things to talk about on first dates

[Bob]

what kind of kiss is appropriate, anyway? no tongue i'm guessing but a short peckish thing, or one that lasts for a few seconds, or maybe even longer?

[Nuzzolese]

I think the moment, and her response, will determine that kind of thing.

[Adam]

I've been told I kiss like a girl by more than one person tho was hinted as it was a good thing - but I think that is because I'm kinda letting her lead me rather than me trying to stick my tongue down her throat.

And it has occurred to be to ask which girls they have been kissing to the answer I normally get back is "some". But anyway, you should ask her for a threesome.

What was I saying? Oh, all I meant to do was agree with Nuzz on that. You should maybe put your hand on her arse though as you do - not for too long though and don't grab - just slip down from her back and pull your hand away afterwards along her hip.

I've really upped my post-count in this thread, but that is because I've had far too many failed first dates I think. This 2nd date stuff is not really my expertise.

[Helvete]

I tried the 'can I kiss you line' once and it worked, pretty well actually. It was more of a chat up line in a club though and not on a date. I was talking to this German girl, and 'impressing' her with my German speaking skills, I was speaking to her in broken German, but then said "Hmm, what is 'kiss me' in German?', she took the hint pretty much. I still never did find out what the German for that was though.

[hpdrifter]

Yeah, let her take the lead on the type of kiss. Don't stiffen up your mouth.

My guess is it'll be a few seconds, maybe a little bit of tongue. Not porno tongue, church tongue.

[RobMoney$]

Bob, you realize this is all shit you should have learned around 8th grade, right?

[Bob]

Bob, you realize this is all shit you should have learned around 8th grade, right?

no rob, that thought had never occurred to me. thank you for being so helpful, let me go back to 8th grade and start over

[Dorothy Wood]

I say no tongue unless she goes for it. You need to make sure that your lips part a teeny bit so that her bottom lip is between your lips so there's a bit of wetness and sensuality going on. you can practice on the side of your index finger, pretend it's her bottom lip. that way you can tell if you're too wet or too suctiony, you can practice the timing, etc.



anddd, I also dislike being asked "can I kiss you?" it just makes me feel really giggly and awkward. in a bad way. my boyfriend asks me "will you kiss me?" sometimes though. which I find pretty funny and better somehow, but I still giggle. I guess it puts it on my terms or something.

[RobMoney$]

Seriously tho, what finally motivated you to make a profile on a dating site, or however you went about it.
What finally inspired you?

[b i o n i c]

i suspect the answer might have something to do with girl butts

[DipDipDive]

Bob, you realize this is all shit you should have learned around 8th grade, right?

You realize the dating world might have changed a bit since the 70's, right?

[Bob]

well i saw a burning bush in a dream, and i woke up and the heavens parted and blah blah more sarcasm nothing identifiable motivated me, i just did it one day. i've been on the site for a while now actually, maybe 2 years? i never really did much with it though, maybe a message here or there, conversations that didn't go anywhere, etc. it just kind of clicked with this girl

[Freebasser]

Keep up the good work, sir! (y)

[RobMoney$]

You realize the dating world might have changed a bit since the 70's, right?


90% of the shit people are into today is from the 70's.

[Bob]

i think for our third date i'm going to take her to a key party. that sends a pretty clear message right?

[Knuckles]

i think for our third date i'm going to take her to a key party. that sends a pretty clear message right?

This is a good idea.

Make sure to blow dry your pubes so they have some nice volume.
I might even suggest using this (http://www.wilkinsonplus.com/content/ebiz/wilkinsonplus/invt/0231983/0231983_l.jpg).

You want your man bush to be looking good when you take off your polyester slacks.

[Bob]

oh yeah so back on the kissing thing - i'm taking it then that the first kiss should be like, a real, proper kiss? not a makeout session necessarily but, you know, pretty hot? like a quick peck on the cheek or lips would be the wrong thing to do?

i can't believe i'm 25 and don't know this shit

[DipDipDive]

I've never had a first "peck." Anything worth doing is worth doing right. Start with an open-lipped kiss and feel it out...if she wants you to slip her the tongue, you'll know it.

