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#1
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If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
Poor Canada. Canada is like Minnesota, but more boring. Culturally indistinct from America (except for the Quebecois, of course), Canada sits safe between two oceans and behind the might of America, sneering at her superior neighbor. America strides the world like a Colossus. Canada watches it pass by like a speedbump. Poor Canada. America has given the world rock and roll, jazz, hip hop, and the blues. Canada has given the world... nothing. America has produced Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin, Teddy Roosevelt, FDR, General Dwight D Eisenhower, MacArthur, Patton, and Kennedy. Canada has produced... no one. America has given the world the telephone, the telegraph, the phonograph, the electric light bulb, the airplane, the liquid fueled rocket, the personal computer, the birth control pill. Canada has given the world... nothing. America landed on the moon. Canada landed in Saskatchewan. Poor Canada. We don't begrudge you your bitter jealousy - we realized it is firmly based in the solid granite foundation of irrelevence and unimportance that is the hallmark of your nation.
Poor Canada.
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#2
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
Wow, something got you all riled up alright.
If Canada is so culturally indistinct, and such a bad place to live, why can we smoke what we like, marry who we please, and get our health taken care of for free, while you can't do any of those things? Tell you the truth, I'd much rather live in boring old Canada than be loathed by the rest of the world as a symbol of greed and omnipotent incompetence. You talk about irrelevance and unimportance like they're bad things, but it wasn't three thousand Canadians who died on September 11th and it's not Canadian troops being sent to die in useless wars. You keep your relevance and importance, by all means, and we'll keep our bland, unimportant society - infinitely more peaceable, progressive, liberated, and forward-looking than your own.
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#3
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
I think a lot of people would notice if Canada disappeared. It's pretty big.
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#4
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
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#5
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Last edited by Schmeltz : 12-08-2004 at 11:33 PM. |
#6
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
Paul Nice and any other Americans should try coming to Fort Erie Canada for the Friendship Festival during the week of Canada Day & the 4th of July,
It is a HUGE party in the park right beside the Peace Bridge that connects Fort Erie Canada to Buffalo New York. It is a celebration of the two best fuckin countries on earth, and all of its people. the event is FREE, they have FREE concerts, Lots of beer and things that explode. and the best part is that you never knbow who you are talking to when you are there, you can learn alot about the people of both countries and if you have a beef with a certain country when you get there, then iam sure you will have a more positive outlook on that country by the time you leave there. Check out the website: http://www.friendshipfestival.com
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#7
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yep, i'm nitpicking
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that said, your comments on smoking what you like aren't entirely true. my boyfriend just told me a story about how a 70 or 80 year old woman got busted for weed in canada. as for the u.s., it is up to each individual state. i don't know the drug laws of each state, but i do know for a fact that possession of a small amount of weed in alaska is legal (my friend went there last summer on an internship, and that's what she was told by criminal defense attorneys). also, some states allow people to marry who they please, but the federal government will not recognize those marriages and will not allow other states to recognize those marriages should the couple move to a different state. i don't know canada's policy on such marriages; is it all of canada, or just where you live? |
#9
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
Yes yes. You know, I got busted smoking down a couple of weeks ago and nothing came of it - didn't even get my pipe confiscated. Right now the laws are so vague that the cops might bust you or they might not, but they're getting more and more lenient. Decriminalization of up to 15 grams, if not outright legalization, is just around the corner. If you ask Deaf, I'm sure he'll tell you that Canadians in general have a much more relaxed attitude toward weed than Americans do in general. Thank God.
I think 11 of 13 Canadian provinces/territories now recognize gay marriages, and soon it will be the whole country. My province just legalized the procedure a few weeks ago, round about the same time one-fifth of the USA decided that private relationships are public business. I tell you, nobody in Canada would ever take seriously the notion of introducing to the Charter of Rights or Constitution an amendment banning gay marriage. Well, maybe some of the Albertans. Alaska sounds like a nice place to visit.
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#10
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
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First of all, shut your hole dipshit. Canada created Peacekeeping, Canada produced Edgar Graham Bell (ahh, we wouldn't be using computers if it wasn't for him ). We also produced the first supersonic jet. We created hockey, we created basketball, plus we have way better beer than you do. By the way we never say we're "poor" because we don't whine like some Americans. Unlike America we don't go and hide because of some terrorists. Which, by the way, your country created . You know what go ahead and diss Canada because you know shit about it. Stay down there and do not come up here, we don't want you. I LOVE CANADA and damn proud to be a Canadian!! So fuck you!! PLUS: Our country sent money to help the 9/11 victim's families. Our country sent firefighters and police officers to help out. I happen to know not all Americans feel the way you do about us, you're just the ignorant, arrogant example of America. Last edited by CSAR : 12-01-2004 at 12:38 AM. |
#11
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
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Ohhhhhh, that's not funny.
