Originally Posted by zippo
Aww, work environments can always be difficult. I think it's nearly impossible to find one where there's no drama, it's like something inherent to it- in a large group of people there's many similarities but also differences. and I also think it's about how one handles it, and essentially, learns to handle it because experience with this kind of crap can help you a lot. I'm sure whichever job you're in right now it might be better in part because you've learned how to handle certain difficulties, and if not, make sure to remember your past experiences because many patterns repeat: jealousy, gossip, gaslighting, bitchiness, two-facing and the list goes on and on! But these things are always going to exist. It's about how one matures and finds ways to deal with them better.
I would also say that self-reflecting helps a lot as well. You mentioned you like to say what you think and be straight with your opinions about improvements for the company. Getting your points across is also about communication skills and part of that is fine tuning the way you say things and making sure it's assertive and respectful to others.
All in all, sometimes it can be difficult but reminding yourself about your abilities and trying to care less about what others think is helpful as well.
I think a lot of this is spot on, but I also think that in retrospect, I was in a particularly weird situation. Iím still friends with people I worked with at the first job mentioned, and weíre all kind of traumatized.
One thing I learned from my therapist friend ( who graciously sat down and listened to the whole story without charging me anything) is that some people thrive on chaos. She said Iím always trying to be pragmatic and fix things and improve things and not everyone is like that, some people love mess.
Anyway, accepting that has helped me calm down and realize I canít control other people and if I want to run a business my way, I have to create my own..which, maybe Iíll try to do one day. My partner has started a business so Iím helping him for now at least.
Itís been a tough two years for me but now Iím in a place where I donít have a ton of stress at work for the first time since high school, honestly. I work in a department with 7 men in their 40s, 50s and 60s. The first time in a long time that Iíve worked with people with more experience than me, and they know I know my shit and ironically itís the least sexist and most respectful workspace Iíve been in. Would be cool if it paid more! Lol