Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

[abbott]

Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:
My youngest turns 2 on 8/8 and my wife and I are on the same page that 2 kids is enough for us. For the past two years I have been told get the vasectomy, use a condom or no deal. My wife did offer to use the pill, and she did when we were young, but now I am against the daily medication for her.
I am not snipped so: no condom no deal. Over the past 2 years I can account for 20 12 packs based off my grocery store accounting . I always buy Trojan the types available at the local store use to be Twisted Pleaser, Her Pleasure, Shared Pleasure, Warm Sensation and Ultra Thin. Of those the Warm Sensation was my pick but I had them all. Those are gone now and the 2 options are now Ecstasy or Fire and Ice. Fire and Ice is the winner by a long shot by both my wife’s and my opinion. So I am not a condom expert or am I ? Anyway, I am at a point where I am breaking down and considering doctors to do the job so I can scrap the condom. At 38 maybe I should just do it, but I just hate to regret it and anyway I don’t know what to do. What if I want more kids? What if…. I just don’t know, but I know I actually don’t like condoms and dream about not using them. 2 kids is what we can manage/afford and I know the infant stage is ruff on both of us. My 2 year old wakes up at 5 am like clock work no matter what and the attention she needs might just kill me and my wife so the third accidental kid would be considered a blessing but we are working to insure 2 is it. I am pretty sure I am getting snipped, but I hate to drop $600 to let someone cut on my balls is another reoccurring thought. I have not set the appointment yet, but the doctors number is in my calendar. Set it or condoms for another year???????????????
Finally the real story is my wife is 2 months late and now I am beginning to think I have wasted my time with 2 years of condoms. WTF……..

[Rodie]

First let me just say when I first saw this I thought it said "Condoms vs. Getting Sniped." That'd be a pretty easy choice in my book.

Anyway, my wife and I haven't started having kids yet but she asked that when we're done I get a vasectomy (as opposed to her getting her tubes tied). Hey after all she'll have to do between pregnancy, birth, nursing, etc. I'm fine with that thought. Interesting though that you bring up that you may want to have more kids. I can see what you're saying about regretting it, and seeing as I don't yet have kids I'm probably not the best person to respond to this dilemma. Condoms are an annoyance, but I totally feel you on not wanting her to be on the pill. All I can say is that you should take your time to discuss the issue with the Mrs. and try and decide the likelihood that you'll have more kids. You can always have a vasectomy reversed if you decide you want more.

[ms.peachy]

Mr.p and I are at something of the same point. Hormonal birth control has never agreed with me, personally. We're fans of the Durex Avanti condoms, those polyvinyl ones, as they are thinner and stronger than the latex varieties. (More expensive though.) That said... I would prefer to do away with them and would like for mr.p to have the snip. We're both quite certain we don't want any more children, so it's not a question of "Are we really done?" Believe me, we are really done. I mean if 'something happened' and I got pregnant now, we'd probably opt to have another baby vs. have a termination, so long as all signs were good and healthy and all that, but we're for sure not planning to have any more. But so far mr.p has been a bit resistant to the whole vasectomy thing. It's like, he acknowledges that it's really the best option, and that he's thinking about it, but he hasn't just gone and done it. I'm trying to be patient and let him work through whatever he's got to work through in his head about it. I know that two of his good mates have had it done (as the wives, we all talk about this stuff, you know) and I think that he's talked to them about their experience, but he's still wavering.

[checkyourprez]

i think what it comes down to for the man is basically a feeling of emasculation.


there are other options than birth control for the woman. my girlfriend has something, i forget the name at the moment, but its good for five years. she doesn't even really get periods (physically, emotionally its still there ) i've put in a lot of kids worth of semen in her and i'm still childless.

[ms.peachy]

Originally Posted by checkyourprez

there are other options than birth control for the woman.

Yes, I can think of two. Pregnancy and celibacy.

The fact is, all birth control for women is hormone based, with the exception of some intrauterine devices - and those devices come with their own share of risks. Tubal ligation is invasive surgery, whereas a vasectomy is a simple outpatient procedure, and has no hormonal effect for the man - it's basically just another 'barrier method'.

I understand that some men need to get their heads around the connection between their 'potency' and their manhood, but the fact is, that connection is emotional, and not physical. I get that it's a struggle - I know well one family who had to go the IVF route because of infertility on the part of the husband, and that was a tough blow for him emotionally, so I'm not trying to minimise the emotional impact. I do think though, that in a committed partnership, once the woman has done several years of "heavy lifting" with regard to pregnancy, birth, and hormone based birth control, it is not unreasonable to expect the man to be logical and reasonable rather than emotional (you know, like they claim they want women to be) about the issue and to make a decision about this based on facts.

[checkyourprez]

Originally Posted by ms.peachy

Yes, I can think of two. Pregnancy and celibacy.

