this guy is too cute

[insertnamehere]

too too cute. he's driving me bonkers

we were at a party the other night and i was trying to not be all up in his grill so i didnt really talk to him that much or anything. we were both balls high, and i watched him from across the room playing with this stuffed kermit the frog. the boy was sitting in a chair pulled up to the corner of the coffee table, and first he was making kermit dance to the music. then he took kermit and very carefull set him on the corner of the table, and very carefully and neatly placed kermits hands in his lap so that he was sitting upright on the corner of the table. then he sat back and just looked at kermit for awhile. they looked like they were having a tea party or something. then he looked at me and he was grinning his face off

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3

i hate my life

[ScarySquirrel]

Homeboy has vicious game. That's for sure.

[Fern]

let him stick it in your dumper . . .

[camo]

Is he 5 years old?

[insertnamehere]

this is the guy i have the crush on that doesnt like me cause im white and chubby, and who i sexually assaulted on halloween. he's about my age.

[kaiser soze]

it's quite apparent his regression is a coping mechanism for the trauma

;)

[insertnamehere]

he also appeared to have not shaved for several days

what have i done to the poor guy

[kaiser soze]

you destroyed him :)

[insertnamehere]

after he left the party, this other guy that i hardly even know came over and started talking to me, and was like, you should tell him you like him! and i was like HOW DID YOU KNOOOOWWWWWWWWW and he said it was "kind of a big thing"

anyway, i talked to random drunk dude and he said i should tell the guy, and i said i knew he wasnt interested, asian fetish, etc. and the guy was like, well you should tell him anyway, and then if he says no, the next time you hang out will be kind of weird but just act like nothing happened and it will be ok. i told him about the sexual assault and he agreed that i might want to wait awhile before i try to have this discussion. he then went on to tell me that he thinks that even if the guy doesnt feel similarly now, he will eventually. he said that a few times actually. i asked him for a justification on thinking that and he said "i just do" and finally said "im drunk" as his response.

i told him im gonna hunt him down in a year and kick his ass when he's proven wrong.

[hpdrifter]

The only redeeming part of the He's Not That Into You movie was at the beginning when it tells you never to listen to anyone that tells you bullshit like that.

[insertnamehere]

i knooooooooooooooooow. its nice to pretend though.

as soon as i find someone i like as much i'll be over it. problem is i never meet people i actually really like like this. he's always so nice and upbeat and happy and funny and adorable even if he is goofy looking and forgot to shave for days



something odd i realized in the course of this thread is that i hate children, but i like guys that have occasionally lapses into childlike behavior

[Ty Webb]

balls high

[Adam]

Well I heard this guy you like loves children (wants several soon) and hates dogs.

Still like him?

[insertnamehere]

i would be willing to adopt asian babies with him, but hating dogs is kind of a deal breaker

except i know he doesnt hate dogs. theres a dog that lives in the house behind his house who's owners leave it outside all the time and the dog gets upset and makes these depressed crying noises when its people leave in the morning.... i know this because i used to live in what it now his bedroom and that dog woke me up every morning. anyway, he occasionally jumps the fence to go play with the dog

[Adam]

Yeah, that dog.is the exception. It used to be his dog but he was so cruel to it the animal police had to take it away from them. He jumps the fence to tease it and make sure it remembers its abuser.

[insertnamehere]

really the only thing im not crazy about is that he smokes way too much pot. i do too, but he smokes way more than me.

[Dorothy Wood]

balls high

that's what I was going to say.



inh, why didn't you go for the drunk guy who gave you advice?

[insertnamehere]

i could list many reasons, but this should suffice: he came up to me to talk about me liking another guy, and to tell me that he thinks the other guy will fall for me eventually. i dont see a good way to "go for him" in that conversation

"oh i really dont think i have a chance with him. you on the other hand... i guess i could settle for you"

[insertnamehere]

WHATS SO WRONG ABOUT BALLS HIGH?

[mikizee]

I dont like being balls high. I get too anxious. I like being just a *bit* high. Yeah. I like that a lot.

[insertnamehere]

I think everyone else was making some kind of commentary on how I phrased it.

[TAL]

Balls deep is better.

