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Old 08-08-2010, 10:41 AM
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Default Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:
My youngest turns 2 on 8/8 and my wife and I are on the same page that 2 kids is enough for us. For the past two years I have been told get the vasectomy, use a condom or no deal. My wife did offer to use the pill, and she did when we were young, but now I am against the daily medication for her.
I am not snipped so: no condom no deal. Over the past 2 years I can account for 20 12 packs based off my grocery store accounting . I always buy Trojan the types available at the local store use to be Twisted Pleaser, Her Pleasure, Shared Pleasure, Warm Sensation and Ultra Thin. Of those the Warm Sensation was my pick but I had them all. Those are gone now and the 2 options are now Ecstasy or Fire and Ice. Fire and Ice is the winner by a long shot by both my wife’s and my opinion. So I am not a condom expert or am I ? Anyway, I am at a point where I am breaking down and considering doctors to do the job so I can scrap the condom. At 38 maybe I should just do it, but I just hate to regret it and anyway I don’t know what to do. What if I want more kids? What if…. I just don’t know, but I know I actually don’t like condoms and dream about not using them. 2 kids is what we can manage/afford and I know the infant stage is ruff on both of us. My 2 year old wakes up at 5 am like clock work no matter what and the attention she needs might just kill me and my wife so the third accidental kid would be considered a blessing but we are working to insure 2 is it. I am pretty sure I am getting snipped, but I hate to drop $600 to let someone cut on my balls is another reoccurring thought. I have not set the appointment yet, but the doctors number is in my calendar. Set it or condoms for another year???????????????
Finally the real story is my wife is 2 months late and now I am beginning to think I have wasted my time with 2 years of condoms. WTF……..



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  #2  
Old 08-08-2010, 11:19 AM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

First let me just say when I first saw this I thought it said "Condoms vs. Getting Sniped." That'd be a pretty easy choice in my book.

Anyway, my wife and I haven't started having kids yet but she asked that when we're done I get a vasectomy (as opposed to her getting her tubes tied). Hey after all she'll have to do between pregnancy, birth, nursing, etc. I'm fine with that thought. Interesting though that you bring up that you may want to have more kids. I can see what you're saying about regretting it, and seeing as I don't yet have kids I'm probably not the best person to respond to this dilemma. Condoms are an annoyance, but I totally feel you on not wanting her to be on the pill. All I can say is that you should take your time to discuss the issue with the Mrs. and try and decide the likelihood that you'll have more kids. You can always have a vasectomy reversed if you decide you want more.



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Old 08-08-2010, 11:25 AM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

Mr.p and I are at something of the same point. Hormonal birth control has never agreed with me, personally. We're fans of the Durex Avanti condoms, those polyvinyl ones, as they are thinner and stronger than the latex varieties. (More expensive though.) That said... I would prefer to do away with them and would like for mr.p to have the snip. We're both quite certain we don't want any more children, so it's not a question of "Are we really done?" Believe me, we are really done. I mean if 'something happened' and I got pregnant now, we'd probably opt to have another baby vs. have a termination, so long as all signs were good and healthy and all that, but we're for sure not planning to have any more. But so far mr.p has been a bit resistant to the whole vasectomy thing. It's like, he acknowledges that it's really the best option, and that he's thinking about it, but he hasn't just gone and done it. I'm trying to be patient and let him work through whatever he's got to work through in his head about it. I know that two of his good mates have had it done (as the wives, we all talk about this stuff, you know) and I think that he's talked to them about their experience, but he's still wavering.
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Old 08-08-2010, 02:39 PM
checkyourprez checkyourprez is offline
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

i think what it comes down to for the man is basically a feeling of emasculation.


there are other options than birth control for the woman. my girlfriend has something, i forget the name at the moment, but its good for five years. she doesn't even really get periods (physically, emotionally its still there ) i've put in a lot of kids worth of semen in her and i'm still childless.
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Old 08-08-2010, 03:09 PM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

Quote:
Originally Posted by checkyourprez View Post

there are other options than birth control for the woman.
Yes, I can think of two. Pregnancy and celibacy.

The fact is, all birth control for women is hormone based, with the exception of some intrauterine devices - and those devices come with their own share of risks. Tubal ligation is invasive surgery, whereas a vasectomy is a simple outpatient procedure, and has no hormonal effect for the man - it's basically just another 'barrier method'.

I understand that some men need to get their heads around the connection between their 'potency' and their manhood, but the fact is, that connection is emotional, and not physical. I get that it's a struggle - I know well one family who had to go the IVF route because of infertility on the part of the husband, and that was a tough blow for him emotionally, so I'm not trying to minimise the emotional impact. I do think though, that in a committed partnership, once the woman has done several years of "heavy lifting" with regard to pregnancy, birth, and hormone based birth control, it is not unreasonable to expect the man to be logical and reasonable rather than emotional (you know, like they claim they want women to be) about the issue and to make a decision about this based on facts.
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Old 08-08-2010, 06:28 PM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

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Originally Posted by ms.peachy View Post
Yes, I can think of two. Pregnancy and celibacy.

