i'm gonna do stand up tomorrow

[Bob]

for really reals this time, i swear to god i'm gonna do it unless something terrible happens with the open mic and they don't let me on stage

and i'm gonna do it while dressed as a mormon because it's halloween and they say you need to wear a costume or you might not get up. mormon's easy.

it's gonna happen this time, i mean it, and if it doesn't (in a way that's actually my fault) then you should all yell at me and tell me i'm a pussy because i totally will be

[yeahwho]

You have some pretty large nads doing comedy on one of the most distracting drunken nites of the year.

Or maybe it's smart, everybody is pretty self conscious so you will be kind of not too heckled.

Start out your set with a "I just fucked the shit out of a pumpkin" joke.

[Bob]

i hadn't thought about that actually

it's a monday, and people probably already partied all weekend, maybe they'll be too tired to be dicks

[The Notorious LOL]

there will be plenty of genuinely unfunny open mic performers there that will soften the blow if you happen to bomb. Just drink a few beers beforehand.

[Bob]

yeah i've been to open mics before, it's kind of reassuring to see some of the terrible ones.

i went to one once where someone told i think the most inappropriate joke i've ever heard, and i'm willing to laugh at some terrible shit, so that's a lot coming from me.

he was talking about farting in the shower, and then he goes "noxious gases in the shower? guess i know how the jews felt!" and not only did nobody laugh, but people in the audience audibly gasped and said "jesus christ!" but that didn't stop him

so as long as i don't do that i'll be fine i bet

[yeahwho]

The Nazi comedian bit is a gift, I could try and always be there ahead of you during these open mic nights and I'll tell holocaust/racist jokes while you clean up with the sex jokes.

We'll split the take like poker hustlers sandbaggin' the joint.

[Bob]

ha. maybe my whole set could just be jokes about shitty comedians' jokes

[checkyourprez]

yeah i've been to open mics before, it's kind of reassuring to see some of the terrible ones.

i went to one once where someone told i think the most inappropriate joke i've ever heard, and i'm willing to laugh at some terrible shit, so that's a lot coming from me.

he was talking about farting in the shower, and then he goes "noxious gases in the shower? guess i know how the jews felt!" and not only did nobody laugh, but people in the audience audibly gasped and said "jesus christ!" but that didn't stop him

so as long as i don't do that i'll be fine i bet


that got a little laugh out of me.

[NicRN77]

Good luck, Bob!

[abbott]

for really reals this time, i swear to god i'm gonna do it unless something terrible happens with the open mic and they don't let me on stage

and i'm gonna do it while dressed as a mormon because it's halloween and they say you need to wear a costume or you might not get up. mormon's easy.

it's gonna happen this time, i mean it, and if it doesn't (in a way that's actually my fault) then you should all yell at me and tell me i'm a pussy because i totally will be

What's mormon?

are you going to dress up like a book? the book of mormon?

I know a group of people, the LDS, Later Day Saint, that read and study the book of mormon but I was taught only people that are ignorant refer to a person as mormon, all though LDS are often ignorant about that themselves. Calling a person a mormon to me is like calling a christian a bible, but I'm old school. I never converted to LDS, but I have much love for them and went through intence LDS training as they were my largest paying customer for years.


oh yea, hope you kill it.

[Lex Diamonds]

So you sell crack right?

[KingPsyz]

for really reals this time, i swear to god i'm gonna do it unless something terrible happens with the open mic and they don't let me on stage

and i'm gonna do it while dressed as a mormon because it's halloween and they say you need to wear a costume or you might not get up. mormon's easy.

it's gonna happen this time, i mean it, and if it doesn't (in a way that's actually my fault) then you should all yell at me and tell me i'm a pussy because i totally will be

Are you going to wear a bike helmet?

[yeahwho]

So you sell crack right?

Bob doesn't just sell "crack", he sells Mormon crack.

[Lex Diamonds]

Bob doesn't just sell "crack", he sells Mormon crack.
Cool story bro. I wasn't talking to Bob though.

