The death of a parent

[kaiser soze]

I really don't even know how to start, but it is inevitable that my dad of 67 years will be passing away in the coming days. Severe dementia/Alzheimer's which took a turn for the worse the past few months. It's so surreal watching your parent waste away and it's a horrible feeling just waiting for the phone call.

In a way I accept this, I'd rather he pass than suffer much longer but I'm angry that I am of no help to him, it sucks really bad. My poor mom.

This limbo sucks

[MC Moot]

vaya con dios...lo siento...it's one of lifes deepest kicks...peace be onto you and your family in the moment and after...release and transition are at hand...sincerely...

"In my end is my begining"

[monkey]

aww dude, i'm sorry this is going on. it sucks that it happened to your father at a relatively young age. i hope the best for your mother, and hope that you can find strength in each other. i can't imagine the strength you must already have for having gone through most of the battle already.

:(

[hpdrifter]

Wow, I'm really sorry you're going through this. I've seen three of my closest friends go through this in the last two years so you'd think I'd know what to say by now but I still don't. I wish you strength in getting through it and I hope that you have good people around you to offer support.

[YoungRemy]

this must be really tough for you and your mom. sorry you are dealing with this at this phase in your life...

[Fern]

Still can't heear it without choking a bit. Including when I saw them last night.....

I used to talk to cab drivers
well now I just don't bother
I'd empty out my pockets
if someone asked me for a quarter.
there was a time that I'd give the time
to the old, the weak, and the weird.
I just don't know why this is so
but I've never been so scared
am I getting older?
are things getting harder?
I used to never cry
when I would think about my father.
the years went past so goddamn fast.
you know, I've left a lot behind
my devil could care attitute,
you know, I just can't seem to find.
and once upon a time
I never minded very much
I never let it knock me down
or grind me out of touch
am I getting older?
are things getting harder?
I used to never cry
when I would think about my father.
once I had an outlook
different than it is
full of dreams and schemes
it seems they just do not exist
and once I told myself
he will not be missed
now now now I never thought that I would see the day
I'd ever feel like this
am I getting older?
are things getting harder?
I used to never cry
when I would think about my father.
am I getting older?
are things getting harder?
I used to never cry
when I would think about my father.
I used to never cry
I used to never cry
I used to never cry
when I would think about my father.

-D. Barrett, J. Gittleman

[saz]

I really don't even know how to start, but it is inevitable that my dad of 67 years will be passing away in the coming days. Severe dementia/Alzheimer's which took a turn for the worse the past few months. It's so surreal watching your parent waste away and it's a horrible feeling just waiting for the phone call.

In a way I accept this, I'd rather he pass than suffer much longer but I'm angry that I am of no help to him, it sucks really bad. My poor mom.

This limbo sucks

i went through the same thing three to four years back. it was horrible seeing a family member completely lose their mind to alzheimers and dementia. trust me, it's better once they're gone as they are completely free from the disease.

[kaiser soze]

Thanks for all your thoughts, definitely a weird feeling waiting for this. He has lost so much weight. This man used to fix EVERYTHING, was always outdoors, could pick me up with one arm, and loved talking about the civil war.

It is way too soon. And here I thought I was prepared for this considering it has been coming on slow.

[Audio.]

I hate to hear this and I really dont know anything to say other than be brave and never stop supporting. Be strong, man.

[Michelle*s_Farm]

I am so sorry to hear this. My Dad died at 55 in June 2003, then June 2006 his Father died, and then this June his Mom died. It has been very tough as it seems I cannot transcend the feelings of loss and whenever I feel I am close to recovery I experience another loss of a family member. If you want to talk about what you are going through I could listen and if asked offer advice. Although to be honest I have not handled my losses well at all.

[Kid Presentable]

Sorry Kaiser. Your dad contributes a lot to the kind of man you are, which makes losing him especially profound.

I watched my dad rot away in full time care (major stroke completely crippled him). I tried to have one of those deep "You can go" moments at his deathbed, and he farted. Pretty much our relationship in a nutshell. I wish I was joking. I took his death exceptionally hard. I was 18.

I remember in 1991 I was hanging out with him on a Saturday night, and 3 men and a comic book (the Simpsons episode) was on, and at that point pretty new. We watched it and then walked to the Fish and Chip shop. Really mediocre memory, and probably one of my single favourite memories of all time.

Good luck with the pain. You have lots of people around you. You're a dad!

No fun in any case. Thoughts are with you.

[yellow]

[QUOTE=kaiser soze;1690443]I really don't even know how to start, but it is inevitable that my dad of 67 years will be passing away in the coming days. Severe dementia/Alzheimer's which took a turn for the worse the past few months. It's so surreal watching your parent waste away and it's a horrible feeling just waiting for the phone call.

god bless u right now!!!! it fucking sucks what u r going thru. my dad died back in 05' :( ; so i know what u r feeling - again god bless u! <3

[Adam]

Dude, so sorry - no1 can say much that will make you feel better.

I remember my dad dying and I knew when I left the house one night I'd get a phone call in a few hours saying he'd past away - and I did.

It does get easier even though it won't seem like it at first. I'm not prying but when my Dad was dying he always refused to believe he was passing away which made it harder, when my mum died the year after, she accepted it from the beginning and that made it so much nicer and I think she might of passed away sooner because she didn't refuse it...

Ugh, I was gonna talk about the moments of death then - I won't but because you might not wanna hear it although it could help to prepare. If you want to PM me or anything then feel free to do so and I'll expand.

One thing I will say, is be selfish - I really hate any1 outside my family now because at times we (as in me & my sisters and brother) was made to feel not part of the family and was almost refused some closure - you're closer than yours Dads brothers and sisters and any other family they may have so take time to give your dad a hug or even a handshake. Depending on how your family is, say you love him or make your feelings known how you feel about him.

I feel so bad for you, sorry to go on but talking about it - especially here for me made losing my parents so much easier - and I'd do some things different if I had to go through it again. Not being heartless now but I am happy I don't have to suffer that again.

Much respect to you and your family

[kaiser soze]

After a week of pain he is now gone. What a weird feeling. I am thankful he is no longer suffering but so sad that I will never have the chance to see him healthy and happy again.

peace dad

[MC Moot]

my sincere condolences...the phrase "He's in a better place now" may common and considered trite at this moment but it's true...namaste...be well...you'll meet again,don't know how,don't know when...but I know you'll meet again some sunny day...

[hpdrifter]

My condolences, buddy.

[mickill]

Sorry to hear that, man.

[Kid Presentable]

Condolences, dude.

[YoungRemy]

Rest In Peace, Father Soze.

[Michelle*s_Farm]

After a week of pain he is now gone. What a weird feeling. I am thankful he is no longer suffering but so sad that I will never have the chance to see him healthy and happy again.

peace dad

My sincere condolences. Feel free to PM me if you need someone to chat to about losing your Dad. My father died in 2003. Hope you have some close family and friends to help you during this difficult time.