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#1
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So I may wind up killing myself later...
Probably not though.
I was reading Dorothy's thread on shyness and I can relate because I'm just as awkward in real life, but since I've known most of you for four years on here, I don't really feel out of place on the board. What sucks about it is that I've seem to have developed a habit of falling for girl friends who I'd like to become more than friends with, but I'm too awkward and shy to tell them and I wind up beating myself up for it. If it's a girl I've never met, I'm awkward, yes, but at least if she says know I can just talk bad about her behind her back anonymously. But now, there's this girl, Alyssa, with whom I've become really close with over the summer and I've kinda developed feelings for, especially since she left to go on vacation for three weeks and I barely even talked to her. We both start school today, the same school, and I figure today I'm going to take the monumental step of telling her I like her like her. She was telling me about this Ben kid she likes and all that, and I think she recognized the fact I didn't care because when I'm depressed or upset I use one word answers and avoid eye contact. I make it completely obvious in other words. I'm scared to lose her as a friend, but with school starting and maybe meeting new people, I don't see us as being as close anymore (plus, Goddammit, she doesn't have texting on her phone anymore because of a high bill, so I gotta call and shit...fuck) and I figure I'll wind up pissed off and upset I didn't at least tell her. It's quite a big step for me since usually I talk myself out of losing someone I care about, but hey, might as well go for gold this time. I like this girl too much to not try. And I'm aware this all sounded very High School Musical and juvenile, but whatever. I just had to tell somebody.
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#2
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
Can I have your watch when you are dead?
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#3
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
i love shy guys
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#4
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
I don't think you should tell her, especially since she's already indicated interest in someone else. This is going to end bad for you if she says she only wants to be friends.
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#5
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
Yeah, I know what you mean Toucan but I feel like it's something I have to do just for me. It sucks watching everybody else be happy with the girl that I want, so at the very least, I just have to try.
Plus I'm a lyrical gangster and I can talk my way into staying friends. That's how it works out in my head anyway.
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#6
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
do tell her.
don't kill yourself. |
#7
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
I guess you can only rely on the experiences of others, so here's mine:
Two occasions have passed where I wanted to be more than friends with female friends; I was under some illusion that we would be perfect because we talked well, hung out and joked and so on and blah blah. Each time I revealed my feelings, it was a roaring failure. One girl said that the thought to her was 'weird', that she'd fancied me when I was 16-17 (when she was 19 - 20) but thought an age gap at that age would be hard to overcome. And so her feelings subsided just perfectly to coincide with my humiliation. Awesomes. The other time, we were friends, I knew she was into one of my buddies, I fucking acted like a knob-end trying to be 'right' for this girl and she said she couldn't do it. Maybe at one time, but not now or some shit. Fucked. So I was pretty forlorn both times. Self-doubt, self-loathing and so on. I have to say being a married dude now has given me two perspectives on this shit, though. One, I would never have met wifey had anything been different, so I'm glad those two never happened. Two, even if you got together with one of these chicks, the odds are stacked in favour of it ending like most relationships (I mean, are you wanting to marry this girl?), either badly and with much hostility, or just fizzling out and being back at square one. So I guess you have to think about what happens after the credits roll on your romance story. Even if you get together, it's note to being just another relationship. In that sense, if she rejects you, think about it as no big loss because it really isn't. I'd avoid telling her your feelings, but as I've pointed out, you don't learn what it's like to be emasculated unless you open your mouth on these things.
Last edited by Kid Presentable : 08-25-2008 at 08:37 AM. |
#8
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
You made the right choice.
Trust me, when you get to be an old fuck like me you'll regret not trying. Everyone has crushes in their life. Most of us are too chicken-shit to do anything about it and years later when you look back on things you'll realize that she was probably as much into you as you were into her. Dude, she likes you. trust. That story about that other dude could have been her testing you to see what your reaction would be at the idea of her being with another guy. Make her a mix CD. Last edited by RobMoney$ : 08-25-2008 at 05:58 PM. |
#9
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
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#10
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
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#11
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
Quote:
Bad News Bears=Life. |
#12
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
Quote:
i'm down with the organic suggestion. don't blow her away with big words, just give her some more to think about and find more reasons to hang out with her each time
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#13
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
call me a hopeless romantic, but I'm a big fan of love letters. one option you have is to write it down, if you think you'll get tongue tied. if she doesn't think that's sweet, she's a ho.
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#14
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
Write it with a Sharpie. That will make it stand out, as well as make it special.
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#15
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
especially if you write in on her forehead while she's sleeping or passed out drunk.
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#16
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
i wrote mine on engineering graph paper
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#17
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.
I love you, Douchebag.
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#18
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Re: .
Last edited by Myu-to : 08-25-2008 at 01:45 PM. |
#19
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In my experience with close guy friends who later developed feelings.
Don't drop a bomb on her, if she felt the same you would already know. This has happened to me three times, and one in particular devasated me and things were never the same, and for the past 5 years I wished he didn't tell me.He slowly withdrew from me, and I lost one of my dearest best friends. Do something small, give her a pretty single flower ....ask her out on a "date" a small gesture see what happens |
#20
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
Exactly, which is why you should do nothing and let her make a move. Otherwise move on to someone else.
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#21
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
If you are going to regret it for never going for it...
then just fucking do it. I say that with love. |
#22
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
whatever you do, DON'T leave a message on her phone singing "and then i go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like i like you"
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#23
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Re: So I may wind up killing myself later...
Mr.p has on occasion said that if he could go back in time and tell his younger self anything, it would be, when you like a chick, just go for it. Don't spend time going endlessly over "should I shouldn't I what if she says what if she doesn't does she doesn't she will I look like a what if she thinks I'm blah blah blah". Just fucking go for it. And sometimes you'll win and sometimes you'll lose but so fucking what. If it doesn't work out with one, another will come along. This isn't to say that women are all interchangeable or should be thought of as objects, only that there are actually a whole load of really fab, funny, decent attractive girls out there if you just have a look around, and you could potentially have a really nice time getting to know any one of them.
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#24
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Wtf?
I told you not to do it as well. Like I said, you'll know when someone has mutual feelings. It usually isn't a puzzle. Sorry to hear it didn't work out, at least you didn't make an ass out of yourself telling her how you feel. |
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