The fact is, all birth control for women is hormone based, with the exception of some intrauterine devices - and those devices come with their own share of risks. Tubal ligation is invasive surgery, whereas a vasectomy is a simple outpatient procedure, and has no hormonal effect for the man - it's basically just another 'barrier method'.

I understand that some men need to get their heads around the connection between their 'potency' and their manhood, but the fact is, that connection is emotional, and not physical. I get that it's a struggle - I know well one family who had to go the IVF route because of infertility on the part of the husband, and that was a tough blow for him emotionally, so I'm not trying to minimise the emotional impact. I do think though, that in a committed partnership, once the woman has done several years of "heavy lifting" with regard to pregnancy, birth, and hormone based birth control, it is not unreasonable to expect the man to be logical and reasonable rather than emotional (you know, like they claim they want women to be) about the issue and to make a decision about this based on facts.

what my gf is on is birth control, but i just dont know what its called. it is inserted in the uterus. she seems just as crazy after she got it as she did before..

but i get what your saying, it is reasonable. i honestly dont even know what i would do in this situation, i am miles away from having to make it though thats for sure.

in the end vasectomies artificially make a man impotent, and that can be an embarrassing thing not all men can deal with.

[nodanaonlyzuul]

Originally Posted by ms.peachy

Yes, I can think of two. Pregnancy and celibacy.

The fact is, all birth control for women is hormone based, with the exception of some intrauterine devices - and those devices come with their own share of risks. Tubal ligation is invasive surgery, whereas a vasectomy is a simple outpatient procedure, and has no hormonal effect for the man - it's basically just another 'barrier method'.

I understand that some men need to get their heads around the connection between their 'potency' and their manhood, but the fact is, that connection is emotional, and not physical. I get that it's a struggle - I know well one family who had to go the IVF route because of infertility on the part of the husband, and that was a tough blow for him emotionally, so I'm not trying to minimise the emotional impact. I do think though, that in a committed partnership, once the woman has done several years of "heavy lifting" with regard to pregnancy, birth, and hormone based birth control, it is not unreasonable to expect the man to be logical and reasonable rather than emotional (you know, like they claim they want women to be) about the issue and to make a decision about this based on facts.

Everything ms. p said is spot on.

[cosmo105]

He's talking about an IUD. The 5-year one actually does release birth control hormones, whereas there's a 12-year one that's made of copper that doesn't. It's great for ladies like me that are in monogamous relationships but don't want to swallow pregnant horse pee pills.

[abbott]

I'm going in tommrow at 1030, already had the consultation.

[hardnox71]

My wife and I have a boy who will be 1 on Sept. 24 and we have talked about this very same situation several times in the past year. She is 34 and I'm 40 and we each have one child from previous marriages.

I have never picked up a phone and made any calls to inquire about this but I haven't exactly said no whenever it's come up in conversation, either. I'm kind of leaning towards it for a couple of reasons. Of course, money is a huge factor in our decision to have more children but, in all honesty, what carries even more weight than that is....I'm just fucking exhausted, plain and simple. I'm not 25 anymore. This one year old is wearing me the fuck out. I can't do it again. Love my kids to death but I just don't want anymore.

Now, just gotta find the time to get to a doctor.....

[hardnox71]

Originally Posted by abbott

I'm going in tommrow at 1030, already had the consultation.

So, um.....how did it go?

[abbott]

its all over.

I can not tell you if you should ever do this or not. I thought about this for over 3 years and came to the conclusion it is time. I would have done it sooner but it was $2000. The final catalyst was a letter in the mail from my insurance telling me that this was now covered 100%. So between the medication, consultation and all I spent about $30 and worked with the most recommended Dr.

I was most concerned about the processes itself and pain following. never really had any pain, because I was so medicated and the surgery itself was nerve racking. The shot was the worst part, but just knowing what was going on was ruff. I could not stop gripping the side of the bed and had to work just to breath right. 15 minutes later I drove myself home.

A few things that help me draw my conclusion was: I am old, I have 2 girls that I need to give more to already, also. I am sick of condoms.

Anyway, Percocet was the drug and it does not say to avoid alcohol, it says alcohol enhances effect, so I also got a case of beer. 12 Shiner Bock and 12 Sam Adams Octoberfest.

As soon as I got home at noon on Friday, I spent Friday and Saturday in bed drunk and Medicated. on Sunday I had 4 beers left and 4 pills. Today there is 3 pills and 1 beer, so Sunday was phasing back into reality. Today is all good, going back to work. I hope its over, but I will find out.

OK, one side note. Before the surgery, I had to go to a consultation and there were 10 guys in the meeting. One of the guys was the pastor from my church. You know the guy who told me to quit drinking light beer... Thought it was funny to see him there. He is 1 year younger than me and has 4 girls.

[cj hood]

i'm flirting with the idea of getting it done...some of my buddies have. i've heard good & bad experiences about the actual process. i'm not a fan of unnecessary surgeries. still thinkin about it....