[insertnamehere]

i know tal, im trying it's just not working out

[miss soul fire]

he also appeared to have not shaved for several days

what have i done to the poor guy

It wasn't hygiene!

[miss soul fire]

What does "balls high" mean? (Google isn't working! Yeah...hihi)

Can I say "bollocks high" too?? If so, I like it better!(y)


:D

[insertnamehere]

im guessing its take on "high as balls".... from the old rule where really "adjective as explicative" in any case emphasizes the adjective.

[Bob]

i've always heard it as "tripping balls"

and i hear that a LOT

[insertnamehere]

trippin balls i feel like implies that you actually are trippin on some kind of hallucinogen

i have occasionally heard it used when someone is high and freaking out though

[skra75]

i've always heard it as "tripping balls"

and i hear that a LOT

yeah I've never understood what that meant. I mean, I've always felt if I were far-gone on acid the last thing I would be thinking about would be my balls.

[Dorothy Wood]

personally, I just wanted to repeat "balls high" because I'd never heard it.

[Dorothy Wood]

i could list many reasons, but this should suffice: he came up to me to talk about me liking another guy, and to tell me that he thinks the other guy will fall for me eventually. i dont see a good way to "go for him" in that conversation

"oh i really dont think i have a chance with him. you on the other hand... i guess i could settle for you"


nah son, you need to ask yourself why that guy was so interested in paying attention to you.

you totally coulda banged that dude. truth.

[insertnamehere]

nah, ive heard him have conversations with other people about how he doesnt want a girlfriend cause he's too busy and relationships are a pain, etc.

[Dorothy Wood]

you need some different people to hang out with, seriously. people who don't have so many god damn hang ups, geez.


I say go for everyone and everybody you like. not in a creepy way, in an honest way. I don't know anything about anything really, I just know that you have to try. and to be open to possibilities without fearing failure.

[Bob]

you need some different people to hang out with, seriously. people who don't have so many god damn hang ups, geez.


I say go for everyone and everybody you like. not in a creepy way, in an honest way. I don't know anything about anything really, I just know that you have to try. and to be open to possibilities without fearing failure.

easy peasy

[insertnamehere]

you need some different people to hang out with, seriously. people who don't have so many god damn hang ups, geez.


I say go for everyone and everybody you like. not in a creepy way, in an honest way. I don't know anything about anything really, I just know that you have to try. and to be open to possibilities without fearing failure.

so... i should tell the guy i like him? cause thats the opposite of most advice ive gotten. apart from the advice from the drunk guy.

i dont think its so much the people i hang out with as the fact that im just not a very dateable person. when people meet me i dont think they think OH POTENTIAL GIRLFRIEND.

i dunno. im lame. blah.

[sjp]

after he left the party, this other guy that i hardly even know came over and started talking to me, and was like, you should tell him you like him! and i was like HOW DID YOU KNOOOOWWWWWWWWW and he said it was "kind of a big thing"

anyway, i talked to random drunk dude and he said i should tell the guy, and i said i knew he wasnt interested, asian fetish, etc. and the guy was like, well you should tell him anyway, and then if he says no, the next time you hang out will be kind of weird but just act like nothing happened and it will be ok. i told him about the sexual assault and he agreed that i might want to wait awhile before i try to have this discussion. he then went on to tell me that he thinks that even if the guy doesnt feel similarly now, he will eventually. he said that a few times actually. i asked him for a justification on thinking that and he said "i just do" and finally said "im drunk" as his response.

i told him im gonna hunt him down in a year and kick his ass when he's proven wrong.

When I am drunk I find myself giving this kind of advice I have yet to be wrong.

[Dorothy Wood]

so... i should tell the guy i like him? cause thats the opposite of most advice ive gotten. apart from the advice from the drunk guy.

i dont think its so much the people i hang out with as the fact that im just not a very dateable person. when people meet me i dont think they think OH POTENTIAL GIRLFRIEND.

i dunno. im lame. blah.


yeah, tell the guy you like him. the drunk guy was right.

and, I can tell you with certainty that you are hanging out with losers. if you don't want to be a loser too, you need to fuckin stop caring whether or not some asshole thinks you're a "potential girlfriend" or not. this isn't high school. spend time with people who respect you, god damn, girl!