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#12
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
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Yay, go us. We've given the world the blues, while we're stuck with red. |
#13
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
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#14
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
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#15
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
What is this lame crap?
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#16
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
Aw sheeit dogg, iss my homepiece Paul Niggity Nice flip-wiggin' on why Cizanada gots to be stone cold frontin, y'all. He ain't had a syllable of that shit, yo: nigga got to lay down whass on his mind and strong-arm some of that bbmb, awwwww yeah.
*Note: I am using Paul Nice's lexicon in an effort to bridge the vast cultural gap between us.
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#17
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
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God bless good ol' fashion US capitalism! |
#18
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
Iam A PROUD Canadian!
But i just figured that i would list a few Canadian Inventions and i bet Paul Nice, uses a few of these Canadian USEFUL inventions: acrylics (Plexiglas/Perspex/Lucite) - William Chalmers Actar 911 CPR Dummy - Dianne Croteau, Richard Brault and Jonathan Vinden air-conditioned railway coach - Henry Ruttan (1858) antigravity suit - Wilbur R. Franks (1940) Balderdash - Laura Robinson and Paul Toyne (1984) basketball - James Naismith (1892) batteryless radio (AC radio tube) - Edward Samuel Rogers Sr. (1925) bovril butter substitute Canadarm - SPAR and the National Aeronautical Establishment (1981) calcium carbide and acetylene gas (production of) - Thomas L. "Carbide" Wilson (1892) carcino embryonic antigen (CEA) blood test - Dr. Phil Gold (1968) cardiac intensive care unit (first) cobalt bomb - University of Saskatchewan and Eldorado Mining and Refining (1951) compound marine engine - Benjamin Franklin Tibbets compound revolving snow shovel (trains) computerized braille crash position indicator (C.P.I) - Harry T. Stevinson and David M. Makow (1959) dental mirror disintegrating plastic ear piercer electric cooking range - Thomas Ahearn (1882) electric hand prosthesis for children - Helmut Lukas (1971) electrical car electric wheelchair - George J. Klein electron microscope - Prof. E. F. Burton and Cecil Hall, James Hillier and Albert Prebus (late 1930s) electronic wave organ - Frank Morse Robb (1927) explosives vapour detector - Dr Lorne Elias (1990) fathometer - Reginald Fessenden film developing tank five pin bowling - Thomas E. Ryan (1909) foghorn - Robert Foulis (1854) frozen fish - Dr. Archibald G. Huntsman (1926) garbage bag (green plastic) - Harry Wasyluk and Larry Hanson (1950s) Gestalt Photo Mapper - G. Hobrough (1975) gingerale - John J. McLaughlin (1904) goalie mask - Jacques Plante (1959) Green ink - Thomas Sterry Hunt (1862) hair tonic heart valve operation helicopter trap (for landing on ships) helium as a substitute for hydrogen in airships Hockey hydrofoil boat - Alexander Graham Bell and Casey Baldwin (1908) IMAX - Grahame Ferguson, Roman Kroitor, Robert Kerr (1968) instant potato flakes - Dr. Edward Asselbegs and the Food Research Institute (1962) insulation insulin (as diabetes treatment) - Dr. Frederick Banting, Dr. Charles Best and Dr. Collip (1921) Java - James Gosling Jetline jolly jumper - Olivia Poole kerosene - Abraham Gesner (1840) lacrosse - played since the 1600s; William George Beers set out standard rules (1860) laser (sailboat) - Bruce Kirby, Ian Bruce and Hans Fogh (1969) lightbulb- Henry Woodward (1874) machine gun tracer bullet MacPherson gas mask measure for footwear Muskol Newtsuit - Phil Nuytten news print - Charles Fenerty (1838) Nursing Mother Breast Pads - Marsha Skrypuch (1986) pablum - Drs. Alan Brown, Fred Tisdall, and Theo Drake (1930s) pacemaker - Wilfred Bigelow paint roller - Norman Breakey (1940) panoramic camera - John Connon (1887) Phi (position homing indicator for aircraft) Pictionary - Rob Angel (1986) pizza pizza telephone computer delivery services portable high chair Puzz-3D (A) Question of Scruples - Robert Simpson (1984) radar profile recorder - NRC (1947) radio compass retractable beer carton handle (Tuck-away-handle Beer Carton) - Steve Pasjac (1957) rollerskate screw propeller ski-binding snowblower - Arthur Sicard (1927) snowmobile - Joseph-Armand Bombardier (1937) snowplow (rotary) - invented by J.W. Elliot (1869), first built by Leslie Brothers (1883) steam foghorn standard time - Sir Sanford Fleming (1879) Stanley Cup - (Canada's Governor-General) Lord Stanley of Preston (1893) Stol aircraft - de Havilland Canada (1948) submarine telegraph cable Superman - Joe Shuster and Jerome Siegel (1938) table hockey - Donald Munro (1930s) telephone - Alexander Graham Bell (1874) Trivial Pursuit - Chris Haney, John Haney and Scott Abbott (1982) variable Pitch Propeller - Wallace Rupert Turnbull (1918) Walkie-Talkie - Donald L. Hings (1942) washing machine wirephoto - Sir William Stephenson (1921) Yachtzee zipper - Gideon Sundback (1913)
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#19
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
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#20
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
Here is some Canadian actors.
