Halp. Advice, plz.

[DandyFop]

So, hi. I need halp.

I met this guy a while back, maybe in January or something? Anyway, he lived in Salt Lake at the time and I was in LA. I met him when I was back in town for a visit, and we hit it off pretty quick, some kind of connection for sure. The next day he requested me on facebook and ever since then we'll talk online once a week or so, kinda got to know each other, and I would hang out with him when I went back to SLC (on his request. I've done pretty well at playing it cool).

So now he's moved out here to go to USC, and he lives like 10 minutes away. This whole time I've been hoping that he'd come out here and we'd get together. I figured he would just come out and we'd hang out and see what happens. So we've hung out a few times and I still am not sure how to read him. I know we get along really well and blah blah blah but I don't know if he is attracted to me and all that. We've never really been around each other drunk or had a chance for anything to happen.

My plan was just to hang out and see how it unravelled...however, the exact same weekend he was moving here, I went on a date with a guy, and we've gone out more and it's becoming apparent that it might turn into something serious. The problem is, I'm still hung up on SLC guy and I don't think there's any way I can give it my all in another relationship if I am still wondering about SLC dude.

So I'm thinking about laying it all out there on the line and seeing what happens. Nothing crazy or too dramatic but something like this - "Since we met, I've had a thing for you. I figured I would just see how it went when you came out, but I realized that I'm just going to be wondering all the time, and for my own sanity I need to know if you like me as more than a friend. Which, if you do, is fine, but I just need to know".

What do you guys think? I'm really scared but at the same time I think it's something i have to do...I really can't deal with this anxiety anymore.

[Freebasser]

Yes! Don't be a Dorothy Wood and 'play it cool' - just go out there and grab him by his metaphorical tie (or real one - is he a snappy dresser?) and pull him over onto your metaphorical desk and tongue his face off.

[DandyFop]

Honestly, that's what I REALLY want to do, and have considered, but I'm way too scared he'll be like WTF ARE YOU DOING

[na§tee]

yeah! you know you have to do it - you've answered your own question. you know we're all going to say yes, go for it, so just do it! just see them both for a little while if need be and see what happens. GO GO GO!

[Freebasser]

Honestly, that's what I REALLY want to do, and have considered, but I'm way too scared he'll be like WTF ARE YOU DOING

You can either do it and he either says 'yes' (in which case, hooray!) or 'no' (in which case, never mind - it was never going to happen anyway) or you can leave it and become a crazy old cat lady with a vagina that becomes so unused that it sounds like bacon crackling on an open fire when it finally opens.

I have walked up to people in the past and gone 'Hi, I've seen you around and I think you're cute. Fancy going out for a drink?' True, they've pretty much always said no, but that's because not many women like short beardy men propositiong them in the street/bar/discothèque. That's life! Um...

[Bob]

You can either do it and he either says 'yes' (in which case, hooray!) or 'no' (in which case, never mind - it was never going to happen anyway) or you can leave it and become a crazy old cat lady with a vagina that becomes so unused that it sounds like bacon crackling on an open fire when it finally opens.


great! now i've lost my appetite for bacon and vaginas. thanks!

wait. was "appetite" the right word?

[na§tee]

freeb, that was really gross :(

[Freebasser]

I'm going to make a bacon sandwich now.

[saz]

Honestly, that's what I REALLY want to do, and have considered, but I'm way too scared he'll be like WTF ARE YOU DOING

yeah, you should let the slc dude know that you're interested. even if he's not interested, he'll still very likely be flattered, as most guys usually are, and, they won't make the first move and will just play it cool and want to be a gentleman or nice guy, as they don't want to potentially creep the girl out.

[camo]

become a crazy old cat lady with a vagina that becomes so unused that it sounds like bacon crackling on an open fire when it finally opens.


...uuummm who would be the one/kind/sort to open that up?