The fact is, all birth control for women is hormone based, with the exception of some intrauterine devices - and those devices come with their own share of risks. Tubal ligation is invasive surgery, whereas a vasectomy is a simple outpatient procedure, and has no hormonal effect for the man - it's basically just another 'barrier method'.

I understand that some men need to get their heads around the connection between their 'potency' and their manhood, but the fact is, that connection is emotional, and not physical. I get that it's a struggle - I know well one family who had to go the IVF route because of infertility on the part of the husband, and that was a tough blow for him emotionally, so I'm not trying to minimise the emotional impact. I do think though, that in a committed partnership, once the woman has done several years of "heavy lifting" with regard to pregnancy, birth, and hormone based birth control, it is not unreasonable to expect the man to be logical and reasonable rather than emotional (you know, like they claim they want women to be) about the issue and to make a decision about this based on facts.

what my gf is on is birth control, but i just dont know what its called. it is inserted in the uterus. she seems just as crazy after she got it as she did before..

but i get what your saying, it is reasonable. i honestly dont even know what i would do in this situation, i am miles away from having to make it though thats for sure.

in the end vasectomies artificially make a man impotent, and that can be an embarrassing thing not all men can deal with.
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Old 08-09-2010, 01:23 PM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

Quote:
Originally Posted by ms.peachy View Post
Yes, I can think of two. Pregnancy and celibacy.

The fact is, all birth control for women is hormone based, with the exception of some intrauterine devices - and those devices come with their own share of risks. Tubal ligation is invasive surgery, whereas a vasectomy is a simple outpatient procedure, and has no hormonal effect for the man - it's basically just another 'barrier method'.

I understand that some men need to get their heads around the connection between their 'potency' and their manhood, but the fact is, that connection is emotional, and not physical. I get that it's a struggle - I know well one family who had to go the IVF route because of infertility on the part of the husband, and that was a tough blow for him emotionally, so I'm not trying to minimise the emotional impact. I do think though, that in a committed partnership, once the woman has done several years of "heavy lifting" with regard to pregnancy, birth, and hormone based birth control, it is not unreasonable to expect the man to be logical and reasonable rather than emotional (you know, like they claim they want women to be) about the issue and to make a decision about this based on facts.

Everything ms. p said is spot on.



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Old 08-09-2010, 01:41 PM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

He's talking about an IUD. The 5-year one actually does release birth control hormones, whereas there's a 12-year one that's made of copper that doesn't. It's great for ladies like me that are in monogamous relationships but don't want to swallow pregnant horse pee pills.



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  #9  
Old 08-09-2010, 02:55 PM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

Of all my friends who've gotten cut, no one has expressed regret.



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  #10  
Old 08-09-2010, 03:03 PM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

this simple medical procedure should be offered up for free

walk in vasectomies for everyone!
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  #11  
Old 08-09-2010, 04:46 PM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

My co-worker has two children with his ex wife. They thought it was gonna be a forever thing so he got snipped. Well, he is divorced now. He has been in two long term relationships that ended because the chick wanted babies. I know they say its reversible, but thats not always 100%.

I know its not something anyone wants to think about, but.....yeah.

I'd get the snipperoo if I was in your shoes.



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  #12  
Old 08-09-2010, 05:17 PM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

How long does one usually date before the subject of whether or not you want kids comes up? Seems like I already knew yay or nay
within a month or two. Not neccesarily a timeline, but a general yes or no.



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  #13  
Old 08-09-2010, 06:15 PM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

i never thought about another relationship, shit my wife might leave me.

I hate to say I thought about it, but what if there was a tradgady and I had no kids? Well I think if that happens, I will rpobably be done anyway and never want kids ... but what if I wish I could have a kid?? I think this is the one objection I have in my head.

I could care less about my manley hood or whatever you call it, maybe ego?

Well, I am going to make the call, but I have been talking about it now for a year. My wife says I have to call, she wont make the call, I did ask her to. I guess I will make the call tomrrow............



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Old 08-09-2010, 08:49 PM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

**SERIOUS POST ALERT**



I've had a vasectomy.

I won't attempt to offer any advice one way or the other, but I will share my story and experience.
If it helps you, that's great.

I was 23yo when I made the decision to have it done. I was married to a beautiful woman, inside & out. The girl of my dreams. Couldn't imagine ever being apart from her. It just didn't even enter the thought process.
We loved each other like WHOA!

