I'm in a BAD predicament

[AceFace]

oh this really sucks.

so i had lunch with a co-worker the other day. on the way back to work, we saw one of our female "candidates" holding hands with a girl on campus. i work for a religious org and "candidates" are people in the process of becoming a Rev. they're in college, or seminary or what have you.

anyhoo i didn't think anything of if except "you go girl, she's cute". then today i get called into my boss' office (not the bishop). apparently my co-worker told her about seeing this hand holding. The candidate has never mentioned she's gay and that would effect whether she becomes a Rev. or not. so now my boss wants me to "testify", in a sense, that i saw it. Basically it's going to ruin this girl's life as she obviously wants to serve god as a pastor if she's into it this early in her life.

i refused to do it.

now i'm getting the cold shoulder and i hope this doesn't effect my job.

what would you do? i mean i feel like i did the right thing. what if she's not gay? what if she's just trying to figure out who she is and right now she's trying girls. what if that was her BFF? i can't jump to the conclusion she's gay just based on her holding hands with a girl.

[Myu-to]

Oh man. That's rough, however, like you said maybe it's her friend, and nothing more. The facts are the facts. You saw what you saw. It's going to be hard, but make as not biased as possible. Two girls were walking and holding hands, nothing more. And if she is gay maybe it would be better that this information come out now, and everyone knows where everyone stands, then later on when the news might suprise her congregation.

Blarf.

Best of luck.

[Loppfessor]

I hold hands with lots of girls and I"m not gay....ok seriously though that is stupid. In what forum exactly do they want you to "testify"? Is she being brought up for a review or board of some sort?

[MC Moot]

Seems more strait forward from an outside perspective perhaps...but I concur with your position,no way would I participate in such a "witch hunt"...morally and ethically I think your on solid ground...sexual orientation should be of little to no consideration given that it doesn't effect job performance...morally there may be a surface conflict but ethically it's a non starter...judge not least you be judged,what a beautiful refrain...:rolleyes:

[Dorothy Wood]

I held hands with my girlfriends sometimes in college. celebrities do it all the time. unless you saw her making out with the chick, I don't think anyone should jump to any conclusions about her sexuality.

[MC Moot]

I held hands with my girlfriends sometimes in college. celebrities do it all the time. unless you saw her making out with the chick, I don't think anyone should jump to any conclusions about her sexuality.

you know,so true...christ I'm Spanish and seeing women court on their evening stroll arm in arm or hand in hand is a really nice thing..and in India and Nepal I saw men doing it all the time as well...had nothing to do with sexuality...I dig it...north americans can be so frigin regressive and simple...(y)

[HEIRESS]

what faith does your church follow?

Cause one of the most well-known lutheran priests who runs a mission in vancouver's east side is super gay. like super duper gay. he refers to himself as a "street priest".

A friend of mine rented one of his many rooms one summer awhile ago.
He owns this quite large house that is right near china town in a crappy area and when you enter the gates its like a shining garden of eden.
and there are like 20 cats running around.
and as I was walking up the huge set of back stairs to his balcony he was standing on the top wearing a pair of itty bitty shorts, bright purple croc shoes, and had a mohawk that was died a strawberry blonde color.
the dude is in his early 50s and he has the body of a superbly in shape 25-30 year old.

I met his boyfriend, who is only like 28!

anyways, they have him on CBC radio lots interviewing him and hearing his stories about all the sad cases you find on east hasting street in vancouver.

super. cool. dude.

anyways, just wondering what faith your church is and if it truly should be such a big deal.

[Freebasser]

This is why religion is stupid.

[camo]

yup

[beastieangel01]

I think you did the right thing, 100%

Shitty that they are giving you the cold shoulder, but at least you'll be able to sleep at night knowing you're not the asshole.

[mikizee]

I think you did the right thing, 100%

Shitty that they are giving you the cold shoulder, but at least you'll be able to sleep at night knowing you're not the asshole.

absolutely

[Myu-to]

Word, I missed the part where you said they have already asked you to "testify" against her. Testify sounds serious. You did the right thing.

