Having kids

[Adam]

So, for some reason recently (like past 3 months or so) I've been thinking about kids and if I do or do not want them - no clue what brought this on, maybe cus I'm nearly 30... Ever since I was about 19 I've always been of the opinion that I do want kids and several of them. I come from a large catholic irish family so its almost hard-wired into me to want 'em.

But now, I'm fairly sure I don't (barring accidents etc) and making that choice seems kinda liberating. However, I do want my sisters to have kids - I want to be an uncle more than a Dad. Is that weird? Gonna make a poll out of this some how.

Do you want kids? Do you think 6 billion people is enough for this planet?

edit: Ok, so didn't make a poll cus I ticked the wrong box and I can't edit to add a poll... oops and grrrr, but the choices I put into my text editor was:

Want kids, always have
Want kids now, but never wanted until recently
Have kids, don't want anymore
Have kids, want more
Have kids I no longer want
Don't want kids, never have
Don't want kids, but used to
Undecided but leaning more towards want kids
Undecided but leaning more towards no kids
I touched echewta as a kid

sorry for messing up what was already a poor thread

[Adam]

According to the International Programs Center, U.S. Census Bureau, the total population of the World, projected to 06/14/09 at 06:05 GMT (EST+5) is 6,786,431,506

That is kinda neat when you're bored

[Audio.]

maybe having a few nieces and nephews will influence to have children of your own?

[gbsuey]

i should just see what occurs-i ALWAYS said i'd NEVER have kids....i got two now and turned out i'm loving being a mum!! Am absolutely never having any more tho-and i'm sticking to that. I don't think the world needs more people and i sure as shit don't need any more-i like to spend as much time as possible with them both.

I was majorly shocked when i read the population 50 years ago was around 2 billion-a rise of 4 billion in 50 years in just insane-there can be no way of sustaining that many people without royally fucking this planet, i guess we're doing it though(fucking the planet i mean).

[Kid Presentable]

It's increasing about 1 billion or so every 13 years.

[funk63]

I want a kid just so I can have a little bro to hang out with. I don't want to deal with the whole baby thing though so I'll probably pay someone to take care of them until they are about three.

[gbsuey]

babies really are hard work but i reckon you gotta go through that bit to appreciate all the other bits. like not having to deal with nappies anymore, or them actually telling you what's wrong

i reckon i'm lucky to have boys though-i got to take them to Monster Jam last week, and i don't have to deal with Bratz(look more like Whores to me) or that shit. And yes i'm aware girls are into very cool stuff too,i just like things the way they are!

[roosta]

right now, i have no desire/want to have kids.

[Guy Incognito]

its hard work but all worth it and then some but i dont want anymore. i have two and its exhausting, expensive but hilarious and wonderful but when the number of kids is more than the number of adults its not a good thing imo

[ms.peachy]

If someone really thinks they don't want kids, I would never presume to tell them they ought to, or that they will regret it if they don't, or that sort of thing. Being a parent is a big fucking deal. It changes everything. Now, this is not a bad thing - if you want kids. If you don't, then it's probably not so great.

All I would say is, be open to the possibility that you might change your mind. I have posted here before in similar discussions, about my friends who firmly believed they did not want kids, and lived a very nice lifestyle full of exotic holidays, enviable clothing and breakable decorative objects. Their daughter is now 17 months old, and they are utterly besotted with her, and can't imagine how they ever imagined they did not want a life that included pureeing carrots and wiping drool off the leather sofa.

[HAL 9000]

My son is 7 months old – it is pretty hard work although I think as babies go he is quite a manageable one (ie he mostly sleeps through the night, smiles a lot and cries fairly rarely).

It is expensive too and can be tough watching single friends or childless couples move into bigger houses and buy nice things whereas my current (and foreseeable future) income is being allocated towards the welfare of someone else.

But I would not change it and would have more, my son is totally awesome. Kids become the most important thing in the world, and I feel strangely proud when someone at work points out that I have vomit on the shoulder of my jacket. As Ms. Peachy says, it changes everything – and its not just in practical ways (ie never sleeping and having no money), it changes the way you think about things. I have become quite different, every decision is framed in terms of ‘what does this mean for Hal Version 2.0? I like it.

[b i o n i c]

you should just pop a few babies out with yer new girl and figure it out later. being a parent cant possibly be that hard, all my friends are doing it

[hpdrifter]

I want kids really bad but it may just not happen for me. I've made my choices and it's time for me to grow up and live with them.

[Guy Incognito]

I want kids really bad but it may just not happen for me. I've made my choices and it's time for me to grow up and live with them.

i dont mean to pry but what do you mean? made your choices. i thought you were just married and that generally means kids soon. feel free to tell me to mind me own

[trailerprincess]

My sister got married last summer is currently trying to get preggers and I feel for her as she's having some much trouble - gettting things lasered and loads of meds but we both can't wait until it happens. I am starting to be more comfortable around kids. Not sure I want any myself but if she couldn't conceive, I think I would do the surrogacy thing for her.

[nodanaonlyzuul]

Don't want kids, but used to

When I was younger I always said I did, mainly because that's what I thought I was supposed to do.

Children are great, but I have too many things of my own to work out due to my parents having a child (me) when they were not ready. I don't want to bring another life in the world in a similar fashion since I did not have a good example of parenting in my life.

And I especially don't want to have a child for any of the reasons that have been proposed to me: "Don't you want to have your future husband's name carried on?" "Don't you want to see what they end up looking like and what kind of personality they have?" "Don't you want to have more meaning in your life?"

I'm sure children do help in all those areas but I feel that if I were to have a child just to fulfill those reasons, not because I actually desire a child, it would be terribly selfish and not a good reason to have one.