My first kiss with my boyfriend was sexy and magical. We hugged under the streetlight on the corner outside the restaurant we had just left and he asked if he could kiss me. Started off with a nice closed lip lock, then gradually built up to full-on making out. It was hot. :o

[Bob]

I've never had a first "peck." Anything worth doing is worth doing right. Start with an open-lipped kiss and feel it out...if she wants you to slip her the tongue, you'll know it.

My first kiss with my boyfriend was sexy and magical. We hugged under the streetlight on the corner outside the restaurant we had just left and he asked if he could kiss me. Started off with a nice closed lip lock, then gradually built up to full-on making out. It was hot. :o

so for the record, most of my erection-related comments in this thread have been jokes but uh, if i manage to pull something like that off, it is acceptable for me to get a boner, right? i mean, i don't see how i couldn't. i assume she'd be flattered.

[checkyourprez]

oh yeah so back on the kissing thing - i'm taking it then that the first kiss should be like, a real, proper kiss? not a makeout session necessarily but, you know, pretty hot? like a quick peck on the cheek or lips would be the wrong thing to do?

i can't believe i'm 25 and don't know this shit


make her first kiss be on your dick.

[miss soul fire]

Being yourself (but not too much) is the best way to go. I know. I know. everybody says that.

Take a good shower and look CLEAN. Wear nice, but casual clothes.

Talk about yourself, however LISTEN to what she has to say. Ask about her life, her ambitions and all that.

If you like her and notice that she feels the same way, ask her if she would like to do another thing, like going out to another place you will both have fun, since you guys have already talked a lot before.

Just LET IT FLOW, FELLOW!:)

Hihi.:D

[miss soul fire]

what kind of kiss is appropriate, anyway? no tongue i'm guessing but a short peckish thing, or one that lasts for a few seconds, or maybe even longer?

A sweet, nice kiss, with not much tongue...and a bit longer, not a 1 second kiss.

[Bob]

make her first kiss be on your dick.

what if she doesn't want to? should i just like, shove her head down there? girls like that, right?

[checkyourprez]

what if she doesn't want to? should i just like, shove her head down there? girls like that, right?

break her off with the classic..."my dick doesnt suck itself"


gold jerry, gold.

[Bob]

haha, that's legend. thanks josep broheim tito

[Knuckles]

Don't over think the kiss Bob. Just do what feels natural and you'll be just fine.

And if that doesn't work just go ahead and shove her head in your crotch.

[Echewta]

On the second date, you should talk about the ex-Prodigy that dissed the Beastie Boys.

[miss soul fire]

Don't kiss her and don't forget to pretend you're gay. Girls dig that.

[Kid Presentable]

When you do kiss her, gently (for fuck's sake gently - do some pressure testing on your arm man) caress her lips with your tongue. Not like lapping, though. Think of it as foreshadowing. Her subconscious will. It's not like licking her mouth is what I mean, just find a second to run your tongue smooothly along her lip, top or bottom, probably not both. As part of the kiss. Not easy to explain.

[hpdrifter]

Do whatever you have to to not get a boner if/when you kiss her the first time. She won't know it's because you can't really control it and will think you are trying to let her know that you want sex right away. It's a massive massive turn off. Seriously. It will make you come off a complete douche.

Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day!

[na§tee]

ok, we all love bob but i think we are maybe being a wee bit patronising here. he's going to kiss a girl on a second date, he's not bloody becoming a jedi or something.

if you worry about it too much it'll just become this huge big deal and feel totally unnatural. which will equal unsexy and ugh. he can kiss the damn woman! he knows how to kiss someone! like dorothy said, just start slow and make sure you do the lip thing. touch her face and her neck. take it easy, holy crap. i feel like i want to buy you a drink just for putting yourself through something so apparently LABORIOUS!

it's a kiss! and a date! ENJOY IT FFS!

[rirv]

Pics or it didn't happen, Bob.

