Strip Clubs

[DipDipDive]

My boyfriend is going to a strip club with his dude friends in a few weeks. I just really don't want him to get a lap dance. I want to be the only person who grinds on his crotch, goddamnit. Is that so wrong? Help me find a way to not let this bother me, please.

:-/

[kaiser soze]

dump him now

[paul jones]

Hmmm,not sure what to say but at least he's told you about it.

At least he's not going to a gay bar but I think it would be wrong for a lap dance as they are totally pointless I think.

Suprise him when he gets back by doing a lap dance on him yourself or just ask him how it went.He'll love you more if you show it doesn't bother you and that you trust him eh? (y)

[DipDipDive]

dump him now

That seems excessive.

[camo]

He'll be getting flack from you for going and then flack from his mates should he not go. Tough call.

I'm sure that between yourself you can come to an agreement where he can go but he promise to not get a dance. As long as he respects that it's put you in a difficult situation then you should be ok.

[Bob]

go with him and glare at any strippers who come near him

[DipDipDive]

He'll be getting flack from you for going and then flack from his mates should he not go. Tough call.

I'm sure that between yourself you can come to an agreement where he can go but he promise to not get a dance. As long as he respects that it's put you in a difficult situation then you should be ok.

I don't care if he goes. I do care if another lady's naked tits are in his face.

I'm an extremely low-maintenance girlfriend. I don't want him to buy me shit, I don't enjoy being showered with compliments, I'd prefer to be on his couch than to go out on dates, etc., so the rare times like this one when I need my needs fulfilled (ie for him to not have a topless female stranger straddle his privates), I feel guilty and overbearing. It sucks.

[paul jones]

I feel guilty and overbearing. It sucks.

Don't be.All those strippys have fake bazoomas.

[NicRN77]

I don't care if he goes. I do care if another lady's naked tits are in his face.


that's pretty much a given that naked tits will be in his face.

don't worry about it...it isn't like he frequents strip clubs often!

[kaiser soze]

take him to the clinic the next day and tell him it's because you love him

[DipDipDive]

You're not very good at giving advice.

[paul jones]

You're not very good at giving advice.

tell him you don't want him to go.the only one he should want to see naked is you.

[NicRN77]

I don't really think you have anything to worry about....men NEED to look at other naked women. It is in their DNA or something. You know your dude. He will come home to you. Maybe a surprise lap dance from you would be good upon his return. (y)

[DipDipDive]

tell him you don't want him to go.the only one he should want to see naked is you.

Haha! PJ, I was addressing kaiser soze specifically. The rest of you have given fine advice and I thank you. :)

[paul jones]

Haha! PJ, I was addressing kaiser soze specifically. The rest of you have given fine advice and I thank you. :)

(y) thanks pal.I'm gonna go and have a cigarette in the back garden to celebrate.:)

[Bob]

demand to smell his dick when he comes home

[DipDipDive]

:(

[b i o n i c]

if you're gonna let him, i think the best way to not care about it is that - whoever the stripper is - she's likely thinking about how much money she's making that night, how soon she can be done with her shift and how fast she can get the hell out of there and count her money. strippers suuuuuuck, man. they reallly do

and give him something real and good when he comes home.

[kaiser soze]

yeah, give him a delicious sandwich when he gets home

[The Notorious LOL]

if you're gonna let him, i think the best way to not care about it is that - whoever the stripper is - she's likely thinking about how much money she's making that night, how soon she can be done with her shift and how fast she can get the hell out of there and count her money. strippers suuuuuuck, man. they reallly do

and give him something real and good when he comes home.

That is a sweeping generalization. One of my friends is a dancer and goes to school and she definitely doesn't suck. Some of her friends from said place of employment make me think Im going to end up getting arrested when they come out with us though.

[Bob]

:(

just when he walks through the door say "let me smell yo dick" in a sort of lighthearted "ha ha i'm joking but not really" kind of way and see how he reacts. wait until he falls asleep if you have to

[Rodie]

Here's my take: My wife is not at all the type of woman that would be okay with me going to a strip club. Frankly I think women that don't care if their man goes to a strip club really just don't care about the relationship. I'm not saying it's right for a woman to forbid a man from going but telling him that you're not cool with it is not a big deal at all. I don't know how long you guys have been dating but you should really tell him that you're not okay with it (and if you say you are, but you're not okay with tits in his face, well... I think that means that you aren't). Anyway, I know you said that you don't want to seem overbearring, but you won't. It's called being respectful. If you are as low maintenance as you claim to be than not doing this shouldn't be a problem for your boyfriend. It sounds like you're both pretty young so his friends will give him shit, but they'll get over it.

For the record I've never been to a strip club (or desired to go to one) because it just seems like it would be weird and depressing. Plus in my head I imagine they smell really bad. I have had the opportunity to go before and after I got married and just didn't care to. I'm not forbidden from going, I'd just get a bunch of shit for it.

[sjp]

Is the strip club a full nude one?

[jabumbo]

how do you expect her to get the titties into his face without straddling a little bit? she's not made of rubber, you know.

[DipDipDive]

That is a sweeping generalization. One of my friends is a dancer and goes to school and she definitely doesn't suck. Some of her friends from said place of employment make me think Im going to end up getting arrested when they come out with us though.

This is hilarious for several reasons.

Anyways, tits in the face are inevitable at a strip club...this I know. But when I say I don't want there to be tits in his face, I mean I don't want him to be in a these-tits-are-within-sucking-distance type of situation. In other words, being the recipient of a lap dance. I think that's where I'll need to draw the line. Strip club patronage = I'd rather he didn't, but I'm not going to stop him or even try to. Lap dance receiving = totally not okay/could potentially result in my disinterest in being penetrated by that which a stripper sat on.

That's fair, right?

Thanks for the wise words, Rodie. For the record, we've been together for six months but it's serious because we're actually not young. He's 28, I'm 27. At any rate, I appreciate your understanding of the female perspective in this kind of situation.

