i had the most embarassing job interview ever today

[Bob]

you know how generally, when they interview you, it means that they've looked at your resume, decided you're qualified, and they just want to get to know you? well I went in for an interview for an internship at the DA's office's child abuse unit today, expecting that to be the case, my confidence soaring due to the fact that I was the only applicant for the slot, but no, that wasn't the case at all!

what actually happened was that she had read my resume and decided that i was not qualified, but that she'd call me in for an interview anyway and give me a chance to sell myself in person, and oh lordy was I ever not prepared to do that. it was like:

"hi, welcome, come in, sit down, so I noticed from you resume that you don't have any experience working with victims or anything like that. did I miss something, or...?"

"uh, no, no that's true."

"oh ok, because we do a lot of that here, and we handle a lot of disturbing cases, so there's a lot of talk about anuses and stuff like that, do you think you can handle that?"

"yes."

"really?"

"yes?"

"really?"

"....yes?"

"hmm...right, well, thanks for coming in, i have some other people to interview [note the part where I said I was the only applicant] but i'll let you know when i make a decision."

it was a whirlwind of shame and i dunno maybe she's right, maybe i'm not qualified (i had hoped to learn something) but damn, she could have saved us both some trouble and just not interviewed me, that was unpleasant.

[b i o n i c]

i guess she didnt believe you could really handle the anuses

[jennyb]

unpleasant is right! but it sure makes for a great story lol... so wait, there are lawyers that specialize in sodomy?

[Bob]

unpleasant is right! but it sure makes for a great story lol... so wait, there are lawyers that specialize in sodomy?

child sodomy, yes

[Lex Diamonds]

The point of these things is to get an idea of who you are. She obviously wanted a more in-depth reply than just "yes", and even tried to help you out by repeating the question. It aint their fault you missed the cue.

[-T-]

"yes"

If it was only that easy. lol

[monkey]

well that was really unprofessional of your interviewer. sucks.

[Bob]

The point of these things is to get an idea of who you are. She obviously wanted a more in-depth reply than just "yes", and even tried to help you out by repeating the question. It aint their fault you missed the cue.

well that wasn't exactly a transcript of the interview, it was a dramatization, i had more complex answers than that, but it was sort of the gist of how it went

i know how job interviews work, i know that they're generally about getting an idea of your personality, this one was different is what i'm saying

[Lex Diamonds]

OK. The way you described it in your first post just makes it look like you had no idea what was going on.

[Helvete]

You were seriously talking about anuses on your job interview? WTF

[ToucanSpam]

I predict you will get the job.

[Belt Parkway]

If you're still interested in the position, read everything you can on anuses. Immerse yourself in anuses.

[Freebasser]

To be honest, I thought Bob was really into his anuses.

[Kid Presentable]

That smell is a fucker to get off your hand though.

[Lyman Zerga]

doesnt he want to become a lawyer? that might explain the anus comment

[yeahwho]

At that point I would of lied and said, Yes I was a corporate copyright lawyer for Wyeth Consumer Healthcare's Preparation H division. Then tell her you actually came up with the verbiage, Lubricate applicator well, then gently insert applicator into the rectum, then of course add the obligatory, "What time do I start'?

[Bob]

You were seriously talking about anuses on your job interview? WTF

well again, it's the child abuse unit, anuses is their business

I predict you will get the job.

based on the fact that she said she had to interview more people when i was the only applicant for the job, no, no i don't think i will. i don't think i want it anyway though, i don't think i like child anuses much after all

[rirv]

Maybe it was a special law student edition of "To Catch a Predator".

[checkyourprez]

like i was saying man, you need to say the opposite.

shes asks if you have knowledge of anuses you say your damn right I am an expert on child anuses. she would have been very impressed. virtually impossible to not get the job in that case.

[AceFace]

i don't get it... if you're applying to be an intern, i'd think that would tell them right there that you have no experience. i thought being an intern was part of learning and getting experience.

[Bob]

yeah i didn't get the job

it's alright, i don't think i wanted it anyway

[ToucanSpam]

Maybe I jinxed it. Oh well, I guess you don't be dealing with anuses any time soon. Did they give you any feedback other than 'you were unsuccessful, blah blah blah'?

[adam_f]

I was going to make a joke saying that it was only embarrassing because you showed up...and it turned out it was embarrassing because you showed up.

Damn.

[Waus]

At least now you don't have to have your opinion of mankind ruined everyday by reading about child predators/abusers. It sounds like an unpleasant line of work to me.