No sell outs.

It's a shame when people ruin religion, and miss the part about love and acceptance.

[Lex Diamonds]

Ahh, God Bless America. "Land of the Free".

[adam_f]

Reason #4080 why I hate religion.

[JesusChrist]

And they wonder why I haven't returned yet

[Kid Presentable]

Lopp's avatar is bomb yo. *flicks toothpick*

[Audio.]

I think you should have talked to her about hers and your situation.

[AceFace]

yeah, it's not my church. i work for the bishop in his office that's not in a church (thank goodness).

i think it's the biddies in the office making the big deal and not necessarily the actual pastors, which i hope they aren't swayed by those women. one of them said since i wouldn't say anything, she'll tell them she saw it. now how is THAT more ethical?

also, the main reason they're tattling is b/c "she lied". they said it's ok that she's homosexual (if indeed she really is) but she lied about it.

now i HIGHLY doubt there's anywhere on any application that says "who do you prefer to fuck?"

[Fern]

oh this really sucks.

so i had lunch with a co-worker the other day. on the way back to work, we saw one of our female "candidates" holding hands with a girl on campus. i work for a religious org and "candidates" are people in the process of becoming a Rev. they're in college, or seminary or what have you.

anyhoo i didn't think anything of if except "you go girl, she's cute". then today i get called into my boss' office (not the bishop). apparently my co-worker told her about seeing this hand holding. The candidate has never mentioned she's gay and that would effect whether she becomes a Rev. or not. so now my boss wants me to "testify", in a sense, that i saw it. Basically it's going to ruin this girl's life as she obviously wants to serve god as a pastor if she's into it this early in her life.

i refused to do it.

now i'm getting the cold shoulder and i hope this doesn't effect my job.

what would you do? i mean i feel like i did the right thing. what if she's not gay? what if she's just trying to figure out who she is and right now she's trying girls. what if that was her BFF? i can't jump to the conclusion she's gay just based on her holding hands with a girl.

I would say what I saw. Did you see any knoodling? It's not like she was face down or ankles deep in a vag or anything....

[ericlee]

did anyone mention that religion is stupid? They have?

Oh ok then. Carry on.

[ms.peachy]

Is there anyone 'higher up' the chain of command you believe is reasonable, to whom you can say "look what is happening here is really unreasonable and frankly, un-Christian?" I mean, the woman who says she will say she saw it if you don't - whoa, what is that about?

Also, can you get another job?

[Kid Presentable]

Is there anyone 'higher up' the chain of command you believe is reasonable, to whom you can say "look what is happening here is really unreasonable and frankly, un-Christian?" I mean, the woman who says she will say she saw it if you don't - whoa, what is that about?


LOL if God wouldn't hook up the pony, he's not going to intervene here.

[AceFace]

Is there anyone 'higher up' the chain of command you believe is reasonable, to whom you can say "look what is happening here is really unreasonable and frankly, un-Christian?" I mean, the woman who says she will say she saw it if you don't - whoa, what is that about?

Also, can you get another job?

i took this advice. (y) i went to the higher up and told him what i saw and that it, to me, didn't seem like anything. he really appreciated me telling him that because he really didn't want to start an "investigation" over something so small and trivial. i'm glad he's a good guy and also decided to do the right thing.

my job is great, other than some of the secretaries that work here trying to impose what they think are morals. i get paid well and it's usually a great job. if we have to move, i'm gonna hate trying to find a new job i like. :/

[BangkokB]

There is alot of truth to what you say there. Here in BKK my wife way back yesteryear would walk hand in hand with a friend of hers and believe you me I couldn't shake nothing out of that.:( I tried to instigate but I was Scorned.

[Lex Diamonds]

I hear ya buddy, sometimes those fish just won't bite, no matter how big the worm. Believe me, I'm packing some Jabba the Hutt shit.

[Audio.]

to those that think religion is stupid; come on, religion isnt all that bad. Depends on how certain people utilize it. No need to be douchy about it.

[mikizee]

Religion is terrible and will be responsible for the downfall of this planet