you ever have one of those days?

[Bob]

where you wake up and you say "i really need to buy some bananas today" but you have a lot of work to do and you put it off, but all day you're thinking about buying bananas, and finally you get to a good breaking point where you can get to the banana store, and you get there, but all of the bananas, they all suck. maybe you got there at the end of the banana cycle, i don't know, but they're all browning and mushy already.

but you came all this way to buy bananas and you know that if you put it off, you probably aren't going to be back anytime soon and, well, you need bananas, you're out. so you pick out a bunch that looks palatable; it's got a brown spot here and there, and it's kind of mushy, but it's still kind of green up at the stem and well the label does say "superfood" so how bad could it be, right?

so you take them home, and you put them in the fridge, because there's 6 of them and there's no way you're getting through all 6 before they go bad without some refrigeration, and you leave them there, and then later that day you eat one and you say "this isn't so bad" but in about 15 minutes your stomach starts to hurt. not bad, but in the kind of way that it hurts ever so slightly after you eat a banana that you should have eaten one or two days ago? so you can only imagine what the rest of the bunch is going to be like, and i guess you could throw them away, i mean they only cost $1.50, but you really do need bananas, and you aren't getting back to the banana store any time soon, you know that.

that's been my day today. i thought for sure that if one thing on my list would go right today it would be "buy bananas" but apparently that was a bit optimistic

[Kid Presentable]

It's a great metaphor.

[rirv]

Two things:

There are banana stores wtf?

Why are you putting bananas in the fridge? Did no one teach you about banana storage? Leave them out on the side. Never put them in a cupboard or everything will smell like bananas and never put them in the fridge because it ruins them.(n)

[Kid Presentable]

Yet another great metaphor *print screen*

[Bob]

Two things:

There are banana stores wtf?

Why are you putting bananas in the fridge? Did no one teach you about banana storage? Leave them out on the side. Never put them in a cupboard or everything will smell like bananas and never put them in the fridge because it ruins them.(n)

does it? i just assumed that refrigerators preserved everything. guess i'm going back to the banana store.

[rirv]

It's not quite as clear cut as I thought, but here are a few thoughts on bananas in the fridge:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/notesandqueries/query/0,5753,-1461,00.html

[Bob]

It's not quite as clear cut as I thought, but here are a few thoughts on bananas in the fridge:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/notesandqueries/query/0,5753,-1461,00.html

ah! see? once they get yellow you can keep them in the fridge which is exactly what i did, ipso facto something went right today. well yesterday, technically. but still, how dare you try to take the wind from my sails like that

i think i'm living with a sex offender

[rirv]

Yeah, don't put let your housemate put bananas in your arse.

[Bob]

nah, not that kind of sex offender, the kind that's like "yeah i may be a creepy 40 year old but 20-something women will totally want to have sex with me if they move in with me and there will be noooo consequences whatsoever when we do"

so he's probably not a sex offender yet but well i don't like where this is going

[Videodrome]

would you rather the 40 year old be banging 60-something women?

[Bob]

i don't care who he bangs, as long as they aren't roommates

[Videodrome]

that's what i'm talking about! you better stand your ground early on this shit.

[skra75]

this thread is bananas!

[jabumbo]

i cry a little inside every time i stick my lunchbox in the fridge at work and forget to take out the banana first

i personally think cold, refrigerated bananas suck

[hpdrifter]

this thread is bananas!

B-A-N-A-N-A-S!

[Bob]

i cry a little inside every time i stick my lunchbox in the fridge at work and forget to take out the banana first

i personally think cold, refrigerated bananas suck

they do suck, but they're better than mushy brown ones

they're also better than creepy 40 year old roommates who are looking for bangmaids

[funk63]

Its just one a those days when you dont wanna wake up
Everything is fucked, everybody sucks
You dont really know why, but you wanna justify
Rrippin someones head off
No human contact, and if you interact your life is on contract
Your best bet is to stay away mother fucker
Its just wanna those days


Its all about the he said she said bull shit
I think you better quit, lettin shit slip
Or youll be leavin with a fat lip
Its all about the he said she said bull shit
I think you better quit, talkin that shit

Its just one a those days
Feelin like a fraight train
First one to complain, leaves with a blood stain
Damn right, Im a maniac
You better watch your back
Cuz im fuckin up your program
And if you feel stuck up, you just mucked up
Next in line to get ffucked up,
Your best bet is to stay away mother fucker
Its just one of those days


So come and get it

I feel like shit
My suggestion is to keep your distance
Cuz right now Im dangerous
We've all felt like shit,been treated like shit
All those mother fuckers
That wanna step up

I hope you know im like a chain saw
I'll skin your ass raw
Aand if my day keeps goin this way I just might
Break something tonight
Im like a chainsaw
I'll skin your ass raw
And if my day keeps goin this way I just might
Break your fuckin face tonight

Gimmie somethin to break

How bout your fuckin face

I hope you know Im like a chainsaw what
A chainsaw what
A mother fuckin chainsaw what

So come and get it

[jabumbo]

they do suck, but they're better than mushy brown ones

they're also better than creepy 40 year old roommates who are looking for bangmaids


i'd rather have either or both of your options than mine.



just sayin'

[mickill]

You'd think you'd have a very difficult time getting approved for something as limited as a "banana store". But apparently not in Bob's world.

[Bob]

technically the store sells other produce too but i only use it for bananas. i don't trust the rest of it, it's kind of a skeezy store, but with bananas, you know exactly where you stand

skeezy, not unlike my creepy 40 year old roommate who drunkenly confided to me that he would "prefer female roommates because i'm a horny old bastard"

come the fuck on

[b i o n i c]

the banana store in my hood is between the money building and the shoelace warehouse, below the apple store

[mickill]

It's awesome when straight dudes tell other straight dudes that they're horny.

[jabumbo]

i want to say we have 3 places that call themselves banana companies, and they are all located on the same block

[TAL]

Go ahead and say that then, don't be shy.