[insertnamehere]

i mean im not saying i want people to think of me as a potential girlfriend. gaaaaah i think there was some miscommunication.

you said i needed to stop hanging out with people with so many hangups... i thought you meant about who they would date. i dont know. im confused. whats wrong with the people im hanging out with again?

i dont think i should tell the guy i like that i like him because its pretty much the most obvious thing ever and everyone else knows, so i dont see any real reason to have to put it in words to his face and have to actually deal with rejection.

[sjp]

trippin balls i feel like implies that you actually are trippin on some kind of hallucinogen

i have occasionally heard it used when someone is high and freaking out though

i was trippin really bad a 2 years ago and thats why i don't smoke any more drank 22 or 23 high lifes, and smoked two or 3 bowls and heard sirens thought the cops were coming for me and ran out of a friends house and down the block with my last 2 beers in my hand and threw them onto the grass turned out to be an ambulance not the cops.

[Dorothy Wood]

i mean im not saying i want people to think of me as a potential girlfriend. gaaaaah i think there was some miscommunication.

you said i needed to stop hanging out with people with so many hangups... i thought you meant about who they would date. i dont know. im confused. whats wrong with the people im hanging out with again?

i dont think i should tell the guy i like that i like him because its pretty much the most obvious thing ever and everyone else knows, so i dont see any real reason to have to put it in words to his face and have to actually deal with rejection.

I don't know, it just sounds like you hang out with a lot of people who have ideas about who is fit to date who, and that you put up with a lot of crap because you're "just one of the guys". and I think it's bullshit.

[insertnamehere]

im pretty sure its me and not them. ive always been put in the friend zone by pretty much everyone i've ever known. its my fault for being so manly.

i went into my friends sub shop where he works once and was talking to him and said something about my ex-boyfriend, and somene that works there that was back in the office popped out and was like, boyfriend?!?! i thought you were a lesbian!!!
:(

[insertnamehere]

additionally, i have to compete with hot college chicks. have you SEEN college chicks? gottdamn

[insertnamehere]

... maybe i'm playin for the wrong team

[Nuzzolese]

additionally, i have to compete with hot college chicks. have you SEEN college chicks? gottdamn


I KNOW! They look like models and they walk around in tiny little shorts all the time and their legs are so rocking. Then when the whether is nice they lay out on the lawn in skimpy bikinis and they don't even care if anyone looks at them. Probably they want you to look at them. They have all this time to go running and tanning and shopping and make themselves look smoking hot. But, because they're in school they're also "interesting." Who can compete with hot college chicks?

[insertnamehere]

i on the other hand, am chubby and lazy. additionally i dont WANT people to look at my chubbyness so i dont lay around in bikinis, or wear shorts at all ever for that matter. which means that im also extremely pale. and i dont know how to dress myself.



i dont stand a chaaaaaaaaance

[cosmo105]

Keep talking about yourself like that! It helps.

CHRIST, SHUT THE HELL UP! EITHER DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT AND STOP COMPLAINING! You will NEVER get ANYWHERE with a shitty attitude like that, and if you talk yourself down so much, everyone else will believe you! I am so sick of self-deprecation! Think you're chubby? Work on feeling better about yourself! Be more active! Take better care of yourself! Fucking get over it already, you sound like a goddamned baby!

[insertnamehere]

LOUD NOISES

nuzz provoked me

i try to do stuff about it but its hard

[Nuzzolese]

Good advice is worth repeating. Just remember what mickill said, especially the last paragraph. Also, while I agree that college chicks are sexy, a lot of them are stupid jerks. So, big deal they have amazing bodies and striking bone structure and supple, bronzed skin and gleaming perfect smiles. That's not everything!



dear insertnamehere,

Lucky for you, guys are the simpler/less complicated of the two sexes. See, women (that aren't train wreck attention whores) tend to have their guards up most (if not all) of the time around men whom they've just met. Statistically speaking, a female has a 10 in 10 chance of finding a guy at a bar who will willingly bang her that night, compared to a guy's 1 in 5 chance of doing the same with a chick. This is not to say that I encourage rampant, shortsighted, irresponsible humping with strangers, but I'm saying a woman generally has a 100% chance of getting laid (without paying), at any time of day, wherever the place.