[Echewta]

Pics or it didn't happen, Bob.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QFQ-frSG5Gs (y)

[RobMoney$]

he knows how to kiss someone!


I'm not really sure this is true.
He genuinely seems like he has no idea whatsoever.

I for one, find the conflict that is Bob to be fascinating.
How can someone posess the necessary skill and intelligence it takes to graduate from law school, something few of us have,
yet have a complete lack of social skill when it comes to the opposite sex, something practically everyone has.
And you have tons of social skill on the internet Bob, everybody likes you.
It's fascinating to me that you have any problem at all socializing with girls IRL.
I mean, it's obviously just a lack of confidence. How does something like that happen?

[mickill]

I'm sure you'll figure out the kiss (don't force the tongue in, particularly if it's closed mouth), but if for you're really concerned about getting a boner while you're hugging her or whatever, you might want to consider excusing yourself towards the end of the night to "use the bathroom". In actuality, you can use the time to "relax yourself". Once you've "unloaded your pistol", you should find yourself able to perform the goodnight rituals "sans erection".

I don't know of anyone who's ever had to do this, but I'm sure it happens....all the time, I bet.

[Bob]

low self esteem

[mickill]

I'd rather be a guy with low self esteem issues, who shouldn't have those issues, than be a guy with virtually nothing to offer who thinks he's the cat's sleepwear.

[Helvete]

I'd rather be a guy with low self esteem issues, who shouldn't have those issues, than be a guy with virtually nothing to offer who thinks he's the cat's sleepwear.

Haha!

Oh, I have a shit load to offer by the way and I'm pretty successful, regardless of how much I come across as an asshole on here. I know you weren't specifically aiming that at me, but I thought I better point it out before someone tries to claim the irony of me laughing at that comment.

[NicRN77]

Like everyone else is saying...just go with the flow. If a kiss is warranted you will know.

When are you going on date #2? This weekend?

[Kid Presentable]

Haha!

Oh, I have a shit load to offer by the way and I'm pretty successful, regardless of how much I come across as an asshole on here. I know you weren't specifically aiming that at me, but I thought I better point it out before someone tries to claim the irony of me laughing at that comment.

Shut up already.

[Bob]

Like everyone else is saying...just go with the flow. If a kiss is warranted you will know.

When are you going on date #2? This weekend?

thursday. i'm not sure why i made it so late in the week, i'm getting kind of restless but that's more to do with me being generally bored and having nothing to do lately than the date (the date's not helping though). i guess i have it my head that dating is a thursday-saturday affair

[Helvete]

Shut up already.

Well you obviously thought about it and probably would have made a comment. I don't think I am amazing by the way, I had years of low self esteem, but realised how much of a difference being confident and making the best of what you do have makes.

Like I say, me: online, doesn't equal me: in the realz.

[RobMoney$]

I'd rather be a guy with low self esteem issues, who shouldn't have those issues, than be a guy with virtually nothing to offer who thinks he's the cat's sleepwear.


I wasn't trying to be disparaging towards Bob at all.
And you're right. He shouldn't have those issues. That's the point I was trying to make.
He's a witty dude, and he's got way more going for him than most of us.


Which is why I'm fascinated by his struggle.

[Bob]

i don't even know where it comes from really. it's not like i had bad parents or no friends growing up, i had a pretty cushy normal childhood. i just managed to grow up without learning how to talk to people. maybe i spent too much time on the internet, i don't know

[rirv]

Autism?

[yeahwho]

i don't even know where it comes from really. it's not like i had bad parents or no friends growing up, i had a pretty cushy normal childhood. i just managed to grow up without learning how to talk to people. maybe i spent too much time on the internet, i don't know

Social skills have always been extremely tough for me from age 13 up, I used mass alcohol to overcome shyness. Even after almost destroying my life (I'm an extreme example and a fuck up to the nth degree)

I have a huge ego with low self esteem. This makes for very awkward social situations... actually it makes for altogether avoiding them or always having an exit strategy on hand once I'm in a social situation.

Humility is where I find my equilibrium. Staying extremely humble in social situations.

