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-   -   Genius Thread II (http://bbs.beastieboys.com/showthread.php?t=22)

mate_spawn_die 05-21-2009 08:05 PM

Re: Genius Thread II
 

A. Chimendez 05-21-2009 08:42 PM

Re: Genius Thread II
 


Quote:

Product Description
Annie Parks came to Hawaii to settle a score, not spend time handcuffed to a sexy stranger's bed - even if said stranger saved her from drowning after she was pitched overboard by some goons. Looking at six feet of hard, Hawaiian muscle and gorgeous cool that's making forgotten parts of her say, 'Aloha!', Annie needs to stay focused. But a side dish of Kane Travers is awfully tempting. Kauai Police Chief Kane Travers is not a holiday kind of guy. So it figures that when Internal Affairs suspended him, he'd end up rescuing a sarcastic, dishonest, extremely hot redhead who is clearly hiding something. Kane's got half a mind to give miss whoever she is something she'll never forget, even if his cop senses tell him she needs his protection. But how can he get her to tell him anything when his mouth won't stop covering hers?

paul jones 05-21-2009 09:26 PM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by mate_spawn_die (Post 1669715)

Now here's a mentally stable family for you

TurdBerglar 05-21-2009 09:34 PM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
look how happy that baby is!

paul jones 05-21-2009 09:44 PM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by TurdBerglar (Post 1669730)
look how happy that baby is!

a future president

Echewta 05-22-2009 12:16 AM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
I never understood backdrops like that.

kaiser soze 05-22-2009 12:34 AM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
Learn more about it here (read the reviews)

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00...=cm_sw_r_fa_dp

Quote:

Originally Posted by overlook1977
Unfortunately I already had this exact picture tattooed on my chest, but this shirt is very useful in colder weather.


Bob 05-22-2009 12:55 AM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by kaiser soze (Post 1669764)
Learn more about it here (read the reviews)

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00...=cm_sw_r_fa_dp

How to Live with a Huge Penis: Advice, Meditations, and Wisdom for Men Who Have Too Much (Paperback)

Matt 05-22-2009 03:23 AM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by kaiser soze (Post 1669764)
Learn more about it here (read the reviews)

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00...=cm_sw_r_fa_dp

Customers Who Viewed This Item Also Viewed
  • Zubaz Pants
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  • Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz
  • TKO Extreme Training Push -up Bars

Matt 05-22-2009 03:29 AM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
Actually, the Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz page deserves to be in this thread. The reviews are stellar!

b-grrrlie 05-22-2009 09:18 AM

Re: Genius Thread II
 





Tomtomtom 05-23-2009 08:04 AM

Re: Genius Thread II
 

paul jones 05-23-2009 08:30 AM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Tomtomtom (Post 1669987)

pffft that's weak(n) he'll never beat my record

Audio. 05-23-2009 08:37 AM

Re: Genius Thread II
 

Bob 05-23-2009 04:43 PM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Matt (Post 1669779)
Actually, the Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz page deserves to be in this thread. The reviews are stellar!

lol

Quote:

He always brought home milk on Friday.

After a long hard week full of days he would burst through the door, his fatigue hidden behind a smile. There was an icy jug of Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz in his right hand. With his left hand he would grip my waist - I was always cooking dinner - and press the cold frostiness of the jug against my arm as he kissed my cheek. I would jump, mostly to gratify him after a time, and smile lovingly at him. He was a good man, a wonderful husband who always brought the milk on Friday, Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz.

Then there was that Friday, the terrible Friday that would ruin every Friday for the rest of my life. The door opened, but there was no bouyant greeting - no cold jug against the back of my arm. There was no Tuscan Whole Milk in his right hand, nor his left. There came no kiss. I watched as he sat down in a kitchen chair to remove his shoes. He wore no fatigue, but also no smile. I didn't speak, but turned back to the beans I had been stirring. I stirred until most of their little shrivelled skins floated to the surface of the cloudy water. Something was wrong, but it was vague wrongness that no amount of hard thought could give shape to.

Over dinner that night I casually inserted,"What happened to the milk?"
"Oh,"he smiled sheepishly, glancing aside,"I guess I forgot today."

That was when I knew. He was tired of this life with me, tired of bringing home the Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz. He was probably shoveling funds into a secret bank account, looking at apartments in town, casting furtive glances at cashiers and secretaries and waitresses. That's when I knew it was over. Some time later he moved in with a cashier from the Food Mart down the street. And me? Well, I've gone soy.