She had a son from a previous relationship who I loved and was raising as my own. We had a daughter together. Three months after she was born my wife became pregnant with our son. He was born almost exactly a year later.
I found myself being 22yo father raising and supporting three kids.
I had left school to take a full-time position to support my family.
Times were kinda tough, but we were all very happy.
My wife and I discussed options for preventing another pregnancy at this point. We both figured we would be together forever, and now we both had a son and a daughter. What more could you want, right? We didn't want or we couldn't afford anymore. We discussed having her tubes tied, but quickly came to understand that me having a vasectomy was much simplier, so I agreed to get it done.
I had to convince the urologist to do the proceedure. He didn't want to do it at first because I was so young.

A few months after my son was born he began exhibiting some peculiar behaviors for a child his age. My wife insisted he was fine. He went to the doctor for his regular checkups and his height and weight were always fine for his age. Blood work, shots, and everything always went fine. But by the time he was about 2.5 I had finally convinced my wife to let me take him to be evaluated at childrens hospital. The behavior specialist took about 2 minutes to determine that our son was autistic. He exhibited all the textbook behaviors and symptoms. Looking back on the day he was born I knew there was something different about him the minute he was born. I could just tell, I can't explain it, I just felt it. My wife and I both began regretting our decision to not have anymore kids.

By about the time my kids were about 8-10 years old my wife began having mental issues herself. She was diagnosed paranoid schizophrenic and manic depressive. She was admitted and released from mental hospitals half a dozen times in about a year. Our marriage obviously fell apart as she became ill and wanted no part of her kids or me. I watched the woman I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with degrade into insanity and become someone very sad and scary. I was left to raise my kids on my own and she moved back with her mother in between even more stays in the hospital.

After a few years of being a single parent I met someone via this very message board. We began an relationship and eventually moved in together. My kids grew to love her and look to her as a mother figure. Our relationship was good, but one of the issues we had to contend with was the fact that she wanted kids of her own very much. Although it is something I made her aware of very early in our relationship, we both ignored it in the begining. But the older she got, the more she started seeing the clock ticking away for her to have children. We discussed having my vasectomy reversed. We even discussed adoption. Both were alternatives we couldn't afford (both were about $10k). And starting over with another child was not really something I wanted to do at that point in life anyway. I can't say it was the only reason we broke up, but it was one of the reasons. It definitely led to a lot of disagreements and tension in the relationship.

I've luckily managed to meet a great girl who doesn't want kids, and doesn't think she can have them anyway. So my being snipped will hopefully never become an issue.

So in my experience, I'm not sure if I had the opportunity to go back and change my decision, if I would. At some points in my life, getting snipped was the right choice. Then at a later point in life it became a hinderence.
Life takes you places you never think you'd wind up in a million years.
I thought I was going to get married, raise my kids, have the dream family with the dream house.
Nobody ever thinks they're gonna wake up at almost 40yo, Divorced, single father of a special needs child, and just hoping I may have just found someone who could come close to the love I once felt for my wife.



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Old 08-09-2010, 09:19 PM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

Excellent post, sir. Some sad content in there, obviously, but it's a great share.



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Old 08-09-2010, 11:42 PM
checkyourprez checkyourprez is offline
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

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Excellent post, sir. Some sad content in there, obviously, but it's a great share.
.
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  #17  
Old 08-10-2010, 04:04 AM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

i've offered to get it done but the wife is all "never say never" and doesnt want to deprive me the chance of more kids should we something happen to her. This is also a little to do with that she obviously still wants another one but given our history she knows this would be tricky (very difficult 2nd birth which triggered a psychotic episode for my wife). Its funny the family went thru months of hell really but she still wants another one. I'd get it done tomorrow. She is on the pill but is talking about getting some sort of implant. I would have another one if i thought it wasnt going to endanger her or my family but i think the risk is too great.



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  #18  
Old 09-09-2010, 09:10 PM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

Just to relate my story.....

I was on birth control when I got pregnant with our first son. Took it same time every day, without fail so needless to say, I was shocked. We had our son just after a year of marriage and we were financially strapped to say the least. Knowing I didn't want to go back on the pill, I opted for the Depo shot and stayed on it for several years. Went off the Depo shot and got pregnant with #2 the first month.

We knew we didn't want, nor could afford, another so we decided if I needed a c-section with #2, I would have my tubes tied. Otherwise the hubs would have the snip. With our track record, we can't afford to take any chances on a third pregnancy.

It took him almost three years to muster up the courage to have it done. After talking to several men and a doctor about how it's not that bad, he was still hesitant (yes, Ms. P it's totally mental). He was out of the doctor's office in less than 10 minutes and even he said that it really wasn't that bad. It was the right decision for us, but if you're not 100% sure, I would say don't do it.