But trying to reel in a decent catch is the hard part for a girl. I can admit that men, for the most part, are somewhat hopeless. I was seemingly hopeless at one point too. I can admit that. But inside of even the most barbaric, un-groomed, immature, hornball dude, there lurk two beings: the inner child and the inner dad. You can help to bring either one to the surface, depending on your preference. But most women would probably prefer a balance of the two. The inner child is fun and adventurous, and the inner dad is the take charge/protective/responsible, and possibly even loyal of the two. The bottom line is, if you're on the date with a guy, he already wants to sleep with you anyway.

The objective for most girls is to gauge whether they want something more from the guy. The D is already in place. You can have the D regardless. Today. But do you want the D to be exclusive to you? Obviously, you need to go on the date to find out. But now, you have to try and set the tone for the rest of the time he is going to be "courting" you (aka, waiting to hump). Which inner being do you want dominating this period? You have to provide the clues (meaning, ensure that it is blatantly obvious that you prefer one personality over the other).

Also, this may seem somewhat sexist or semi-distasteful, but if you believe that there are distinct gender traits, then you probably already perceive men as "hunters" and women as "prey". Generally, women desire companionship and men just want to conquer as much tail as humanly possible. This is just nature. Women are more naturally inclined to be satisfied with one partner, while men have to fight the urge to not want to hump other girls. It's how we're designed.

If your problem is getting a date in the first place, it basically comes down to one thing: advertising. Presentation is everything. You have to be willing to put in the time and effort it takes to get a guy to notice you. Obviously, some people don't have to. Life isn't fair. If you're not one of those people that just get to effortlessly knock people out with your charm and beauty, you might have to try a little harder. Just three things will determine the grade of dude you're going to be able to pull: personality, intelligence and appearance. If you're sorely lacking in more than one of these areas, try to work on another. Very few people will ever master all three. But most decent guys are only looking for two. For a guy who isn't any kind of a catch, you could probably get by with zero to half of one of those qualities. Intelligence is the most difficult to fake, so if you have that, you're holding some decent cards. And remember, confidence is everything.

[insertnamehere]

i think my personality is pretty ballin' and im reasonably intelligent. im not an ogre im just not hot. i dont know. maybe my personality is less awesome than i think? i really dont know exactly where my problem is but i think personality and intellegence are alright, so i just assume its looks.


i could probably go out on dates with boys, but not boys i want to go on dates with. i had a guy ask me out about a year ago and i turned him down. thats really the only time ive ever been asked out though. i think ive said it before, but its very rare that i feel attracted to someone and thusfar its just never worked out to where i felt attracted to someone who also felt attracted to me.

[insertnamehere]

When I am drunk I find myself giving this kind of advice I have yet to be wrong.

srsly?

[Adam]

I think I've been reading the tone of this thread different to others. I was reading inh comments as a light-hearted breezy tone while others have read it in a whiny depressed tone. I don't know which true?

Maybe a little of both?

[insertnamehere]

i was mostly joking about the hot college chicks, as was nuzz im assuming.

sort of half and half with the whole thing. you should rarely take anything i say 100% seriously. not that the facts ive disclosed in this thread arent true.

people always seem to think im being a lot whinier on here than i feel i actually am. adam i am happy you dont think im a whiny bitchface.

[Dorothy Wood]

being a tomboy might cut your options a bit, but it doesn't mean that nobody's going to like you.

bleh. there's room for all types of people in this world. and you also need to stop thinking that college is the only time you're gonna have friends and get a boyfriend.

my friend was like you kinda. she didn't even lose her virginity until she was 26 when she got her first real boyfriend. everyone thought she was awesome and she had a ton of friends and made out with dudes plenty...but for whatever reason, nothing really worked out with actually dating guys. we had some tough nights man, lots of crying and shit. but her boyfriend (a friend of a friend who moved to town) saw her and liked her right away for who she was, and then they fell in love and they're still together 4 years later. gross! (y)


so yeah, just, gah...I dunno, your friends sound like assholes. maybe that's just how young people treat each other these days?