Aykroyd, Dan: Comedian, Actor. "Saturday Night Live", "The Blues Brothers" Bain, Conrad: Actor. "Diff'rent Strokes", "Maude". Bairstow, Scott: Actor. "Lonesome Dove: The Series" Bluteau, Lothaire : Actor. "Jesus of Montreal", "Black Robe" Bochner, Lloyd: Actor. "Dynasty", "Naked Gun 2 1/2: The Smell of Fear" Burr, Raymond: Actor. "Perry Mason", "Ironside" Candy, John: Comedian, Actor. "SCTV" Carrey, Jim: Comedian, Actor. "The Mask", "Ace Ventura: Pet Detective", "The Truman Show" Carson, Jack: Actor. "Mildred Pierce", "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof" Chaykin, Maury: Actor. "Dances with Wolves", "Whale Music", "Buried on Sunday" Chong, Thomas: Comedian, Actor. Half of Cheech and Chong Colicos, John: Actor. "Anne of a Thousand Days", "The Postman Always Rings Twice", played the first Klingon on "Star Trek", "Battlestar Galactica" Cronyn, Hume: Actor. "Shadow of a Doubt", "Sunrise at Campobello", "Cocoon" Doohan, James: Actor. Scotty on "Star Trek" Elliott, David James: Actor. "Melrose Place", "JAG" Foley, David: Comedian, Actor. "Kids in the Hall", "News Radio" Ford, Glenn: Actor. "Gilda", "The Big Heat", "The Blackboard Jungle". Fox, Michael J.: Actor. "Back to the Future", "Family Ties" Fraser, Brendan: Actor. "Gods and Monsters", "The Mummy" Frewer, Matt: Actor. played "Max Headroom", "Honey, I Shrunk the Kids", "Star Trek:TNG" George, Chief Dan: Actor. "Little Big Man" (AAN), "The Outlaw Josey Wales" Goulet, Robert: Singer, Actor. "Naked Gun 2 1/2: The Smell of Fear" Greene, Graham: Actor. "Dances with Wolves" (AAN) Greene, Lorne: Actor. Played Ben Cartwright on "Bonanza", "Battlestar Galactica" Greenwood, Bruce: Actor. "Exotica", "St. Elsewhere", "Nowhere Man" Gross, Paul: Actor. "Due South", "Buried on Sunday" Hartman, Phil: Actor, Comedian. "Saturday Night Live", "News Radio" Hill, Arthur: Actor. "The Andromeda Strain", "A Bridge Too Far" Huston, Walter: Actor. "The Treasure of the Sierra Madre" (AA), "Dodsworth", "The Devil and Daniel Webster", father of John Huston Ireland, John: Actor. "All the King's Men", "Spartacus" Ironside, Michael: Actor. "Scanners", "Top Gun", "Total Recall" Levy, Eugene: Comedian, Actor. "SCTV", American Pie Movies Lockhart, Gene: Actor. "Abe Lincoln in Illinois", "The Devil and Daniel Webster", "His Girl Friday", "Algiers" (AAN) McCormack, Eric: Actor. "Will & Grace", "Street Justice" McCulloch, Bruce: Comedian. "Kids in the Hall" McDonald, Kevin: Comedian. "Kids in the Hall" MacDonald, Norm: Comedian, Actor: "Saturday Night Live" McKinney, Mark: Comedian. "Kids in the Hall", "Saturday Night Live" Mandel, Howie: Comedian, Actor. "St. Elsewhere" Manners, David: Actor, Author. "Dracula" (1930), "The Mummy" Massey, Raymond: Actor. "Abe Lincoln in Illinois"(AAN), "East of Eden", "The Naked and the Dead" Moranis, Rick: Comedian, Actor. "SCTV", "Honey, I Shrunk the Kids" Morse, Barry: Actor. "The Fugitive" (the original series), "Space 1999" Myers, Mike: Comedian, Actor. Wayne Campbell on "Saturday Night Live" Neville, John: Actor. "The Adventures of Baron Munchausen" Nielsen, Leslie: Actor. "The Naked Gun", "Forbidden Planet". Brother was Deputy Prime Minister Ontkean, Michael: Actor. "The Rookies", "Twin Peaks". Perry, Matthew: Actor. "Friends" Pidgeon, Walter: Actor. "How Green Was My Valley", "Forbidden Planet" Pinsent, Gordon: Actor, Writer. "The Rowdy Man", "Who has Seen the Wind?", "John and the Missus", "Due South" Plummer, Christopher: Actor. "The Sound of Music", "Star Trek VI" Priestley, Jason: Actor. "Beverly Hills 90210" Qualen, John: Actor. "Casablanca", "The Devil and Daniel Webster", "The Searchers", "Anatomy of a Murder" Reeves, Keanu: Actor. "Johnny Mnemonic", "Speed", "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure" Rubinek, Saul: Actor. "Unforgiven", "The Outside Chance of Maximilian Glick", "Star Trek:TNG" Russell, Harold: Actor, Soldier. received two Academy Awards for role in "The Best Years of Our Lives" Sarrazin, Michael: Actor. "They Shoot Horses Don't They?", "Joshua Then and Now" Sawa, Devon: Actor. "Casper" Movie Sennett, Mack: Director, Comedian, Actor, Producer. the Keystone Kops, "Tillie's Punctured Romance" Shatner, William: Actor. Captain James T. Kirk on "Star Trek" Short, Martin: Comedian, Actor. "SCTV", "Saturday Night Live", "Clifford" Silverheels, Jay: Actor. Tonto on "The Lone Ranger", "Key Largo" Sutherland, Donald: Actor. "M*A*S*H", "Klute", "Ordinary People", "Eye of the Needle", "Bethune" Sutherland, Kiefer: Actor, Director. "The Bay Boy", "Stand By Me", "A Few Good Men" Thicke, Alan: Actor. "Hope and Gloria",Growing Pains Thomas, Dave: Comedian. "SCTV", "Strange Brew", "Grace Under Fire" Thompson, Scott: Comedian, Actor. "Kids in the Hall" Vernon, John: Actor. "Animal House", "Dirty Harry" Wincott, Jeff: "Night Heat" Wincott, Michael: "The Crow", "Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves", "1492, Conquest of Paradise" Wiseman, Joseph: Actor. "The Apprenticeship of Duddy Kravitz", played "Dr. No"