[The Notorious LOL]

feel free to break down the hilarity

[DipDipDive]

haha I just remembered a few months back the boyfriend said something off the cuff about never wanting stripper boobs in his mouth no matter how nice they are. I should replay that comment on a loop in my head on the night of his man date...

[DipDipDive]

feel free to break down the hilarity

Nah it'll stay funnier in my mind.

[The Notorious LOL]

How passive aggressively Minnesotan of you. (y)

[DipDipDive]

Okay then, since you took it there, I'll just make the one obvious point that when it comes to creation of sweeping generalizations, you're the most gifted master artisan I've ever met, so to criticize someone else for making one (and about STRIPPERS of all topics) is quite hysterical to me.

Plus, you at a strip club lol.

[RobMoney$]

5 STARS

[The Notorious LOL]

Opinion noted.

I dont go to strip clubs.

I'm leaving it at that.

[DipDipDive]

PS Let's make an important distinction here...Ballerinas are "dancers." Bitches who sway around naked on a black-lit stage to shitty Warrant songs and rub greasy poles between their tits are strippers.

[DandyFop]

What kind of communication has there been between you two so far about it? Does he know you aren't a big fan?

It might be a fun opportunity to sex things up for you like people were saying. You could not saying anything until maybe the day he's going and then text/say in person "have fun, but you might want to hurry home because I'm going to show those girls up". Wow I really hate myself for typing that, but you know what I mean. Then chances are when he's at the club, he might be getting turned on but he'll also be thinking of the sweet action he's going to get when he goes back to his lady.

[mickill]

PS Let's make an important distinction here...Ballerinas are "dancers." Bitches who sway around naked on a black-lit stage to shitty Warrant songs and rub greasy poles between their tits are strippers.

I just wanted to say that this is the best thing that I have EVER EVER EVER read....today.

[Bob]

I just wanted to say that this is the best thing that I have EVER EVER EVER read....today.

same here, except it's 12:15 am here and i haven't really read much in the last 15 minutes

[cosmo105]

I probably wouldn't be super comfortable with my guy going to a strip club either. And I'd kill him if he got a lap dance. I should probably just do it anyway.* But yeah, most strip joints (though obviously not all) are grodes and most strippers (again, not all) are also not so great. Most guys I've talked to about it have confided that it's disgusting. So yeah, just talk to him about it. It's not a needy thing by any means. That shit is just too far for someone in a committed relationship. He should understand.

*Just confirmed, he WOULD go to a strip club with his dude friends but WOULD NOT get a lapdance. Poisoning his milk. Will report back with updates.

[ms.peachy]

Frankly I think women that don't care if their man goes to a strip club really just don't care about the relationship.

Well, I'm not quite sure what to say to that. I'm pretty sure I actually care rather a lot about our marriage, but I'm honestly just not all that fussed about him going to a strip bar once in a blue moon. I think the last time mr.p went to one was in Vegas about 8 years ago, and it's kind of a funny story... but anyway, it's not something I can get worked up about. Now, if he was going regularly, and spending money on it that would be better spent on things like, oh, our kid's college fund, that sort of thing, then hell yes I would mind, I would mind a great deal. But the occasional one-off for a bachelor party or whatever, naaah, no big deal. 'Go, have fun, look at boobies; just have a shower when you get in so you don't come to bed stinking of cigars and ass-sweat' is pretty much how I feel about it.

ddd, I can't tell you how to feel about it; if you are unhappy about the lap-dance aspect of it then you have a right to say so and ask him to respect that.

[TurdBerglar]

never been to a strip club

maybe i should try that out one day

[mickill]

I'm not really big on going to strip clubs. I can't get past the sleaze factor. Meaning, I feel sleazy. I don't frown upon it or anything. I just kinda personally feel uncomfortable with it. I've been maybe 3 times in total. One of those times was with a group that included my wife anyway. This is also not to say that I don't like boobs or nothing like that. But if I acted on every single impulse and every thing I'd like to do I'd be killing at least 3 people per day due to road rage alone and have 30 wives.

But yeah, I just don't bother going there with the wife. Partly out of respect for her, and partly because I've trained myself to avoid getting nagged at, for the sake of my sanity.

[paul jones]

never been to a strip club

maybe i should try that out one day

do it soon and report back

[mickill]

I also opted out of my own stripper-fueled bachelor party after finding out about it. It was going to happen at a friend's apartment, which seemed even more inappropriate. Said friend wasn't really an advocate of marriage, as well, and never really understood parameters, just in general. I also felt uncomfortable with the idea of it happening two nights before I was getting married. I had my brother make up some excuse to get me out of it and the whole thing was canceled. It's not like we were all going away for a weekend or anything, it was just a night of strippers and booze. There weren't any hard feelings I don't think.

I sometimes regret it.

[The Notorious LOL]

never been to a strip club

maybe i should try that out one day

9 times out of 10 it sounds more interesting than it actually is.

A friend included attendance to one as a part of his bachelor party last fall, and myself and a few others spent far more time at the bar next door than we did in the club. In that environment, it tends to be loud and the focus almost has to be on the girls...which of course is intentional.

I find it sort of like going into the store to by a Gatorade...except it involves a half nude woman. There is about as much emotion involved in the transaction. That being said, I understand the market for it and don't see it as a bad thing. I do think anyone in a serious relationship (from a male perspective) that attends will see it in probably a much, much less sexual light than his female counterpart may perceive it as.

[Echewta]

Strip clubs in America are certainly tame to those in some European countries. Hope that makes you feel better.

[Laserface]

i went twice, and found them to be boring and a big waste of money. and kind of depressing, also.
i don't want to get a lap dance unless the girl herself wants to turn me on for non-remunerable purposes.
i guess that's where the sleazy part comes from - making girls do things they wouldn't really want to do.

[Adam]

Strip Clubs in america are far better than the ones in the UK. It seems far more normal over there and less smelly of sweat and fish.

