Baby makers share your secrets!

[kaiser soze]

Well, looks like my girlfriend and have a sea monkey in our midst and have already started loading up on baby goods.

What are some tricks of the trade to help save some money or your mind?

We have already hit up a ton of yard sales before the nice weather departs and scored mounds of clothes for pennies. Looks like we have 1-3, 3-6 months covered, got a battery operated swing and adjustable high chair for $5 each as well.

[venusvenus123]

wish i could give you some of my stuff!

umm perhaps go on ebay or to charity shops? i know i bought my son loads of his toys/books/puzzles from 2nd hand places.

in england there are lots of sales organised by the national childbirth trust. i'm sure you have such things in your local area.

breastfeeding saves money!

anyway, congrats:)

[funk63]

you seen when a mommy and a daddy love eachother very much..

[ms.peachy]

Hey, congratulations.

First of all, before your baby is born, you and your girlfriend should go out to dinner as often as is reasonable, as well as to the movies, etc. Oh and have as much sex as you can fit into your schedules too.Because you are so, so not going to be doing those things for a long time once it gets here. Also if you can afford it, maybe take a holiday together just the two of you, get away alone together someplace restful and just chill out.

Secondly, listen to all advice that everyone gives you, everything you read, etc. And then take on board the things that make sense to you. You will get lots of conflicting opinions. "Co-sleeping is the worst possible thing you can do!" "Co-sleeping is the best possible thing you can do!" "Formula feeding will give your children problems for life!" "Formula feeding is a perfectly viable option." You will hear it all. The thing to remember is, most of the time when people tell you that something "works", what they are really saying is it worked for them. Whatever it is, it may or may not work for you. It may be worth trying. Or the very idea of it may make you feel uncomfortable. Just thank people for their advice, say you'll think about it, and then do what feels natural for you to do. Some people (and their babies) thrive on a very strict routine. Other families function better with a looser basic framework. You will find the rhythm that works for you.

Lastly, realise that whatever plan you have beforehand, however you have it in your mind you think it's all going to go - it's probably not gonna go like you thought it would. For example, we never planned to co-sleep, we had planned for her to sleep in her own bed straight from the start. And originally, she did. But there came a time when it felt more right for her to be in bed with us. (Mainly, it made it easier to feed her in the night, and we found we just really liked having her with us.) You make these things up as you go along.

[NoFenders]

Clothes - Do exactly what you're doing. Buy second hand stuff if you can find it in good condition. You'll realise later that you'll only dress the baby up in a handful of different outfits. We have so many clothes in our house that never get used. The stuff on top of the drawer gets used, washed, and then placed back on top of the drawer. The stuff on the bottom is never seen, and by the time you actually decide to put in on them, they're too big for it. Clothes can be a huge waste of money.

Diapers - Some things are cool to skimp on, like clothes. But diapers, you get what you pay for. The cheap stuff is cheap in every way. Leaks,don't fit, come off easy, it all goes with cheap diapers. Try and keep an eye on who has sales. Find a brand that fits your little pooper well, and stick with it. They'll be happier, which means you will too.


Babies are not cheap in any way. Figure you'll spend more than you're figuring now. Dr visits, perscriptions, etc will add up quickly.Especially in the first year. Baby food is pretty reasonable. Gerber has some club I think that we signed up for where we got some special price break.
If you don't breast feed (not you personally) always ask the hospital and Dr office for samples of formula. We were once sent home with a garbage bag full of formula. They're small bottles, so good for traveling.

Other than that, I think you guys are on track. Saving money by buying second hand stuff that you know will be forgotten in a year is the best way to go. The same toys and clothes are never around for long, so remember that when you think the new I'm A Little Shit T-shirt selling for $10 is so cute. He/she will wear it once, maybe twice, and then it will be at the bottom of the drawer. Clothes and toys can be the biggest waste. Just get what you need. Besides, people will be stopping over with more toys and clothes. You'll see.

Congratualtions Kaiser, I wish you and your family the absolute best. Kids are the best thing.

However, it's one thing to be a parent, but it doesn't mean anything if you're not parenting.

:cool:

[Guy Incognito]

in england there are lots of sales organised by the national childbirth trust. i'm sure you have such things in your local area.



