Kind of the opposite of being friends with an ex: doing a friend.

[DipDipDive]

I am going to Chicago this weekend to visit some friends of mine I've known since high school. They are both dudes, one of whom I've had sexual tension with literally since we've known eachother. We used to make out at parties and stuff back in the day, but nothing ever progressed beyond a little grabassing. Now that we're both single, and since we don't live in the same place / have to see eachother regularly (unless we choose to), I'm probably going to do him.

Rebound fling with a good friend - what are your thoughts?

[kaiser soze]

Just as bad - do you want to possibly alienate yourself from another person you are close with?

My friend and I came so close to the edge (literally - use your imagination), and we opted not to. We had the chance to burn off some sexual tension (also did the same when I visited her during a crazy weekend in NYC)....and it is nice to know each other naked, in a way it made us closer without all the fuss sex brings.

We are both very thankful we didn't make that mistake, it can make you think you are entitled to more than a friendship when all you need is the friendship.

[DipDipDive]

Hmmmm...

I know something is going to happen. Perhaps not the p in v.

So ks, you guys hooked up but didn't have sex, is that correct?

[kaiser soze]

If you call getting naked and doing everything other than intercourse hooking up - then yes

Like I said we were on the edge - things touched and just a little shift and wiggle would have been kapow!

We don't reminisce on the experience out of respect for our significant others. But it definitely has made us closer in the sense of being open about things which does not include expressing our feelings for each other on an intimate level. We know we are just friends and we love each other as such.

Beware - you might be enticed to brag about this to your ex (either directly or indirectly) as a way to show you're new found (and semi-superficial) independence as a way to generate jealousy.

Have fun, but keep in mind - you just broke up with someone you really loved and yearn for that kind of connection and it won't be there.

[DipDipDive]

I am absolutely never going to tell the ex anything about my encounters that are to follow our relationship. That's not my style, and it's not his, either.

I appreciate hearing about your experience. I have thought about going the sexy-time-but-no-sex route. I've been telling myself that if we are going to do some things, we might as well do it all, but I know that actual sex is a lot different than the rest of it. So I don't know...we'll see what happens.

We're both fragile little lambs right now and we care about eachother a lot, so I don't think feelings will get hurt. You're right about it not being a replacement for what I had with my ex...I know it could never be.

So yeah, thanks for your advice.

[miss soul fire]

I say forget about men in general. They are too complicated. You are looking for trouble, little girl!

[monkey]

imo, rebound sex is great, but rebound sex with a friend could get complicated. i assume he knows you're rebounding and if he's a good friend as you've mentioned, then he's probably not out to hurt you in any way and he's probably going to be more gentle (emotionally, not sexually) than a random rebound. this makes me think that it wouldn't be the most terrible idea. BUT, the other peoples here have a point. if you can wait to get sexual, you might want to try that.

i feel like in these situations, ive always made mistakes, no matter what path i've taken, so i honestly don't know if it's a good idea or not. you're a pretty and smart lady, so i think that through all these hard times, you'll do fine.

hehe "hard" times. im 12.

[Adam]

I want sex, it's been far too long.

I don't think I'm bad looking, a little too fat for most people maybe but I'm pretty fit atm, decent enough in bed and will always provide cab fare.

Maybe I will send a few inappropiate texts to my friends, see if they bite.

[tejana]

dip,

this ain't gonna sound nice, but i've been there--

you sound like someone who feels like shit and wants to do something drastic and crazy just for the drama and craziness that will distract you from obsessed thinking about your ex AND self-pitifulness. yeah, you can screw your pal, prob not a good idea, or it can end up no big deal.

but it sure ain't gonna help or make you feel any better. you have to move forward, but NOT impatiently. what, you need a guy to make you feel better? slapping a new sex partner/romance on like a band-aid is just desperate.

again, ain't sayin don't do it. just don't ya think it's gonna do ya any good. and after all your recent heartache, i'd love to see ya focus on doing some good for yourself.

[saz]

wow, ddd is really craving the cock.

[monkey]

Originally Posted by tejana

again, ain't sayin don't do it. just don't ya think it's gonna do ya any good. and after all your recent heartache, i'd love to see ya focus on doing some good for yourself.

but why isn't getting some good for her? i would think that satisfying a sexual craving is perfectly healthy, especially if she's fully aware that that's all that it is. i don't think every time a person goes through a breakup and then has a rebound that it's because you're trying to slap a bandaid on your heartbreak. it's about getting off. maybe im missing something?

[miss soul fire]

I agree with Tejana. However, if you don't mind about the consequences, then do it. Hihi.

[DipDipDive]

Originally Posted by tejana

dip,

this ain't gonna sound nice, but i've been there--

you sound like someone who feels like shit and wants to do something drastic and crazy just for the drama and craziness that will distract you from obsessed thinking about your ex AND self-pitifulness.

Nah, I'm not like that. I really feel my feelings (too intensely sometimes) and try to understand what they mean.

The distraction part may be true, but it's just about sex, not causing drama.

Still, I see your point.

ALSO, p, thanks for the sweet words.

[tejana]

then i say

1. good luck
2. don't try to force it to happen ( cuz that IS drama)-- it might be a good weekend without the sexage
3. BYOC = bring your own condoms!!! his will be old and crunchy from his wallet, eww!

[Echewta]

You are an adult. Single. Go for it. Friendship will last if its meant to. Have some fun, you need it.

[Drederick Tatum]

yeah do it. if it gets dramatic that just makes life more interesting.

[Adam]

Originally Posted by Drederick Tatum

yeah do it. if it gets dramatic that just makes life more interesting.

And the board

[Belt Parkway]

Pray to God...if you're going to do the p in the v, rub one out for him first so the p is in the v for longer than 45 seconds. If there's that much sexual tension, things will blow quickly.

[DipDipDive]

I don't do hjs!