But, I am the type of person who is uncomfortable in a lapdance - maybe I just want the free show, but I dunno. It doesn't make me horny or anything, just more "hehe, boobs" in my mind. I'm happy to highly tip the waitresses etc but getting involved any further than a observer I ain't into.

I think you're well within your rights to ask him not to get a lapdance, he won't know you're not cool with this unless you tell him.

[Rodie]

Well, I'm not quite sure what to say to that. I'm pretty sure I actually care rather a lot about our marriage, but I'm honestly just not all that fussed about him going to a strip bar once in a blue moon. I think the last time mr.p went to one was in Vegas about 8 years ago, and it's kind of a funny story... but anyway, it's not something I can get worked up about. Now, if he was going regularly, and spending money on it that would be better spent on things like, oh, our kid's college fund, that sort of thing, then hell yes I would mind, I would mind a great deal. But the occasional one-off for a bachelor party or whatever, naaah, no big deal. 'Go, have fun, look at boobies; just have a shower when you get in so you don't come to bed stinking of cigars and ass-sweat' is pretty much how I feel about it.

I can see that. I've just known some girls/women that are a little too easy-going. Pointing out "hot girls" (often), having boyfriends/husbands that go to strip clubs monthly, etc. I just feel like these types have insecurity issues and are overcompensating by acting like they're completely cool with it. And the guys they are with are completely oblivious. I may be way off base though. That's obviously not your situation though and I could see it not being an issue at all for some women if it's so infrequent.

DDD - my bad on the age issue, not sure why I thought that. In any case hope everything works out for the best.

mickill - I had my bachelor party altered so I know where you're coming from. My best man approached my fiance about it before hand and she said if that was what I really wanted we could do it. I told him that it wasn't what I wanted to do for my bachelor party. I doubt he believed me, but I don't really care. I asked if we could go to Halloween Horror Nights instead, got drunk, and had much more fun than I imagine we would have we had been in a strip club. Of course he made sure to tell me that when he gets married he wants to go to a strip club. So unimaginative. :rolleyes:

[kaiser soze]

I think I'm gonna go take a shit and report back

[HEIRESS]

In Canada, they drip hot wax on their vahjays and then let people in the audience rip it off.

I've only been in a strip club once. I got kicked out because I didn't have 2 pieces of ID (I was 20 at the time) but I tried to argue that I wasn't drinking anyways and that I worked at the time @ a liquor store so obviously I was of age. Also they should have checked out my ID at the door, not half an hour after I had been in the joint.

Anyways they tried kicking me out with the "female" bouncer and I was all "nah uh, bring me the REAL bouncer and then I'll leave"

Finally they did so I was escorted out while ranting that they should check the ID of the girls dancing on stage because I was pretty sure I was older than ALL of them.

I also pointed out that they weren't just kicking me out, all 12 of my friends and their potential drink tabs were also walking out with me. FOOLS.

weee... :/

[Kid Presentable]

When I was in King's Cross I was told that it wouldn't be cool for me to go to the strippers, which I respected. My bro-in-law and I were joking about going, and it didn't go down well with her. I wasn't going to go anyway, but self-preservation taught me to act grateful for the pointer.

I haven't been since my buck's night (sorry Rodie, we tried to be creative and go cross-country skiing but snow is a cunt to find round these parts), and I only used to go occasionally when I worked in sales. Often with females.

Strippers are good bitches for the most part, relaxed about their bodies, and they can pay for stuff. What chick doesn't like money, right? Nah but seriously, they're not interested in stealing your boyfriend. You should tell him how you feel but; it's obviously already an issue and think of the poor unsuspecting bastard's situation if you get mad and he has to play the old favourite 'guessing game' for half the night.

I say old favourite - it's easy to win - "Let me guess: you're upset about something" WIN

[Echewta]

In Canada, they drip hot wax on their vahjays and then let people in the audience rip it off.


And why didn't NBC cover this during the Olympics?

[hpdrifter]

Ah you boys and your bachelor parties.

My husband got a two-girl show, licked a boob and an inner thigh and had the stripper pick up a dollar bill off his nose. With her pussy.

Anyway, DDD, I suggest you get some of your friends together on said night (girls, guys, whatever) and go to a strip club yourself (not the same one as him). I've been to lots of them and you should see for yourself what it's like. I think if you do you'll realize where all of this fear is coming from.

[hpdrifter]

Fuck, I haven't been in awhile.

If I had the means I'd come out to Chicago and go with you.

Stupid paying for two places to live. :mad:

[yeahwho]

If i were you I would just mention in passing one more time, "Hey I would really appreciate it if you do not get a lap dance while you are at the strip club" then immediately pull out a cordless drill and install a home pole (http://www.kegworks.com/product.php?productid=20954&source=base) to keep the flame alive.

Plus everything bob has suggested makes perfect sense.

[nodanaonlyzuul]

^uuuuugh I would kill my boyfriend if he did that. Kill. Like, stab him with a shank repeatedly. In his stomach. Then his groin.

But, Frankly I think women that don't care if their man goes to a strip club really just don't care about the relationship.

What Ms.Peachy said to this was perfect.

I've been to a strip club with my man and I was the one that got the lap dance just because I was curious, drunk, and in Vegas.

My boyfriend says he's really grossed out by lapdances. He says all he can think about are the girls are all over so many men in one night and that's not at all hot. But his guy friends will probably make him go at some point when we get engaged. The fact that I know he's not the one rallying to go or wouldn't actually desire a lap dance though means I'm fine with it. I don't mind him just looking at tits. When we went together I'd point out the nice ones for him if there were multiple girls around the place. (y)

[hpdrifter]

Well, I wasn't allowed to feel and definitely not say anything about it. It was his party, I could do whatever I wanted at my party.