[Echewta]

Well, you have to think about new guy too. If he is digging you and thinks that it might go somewhere, make sure you are honest with him that you aren't looking for something serious right now without getting into all of the details about you wanting to see if SLC boy wants to have a bacon sandwich. Last thing you want to do is drive new boy away and find out SLC boy doesn't want anything more than friends.

[DipDipDive]

I feel like if you can't tell if SLC dude is into you, he's probably not. Dudes aren't that complicated. I do think you should ask him straight up though because I could be wrong. But in my experience, if a guy is into you, you'll know it.

Go for the other guy. He's made it clear he likes you and you deserve to be liked, not to have to play guessing games.

[Dorothy Wood]

I would say, give SLC guy a rest for a bit, because he just moved to L.A. and he probably wants to be single and figure out who he is and all that bullshit.

I mean, you can still say, "hai, I like you", just so he knows, but I wouldn't assume that even if he liked you he'd want a relationship type deal right now.

howeverrrr, I don't know, cort's boy of 3+ years just moved to town when they started going out. she was taking photos of our friends' band and he was all *dream weaver*, but then she had to be the one who made the situation happen. we purposely decided that she should go alone to a show he'd be at, so they could chat. and they did and ended up talking all night, but not making out. when she left in the morning, she left her phone number on a piece of paper next to where he was sleeping. thennn, he called her, and the rest is history! they are in love so hard it's disgusting.

I mean, it should just be easy peasy like that. I know I gripe a lot on here about boys, but really it should be easy. if the dude right now isn't floating your boat, maybe he's just not the one for you. but don't make the mistake of pushing him away for something that just seems better. make sure you like the SLC for real, before you place all your hopes on him.


I am super baked right now.

[paul jones]

take him to an ice rink after it's closed like in Rocky

[DandyFop]

We just played drinking games for the last 6 hours.

And then i let the cat out of the bag.

And yeah, he doesn't like me.

It sucks, but I'm glad I know.

[checkyourprez]

take him to an ice rink after it's closed like in Rocky

or happy gilmore.


and challenge him to make a puck into the net, and if he misses he has to give you a kiss.

if he makes it...talk about your all time biggest backfires.

[paul jones]

We just played drinking games for the last 6 hours.

And then i let the cat out of the bag.

And yeah, he doesn't like me.

It sucks, but I'm glad I know.


I just pictured you letting an actual cat out of an actual bag for a second before realising it's just a phrase.I wonder who thought that up and what letting a cat out of a bag has got to do with telling someone a secret?
Maybe one day in the middle ages or something some medievil wigger found a cat and put it in a bag because his medievil soccer mom didn't allow pets in their medievil apartment and one day whilst the medievil wigger kid was playing hooky from medievil high school, just hanging around outside the medievil 7 eleven that his medievil soccer mom was cleaning his medievil room she saw the bag and wondered what the meeowing noise was coming from it and asked her medievil wigger son what it was when she layed her medievil dinner table that night for some medievil pizza that the medievil wigger son admitted that indeed that was a cat inside the bag and could he take a piece of medievil mexican pizza to feed it.


anyway babs.There's plenty more fish in the sea(y)

[hpdrifter]

Did you take freebs advice and say "Fancy..." when you asked him?

Cuz that might have done it.

Suuriously, though, sorry to hear it but at least you know and now you can go forward with things with the other guy and see where that goes.

[Freebasser]

I am a man of few words.

Sexy words.

Way to go Barb! Sort of!

[DandyFop]

Morning after, I feel just a bit silly but not too bad. When I said was pretty succinct and not crazy, and the whole thing was casual and easy. Actually I think I knew a bit earlier, when in the drinking game, we were playing Never Have I Ever, and he said "Never have I ever had sex with a perfect 10". Pretty sure that was the moment that I was like "alrighty, yeah not gonna happen."

[hpdrifter]

Because that's totally a douchey thing to say?

[DandyFop]

Yeah I think my romanticized ideal of him died at that moment.

[TAL]

Haha, I read it as this first.

Never have I ever had sex with a perfect 10".

[Dorothy Wood]

Because that's totally a douchey thing to say?

yeah, no joke, that's awful.