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#21
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
Don't forget Terrance and Phillip
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#22
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
Here is a link of Canadian Bands,
iam sick of typing stuff, http://www.canoe.ca/JamMusicPopEncycloPages/a.html
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#23
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
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Mr. Sundback was born in Sweden and lived in the USA when he invented the zipper (patent was made in Hoboken, NJ). He moved to Canada later. But who cares, I like buttons.
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#24
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
Paul,
Unless you singlehandedly were responsible for rock, jazz, rap, R&B, soul, Ernest Hemingway, the Declaration of Independence, the Constitution, the Emancipation Proclamation, etc. etc..... just shut it. The only reason you're boastful is from a pure accident of birth. You just as easily could have been born in Thailand or Nigeria or Chile. We're not gonna give you points because you come from the land of the brave when you yourself come off as a coward. So proud of being an American? EARN your stars and stripes. Clean up the mess America has created (at home and abroad). When you've achieved world peace, then we'll talk, okay? |
#25
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
Jesus, Pauly. I don't think anybody here spends too much time badmouthing "America" - a term that almost everybody on the planet would probably define differently. There's plenty of great things about America, as you yourself have pointed out. When people criticize American foreign policy, which is a perfectly valid line of thought, do you think they mean to criticize Mark Twain? When people criticize past American misdeeds, as many an observer of a superpower is wont to do, do you think they are implicitly slagging the principles in the Declaration of Independence? Do you honestly think we're slagging every single aspect of your country? What the fuck is going through your head? You've got to have one hell of an inferiority complex. And it is you who takes it upon yourself to assert that other countries are entirely valueless - it is you who displays the stupidity and prejudice here, and nobody else. Oh, the irony.
Again, you simply don't get it. You make fun of Canada being "neither envied nor hated nor respected nor emulated" without realizing that this is a good thing for us. I am perfectly content with Canada's ungreat position in the world, I don't care what anybody else thinks about it, and I envy nothing about your country, whatever you want to believe. I'm perfectly content with Canada's minimalist role on the world stage, as are the vast majority of my countrymen - especially since all we have to tolerate in return are the idiotic ramblings of Randist wiggers on diverse internet message boards.
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#26
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
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#27
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
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I could go on and on. |
#28
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
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#29
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
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So you're american, and americans have invented plenty of good and useful things over the years - exactly what did YOU have to do with any of them??
Last edited by Gazrock : 12-01-2004 at 03:26 AM. |
#30
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Re: If Canada disappeared, would anyone notice?
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