How would you go about revoking someone's membership to something?

[Dorothy Wood]

I resigned from heading a [cat breeding] organization recently, but am still involved somewhat. Anyway, there's this chick in there (that I've complained about previously) who no one likes at all. And, she keeps missing meetings, is frequently gone for a couple of months at a time, then shows up when it's time to be in the public eye after not having contributed.

she's been told that her attendance needs to be better in an effort to encourage her to quit (because she's busy and can't attend regularly), but actually people like it when she's not there because when she is there, she's bossy and disruptive.

but can you really kick someone out of something just because people don't like her personality?

I think it's going down soon, but I have no part in it because I resigned. Other than shit-talking to my close pals and on here. I can't really imagine what you could say that wouldn't be rude or upsetting....it's like firing someone I guess.

[TurdBerglar]

ummm don't open the door for her?

[MC Moot]

I used to come across similar scenarios when working as a volunteer co-ordinator...usually,when someone consistently failed to meet commitments over a period of time,I would just make a gentle phone call and in a round about way suggest that perhaps they had taken on something they were incapable of fully contributing to or if the fit was wrong...it was a fine line to walk as after all they are volunteers...however 9 for 10 times the suggestion that they should perhaps reconsider or evaluate their participation would lead to an amicable parting or reassignment of efforts...but cat people are often a little crazy by default...what kind of cats are we talking about here?...I hope it's not those inbred flat face types...cause that's just wrong...maybe you just send her this (http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x265/mcmoot/fired.jpg)...you can't play in the game if you don't make practice...

[Dorothy Wood]

hee hee, business cat.

oh, I was lying about the organization being about cats. I would like to keep it private...but maybe a cat breeding org is not the best comparison. Let's say it was a softball league, I "coached" a "softball team", and one of the "players" is a jerk. ha.

yeah, she was told that she couldn't play the game before last because of her low attendance to practice. and she missed the next game because she had to work, but she also missed the practice before that game because she was like, "oh, I'm skipping practice because I won't be playing in the game"...instead of going to practice to fulfill her duties as a member of the team.

So, she was told that that was a kind of shitty thing to do, her loyalty to the team came into question. But she then still missed the next practice, but texted the new coach that she was "really sorry she couldn't make it" and that she promises to be at the next practice.

basically, she's not giving up her membership even though she's been gently scolded and even banned from one of the games. Other teammates would really like her gone, but because there aren't technically any attendance rules, it's hard to kick her out based on that. So, no matter what, the main reason people want her out has to do with the simple idea that she's unlikable. and I wonder if that's even a fair reason to kick someone off a team?

[kaiser soze]

just punch her in the boobie

[Dorothy Wood]

see, there's no answer! Someone's gonna email her like, "Hey, nobody likes you, sorry bye". It just seems so rude to me, even though I agree she should leave.


I'm glad I don't have to be in charge of it.

[yeahwho]

And, she keeps missing meetings, is frequently gone for a couple of months at a time, then shows up when it's time to be in the public eye after not having contributed.





I hate people who do that shit, it happens everywhere.




Off to the side, one on one somebody who really cares about the organization and those who are contributing needs to talk to her.

Tell her this isn't a "Show's Only Club" the real heart of the organization is the unseen work, which she is not involved in. She needs to decide if she is willing to contribute on a level that seems to be beneath her, because currently her style is disruptive and upsetting to all.

[checkyourprez]

i say "look bitch, you're out."

[Helvete]

"You're fucking out, I'm fucking in"

Wait, so this is nothing to do with cats? Is it some kind of weird crazy sex club? Are you a swinger?

[ms.peachy]

Wait, so this is nothing to do with cats? Is it some kind of weird crazy sex club? Are you a swinger?

Well that would certainly put an interesting slant to the "only turns up when its in the public eye" comment.

Ooh, I know, I bet they're doggers. She thought she could throw us off with the 'cat' thing. But it's dogging, isn't it.

[MC Moot]

What's wild is that D.W has been actually able to field a team of felines that can play in the first place...props for that...oh and also that she lives in climate that affords year long baseball...

[Dorothy Wood]

I hate people who do that shit, it happens everywhere.




Off to the side, one on one somebody who really cares about the organization and those who are contributing needs to talk to her.

Tell her this isn't a "Show's Only Club" the real heart of the organization is the unseen work, which she is not involved in. She needs to decide if she is willing to contribute on a level that seems to be beneath her, because currently her style is disruptive and upsetting to all.

Very wise, thank you. I feel like this has been alluded to in emails to her, but never said outright in person.

Shit was supposed to go down yesterday, but didn't. I guess the messenger got cold feet or was busy with more important things.

[Guy Incognito]

what yeahwho said, someone have a quiet word and if that doesnt work i'd suggest going down the "no homers club" route.

[Dorothy Wood]

Update! (not that anyone cares)

Well, she got fired via email. She was flabbergasted. Her one friend on the team was mad, but then understanding. Other people who were not in on it are confused and saying words like, "weird" and "conspiracy".

oops.

but, a team is not a democracy. sometimes the majority of people have bad ideas. 7 dedicated members wanted her gone.

I think the main problem is that she was dismissed under the idea that her attendance was poor...but I think she was really dismissed because of her actions when she did attend. and I wonder if actually telling her specific reasons would be better. but how do you delicately tell someone that he or she is a stuck up bitch?


drama!

(sorry, I have to type this somewhere, as I'm not technically involved and it would be extra conspiratorial for me to comment IRL)

...first world problems...

[Helvete]

Okay now tell us about sex club.

[KingPsyz]

So you're in roller derby? It's cool, I know lots of people who play. No need for embarassment, although I suppose you didn't want certain peeps with financially enclined monkiers googlesing for pics of you in hot pants, so whoops.


Oh and hi guis...

[Helvete]

Hello, Justin.

[Dorothy Wood]

Yeah, that's it, coed roller derby team, I used to coach a roller derby team...sure.

[KingPsyz]

Now I get it... it was like cock fighting, except you guys put cats in roller skates...