[DandyFop]

Yeah. And then I was laughing to my other friend about it when I realized she'd had sex with him, years ago, and I was like "oh, shit...sorry". But she just laughed it off and we joked about him wishing megan fox was there to give him a bj.

[Nuzzolese]

I'm glad he was honest with you. A worse thing for him to have done was to have kept you hanging around just in case. Now, in a way, he has power over you and he knows it. If he's a really big jerk, he might come around sometimes to wield it over you and make you think he's changed his mind about you, when in fact he's just lonely. I say beware of him, and make it clear you've moved on quickly, to prevent this.

[DandyFop]

Yeah, no, he's not going to do that. It was very straight-forward and I am not worried about that kind of backlash.

Also the guy I'm dating is super amazing and really into me, which doesn't hurt.

[Echewta]

and really into me, which doesn't hurt.
*giggle*

[Dorothy Wood]

I'm glad he was honest with you. A worse thing for him to have done was to have kept you hanging around just in case. Now, in a way, he has power over you and he knows it. If he's a really big jerk, he might come around sometimes to wield it over you and make you think he's changed his mind about you, when in fact he's just lonely. I say beware of him, and make it clear you've moved on quickly, to prevent this.

I think this is happening to me a little, except not so extreme. that dude that declined my make out offer keeps calling me and asking me to do stuff on friday nights. and I think it's because he knows I like him and he doesn't have anything better to do. I conceded last friday, but knew it was a fake date, so instead of dressing cute and sexy, I dressed wacky...which was pretty liberating I must say.

I'd avoid him if I could, but we are co-leaders of a cult, so I have to see his bitch ass all the time.


dandy, I'm glad you have a nice boy to offset the SLC douche. (y)

[Knuckles]

But she just laughed it off and we joked about him wishing megan fox was there to give him a bj.

Or maybe a hand job. Have you seen her thumbs (http://freewebpromotion.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/megan_fox_thumbs.jpg)?

They look like they could do some damage to a penis.

[rirv]

if you go for the snog/grope/sexual assailt he'll dig it if he wanted anything at all.
Seriously us men are simple folk and if a girl puts out that's half the key to their heart. He's probably a shy guy who's waiting for you to plant a smooch.

I haven't read any of this thread so sorry if I'm going over old groudn.

Cheers.

[DipDipDive]

Have you seen her thumbs (http://freewebpromotion.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/megan_fox_thumbs.jpg)?

OH MY GOD. :( Her thumb looks like a peewee football middle linebacker. :(

[hpdrifter]

So we have to be worried about our thumbs now too? FUCK!

[nodanaonlyzuul]

So we have to be worried about our thumbs now too? FUCK!

haha seriously. Although she is a bit too skinny for my taste and her Marilyn Monroe tat is ridiculous, her thumbs are not a problem when comparing it to her face.

[cosmo105]

sweet sexy dudes that are clearly way into you are the way to go (y)

[Knuckles]

haha seriously. Although she is a bit too skinny for my taste and her Marilyn Monroe tat is ridiculous, her thumbs are not a problem when comparing it to her face.

Did you look at them? I mean, really look at them.

You could bludgeon a baby seal to death with those. :(

[nodanaonlyzuul]

Maybe she made a deal with the devil. Sold her soul and all. I think that's logical.

"You can be smoking hot BUT you will lack your soul, be dumb, get a cliche and ugly Marylin Monroe tattoo, and have a seriously ugly, fucked up thumb!"

"Sign me up!"

[hpdrifter]

Do you think she knows how dumb she is? If so, do you think she cares? How could you have a normal perspective on anything being that beautiful? Though apparently her thumbs are meant to remind her that she's human.

[mickill]

I didn't read the first post or anything, but there there, Brabs. This too shall pass.

So anyway, while Megan Fox may be a little on the feeble-minded side, talks about passing gas way too much, and has thumbs that resemble my big toes, there is no denying she is a dish.

My 2 pennies.