I sorta wish I'd gone to a strip club. And gotten up on stage. And given a few lap dances. I looked freaking hot at my bachelorette. Everywhere I went people told me. I was slender and toned and tanned and had my makeup done professional like and my outfit was bangin'. I was sexy. I want to have that party again only this time not get married and be able to bang the DJ at the club who looked like John Cusak.

I don't think I'll ever look better than I did at my bachelorette and wedding.

Oh well, someone mentioned the crazy aaaaaand here it comes.

[nodanaonlyzuul]

Well, I wasn't allowed to feel and definitely not say anything about it. It was his party, I could do whatever I wanted at my party.

good fucking riddens to that guy. Seriously.

Just reading that makes me want to stab him for you.

[jabumbo]

since when did warrant ever make a shitty song?

[hpdrifter]

Yeah, giving a shit about how I felt was not his strong suit when it was in conflict with something he wanted to do.

Man, I wish I wasn't so broke. I want to come to NorCal and go out with you guys! I'm so lonely. I have my friends which has been great and a godsend but I want to go somewhere new and meet some new people. Also, I need some masculine attention. I want to go to a nice chill neighborhood bar and meet a nice chill neighborhood guy. And bang him.

Judge me if you want, assholes.

Sorry, DDD. This is your thread.

[synch]

Was in Antwerp with a bunch of friends and ended up in a strip club.

Someone ordered a lapdance for me.

I told the missus afterwards and she wasn't amused, but I explained that the trip wasn't planned, I didn't order the lapdance and it was more of a male bonding than female groping thing. It was all pretty tame. No full nudity, people were laughing, girls seemed to be enjoying themselves and we didn't plan the trip around getting some girls to sit in our lap. She still wasn't thrilled about it but she kinda understood.

Funniest thing about the visit was that one of the guys I was with asked if he could go onto the stage. They introduced him as "loverboy" and he totally upstaged the topless chick on the stage at the time.

At the end of the performance a waitress shoved a 5 euro bill (7 us$) in his boxer shorts (his shirt was on the floor and his pants around his ankles at the time).

That was definitely the highlight of the evening.

[Echewta]

I looked freaking hot at my bachelorette. Everywhere I went people told me. I was slender and toned and tanned and had my makeup done professional like and my outfit was bangin'. I was sexy. I want to have that party again only this time not get married and be able to bang the DJ at the club who looked like John Cusak.

I don't think I'll ever look better than I did at my bachelorette and wedding.

Oh well, someone mentioned the crazy aaaaaand here it comes.




Sorry, DDD. This is your thread.


I certainly don't mind if you continue to hijack this thread. Please continue.

[nodanaonlyzuul]

hp, no one is judging. At least I'm not. It's not the same but my ex I was with for 4 years... yeah I was definitely in that kind of free spirited mood for a bit. And to be honest if you haven't been through that kind of stage in your life yet it's good to get out of your system anyway. IMO. ;)

[monkey]

ive never gotten a lapdance, but ive certainly given one. in public. on a stage. though i was fully clothed, and it was for the benefit of my oldest, dearest lady friend (and i was drunk as a skunk), and we were being cheered on by a tranny named Mizz Paulina. It was magical.

advice-wise: honesty is the best policy. if you dont want your man to get a lapdance, let him know. obviously, you aren't saying HE CANT, you're just asking him not to because it would bother you. i figure a reasonable person would be able to take his sig. other's feelings into consideration. i'm sure he wouldn't think of it as needy, and if the situation were reversed, you'd be willing to take his feelings into consideration in regards to junks in your face, right?

[JimmyTheScumbag]

Just blow him really good minutes before he goes and then tell him if he stinks when he gets home there won't be anymore where that came from.

[DIGI]

^Dude, I just started listening to some of those cds you sent me. Good shit!

[Kid Presentable]

My boyfriend says he's really grossed out by lapdances. He says all he can think about are the girls are all over so many men in one night and that's not at all hot.

I mean, yeah, you have to say stuff like this.

[nodanaonlyzuul]

I know his sexual history as well. Pretty positive he is telling the truth. Truth be told he's a goody two shoes.

[Kid Presentable]

Cool man, more power.

[Freebasser]

The idea that I'd have to pay a woman to dance for me is fucking rank.

Never been into strip clubs - I'm more the hopeless romantic type than a beefer.

[RobMoney$]

I can never decide who's being exploited more, the guys who go there and fork over all their cash for the illusion of female interaction, or the girl who's selling the last shred of self-respect she has for a buck?

[Echewta]

If I was in a relationship, the only way I would go to a strip club was if it was for a bachlor party for a very close friend or if the girl I was with wanted to check one out.

Other than that, I enjoy my money and not smelling baby powder.

[hpdrifter]

.

[mikizee]

Yeah I dont see the appeal of lapdances at all.

You pay $50, it lasts for 5 minutes, and you cant even touch them! Its like paying someone to eat an awesome steak right in front of you. That you cant touch.

For $50 I could go to the brothel down the street and actually get a blowjob. Not that I would do that. Pros arent my thing.

So yeah, I dont understand lapdances. Whats the point? You can see them butt naked on stage right in front of you for free. For them to be naked 2 feet closer it costs $50?? GTFO.

[Echewta]

.

Thank you ;)

[RobMoney$]

I think most guys grow out of strip clubs after a while.
They're soo cliche.

The pros go to the private whore parties where they're allowed to touch.
What can I say, I love seeing dirty girls naked :D

[Bob]

shock

[skra75]

I know his sexual history as well. Pretty positive he is telling the truth. Truth be told he's a goody two shoes.

Haha when I read this I thought you said goofy two shoes.
Also yeah he's lying so to not hurt your feelings. Lying or he has missed out on an importantbig step in his adult life. My $$ says he's bullshitting. I have amazing bullshit radar.

[Myu-to]

Been a couple of times for bachelor parties including one of mine. Turned down the lapdance, and she was fucking gorgeous. I was disgusted by the way my married friends were behaving, and the free buffet was not that good. My second bachelor party was at a sports bar. We smoked cigars, drank, played pool and darts until they closed. Definitely better than a strip club.