[Bob]

Autism?

i hope not

*arranges change on desks into stacks*

nah i'm pretty sure i'm not autistic. i was a pretty normal kid (i don't know if it's offensive to say that but whatever), i just kind of fell off in my teenage years, and missed a few steps in the whole social development thing

[RobMoney$]

i don't even know where it comes from really. it's not like i had bad parents or no friends growing up, i had a pretty cushy normal childhood. i just managed to grow up without learning how to talk to people. maybe i spent too much time on the internet, i don't know


You're obviously the product of a pretty stable homelife.
Not that people who come from fucked up families can't earn a law degree, but it's not very common.
Also, I remember you posting about how proud your Mom was when you graduated, so I knew you came from at least a semi-normal family.
It's just interesting.


Good Luck in your future endeavors.
I hope everything works out for you.

[yeahwho]

i hope not

*arranges change on desks into stacks*

nah i'm pretty sure i'm not autistic. i was a pretty normal kid (i don't know if it's offensive to say that but whatever), i just kind of fell off in my teenage years, and missed a few steps in the whole social development thing

ass burgers?

[Bob]

ass burgers?

maybe. i dunno though. if you have that, you have it your whole life, don't you? i really do remember being a pretty normal kid (sorry to use that word again but i can't think of a better one), with friends and bike rides and sleepovers and everything else that kids do. then some time around middle school or high school i kind of went into a shell and stayed there when all the other normal kids were learning how maintain relationships with people and kiss and do it in the backseats of cars and everything else that i was supposed to learn how to do by this point in my life, i just kind of missed all those steps. nothing to do now but suck it up and learn i guess

[yeahwho]

bob, I doubt you have aspergers syndrome, you seem incredibly adept at writing on a social board, I read the book Look me in the Eye (http://www.amazon.com/Look-Me-Eye-Life-Aspergers/dp/0307395987) this past year which cleared up any thoughts I had about having those tendencies myself.

You're just genuinely shy and that is actually a very good trait in the age of celebrity, if your asking me.

[Bob]

bob, I doubt you have aspergers syndrome, you seem incredibly adept at writing on a social board, I read the book Look me in the Eye (http://www.amazon.com/Look-Me-Eye-Life-Aspergers/dp/0307395987) this past year which cleared up any thoughts I had about having those tendencies myself.

You're just genuinely shy and that is actually a very good trait in the age of celebrity, if your asking me.

not a great trait for a lawyer though. i can't believe they let me graduate

[lolkat]

sheeeit (http://sparkingclay.ytmnd.com/)

[checkyourprez]

maybe. i dunno though. if you have that, you have it your whole life, don't you? i really do remember being a pretty normal kid (sorry to use that word again but i can't think of a better one), with friends and bike rides and sleepovers and everything else that kids do. then some time around middle school or high school i kind of went into a shell and stayed there when all the other normal kids were learning how maintain relationships with people and kiss and do it in the backseats of cars and everything else that i was supposed to learn how to do by this point in my life, i just kind of missed all those steps. nothing to do now but suck it up and learn i guess

i think its pretty safe to say, bob got molested.

[b i o n i c]

so like, basically, if you get this fine lady home and past the old man, the whole board will come at once(y)

[Bob]

i think its pretty safe to say, bob got molested.

haha, child molestation joke, classic (y)

i wasn't, but seriously dude? did you really think that suggesting that i was molested as a child would be a funny thing to do? jesus man, that's horrible. what if i actually had been? i would not have been a fan of you.

[Dorothy Wood]

Not that people who come from fucked up families can't earn a law degree, but it's not very common.


ha, what? how do you know? what a weird thing to say....


oh bob, I think you just need practice with socializing. the internet has allowed you to socialize without really putting yourself out there, so you were content (ish?) with that and now you're actually trying to do stuff and that's totally great!

shy people are usually very smart and observant, with a lot of substance to offer. it's nothing to be ashamed of. I'm 30 and I just recently started being able to overcome my shyness. I still get anxious a lot, and I don't know if I'll ever be completely outgoing, but making an effort to not be so afraid in social situations is definitely worth it.

and anyway, I know two very socially awkward lawyers. it's not unheard of.