[Bob]

so i did it

can't believe i waited til i was 27 to do this

i'm having a hard time putting my feelings into words right now because i'm a little drunk

but stand-up is something i've wanted to do since i was a zitty teenager that discovered bill hicks for the first time and now that i've done it i can't believe it took me this long for me to try it

it was an open mic, i signed up as a proper stranger, and i accidentally tried to get on stage one slot before i was supposed to (i swear to god they changed the order after i signed my name on the list), but even then i won the hosts over.

after i got off, they were like "is he new?" and i was all "yep, that was my first show" and they were like "wow". then after the show was over completely, the main host guy came up to me out of costume and was like "hey, you did great, normally when names i don't recognize come on stage i cringe, but you should come back", i promise that on like three separate occasions the hosts told me i should come back next week, i have witnesses

i don't ever want to stop doing this, this may or may not be day zero, what a fucking night

can't believe it's a monday

[Bob]

apparently there's a video. i don't have it yet, but if it's good and i'm drunk enough maybe i'll post it or something

no promises, nobody likes to be taped their first time

[Bob]

the host of the show literally just friended me unsolicited on facebook, even though i've never met him before (i saw him on stage once, but he wouldn't remember me from that)

that has to be a good sign, right?

the fuck have i been doing with my life until now

[ToucanSpam]

Congrats. Maybe one day you'll have yourself a success story like Chris Rock. One night at the club he was working at, Eddie Murphy stopped by and convinced the club's owner to let Rock onstage. Chris Rock made Eddie Murphy laugh that night, and the rest is history.

[KingPsyz]

Dude, I am really happy for you.

I feel like a hipster now...

Yeah I've known about Bob since 2001... pfft.
:cool:

[NicRN77]

yahoo!!! let me know when you're doing stand up (or improv) again. would love to come out and see you! (or would that make you all nervous?)

[Guy Incognito]

no promises, nobody likes to be taped their first time

i bet you say that to all the girls:D

well done bob, sounds like it went really well. really pleased for yer Keep workin at it(y)

[mikizee]

I have seen the video. Not enough didja ever notice's and too many amirite?s

I actually haven't seen the video but my statement still stands

In all seriousness, I can probably get you booked for the Adelaide Fringe Festival next March. Its only the 2nd biggest fringe festival in the world after Edinburgh.

Every comic and his bloody dog from around the world are here in Adelaide in March. Well, it seems like it anyway

Oh yeah and well done

[checkyourprez]

apparently there's a video. i don't have it yet, but if it's good and i'm drunk enough maybe i'll post it or something

no promises, nobody likes to be taped their first time

i make sure i tape them all on their first times. ;)

[Bob]

I have seen the video. Not enough didja ever notice's and too many amirite?s

I actually haven't seen the video but my statement still stands

In all seriousness, I can probably get you booked for the Adelaide Fringe Festival next March. Its only the 2nd biggest fringe festival in the world after Edinburgh.

Every comic and his bloody dog from around the world are here in Adelaide in March. Well, it seems like it anyway

Oh yeah and well done

i think i did accidentally let out an "amirite" once. like i caught myself doing it as i was doing it and internally i was all "noooooo" but it happened anyway

i will get back to you about adelaide, that seems a little advanced right now, but anything could happen by march!

[DandyFop]

Fuck yeah dude! I'm glad you went for it. Welcome to the rabbit hole....

[Bob]

i did it again tonight and it was...not that good, I thought. i was way more nervous than i was the first time, oddly enough. i brought a bunch of friends again and the host remembered me and kind of called me out on it—in what sounded like a genuinely grateful way, to be fair, because what monday night open mic host doesn't appreciate having an audience of people other than comedians? but it still made me a little self conscious and psyched me out a little

he even gave me extra time in gratitude for bringing an audience, which should have been totally awesome, but it ironically psyched me out even more because i kind of only practiced a 2 minute set. but i felt obliged to use the extra time, so i just brought up my notebook and kind of awkwardly read from it, which didn't help

also i'm getting over a cold and forgot to blow my nose before i got on stage so my voice sounded weird in my head and i think i sniffed into the mic a bunch of times

still. these things happen, i'll get better at it

i still got some decent laughs that i was happy with, and i still don't think i was the worst person who got up there, so that's the victory that i'm going to have to take, i suppose.

i can also tell that i have good friends because they totally didn't laugh at my jokes that sucked (either because i wrote them shittily or delivered them awkwardly, i'll figure that out with experience i guess), and i appreciate that more than i think i could ever tell them (partially because if i did, i'd sound like i was sarcastically insulting them). the last thing i need this early on is thinking that i'm funny when i'm not.


so that happened, i suppose i'm happy it happened this soon. better than at my first show, certainly

[Whatitis]

Don't ever get discouraged. Every gig will not or feel not the same.