[mickill]

I know his sexual history as well. Pretty positive he is telling the truth. Truth be told he's a goody two shoes.

It's like this, if you want to know how it really is. And I hate to shatter the little glass bubble you've seemingly allowed your boyfriend to form around whatever part of your brain it is that's supposed to detect bullshit, so apologize to him for me if this actually breaks the trance he's worked so hard to keep you in all this time...but EVERY guy that isn't gay in some way or another wants to put his penis in EVERY girl that he finds attractive and would IF HE WERE ALLOWED TO. That's just the way men are designed. We are predators by nature. The mere fact that we have to resist these carnal instincts every second of our existence is evidence enough that nature has an insanely cruel sense of humor. The enduring factors prohibiting us from engaging in said rampant boning with random women at all given hours of the day (civil disapproval, laws, spouses, our principles - if applicable, fatigue, general opposition from prospective partners etc) are basically what keep us in line. Because yeah, trying to nail every single chick you think is the least bit attractive is more than likely always going to be somewhat frowned upon pretty much everywhere in the world for like forever. Some women can relate, most have no idea why the hell we are like this, but this is just the way are designed. We sure as hell aren't always going to willingly admit this to you, but it's true. We are all disgusting perverts, we just aren't allowed to be, so we try not to keep it to a minimum.

[mickill]

I was reading some more of these other comments and I just wanted to add that if you don't trust your dude to be in such close proximity to strippers, don't immediately disregard it as your own personal insecurities, your female intuition is just trying to warn you. You're not supposed to ignore those instincts, because YES, your man would hump a stripper he finds attractive if he were a) allowed to, b) felt safe doing so, and c) didn't have to part with very much cash. This is not to say you need to do something about it, because your man could very well be trustworthy. There really are decent men out there. We exist. But the urge to be decent does not in any way come naturally to any guy.

[Adam]

^While I'd say thats kinda true - I think they are mainly fantasies and social responsibility stops most men doing this. You think of the consequences of such actions would have on every other situation in life. Like, what your friends/family would think, would you still be friends, would a potential life partner disapprove etc

So we would like to put our penis in lots of other vaginas but we know its not worth the short sexual satisfaction when the potential of our social satisfaction is at stake.

I get your point, I tried to clarify but reading that back I don't think I have. Men are visual beings, we might look a lot but we know not to touch too much just to stay on terms with fellow women-kind which is a better thing in the long run.

[mickill]

Yeah, but that's why I'm saying that if you take away all that (societal views, morals, consequence etc), our primal instincts dictate to us that we need to bone as many women (preferably of assorted varieties) as we can.

[Adam]

Yup, we have the same point...

So then on the same account - in the animal kingdom, generally females wouldn't think twice about dumping one partner for another who can provide better or let two males fight to the death for mating rights. Again, we all have kinda grown past that. Both sexes have can hold such a gun to each others head in that sense - its not just the males who have rule over the relationships.

[Guy Incognito]

agree with both of you, the thought of it occurs then the responsibility chip kicks in very quickly.

also, going to a stirp show with yer mates or whatever is a good laugh but lapdances, never seen the appeal. I know some guys like the tease of the thing but to me it'd just be frustrating plus i'd be very aware that the girl is doing a job and is probably thinking about what she's going to have for tea and not really into it, just being paid for being into it

[synch]

Yeah I dont see the appeal of lapdances at all.

You pay $50, it lasts for 5 minutes, and you cant even touch them! Its like paying someone to eat an awesome steak right in front of you. That you cant touch.

For $50 I could go to the brothel down the street and actually get a blowjob. Not that I would do that. Pros arent my thing.

So yeah, I dont understand lapdances. Whats the point? You can see them butt naked on stage right in front of you for free. For them to be naked 2 feet closer it costs $50?? GTFO.50? Seriously? In Antwerp they were 5 euro's (still 7 us$, unless the economy collapsed overnight, which it didn't, I checked just in case) and you got a free voucher for one with the 10 euro admission. My guess is that if we didn't get free vouchers then nobody would have gone out of their way to pay for one.

Glass of vodka was 7 euro though. Fuckers.

If we were really there for the lapdances then at five bucks a piece we'd have pretty much moved in.

We went for kebab instead.

[trailerprincess]

Yeah I dont see the appeal of lapdances at all.

You pay $50, it lasts for 5 minutes, and you cant even touch them! Its like paying someone to eat an awesome steak right in front of you. That you cant touch.

For $50 I could go to the brothel down the street and actually get a blowjob. Not that I would do that. Pros arent my thing.

So yeah, I dont understand lapdances. Whats the point? You can see them butt naked on stage right in front of you for free. For them to be naked 2 feet closer it costs $50?? GTFO.

I <3 mikizee (especially for the lapdance vs steak comparison)

[RobMoney$]

shock


I have the same reaction to your sexual status.

[Lyman Zerga]

You pay $50, it lasts for 5 minutes, and you cant even touch them! Its like paying someone to eat an awesome steak right in front of you. That you cant touch.



i dont get it either, i mean it's nice to look at but i would never waste money for it

[hpdrifter]

mikey, if you actually believe any of that what are you gonna do about your daughter in a coupla years?

[nodanaonlyzuul]

ha, you guys are funny.

I'm not saying he never thinks about fucking other women he finds attractive. I know he does, that's nature. I know of several women in various forms that he thinks are crazy hot. That doesn't bother me. I think other men are hot too and I get a quick image flash of wanting to stick their head on my crotch.

What I was saying is that he just doesn't find a stripper that's had her tits and vag all over several other men within the same hour attractive.

[nodanaonlyzuul]

p.s. I'm actually insulted that you all really thought I was that dense.

We're talking strip clubs in particular in this thread so that is what I was referring to. :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

That's right, three eye rolls for you guys. Because I love you enough to show how annoyed I am.

