WAAAAAAAAHHHHHH

[cosmo105]

So, all through junior high and high school I sought out and saved every clipping and poster and scrap that I could find that was even remotely Beastie related. I put it up on my wall over my bed. I had magazine covers and articles, a picture of Adrock with an "I love you Jessica" speech bubble, stickers I never took off the backing but taped to the wall, and the stickers and reviews from every album. It wasn't anything like a serious collector's collection, but it was mine, my little piece of them. I wrote THE BEASTIE WALL over it and was so proud.

My mom just had a bunch of remodeling done, and I had gotten all of my old stuff out of a different bedroom but not that one since my sister lives in it now - and she thought I had gotten everything that I wanted out of it. I went over today and happened to be in the room for a bit before leaving and realized the walls had been repainted - and all of my posters were gone. Everything. Mom and sis realized with horror that they hadn't thought to tell me they had thrown that all away and I instantly fell to pieces. Couldn't stop crying for a good hour or so.

Literally LAST NIGHT I went to a Yauch memorial screening, at which I of course teared up, and then had dreams that D and Horovitz asked me to fill in for him while he recovered. (Talk about waking up heartbroken.) I know it's just a collection of paper and it was just stuff but it was MY stuff, it took me years to put it together. Adolescence was really shitty for me, and the Beastie Boys were something so cool and so fun and genuine that I just latched onto when I was 12. I haven't really been into them over the last few years, since TT5B really, but they hold such a huge special place in my heart and the thought of all of that being ripped off the walls, crumpled up and thrown in the trash literally made my heart hurt. My mom feels terrible and I didn't want to make her feel worse so I left pretty soon after I found out, but GUHHHH talk about terrible timing. I'm 28 and all, and I suppose I should have taken that out a long time ago if I really wanted to keep it since it's not my house and all but I left it up partially because my little sis grew to love them too.

ANYWAY. I figured you guys would understand me being pretty sad about this. Also, it was my birthday the other night and by midnight the 10 people that had shown up already left and the 30 other people that RSVPed didn't show up, so THAT hurt. Anyone else had something else precious inadvertently tossed?

[Mae]

That's gut wrenching. Like your childhood was wadded up and thrown out.

of course you are upset. Naturally.

Virtually ever time I go home my mother has gotten rid of something else that I used to love as a kid, or something else has changed in my old house. Even the fact that my old neighborhood and old school is completely different now, throws me.

I had a similar shrine in my basement to Quentin Tarantino set up. My mother tore that down ages ago, but I remember her telling me over the phone and me just kind of freezing and saying "Um. what?!"

I get it.

[Pres Zount]

I never had a Beastie Wall, or any sort of collection of photos, magazine clippings, or anything like that, all because for some reason I always got the feeling that if I started collecting then I would never be able to stop. It was hard enough to not purchase every record, cassette, CD or bootleg of the Beasties that I ever came across. I regret that 'willpower' a lot, especially now that Yauch has passed away.

Recently I started saving pictures of MCA memorial graffiti and what not, and then that sort of escalated into general pictures of MCA, then all three of them... then I noticed that there was nothing that I was going to do with these pictures, apart form feel nostalgic. I can feel nostalgic all on my lonesome. Still, a lot of the MCA memorial art is really cool and stuff.

When I started my last job several years back, I was given a locker to keep my stuff in, and it already had a copy of a 1998 Rolling Stone, with the Beasties on the cover, which is a great photo, and I kept it in there for the 5 or 6 years I worked there. When I quit, I forgot to get it out, and felt too embarrassed to go back afterwards to collect a magazine. I wonder if it's still there.

[cosmo105]

Originally Posted by Pres Zount

When I started my last job several years back, I was given a locker to keep my stuff in, and it already had a copy of a 1998 Rolling Stone, with the Beasties on the cover, which is a great photo, and I kept it in there for the 5 or 6 years I worked there. When I quit, I forgot to get it out, and felt too embarrassed to go back afterwards to collect a magazine. I wonder if it's still there.

I had a collector's-quality edition of that, sealed in plastic, affixed to the wall. Sniffle

[Adam]

I'm sorry, that sucks.

I'm a hoarder but I have got rid of a lot of stuff. Like a lot of people, even though I am on BBMB a lot I haven't been all that into Beasties for a few years.

But I still have bits I've kept somehow although I haven't had a massive lost anything like cosmos. Maybe we could start a cosmo fund and send cut outs etc we can spare? Like a justgiving page? Might not be the same though since it's other people nostalgia.

[cosmo105]

Originally Posted by Adam

I'm sorry, that sucks.

I'm a hoarder but I have got rid of a lot of stuff. Like a lot of people, even though I am on BBMB a lot I haven't been all that into Beasties for a few years.

But I still have bits I've kept somehow although I haven't had a massive lost anything like cosmos. Maybe we could start a cosmo fund and send cut outs etc we can spare? Like a justgiving page? Might not be the same though since it's other people nostalgia.

Aw, that's a sweet thought Adam. Yeah, it wouldn't really be the same - it was the fact that I spent all that time collecting it and what that time meant to me and all. I used to be a big time messy pack rat in high school and have since become very efficient and good about throwing things away. This was one thing I guess I never even imagined not being around anymore. One of the posters was one that my brother bought for me to cheer me up the day my dad died. Very strong memories attached to that.

Thanks for the insight, Ms. P. I'll read up on that. Like I said, I've gotten much better about "stuff" over the years, and I'm a happier person for it.

[KingPsyz]

I got some $2Bill posters around somewhere if it would help?

[ms.peachy]

I completely understand why you are upset. However, here is one way you can look at this situation: this event is maybe Yauch's final, perfect parting gift to you. You are being presented with the perfect opportunity to examine "the four noble truths" of Buddhism - the first two in particular (well, one has to start at the start, after all). Take some time and think about it. I'm not suggesting you become a practicing Buddhist (unless you really feel drawn to do that) or that contemplating this will necessarily make you 'feel better', only that a bit of introspection on what's happened and why (and curiously, why now) might fuel some degree of personal, spiritual growth.

Just throwing that out there.