken care of and be a mommy? --Talk-show caller

The Heart of the Game (http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20060615/REVIEWS/60606008/1023)

[Yetra Flam]

i'm from an area where teenage pregnancies are pretty commonplace and nothing to be shocked about. although i have not experienced it directly, i'm not completely sheltered or isolated from this reality. i certainly don't need to meet any more of these young women to get a sense of reality.

sure, these girls are purposely getting pregnant because of circumstance, but i feel like that whole attitude of "poor little girls just need some love" is just rewarding and encouraging behaviour that is essentially careless and selfish. someone or something needs to be tougher on them, so they can grow up and realise that yeah, life kinda does suck and it is difficult to be a young female. Lots and lots of people feel like they aren't loved and they're not adequate.
i just don't think coddling people does anything at all.

[yeahwho]

The opposite side of this coin is how about guys over 50, many pushing 80 who get trophy wives, impregnate them then die?

Is that right?

[NoFenders]

i'm from an area where teenage pregnancies are pretty commonplace and nothing to be shocked about. although i have not experienced it directly, i'm not completely sheltered or isolated from this reality. i certainly don't need to meet any more of these young women to get a sense of reality.

sure, these girls are purposely getting pregnant because of circumstance, but i feel like that whole attitude of "poor little girls just need some love" is just rewarding and encouraging behaviour that is essentially careless and selfish. someone or something needs to be tougher on them, so they can grow up and realise that yeah, life kinda does suck and it is difficult to be a young female. Lots and lots of people feel like they aren't loved and they're not adequate.
i just don't think coddling people does anything at all.

You say it better. I just rant.

:cool:

[NoFenders]

The opposite side of this coin is how about guys over 50, many pushing 80 who get trophy wives, impregnate them then die?

Is that right?


Is there 17 of them doing it at the same time?

Anyway, yeah, why not. They aren't knockin up teenagers. Besides, most guys getting trophy wives have trophy bank accounts that will provide for the children. Now what that mother does with it is something totally different.

:cool:

[insertnamehere]

I had an acquaintance in high school go who got pregnant on purpose because she thought it would get her married and out of her parent's house. EVERYONE tried to talk her into either adoption or abortion but she wanted to keep it. Then the guy left her, she dropped out of school, and the baby turned out to have multiple birth defects. Poor girl. I sympathize but at the same time it's like... wait ONE MORE year and go to college and make a decent life for yourself!

These girls who are apparently doing it for love and companionship.... there's 17 of them! Couldn't they fulfill each other's needs for love and friendship? It seems like they must be pretty close to make a pregnancy pact.

Anyone of high school age should have sense enough to realize that not only is this a bad idea for all the obvious reasons, but also that having a baby is a lifelong commitment that you're making (irresponsible) to deal with relatively temporary problems.

[yeahwho]

Is there 17 of them doing it at the same time?

Anyway, yeah, why not. They aren't knockin up teenagers. Besides, most guys getting trophy wives have trophy bank accounts that will provide for the children. Now what that mother does with it is something totally different.

:cool:

So having a Father is really just a monetary thing? Is it irresponsible at age 75 to procreate? Money only goes so far, the whole idea one would think is to make this world a better place, with a stable family. The idea of having kids is to raise kids, therefore I feel that perhaps the father who will die while his child is a toddler (knowingly so) is just as culpable, if not more, than the teen who pawns her child off on her parents.

[ms.peachy]

These girls who are apparently doing it for love and companionship.... there's 17 of them! Couldn't they fulfill each other's needs for love and friendship? It seems like they must be pretty close to make a pregnancy pact.


If you read more of the story, the girls who made this 'pact' talked about things like having a group baby shower, raising their children together, a lot of sort of 'communal' stuff. Of course you or I as sensible, adult people can see that this is all very pie-in-the-sky stuff, but to me it is very revealing of the fact that, as I said earlier, they are looking to create for themselves something of an extended family. Of course (to us) this is a ridiculous way to go about it, but again, we are talking about young girls here, and kind of desperate ones at that.

[Bob]

Is there 17 of them doing it at the same time?

Anyway, yeah, why not. They aren't knockin up teenagers. Besides, most guys getting trophy wives have trophy bank accounts that will provide for the children. Now what that mother does with it is something totally different.