[hpdrifter]

Yeah, it's not just a guy thing to fantasize about sex with other people you find attractive. And it's not just a guy thing to have to hold yourself back from acting on it out of respect and love for your significant other or societal pressures (which are waaaaaay more stringent on women's sexual urges than men's), or whatever other excuse you can come up with.

If any of you men think you're the only ones in your relationships that are doing that shit then you're naive.

[hpdrifter]

But oh holy god we've had the debate about men and their sexual urges on this board more times than I can count. Can we just move on without rehashing the shit again and again?

[Echewta]

whoa whoa, this thread is taking a terrible turn to the serious.

[nodanaonlyzuul]

I didn't start it.

p.s.

TITS

[Echewta]

Ok, thats more like it.

[mickill]

I have this sudden urge to rub my words against yours. All three of you. I want us all to have intercorrespondence.

[mickill]

I want to ejaculate hot replies all over this thread.

[hpdrifter]

Yabos.

[Dorothy Wood]

A friend of mine went to his friend's bachelor party last summer. It was at Medieval Times. Then they went to a country western bar and almost got kicked out because the dudes all started giving the groom strip teases.

The photos are hilarious.


Anyway, strip clubs! I think you can have more fun without them.



I wouldn't really worry about anything, but for sure let him know that you don't want him to get a lap dance.

[ToucanSpam]

Wow, great thread. I miss good conversations like this one.

I think I disagree that strip clubs aren't a big deal, they can be a huge deal at the beginning of a relationship. I remember a bunch of my friends were planning on going to one on a Friday night and they asked me to come along. I wasn't that interested to begin with, but I brought it up with my girlfriend anyway to see what her response was. Much to my surprise, SHE wanted to go and was willing to go WITHOUT me! It's only come up once since then (last fall) but I still have no interest...not sure if she does, nor am I sure that her overwhelmingly positive response was just a way of flustering me enough to not go. Anyway, long story short, I'm not interested in the whole experience. Someday maybe but I don't have the money or time to do it.

Halfway through writing this I thought of someone else's comment in this thread. I think you need to be honest and upfront about how you feel about the stripper/strip club/lapdance stuff. It may not change his decision to go, but you owe it to yourself to speak honestly and candidly about your feelings.

[Echewta]

I'm pretty sure DDD isn't replying to this thread because she is still leaning up against the closet she put her boyfriend in.

[TAL]

And when he comes out of the closet he'll only want to go to male strip clubs.

[RobMoney$]

I know his sexual history as well. Pretty positive he is telling the truth. Truth be told he's a goody two shoes.


I don't think you're being naive at all.
And I don't think your BF is lying about the way he looks at strip clubs.

Let's be honest, you're gorgeous.
You seem like a genuinely nice person too. I say that because I don't think I've ever seen you say a negative word towards anyone on here.
Believe me, there's about a 1% chance that there's going to be anyone better looking than you in the club that would be worth him looking at anyway.
Why go be harrassed by skanks for money when he's got something even better at home?

[Rodie]

"Why go out for burgers when you have steak at home?"
"You're right we should get lunch after this."

A Night at the Roxbury. Classic.

[Documad]

50? Seriously? In Antwerp they were 5 euro's (still 7 us$, unless the economy collapsed overnight, which it didn't, I checked just in case) and you got a free voucher for one with the 10 euro admission. My guess is that if we didn't get free vouchers then nobody would have gone out of their way to pay for one.

Glass of vodka was 7 euro though. Fuckers.

On the theme of Europe v. US: where I live, if the dancers are nude, you can't drink alcohol.

[mickill]

And when he comes out of the closet he'll only want to go to male strip clubs.

Haha

And wow, this thread's really brought out Rob's mean side.

Also, for the record, I don't believe it was a guy who said anyone was "naive" here.

[RobMoney$]

And I hate to shatter the little glass bubble you've seemingly allowed your boyfriend to form around whatever part of your brain it is that's supposed to detect bullshit, so apologize to him for me if this actually breaks the trance he's worked so hard to keep you in all this time

Actually Mike, I think saying she was being a little "naive" for believing her BF wasn't interested in strip clubs would have been a lot less insulting than what you said here.

Shit's kind of harsh, no?

[mickill]

If that sounded like I was being completely serious to anybody, then I apologize for it coming out that way.

[Echewta]

typical US strip club (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8JI2xBWXVg)

[Lex Diamonds]

So here's what we've learnt from this thread:

1) Rodie is a closet gay/neutered

2) nodanaonlyzuul knows as much about men as a 3 year old

3) Mikizee knows how to make people hungry via the internet

and most importantly

4) EVERYBODY IS DIFFERENT. Relationship issues can't be solved by debating on message boards, people should try actually talking about things that matter with their partners instead of nerdy strangers.


oh and
5) I'm better at life than any of you dunces

[sjp]

typical US strip club (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8JI2xBWXVg)

just watched this movie the other day very underrated

[synch]

If that sounded like I was being completely serious to anybody, then I apologize for it coming out that way.There is only one way to come out. Seriously
typical US strip club (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8JI2xBWXVg)Ha! Downloaded the "extended cut" yesterday. Not sure what it is, but I had to have it.
On the theme of Europe v. US: where I live, if the dancers are nude, you can't drink alcohol.
Which at least partially explains the price difference.

[Rodie]

So here's what we've learnt from this thread:

1) Rodie is a closet gay/neutered



Yeah I guess we can usually smell our own.

[nodanaonlyzuul]

Thanks, Rob. That was unexpected. What you said is basically what my boyfriend says which as others have commented, I would usually tend not to fully believe. But since his comments on strip clubs specifically, not how he views other women in general, I believe it.

And even if he were lying like some if you men believe, maybe because you are projecting, I don't know... I'm not too worried anyway because I'm sure it helps that 99% when he comes home, he gets some in some form. The max he has ever gone is a day or two usually because we have guests and our walls are thin. I take very good care of him.