And the way my life has gone I still have a lot to do and accomplish, and I doubt I'll be finished in time to still be in my peak "baby making" years. Maybe one day I'll change my mind, and if I cannot physically have one, I can adopt.

But I don't see myself ever being emotionally capable of having a child so I'm not putting pressure on myself for it.

I'd be happy just to be the cool Auntie.

[paul jones]

I sympathize with people who don't want kids and also the one's who have kids.


I would have had kids had I kept in certain relationships but I didn't but am more happy I have none.

I'm not or never will diss the people who have kids but I know that in my situation it would not be good for me or any offspring to survive normally.

Today's society is well and truly fucked and I would not want to bring any child up in this world what with terroriorsm,globalisation,internet or 'fucking shit music'.

Apocalypse NOW!(y)

[hpdrifter]

i dont mean to pry but what do you mean? made your choices. i thought you were just married and that generally means kids soon. feel free to tell me to mind me own

I chose not to face some things that needed facing. I don't have a ton of time to figure it out so it just might not happen. Vague, I know.

[Guy Incognito]

I chose not to face some things that needed facing. I don't have a ton of time to figure it out so it just might not happen. Vague, I know.

err yes very vague but thats cool - you have your reasons and its none of my business. As long as you are comfortable and happy with the choices you make then thats all that matters(y)

[ET]

I can't see kids in the near future. People tell me I'm good with children... that I'd be a good father. Others can't see me ever having kids. I'd be too worried about them having the best life possible, the way I see it. I'm that way with my godchild and I don't even get to see her everyday. I wonder what it's like for her in school, if she's happy, what she wants to be when she grows up, what the world is going to be like then... etc. etc. Then I imagine how I'd be if I had a child of my own.

[hpdrifter]

err yes very vague but thats cool - you have your reasons and its none of my business. As long as you are comfortable and happy with the choices you make then thats all that matters(y)

Sorry. :o I'm trying not to say too much, I feel like I already have in other threads which I hope fall off the edge of the board sooner rather than later.

Not exactly comfortable and happy about it but it's what I have to work with right now. I'm trying to have hope, I guess we'll see.

[Guy Incognito]

Sorry. :o I'm trying not to say too much, I feel like I already have in other threads which I hope fall off the edge of the board sooner rather than later.

Not exactly comfortable and happy about it but it's what I have to work with right now. I'm trying to have hope, I guess we'll see.

ok well i dont know what other threads you refer to but i think i can guess what you mean. my advice to you and yours is never say never. i think you should bide your time and maybe things might change.

[RobMoney$]

Just got back from my sons' middle school graduation and saw this thread.
I'd just like to add something for the "pro-kids" side of the discussion.

One of the greatest emotions I've ever expierenced in life is a fathers' pride. Getting he opportunity to watch your child achieve is something words cannot express.
I'm very grateful that I've had the opportunity to have that expierence in life.

[Bob]

Just got back from my sons' middle school graduation and saw this thread.
I'd just like to add something for the "pro-kids" side of the discussion.

One of the greatest emotions I've ever expierenced in life is a fathers' pride. Getting he opportunity to watch your child achieve is something words cannot express.
I'm very grateful that I've had the opportunity to experience that in my life.

for my law school graduation, some of the students' parents were alumni from the school as well, so instead of getting hooded (http://www.nyu.edu/gsas/convocation/2008/images/Act_of_Hooding.jpg) by a professor like everyone else, they went up on stage and got hooded by the parent. my mom said that her heart was pounding out of her chest when i went up for the normal hooding, so i can't imagine what it must have felt like for the parents who got to do it themselves

[checkyourprez]

So, for some reason recently (like past 3 months or so) I've been thinking about kids and if I do or do not want them - no clue what brought this on, maybe cus I'm nearly 30... Ever since I was about 19 I've always been of the opinion that I do want kids and several of them. I come from a large catholic irish family so its almost hard-wired into me to want 'em.

But now, I'm fairly sure I don't (barring accidents etc) and making that choice seems kinda liberating. However, I do want my sisters to have kids - I want to be an uncle more than a Dad. Is that weird? Gonna make a poll out of this some how.

Do you want kids? Do you think 6 billion people is enough for this planet?

edit: Ok, so didn't make a poll cus I ticked the wrong box and I can't edit to add a poll... oops and grrrr, but the choices I put into my text editor was:

Want kids, always have
Want kids now, but never wanted until recently
Have kids, don't want anymore
Have kids, want more
Have kids I no longer want
Don't want kids, never have
Don't want kids, but used to
Undecided but leaning more towards want kids
Undecided but leaning more towards no kids
I touched echewta as a kid

sorry for messing up what was already a poor thread


nah dog, its understandable.

its easier to molest your nephews than your sons.

[RobMoney$]

my mom said that her heart was pounding out of her chest when i went up for the normal hooding, so i can't imagine what it must have felt like for the parents who got to do it themselves


My son is a special needs child, he's autistic.
At the graduation, they called up the top 30 students in order of GPA.
My heart almost exploded when they called my sons' name at #17 (class size of about 250) and was then followed by a standing ovation from his fellow students and teachers.
I'm glad I was wearing sunglasses.

One of the greatest moments of my life.

[Kid Presentable]

My son is a special needs child, he's autistic.
At the graduation, they called up the top 30 students in order of GPA.
My heart almost exploded when they called my sons' name at #17 (class size of about 250) and was then followed by a standing ovation from his fellow students and teachers.
I'm glad I was wearing sunglasses.

One of the greatest moments of my life.

Nice, Robert.