[checkyourprez]

haha, child molestation joke, classic (y)

i wasn't, but seriously dude? did you really think that suggesting that i was molested as a child would be a funny thing to do? jesus man, that's horrible. what if i actually had been? i would not have been a fan of you.


not my fault there was a 500 pound molestation gorilla in the room, someone had to bring it up. we were all thinking it.


i was saying it in the voice of Mac, from always sunny, when he says charlie got molested. so that makes its all right.

[Bob]

and anyway, I know two very socially awkward lawyers. it's not unheard of.

if you get a chance, ask them how they did it. it seems like getting a job is all about schmoozing and working connections and fuck me in the butt if i have a clue about how to do that

[Miho]

Good luck on your dates, Bob, but I wouldn't worry about messing up, it isn't the end of the world, after all, just do your best to have a nice time.

[Dorothy Wood]

if you get a chance, ask them how they did it. it seems like getting a job is all about schmoozing and working connections and fuck me in the butt if i have a clue about how to do that

hmm, well, one of them is actually unemployed...so, uh, oops, I guess he doesn't count.

the other lady got her job by doing temp work doing paperworky lawyery stuff, but not lawyering. but that led to a permanent position at a firm. she doesn't have clients or anything though, think she's just a peon for now.

she's also in a lawyer choir...not sure if that helped or not. you should look into that.

[Adam]

I know two people with aspergers and Bob, although only through a screen I know him hasn't really shown any trait I know.

I do like how we all analyse Bob's life to a point we second guess any horrific childhood events.

But I am shy as they come to. I didn't go to college and started work at 16, that forced me to socialise with older people so that probably helped me as I was always the baby in the group. When I hit around 23 I wasn't anymore and had a few years of being quite down on myself. Its just your twenty somethings - 29 now and I feel like life is kinda picking up (y)

It could be a male-middle-class-white-&-in-your-20s-syndrome

[Bob]

hmm, well, one of them is actually unemployed...so, uh, oops, I guess he doesn't count.

the other lady got her job by doing temp work doing paperworky lawyery stuff, but not lawyering. but that led to a permanent position at a firm. she doesn't have clients or anything though, think she's just a peon for now.

she's also in a lawyer choir...not sure if that helped or not. you should look into that.

well that's discouraging. my school's career services office has actually sent us recent graduates an e-mail that flat out says "temping will almost certainly not result in a full time position" and i believe it because i know lawyers who hire temps and they're not remotely interested in hiring them. as i understand it, temping will, if anything, decrease your chances of getting a proper lawyer job because you can get too comfortable with it and nobody wants to hire someone who's been doing doc review for years when you've also got all these chipper prick harvard grads applying for the job

I know two people with aspergers and Bob, although only through a screen I know him hasn't really shown any trait I know.

I do like how we all analyse Bob's life to a point we second guess any horrific childhood events.

my only guess as to why i am the way that i am is that right before i was about to start high school my parents got divorced and two fairly close relatives (an uncle and a very warm grandmother) died in a pretty short period of time. it kind of makes sense because i remember wanting to be alone a lot during that time since being with family alternatingly involved grieving and deluges of attention, which, as a teenager, i wasn't crazy about, and i remember being weird and lying to my friends about my parents being divorced for some reason, but i also remember being quiet and weird in middle school so while that stuff couldn't have helped, i don't think it triggered it either.

i bet it was just because i discovered the internet at the beginning of my formative years. probably a bad idea. good thing i didn't find out about booze until college

i am so confident and ready for this date

[Kid Presentable]

Bob man, I know my advice doesn't help. I'm not trying to be dick. The kissing thing is good if her mouth is a little open, but I'll leave it at that.