*does the circle snap, purses her lips, flips hair, turns around, walks out of thread*

:p

[DipDipDive]

4) EVERYBODY IS DIFFERENT. Relationship issues can't be solved by debating on message boards, people should try actually talking about things that matter with their partners instead of nerdy strangers.


oh and
5) I'm better at life than any of you dunces

You're right, my usual fail-safe method of having all of my life's questions answered via the message board isn't working out this time...I'm gonna develop a coke habit and see if that helps.

[Lex Diamonds]

There is only one way to come out. Seriously.
Great, can you teach Rodie?

[cosmo105]

*does the circle snap, purses her lips, flips hair, turns around, walks out of thread*

oh man, don't forget the hurried side-to-side sashay with the heels clopping on the ground. the YOU COULDN'T AFFORD IT BABY shuffle.

[RobMoney$]

Thanks, Rob. That was unexpected. What you said is basically what my boyfriend says which as others have commented, I would usually tend not to fully believe. But since his comments on strip clubs specifically, not how he views other women in general, I believe it.

And even if he were lying like some if you men believe, maybe because you are projecting, I don't know... I'm not too worried anyway because I'm sure it helps that 99% when he comes home, he gets some in some form. The max he has ever gone is a day or two usually because we have guests and our walls are thin. I take very good care of him.

*does the circle snap, purses her lips, flips hair, turns around, walks out of thread*

:p


Most dudes don't know what it's like to have a smokin' hot chick at home who "takes very good care of them on a daily basis".
They go to strip clubs because they're bored with what they have at home.

Your BF's a very lucky man.

[ms.peachy]

They go to strip clubs because they're bored with what they have at home.


The ones who go with any regularity, maybe. I think the goes who go on occasion, like for bachelor parties or other random event just go on a bit of lark, really. I remember talking about it with mr.p once years ago and he said something about how, it's like, a situation where reality is flipped around. He can go and hang out with his buddies and drink and smoke cigars and have a laugh and there are all these hot chicks in their skimpies coming up and trying to get their attention, and they can wave them away. Whereas in reality, with these mates most of the time when they would go out to regular bars, they could hang ot and drink and smoke but wish desperately that women would even notice them, or they'd have to work up to going and talking to a girl, risking rejection and all that. So the strip club is like this weird parallel universe where as a guy you get to go be like the center of the universe, and so many women are trying to get your attention that you can actually turn them down. So it's just a bit of a laugh really; he and his mates are all smart enough to know it's not like those chicks really dig them, but it's like going out and playing paintball - it's not a real war but it's good fun pretending for a bit.

[yeahwho]

just sort of recollecting my thoughts here, I have two sisters one married the other has had a steady BF for years, I can never remember either one of them caring less if their man went to a strip club.

I've had several GF's and my current GF could care less if I go to a strip club.

How this could be an issue I'm not sure. I think real lonely guys (perhaps mentally unstable) end up in serious trouble in these bars, the overwhelming majority of guys in strip clubs are ambivalent at best about even being there. I know I am whenever I've gone.

[b i o n i c]

The ones who go with any regularity, maybe. I think the goes who go on occasion, like for bachelor parties or other random event just go on a bit of lark, really. I remember talking about it with mr.p once years ago and he said something about how, it's like, a situation where reality is flipped around. He can go and hang out with his buddies and drink and smoke cigars and have a laugh and there are all these hot chicks in their skimpies coming up and trying to get their attention, and they can wave them away. Whereas in reality, with these mates most of the time when they would go out to regular bars, they could hang ot and drink and smoke but wish desperately that women would even notice them, or they'd have to work up to going and talking to a girl, risking rejection and all that. So the strip club is like this weird parallel universe where as a guy you get to go be like the center of the universe, and so many women are trying to get your attention that you can actually turn them down. So it's just a bit of a laugh really; he and his mates are all smart enough to know it's not like those chicks really dig them, but it's like going out and playing paintball - it's not a real war but it's good fun pretending for a bit.


could be - thats quite good.. never though of it that way(y)

[Adam]

I used to like taking GFs to strip clubs in GTA, then start shooting the place up, then as I ran out throw a grenade behind me. This is a fantasy to most men and why we play them out in video games (y)

[Kid Presentable]

Yeah grenades and guns in a strip club are the best! The best, Jerry!

[b i o n i c]

my exgf got me gta just for the strippers

[Freebasser]

To be honest, GTA hasn't been the same since Vice City, when you could kill prostitutes with a screwdriver while riding around in an HGV à la the Yorkshire Ripper.

[mickill]

I like Tetris.

[ms.peachy]

Hell, I can still get excited about Pong.

[Adam]

I was just playing GTAIV and it gave me the giggles so much I had to stop.

One thing I don't like is that you can't auto-aim on the strippers, as if they are part of the back ground. Just like real strippers in real life, not real people.

[Freebasser]

Let meh just get comfehhh (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n7b9SbFzIp0)

[abcdefz]

Strip clubs just seem sad for all involved. It's just one of those things where you think, "In an ideal world, would any of us want to be doing this?"

"Hey, let's go out with my buddies and watch me pay for sexual attention!"

"Mommy, can I grow up to be a stripper?"

[Kid Presentable]

It's more like exploiting a free market.

[DipDipDive]

The ones who go with any regularity, maybe. I think the goes who go on occasion, like for bachelor parties or other random event just go on a bit of lark, really. I remember talking about it with mr.p once years ago and he said something about how, it's like, a situation where reality is flipped around. He can go and hang out with his buddies and drink and smoke cigars and have a laugh and there are all these hot chicks in their skimpies coming up and trying to get their attention, and they can wave them away. Whereas in reality, with these mates most of the time when they would go out to regular bars, they could hang ot and drink and smoke but wish desperately that women would even notice them, or they'd have to work up to going and talking to a girl, risking rejection and all that. So the strip club is like this weird parallel universe where as a guy you get to go be like the center of the universe, and so many women are trying to get your attention that you can actually turn them down. So it's just a bit of a laugh really; he and his mates are all smart enough to know it's not like those chicks really dig them, but it's like going out and playing paintball - it's not a real war but it's good fun pretending for a bit.