[insertnamehere]

they treat me fine. they just dont want to date me. i dont think that makes them assholes.

ive been trying to talk to the guy less so im not all up in his grill. i talked to him on aim on tues and he seemed to be back to his normal friendly self, so i think he's gotten over the halloween incident. he uses a lot of smiley faces. i like to think that guys use a lot of smiley faces when they're flirting because bitches love smiley faces. :)

i told him that i wanted a lesson on how to operate a motorcycle (not actually ride it but you know, this is how you start it, this is how you change gears, etc) and to sit on it and make vroom vroom sounds and he said he could do that so tonight i might ask if i can come over saturday...

solid plan?

[checkyourprez]

they treat me fine. they just dont want to date me. i dont think that makes them assholes.

ive been trying to talk to the guy less so im not all up in his grill. i talked to him on aim on tues and he seemed to be back to his normal friendly self, so i think he's gotten over the halloween incident. he uses a lot of smiley faces. i like to think that guys use a lot of smiley faces when they're flirting because bitches love smiley faces. :)

i told him that i wanted a lesson on how to operate a motorcycle (not actually ride it but you know, this is how you start it, this is how you change gears, etc) and to sit on it and make vroom vroom sounds and he said he could do that so tonight i might ask if i can come over saturday...

solid plan?

post your pic in the fam thread.

[insertnamehere]

ugh id rather not


good photos of me are a rarity

[Adam]

post your pic in the fam thread.

last picture I saw was very pixellated (years ago though). I said then I'd do her.

But then I don't like dogs (as in the four-legged kind (Not ugly women)) so I think I'd soon be kicked out of bed.

Read that back and it sounds like I like ugly women - luckily most women are beautiful so you could say that is true (like all those over 110lbs).

[insertnamehere]

haha yeah my first take on that was, "i'd do her except i dont like dogs"... except i knew that wasnt what you meant

wait... you dont like dogs? :(


im the confused looking one http://photos-h.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs076.snc3/14333_526671095445_70402193_31151940_3888032_n.jpg

[checkyourprez]

not what i pictured.

[insertnamehere]

ps- thats not photoshopped or whatever. that was some weirdness that the camera keeps capturing light after the camera takes or some such thing. in any case im not responsible for the light swirls.

[Adam]

Oh, should of said this from the start. If you want to compliment how a guy looks, don't call him 'cute'. Call him handsome or rugged or some shit. Words like cute & pretty will just make him feel less of a man - a macho type word will increase his boner.

Disclaimer: Man, I'm BALLS HIGH right now - need to eat.

[insertnamehere]

not what i pictured.

haha, dare i ask what you pictured?

[insertnamehere]

adam - i was balls high in that photograph. its from the night i was telling you i was balls high.


do guys really get bothered at being called cute? i'll be sure to call him badass from now on then.

[Adam]

I so know that dude you're about to throttle.

No, I don't like dogs. I thought you knew and the reason why you stopped talking to me on aim :p

[insertnamehere]

WELL IT'S THE REASON NOW


what?

[Miho]

I don't know why you say you're not attractive, you are... Quit putting yourself down, anyway.

[checkyourprez]

haha, dare i ask what you pictured?

i pictured a hopeless chick.

you have potential. you should go on one of those makeover shows where they do you all up with makeup and new clothes and stuff. i bet you'd surprise yourself. and some dudes in the process.

[Adam]

or try doing something sober with him. I've just had a read back and it seems you're normally intoxicated when you're with him. Sometimes sober is better (but not often).

[Ty Webb]

Good News: You could both do better.

[Ty Webb]

just joshin ya

[insertnamehere]

i pictured a hopeless chick.

you have potential. you should go on one of those makeover shows where they do you all up with makeup and new clothes and stuff. i bet you'd surprise yourself. and some dudes in the process.

oh i know i could fix up nicer. i just dont really know how, and also am poor.

[checkyourprez]

oh i know i could fix up nicer. i just dont really know how, and also am poor.



thats where the show comes in. duh.

[sjp]

srsly?

seriously i don't know why though.

[lolkat]

Rich girls are HOT
Poor girls are NOT


Bitch

[checkyourprez]

Rich girls are HOT
Poor girls are NOT


Bitch


hah yoooo what

[sjp]

ps- thats not photoshopped or whatever. that was some weirdness that the camera keeps capturing light after the camera takes or some such thing. in any case im not responsible for the light swirls.

i thought you were cute smile and don't get down on your self