I'm pretty bad socially, but I learned how to be good. I do a good impression of someone making a good impression. You just need to think like a con-man. You're a good guy, man. You'll be right. (y)

Best thing about the second date is you got the first date over with and were good enough to make it to there. Although I never dated women, just partied with them and shit. Maybe a party is the answer. Of course, you run the risk of her getting smashed and fucking some other dude while you watch her drink. The cup with her drink in it, I mean. That's not some gang rape metaphor.

[rirv]

You can now talk to your date about how an internet message board speculated whether you have autism and how you have no real prospect of a job. (y)

No, but seriously, good luck. Once you're in the swing of things it comes naturally.

[Kid Presentable]

Chicks are pretty cool at that point. They go a bit mental once you live with them for a few years, but still cool and shit. The courtship is about the only thing I do miss, I guess. Even then, I don't really miss all the guesswork.

My missus would like you, Bob. You'd have to help out a lot with the housework, though. Is that inappropriate?

[Helvete]

What the dizzle? Bob was asking for advice about a first date, and as many people have said here even they didn't go on a date for ages, it's not exactly unusual. He goes on the date, has a good time, successful enough for a second date and things seem to be going well. Where does all the 'come and sit on my couch and tell me about your childhood' come into this? I'm sure Mr Bob is not socially deficient but perhaps took a while to get started.

Anyway, good luck once again Bob, hope it all goes well!

[RobMoney$]

Oh, I'm sorry.

Did I break some sort of internet message board rule by asking him a question instead of just replying to the thread topic?

Seriously, the shit people complain about.

[Guy Incognito]

this thread is still awesome.

i think people are just trying to give bob a bit of confidence and there are lot of good questions and friendly advice knocking about.

what bioinc said about the board. its dawned on me that there is a girl in the boston area blissfully unaware of the fact she could make loads of peoples day/break their hearts ( sorry to be negative! ). its kinda weird.

[Bob]

what bioinc said about the board. its dawned on me that there is a girl in the boston area blissfully unaware of the fact she could make loads of peoples day/break their hearts ( sorry to be negative! ). its kinda weird.

lol, so no pressure then

nah i dunno i'll just do my best to be myself and see where things go. i will also try to avoid garlicky oniony food just in case the whole kissing thing works out but i'm not going to push anything

[Bob]

oh yeah: important question. how should i handle this whole paying thing? like, i know the dude is supposed to pay, but she knows i don't have a job and i feel like i'll make her feel weird if i insist on paying for both of us. i have enough money that i can afford to do it, but i feel like it's going to be kind of an awkward thing, almost condescending even. sort of like "i know i don't have a job but please, sweetcheeks, let the man handle this, don't worry your pretty little head about it"

for the first date i paid for the first round of drinks but then she paid for the second and i wasn't really sure if i was supposed to talk her out of it? i just kind of said "are you sure?" and she said "of course" and then that was that. the waitress probably spit in my beer though, she wasn't there when i bought the first round

i kind of get the sense that she would prefer to just split it evenly, and to be honest i would too, but i'm supposed to be all chivalrous and junk, you know, the good part of the 1950s. does she expect me to do that, even if she thinks (and tells me) that she doesn't? like i don't want to be rude but i don't want to be condescending either. it's not about the money or anything, like i said, i can afford to do it and i really don't mind but i feel like she'll try to stop me and i'm not sure how hard i'm supposed to insist upon it or how i'm supposed to do it without seeming like i'm trying to show off or something.

i'm interested to hear from everybody about this but i'm mostly interested to hear what women think. or maybe effeminate gay dudes. i don't know if we have any of those (it turns out i'm not one!)

[rirv]

As long as you're prepared to pay the bill... what would be the worst situation is you are keen on going dutch and don't have the money to pay.

I think in the modern world it is fine to split a bill.