TurdBerglar 05-24-2009 02:05 PM

Re: Genius Thread II
 

Whatitis 05-26-2009 06:46 PM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
http://www.sleeveface.com/


Matt 05-27-2009 06:19 AM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
Disgusted by Tuscan's Exploitation of their Workers, May 23, 2009
By S. J. Steimer - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)
September 21, 1957:

Daddy laid in bed. Broken and debilitated, less than half the man I knew just ten years before, and probably only a fraction of the man that Mama remembered. The pain drove him sick; it ate away at his psyche. His nights were sleepless and agonizing; hallucinations brought on by both the pain and the medication haunted him. My brothers and myself were constantly awakened by his verbalized fits of rage and pain. A week ago we heard him screaming about Death, but not death as in the natural end to one's life, but as a personification of something much more, much worse, and much more complicated than any of us could possibly understand. We couldn't make out the specifics of what he was saying but he went on for twenty minutes or so, screaming and cursing until his voice gave out and usurped him into an exhausted slumber. The next morning we gave him his 500mg of Tuscan brand morphine, the only thing in the world that seemed to benefit him at all, even if their affects were not long lasting. We asked him about his terrors and he became lucid. "Death," he said tiredly, nudging his feeble head -- which was too big for his shoulders and neck to bear -- towards the corner of the room. "I can see him there, just sitting there." He went on to describe Death to us. "He's a man," he said somberly. "He's a man with no face, no emotion." He said he was draped in black, and he was there now. He described it as being omniscient, but only he, so close to the end, could now visualize it. Death didn't laugh at him nor threaten him or even speak to him. It merely existed. That was all it took to elicit such a hopeless rage. A day later Daddy would be dead.


For forty years he spent in those Tuscan milk mines, breaking his back to put food on our table and a roof over our heads. You'll never hear his name mentioned by any scholar when speaking about the great Tuscan Milk Rush of 1947 and 1948 nor will you ever read about his exploits in any dime store pulp biographies. My father was just a pawn of the system: the Rockefellars and others like them. He never became wealthy, never became famous, never inherited a yacht or became the owner of artificial flower mills all across northen California. He was just a laborer, one of thousands that was used and exploited in those Tuscan death-holes. For fourteen hours a day, seven days a week, he spent his life underground in cramped little pockets mining the veins of Earth for Grade A whole milk, droplets at a time. Some considered him lucky as he was one of the few who did not parish in those chambers, but if they knew what I know and saw what I saw of those last torturous years of his life I do not think those people would look upon him with envy.

My brothers and I would sometimes venture into town and take great gaze at Nathaniel J.W. Tuscan's mansion and pasta salad bar, which sat perched on the top of Milk Mountain, the highest pique in the city. It sat there, defying all moral ehtos, almost laughing at us. It was as if someone had erected a 700 foot tall middle finger and doused it with fluorescent paint. My father had none of this, not even a millionth of a fraction of it. He died poor and hungry and in pain. He died in the smallest room of our three bedroom toolshed, living his last years almost no different than the conditions he spent his life wallowing in.

Tuscan and the Rockefellars still live up there on Milk Mountain. They still exploit their workers, forcing them work in the most dire conditions and still pay them with Snackwell coupons while they simply get rich, selling their Tuscan Whole Milk for over $77.00 a gallon, enough to purchase a fleet of naval jets in this year we live of nineteen hundred and fifty-seven.

I'd say don't ever buy from them, don't ever touch their Tuscan whole milk, don't ever support such evils... But I can't say it, at least not fully. Their milk is the best I have ever chewed.

rirv 05-28-2009 05:23 AM

Re: Genius Thread II
 

funk63 05-28-2009 09:06 AM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
Perv...:cool:

Echewta 05-28-2009 11:09 AM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
Holy Winding Road in the Swiss Alps!

TurdBerglar 05-28-2009 02:24 PM

Re: Genius Thread II
 

YoungRemy 05-28-2009 02:30 PM

Re: Genius Thread II
 

HEIRESS 05-28-2009 04:59 PM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Whatitis (Post 1670506)

I'm addicted!

Tomtomtom 05-30-2009 08:13 PM

Re: Genius Thread II
 

NoLayupRule 05-31-2009 06:02 PM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
Ownage!

b-grrrlie 06-02-2009 02:48 PM

Re: Genius Thread II
 


The coolest ever!!!

saz 06-02-2009 04:47 PM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
where all the bad guys died in die hard, except for theo and kristoff who got knocked out.


Caribou 06-04-2009 06:48 AM

Re: Genius Thread II
 


Seriously, wtf.

b i o n i c 06-04-2009 10:21 AM

Re: Genius Thread II
 
^ ^ hahah! ^ ^


Quote:

Originally Posted by rirv (Post 1670826)

holy shit!


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