[Bob]

nah i'm fine, i'm gonna do it again. it's only my second time, i figure nobody's great right away. like sex, which i also hope to be good at some day

i'm a nervous guy in general so it'll be a learning curve for me for sure, i just gotta keep doing it as much as i can. comedy i mean, not...well both i guess

i just wish i'd started sooner than 27

[Randetica]

better too late than too never


bob owns (y)

[NicRN77]

Bob, you were great! And I'm not just saying that. You were way better than that guitar playing dude. ;) still laughing at your jellyfish joke. (y)

[Guy Incognito]

1) tell us the jellyfish joke
2) this is definitely a good thing you are doing
3) i doubt anyone has not had a below par gig
4) you only done two gigs and you are still encouraged to carry on
5) keep at it bruv
6) I have no idea why i did a list

[checkyourprez]

bob do you tell any fart jokes in your routines?

[Kid Presentable]

Bob you can use 'de ja poo' if you want. No need to thank me.

[Helvete]

I did some stand up this evening, my game is lacking quite a lot and I got hit a good few times. My ground work was a lot better though and those same guys were easy prey to take down and submit.

[yeahwho]

Just bought a couple of tickets to see Norm Macdonald here in town next month. He is one of those guys that can make a room turn funny just by being there.

His latest twitter; Seems like I've been on the road now for a pickler's fortnight.

Can a stand up comedian make a decent living out there? I have seen a few guys in the clubs around here in Seattle who just crack me up, but I always think their mom is outside waiting to drive them back home.

[cj hood]

i'm doing standup in 2 hours with bob levy.

[abbott]

i'm doing standup in 2 hours with bob levy.

wish i could make it

[Bob]

Just bought a couple of tickets to see Norm Macdonald here in town next month. He is one of those guys that can make a room turn funny just by being there.

His latest twitter; Seems like I've been on the road now for a pickler's fortnight.

Can a stand up comedian make a decent living out there? I have seen a few guys in the clubs around here in Seattle who just crack me up, but I always think their mom is outside waiting to drive them back home.

i like norm macdonald too (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GWJC7tlYck)

i'm hardly an expert on the boston comedy scene or anything, but it seems like the overwhelming majority of them have day jobs. as far as i can tell, "making it" in boston means you move to LA to have a paying career

[yeahwho]

You got me thinking about a few years ago I was in Las Vegas and went to a comedy club @ the Tropicana where I saw 3 comedians, the funniest one was from Boston. I didn't want to go that night but I was with 3 coworkers and the tickets were already purchased so I said fuck it and went begrudgingly.

My plan was to gamble, smoke cigars and have as many awkward conversations with females as possible. Comedy was out.

So 4 of us dudes from where I work show up at the Tropicana (I'm the only one who doesn't drink) for the 10:30 PM show and just for kicks as a way to protest I tell the guys there is no way I'm going to laugh. My buddies are all drunked up and we all have those casino beads around our necks and somehow the place is packed and they sit us up front.

The MC is out and he's funnier than fuck. I'm still not laughing even though it's tough, this guy is hilarious. Then he spots us 4 dorks down in front and goes down the line ripping each of us.... Then he gets to me and I'm still not laughing on the outside, I'm keeping a straight face with my arms crossed. My buddies are laughing their asses off, the crowd is laughing their asses off and this MC and I are just glaring at each other for about 10 seconds and he just blurts out, Theres always one "obligatory pissed off guy", the delivery was awesome I lost it and the rest of the night I laughed so hard I could hardly fucking think straight.

The above story isn't even why I replied. Fuck. I was replying because I was trying to remember the name of that Boston comedian, I googled him and it was Lenny Clarke, he wasn't the headliner but his 20 minute set was the funniest, mainly because of his whole hard boiled Boston attitude during the set, perfect for Vegas. He singled me out a couple of times, because now I'm laughing my ass off... He was giving some young guy shit about his prostate then talking about his old fucked up prostate and I'm the only one laughing so Lenny zeroes in on me in a Boston like split second and says, Hey some of these aren't jokes OK? I've got some serious medical problems OK?

Hey anyway, the above story isn't why I replied either. I was thinking that those guys probably get comped a room, meals and maybe make a few thousand bucks for bringing in customers to the Casino that night. I was jealous of their job for sure. It would be a great way to make a living, either stand up or writing comedy.

Good Luck.

[yeahwho]

iPad sucks, double post

[yeahwho]

Arrgh

[Yeti]

Congrats Bob and all of our BBMB comics. I have listened to some of CJ Hoods' stand-up and he is a salty fella. Ha! You all have guts to put yourselves out there(y)