[Guy Incognito]

lol, so no pressure then

nah i dunno i'll just do my best to be myself and see where things go.

it just struck me as weird that loads of people from all over the world are trying to help this situation and she doesnt have a clue. Just be yourself and dont worry about things that havent happened yet, and dont over think shit.

oh yeah: important question. how should i handle this whole paying thing? like, i know the dude is supposed to pay, but she knows i don't have a job and i feel like i'll make her feel weird if i insist on paying for both of us. i have enough money that i can afford to do it, but i feel like it's going to be kind of an awkward thing, almost condescending even. sort of like "i know i don't have a job but please, sweetcheeks, let the man handle this, don't worry your pretty little head about it"

for the first date i paid for the first round of drinks but then she paid for the second and i wasn't really sure if i was supposed to talk her out of it? i just kind of said "are you sure?" and she said "of course" and then that was that. the waitress probably spit in my beer though, she wasn't there when i bought the first round

i kind of get the sense that she would prefer to just split it evenly, and to be honest i would too, but i'm supposed to be all chivalrous and junk, you know, the good part of the 1950s.

welll just say i can pay or we can split it if you prefer, give her the option. by "I" I mean you, I'm not paying

[Bob]

I think in the modern world it is fine to split a bill.

yeah, that's always been my impression, but i think i remember some posts in this thread telling me to pay. was that just for the first date? was it bad advice?

by "I" I mean you, I'm not paying

dammit! almost had you.

[yeahwho]

Money talk should be kept to a minimum, if she says she'll split the bill or pay for a movie ticket, then you should buy like the popcorn or a desert after dinner...

Even if you have the money it's usually cool to be cooperative if someone wants to help out, asking if "Are you sure" was cool and if she says yes then it's cool.

Expediting all transactions shows maturity and a mutual cooperation that will come in handy later when you unhook that bra.

[Guy Incognito]

dammit! almost had you.

you bloody nearly did - edited that post twice before thinking "hang on, he's gonna ask me to write a cheque if he reads that". it would bounce anyhoo.

EDIT - is it right to put thoughts in quotation? i have no idea

[Guy Incognito]

Expediting all transactions shows maturity and a mutual cooperation that will come in handy later when you unhook that bra.

:D(y)

[RobMoney$]

You asked her out, right?
The obligation to pay lies with you.
If she offers to contribute to the bill, don't be too proud to let her.

You don't want to set yourself up as someone who'll be paying for all future entertainment expenses if you can't afford to do it at this point.

[Dorothy Wood]

everybody likes free stuff, so I don't think she'd be upset if you offered to pay for dinner. she already paid for some drinks, so you know that she isn't opposed to paying a portion of the tab.

ideal situation

you: *reach for the check when it comes and scan it over*

her: "how much do I owe?"

you: "oh, nothing, I'll get this one."

her: "are you sure?"

you: "yeah, thanks for offering though."

her: "at least let me get the tip."

you: "ohh alright, if you insist." *smile*

then she'll like give you 5-10 bucks and still think you're a pretty classy dude.

alternatively, if you plan to hang out after dinner for drinks or something, say "how about you buy a round later?" instead of letting her pay the tip.


And, if somehow she turns out to be a jerk or something and you're not having fun, then just let her pay her portion and be done with it.

Offering to pay for a lady lets them know that you like them romantically, as stupid as it is. and if she is very insistent on paying her portion, it may mean that she's just not that into you. however, you youngsters today might have a different way of doing things.

if she doesn't say, "how much do I owe?" then...I dunno. if she also doesn't say "thank you" or anything, then that means she's a bad person and you should stop hanging out with her. maybe bang her if she's up for it, but she's bound to be trouble. fair warning.

[Bob]

and if she is very insistent on paying her portion, it may mean that she's just not that into you.

oh what the hell? why would you put this thought in my head?

[Dorothy Wood]

oh what the hell? why would you put this thought in my head?

sorry! I'm just saying, that's like code. or it is for old people like me. it's not definitive though! she might just be nice and considering your joblessness if she insists.

you'll be able to tell if she likes you by then anyway. if you can't then she's a weirdo.

[cosmo105]

I often offer to pay or at least make an effort to split it, even on the first date. It is *nice* when dude insists on covering it, but I've dated guys that were unemployed and understood totally. As long as she knows you're working on getting a job and you stick to things that aren't mega extravagant it shouldn't be an issue. Try to pay as much as you can, because unfortunately that's just what's expected a lot of the time, but after the first date if she offers to help cover some and really seems into it, let her. It shouldn't be a huge deal. If it is to her, meh. Not worth it anyway.