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  #19  
Old 09-10-2010, 03:52 AM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

It is the reason we are on this earth to multiply, that is a natural instinct. It is facing that head on with logic. Society doesn't help, its all about being a man, having some balls, doing the manly thing, physiologically you may think you're losing all that when having the snip. I can totally see why men hesitate even faced with blinding logic.

Are condoms so bad? Most sex I have and had is with condoms, its kinda what you get used to, there is some real thin ones out there now - like you say you have a chosen brand and make. But its not as 100% as getting snipped. Anyway, good luck whatever you do!



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  #20  
Old 09-08-2011, 06:33 PM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

I'm going in tommrow at 1030, already had the consultation.



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  #21  
Old 09-08-2011, 07:05 PM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

My wife and I have a boy who will be 1 on Sept. 24 and we have talked about this very same situation several times in the past year. She is 34 and I'm 40 and we each have one child from previous marriages.

I have never picked up a phone and made any calls to inquire about this but I haven't exactly said no whenever it's come up in conversation, either. I'm kind of leaning towards it for a couple of reasons. Of course, money is a huge factor in our decision to have more children but, in all honesty, what carries even more weight than that is....I'm just fucking exhausted, plain and simple. I'm not 25 anymore. This one year old is wearing me the fuck out. I can't do it again. Love my kids to death but I just don't want anymore.

Now, just gotta find the time to get to a doctor.....



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Old 09-12-2011, 08:00 AM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

Quote:
Originally Posted by abbott View Post
I'm going in tommrow at 1030, already had the consultation.
So, um.....how did it go?



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Old 09-12-2011, 08:13 AM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

its all over.

I can not tell you if you should ever do this or not. I thought about this for over 3 years and came to the conclusion it is time. I would have done it sooner but it was $2000. The final catalyst was a letter in the mail from my insurance telling me that this was now covered 100%. So between the medication, consultation and all I spent about $30 and worked with the most recommended Dr.

I was most concerned about the processes itself and pain following. never really had any pain, because I was so medicated and the surgery itself was nerve racking. The shot was the worst part, but just knowing what was going on was ruff. I could not stop gripping the side of the bed and had to work just to breath right. 15 minutes later I drove myself home.

A few things that help me draw my conclusion was: I am old, I have 2 girls that I need to give more to already, also. I am sick of condoms.

Anyway, Percocet was the drug and it does not say to avoid alcohol, it says alcohol enhances effect, so I also got a case of beer. 12 Shiner Bock and 12 Sam Adams Octoberfest.

As soon as I got home at noon on Friday, I spent Friday and Saturday in bed drunk and Medicated. on Sunday I had 4 beers left and 4 pills. Today there is 3 pills and 1 beer, so Sunday was phasing back into reality. Today is all good, going back to work. I hope its over, but I will find out.

OK, one side note. Before the surgery, I had to go to a consultation and there were 10 guys in the meeting. One of the guys was the pastor from my church. You know the guy who told me to quit drinking light beer... Thought it was funny to see him there. He is 1 year younger than me and has 4 girls.



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  #24  
Old 09-12-2011, 08:44 AM
cj hood cj hood is offline
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

i'm flirting with the idea of getting it done...some of my buddies have. i've heard good & bad experiences about the actual process. i'm not a fan of unnecessary surgeries. still thinkin about it....



thank you Adam.

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  #25  
Old 09-13-2011, 07:19 AM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

Quote:
Originally Posted by cj hood View Post
i'm flirting with the idea of getting it done...some of my buddies have. i've heard good & bad experiences about the actual process. i'm not a fan of unnecessary surgeries. still thinkin about it....
well I am all about this ... my wife and I both, and this is the first surgery I have ever had. Seems I decided this was necessary



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  #26  
Old 09-14-2011, 11:24 PM
LongDuckDong LongDuckDong is offline
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

Myomy how the board has matured. I, too, am thinking of getting snipped. I've created the family I need and don't like the idea of my wife on hormones for forever and don't like condoms. I also don't like the idea of my wife having tubes tied, which is so much more serious than the d00d getting snipped. In the long run, ego aside, it's realistic. Just need to get the balls to make the appt.



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  #27  
Old 09-15-2011, 09:06 AM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

If you have absolutely no intention of having more children snip it.

why use condoms with your wife?

you gotta feel each other ya know what I mean?!

you'll still have an orgasm, you'll still spit shit from your dick...it just won't have any stowaways.

get your creampie on without any fears



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  #28  
Old 09-15-2011, 09:12 AM
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Default Re: Condoms vs. Getting Snipped:

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Originally Posted by kaiser soze View Post
get your creampie on without any fears
Signature worthy. Thank you.



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Last edited by hardnox71 : 09-15-2011 at 09:15 AM.
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