We bought and sold stuff at these - we didnt find a lot of good stuff but we made a load of money back on some other stuff

we have founf that finding out the sex of the baby at the 2nd scan meant that loads of people were offering us stuff when they knew it was a girl but if they dont know the sex they dont know what they can give you but finding out the sex is only a decision you two can make. I understand people like to be suprised.

As peachy said - take what you want from the advice given.

As a dad a good book to read (if slightly english) is Fatherhood by markus berkmann.

Dont start worrying about loads of future stuff - its a cliche but deal with one thing at a time when baby comes and just be supportive to your missus while she is preggers.

Good luck

May the force be with you and yours.

[ms.peachy]

As a dad a good book to read (if slightly english) is Fatherhood by markus berkmann.


Oh god, yes. Mr.p found this book really funny and helpful. He has since bought copies for 3 other mates who have pregnant partners. Your girlfriend should read it too.

Also, as far as books go - you might already have checked out What to Expect When You're Expecting. I would recommend that you also invest in a copy of What to Expect the First Year. For me, it was invaluable. It's just a great reference guide. It's not a 'parenting book' that promotes a particular philosophy or strategy or anything, it's more just like, I dunno, like an encyclopedia of all possibilities.

Guy is right about the gender thing - it does make it easier to plan. But of course if you don't want to know ahead of time then don't be pressured into it. I know there are people who like the idea of it being a surprise. Personally I would say that life is going to throw about a million surprises a day at you as a new parent, so really you will not be short on surprise by finding out ahead of the birth, but that's just how I see it.

[venusvenus123]

Well, looks like my girlfriend and have a sea monkey in our midst and have already started loading up on baby goods.

What are some tricks of the trade to help save some money or your mind?


i missed the mind part of the question--obviously too busy parenting to read the sentence properly! was stuck in the house with 2 super-charged 8 year-olds yesterday.

my son turns 8 today, so the baby days are long gone. the people best equipped to give advice (those with teeny-uns and one on the way!) have already done so.

i don't know what more i can add. except that it goes damn fast! i said to my son last night that in another 8 years he'll be able to get married. he found that quite alarming. not as alarming as us!

great advice about going out lots before the baby arrives. my mother in law treated us to a lovely weekend when i was 8 months' pregnant. i found it a little tricky walking in the derbyshire dales when i was the size of a small bus, but it was really great, on reflection.

it's a shame you can't put a lot of sleep in the sleep bank now, because that's the main thing you'll miss. you'll probably be too tired to realise you're missing out on parties and restaurants!

like GI said, be supportive of your lady--b4 and after the birth! i'm sure you are/will be, but that's really what i valued most. someone giving me a break, an extra hour's sleep, some time to myself.

all so exciting ! :D

[Guy Incognito]

Its nice to see people agreeing with me, makes me feel like i am doing something right! Its so easy to doubt yourself but a lot of it is sticking to your guns and keep on doing what you think is right even if it feels wrong sometimes and baby is crying for whatever reason. I hope that makes sense

[hpdrifter]

Congrats. How do you feel about this? I take it it was unplanned?

Lots of good advice in this thread.

[kaiser soze]

yeah it was unplanned but totally cool with us and our family and friends, so
we're getting great support.

Thanks for the advice...we will definitely put it to use ;)

[abbott]

I think we saved money when our first one was born, just because my wife and I stopped going out and drinking so much. The best thing you can do is enjoy and do it your way. Congrats & Best wishes...


My wife went in for a check up today and the doctor said the baby will come in the next 2 days. This is #2 for us.

The first thing I did when I found out about #2 is I booked a trip to NY and spent 5 days in Manhattan. Not the best way to save money. Also, We went out 2 nights ago and had a nice dinner and live jazz. I am trying to get in as much as possible.

once our first reached 9 months, I will say it has only gotten better each day, but the infant stage was tough on me personally. To work so hard and get little response from a 2 month old was more work than I imagined, but now that the first is 4, It does get better everyday, and I would never change it. Also, It would be helpful if you lived by family, as I did not and I had a hard time trusting any babysitter until my girl was old enough to talk with me and let me know what was cracking.