This makes perfect sense, and has actually eased my mind quite a bit. Boyfriend is 28 and has apparently only been to a strip club 4 or 5 times in total (which is quite astounding considering he's from Wisconsin...teehee). We're solid and I'm not threatened because I, too, take very good care of my loverman.

Turns out he and his boys aren't even going to strip club...so uh, disaster averted, I guess. :o Should he go in the future though, I'm sure he'll be respectful of my wishes.

[Adam]

Turns out he and his boys aren't even going to strip club...

After 5 pages of calling women objects and the insecurities of both the customers employees exposed for this conclusion?

I feel short changed :p

[Dorothy Wood]

"Mommy, can I grow up to be a stripper?"


my friends and I used to pretend to be strippers when I was as young as 5 or 6.

It was obviously less about sex and more about attention and being "grown up".


Strip clubs are gross, but not as gross as some of the other places that exist for people to get their rocks off.

[sjp]

2 of my cousins were strippers and i walked into one strip club and was surprised i didn't know one of them was at a strip club i frequented quite often until that day i was hugged by my cousin in her stripper clothes.

[TurdBerglar]

dig you get a boner?

[Adam]

I have never got a boner at a strip club. Really kinda pointless going - but you see boobs (y)

[jabumbo]

the only strip club i had interest in going to sadly closed its doors (http://www.roadsideamerica.com/story/15326) recently....

[lolkat]

strip clubs are gay

[Ty Webb]

strip clubs are gay
gay and expensive.

[Adam]

the only strip club i had interest in going to sadly closed its doors (http://www.roadsideamerica.com/story/15326) recently....

Oh man, takes laziness to a whole new level.

[hpdrifter]

I found out that my husband went to a strip club last week. He said it was because he was lonely. Good to know my touch can be replicated by a $30 lap dance he was too drunk to feel from a stripper with cellulite. (y)

I get to have sex now, right? Or at least let a guy roll up on me in the club?

[Yetra Flam]

Actually that reminds me of something a work acquaintance of mine mentioned recently. I don't know the whole story, but certain life circumstances meant he hadn't been in a relationship or even flirted with anyone in like a year. So he went to a strip club because he was lonely and wanted to see a beautiful woman pay attention to him.
He indicated that he was really disappointed.

[hpdrifter]

Well, the thing is, I might not give a fuck except he keeps telling me that all he does is sit at home and cry and miss me. Also, he tried to conceal it from me which, to me, indicates that he thinks there was something wrong with it.

ALSO (!), he's been alone for less than 2 months. I've been alone in this relationship for the better part of 5 fucking years.

He indicated that going made him feel even more separated from me which he didn't like. It didn't make him feel like he thought it would.

Well, at least I don't have to pay a hot dude to rub himself on me. Fuck, I was in palm springs last week and I felt like spanish fly! I went to this one bar and got hit on at various intervals by two different guys and two different girls. And one of the chicks was crazy hot (but about as drunk). Seriously, she looked like a model or actress or something. I asked one of my friends to take a picture of her because I knew no one would believe me.

California finds my pasty northwest skin irresistible. :cool:

[paul jones]

all he does is sit at home and cry and miss me.

hasn't he heard of internet porn?

[hpdrifter]

Well apparently he isn't sitting at home and crying too much.

I've seen more internet porn than he has.

[yeahwho]

California finds my pasty northwest skin irresistible. :cool:

Tanning is way over-rated. You stood out as the hot babe you are, like all the NW women.

[cookiepuss]

Well, the thing is, I might not give a fuck except he keeps telling me that all he does is sit at home and cry and miss me. Also, he tried to conceal it from me which, to me, indicates that he thinks there was something wrong with it.

ALSO (!), he's been alone for less than 2 months. I've been alone in this relationship for the better part of 5 fucking years.

He indicated that going made him feel even more separated from me which he didn't like. It didn't make him feel like he thought it would.

Well, at least I don't have to pay a hot dude to rub himself on me. Fuck, I was in palm springs last week and I felt like spanish fly! I went to this one bar and got hit on at various intervals by two different guys and two different girls. And one of the chicks was crazy hot (but about as drunk). Seriously, she looked like a model or actress or something. I asked one of my friends to take a picture of her because I knew no one would believe me.

California finds my pasty northwest skin irresistible. :cool:


wait wait, you came to CA and didn't stop to see me? Northern CA is on the waaaaaaay to Southern CA, even if you fly.

[skra75]

p.s. I'm actually insulted that you all really thought I was that dense.

I'm just suspicious that's all. guy's don't care about the whole "that chick has been up on 25 other guys in the past hour" factor. Men suspend that the minute they decide to go to the strip club. I think it must a be a power trip thing with guys, I don't understand it, but then again there is alot of stuff about being a guy that I don't get and never will.

Sorry his story/position on strip clubs sounded dubious, but no biggie just an observation.

* goes back to spinning in chair *

[nodanaonlyzuul]

I should clarify he has never gone on his own accord. Usually with his group of friends because they wanted to due to a bachelor party or something.

also,
:rolleyes:

[Rock]

guy's don't care about the whole "that chick has been up on 25 other guys in the past hour" factor.

Speak for yourself budday.

[Echewta]

Worrying about and comparing your situation to your ex isn't really a good thing, in my opinion. When I found out how my ex was "moving on" i flipped. What else was she suppose to be doing? And who was I to care how?

[Echewta]

Actually, I take some of that back. That got me out there to find a little bunny, who just kinda cowered in the corner and I had my claws...

[abbott]

I went to one for my brother-in-laws bachelor party 5 years ago, and my wife asked me to put the party together.

Before that my work colleges asked me to go, but I ended up taking my wife. Seems to have worked out so good, I would never go back without her.