:cool:

haha yeah, fuck those irresponsible bitches

[NoFenders]

So having a Father is really just a monetary thing? Is it irresponsible at age 75 to procreate? Money only goes so far, the whole idea one would think is to make this world a better place, with a stable family. The idea of having kids is to raise kids, therefore I feel that perhaps the father who will die while his child is a toddler (knowingly so) is just as culpable, if not more, than the teen who pawns her child off on her parents.


This "side of the coin" is much smaller than the sire we were originally talking about. Teen preganancy and elderly folk reproducing are very different numbers.

Seeing your response though, you'd think you'd agree with my previous points.

:cool:

[NoFenders]

haha yeah, fuck those irresponsible bitches

Your words, not mine.

:cool:

[cookiepuss]

I blame it mostly on Hollywood and the media.
:cool:


nah, I'd blame it on a dysfunctional society.

[TurdBerglar]

i've noticed that there's this huge trend with young females who just think that there's more to life than just going to school, getting a job then retiring. that's life. that's all it is. they think they have it bad and should deserve more so they develop this type of depression. they think what around them is horrible when it's really acceptable and completely normal and shit like this happens. and there's the parents that just don't do anything anymore. they just move their kids to a nice neighborhood and think that's all they need to do. when their kids show signs of bad and destructive behavior they just seem to deny it and put themselves in this fantasy world. then some other people come along and just give them(parents and the kids) sympathy. this sympathy just feeds the beast. kids don't get slapped into reality anymore. parents just bargain with them and give them what they want. they have no sense of reality.

[russhie]

I think that's really quite harsh. Yes of course it's a selfish thing they've done - duh, that's not exactly an insightful observation. But I think you are failing to appreciate that these girls are just that - girls. They are making childish decisions, because they are children. It's not about who 'deserves' a baby and who doesn't. What every one of these girls does deserve though is love, and self respect, and hope, and because they don't see that in their lives, they set about to create it. I don't in a million years think what they've done is a good thing, but I do understand it. They don't need scorn and contempt - I should imagine they have already seen enough of it in their young lives, which is how they have ended up at this point. I work with girls like these for a living, I see it all too often unfortunately. If you could meet some of them just as individual young people as I do, maybe you could see that, despite whatever front they may put on to the world, they are fragile, often very sweet girls, who are just so desperate to be loved.

I get all that, but it still - it seems like a bunch of excuses. I'm fragile and sweet and desperate for the love and adoration that was absent in my adolescent years, but I also understand that having a baby isn't the answer. Why are girls like this more deserving of understanding and pity because they've made a choice and put themselves in this predicament?

I agree that the last thing they need is to be treated with contempt and disdain, but at seventeen you should bloody well know that no matter what your own desires are, it's incredibly selfish to bring another life into the world when you are not equipped financially and emotionally to deal with it. They're almost adults, for goodness sake, and almost legally allowed to do alot of things. You can't tell me that if these girls had gone on and done it when they were 19, for the same reasons, that people would care anywhere near as much - suddenly, they're idiots for not being more careful, because they're legally adults and therefore more "responsible".

[taquitos]

i was thinking about starting one of these. who's in?

[Videodrome]

i'm in! it will be like hands across america except without holding hands.

[ms.peachy]

I get all that, but it still - it seems like a bunch of excuses. I'm fragile and sweet and desperate for the love and adoration that was absent in my adolescent years, but I also understand that having a baby isn't the answer. Why are girls like this more deserving of understanding and pity because they've made a choice and put themselves in this predicament?

Where exactly did I say they were "more" deserving? More deserving than who? And when did I use the word 'pity'? I don't pity them. I empathise with them. There is a big difference.

I agree that the last thing they need is to be treated with contempt and disdain, but at seventeen you should bloody well know that no matter what your own desires are, it's incredibly selfish to bring another life into the world when you are not equipped financially and emotionally to deal with it. They're almost adults, for goodness sake, and almost legally allowed to do alot of things. You can't tell me that if these girls had gone on and done it when they were 19, for the same reasons, that people would care anywhere near as much - suddenly, they're idiots for not being more careful, because they're legally adults and therefore more "responsible".
They weren't seventeen. There were seventeen girls, almost all of whom were under 16.