[miss soul fire]

Do the opposite you usually do. It worked for George Costanza!(y)

[jackrock]

Ask her what she thinks of this (http://www.nationalpost.com/news/story.html?id=2155193).

[Dorothy Wood]

Ask her what she thinks of this (http://www.nationalpost.com/news/story.html?id=2155193).


I think it's terrible, yet hilarious.

[b i o n i c]

That's when the young woman inexplicably kicked him in the groin hard enough to send one of his testicles into his abdomen.

Mr. Clark said he wasn't aware of the severity of his injury until later that night when he "noticed something was missing."...

It wasn't until he woke up afterwards that he discovered the doctors were wrong - the force of the assault had caused his testicle to rupture. It had to be removed and will be replaced by a prosthetic before Christmas.

no thats just plain hillarious(y)

[mickill]

You found that "just plain hillarious(y)"?

What are you, nine? At least Dorothy Wood doesn't have male reproductive organs, and therefore can't necessarily know for certain how much it would suck to have a nut kicked up into your stomach, only to have it rupture and die there. Do you have male reproductive organs, bionic?

[b i o n i c]

i dont care, balls kicked into abdomen is funny

[b i o n i c]

its also funny that he's getting new balls for christmas. balls are funny

[Bob]

i dont care, balls kicked into abdomen is funny

that is objectively the opposite of funny dude

it's about as funny as an involuntary mastectomy

[b i o n i c]

id objectively laugh pretty hard if it was you who got his balls kicked into his abdomen. objectively.

[mickill]

You should have your right to own a dick revoked for the comments you've made in this thread, bionic. Assuming that step would be necessary.

[b i o n i c]

do you two wear bonnets when you watch americas funniest home videos? afv as the kids call it nowadays

[Bob]

id objectively laugh pretty hard if it was you who got his balls kicked into his abdomen. objectively.

really? like if i posted a thread that was like "subject: i don't even know how to describe the pain i'm in; body: i was walking down the street and a woman kicked me in the balls. the doctor says they're in my abdomen. i'm useless to a woman now, not that it matters. i literally want to kill myself, you have no idea the pain i'm in"

you'd find that funny

think about your words bro

[Helvete]

As nice a guy as I am, I'd surely injure that ball-kicker woman terribly if she tried or did that to me.

[b i o n i c]

i said objectively! id rather not subjectively discuss balls right now

[Bob]

i said objectively! id rather not subjectively discuss balls right now

you keep using that word. i do not think it means what you think it means.

[b i o n i c]

dont come to me with your lawyery mumbojabumbo.. you cant have your torts and eat them too

[mickill]

I think bionic just has no dick.

[b i o n i c]

I think bionic just has no dick.

stop thinking about my dick already

[mickill]

I just feel sorry for you. For having no dick.

[b i o n i c]

I just feel sorry for you. For having no dick.

i really appreciate that you wish i had a penis. im starting to wonder why its so important to you that i have one. its ok though, really(y)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_A4ENwFVjL0

[mickill]

i really appreciate that you wish i had a penis. im starting to wonder why its so important to you that i have one. its ok though, really(y)

Good one.

[Adam]

On topic: I think most women are happy to go dutch but I think you should always be the first to offer to pay and try and make your split a little higher with a treat, like dessert or something.

Or you could bring a calculator with you and have the bill exact each - that'd show her that you are always prepared.

Or if you have an iphone you could get that app that helps you split the bill and then go on and on and on about how great the phone is while not being able to afford the bills it creates. Then she might pay for it all but its ok, cus you have an iphone (y)

[b i o n i c]

she'll think


bring a calculator with you and have the bill exact each - that'd show her that you are always prepared.
"cheap bastard!"

Or if you have an iphone you could get that app that helps you split the bill and then go on and on and on about how great the phone is while not being able to afford the bills it creates. Then she might pay for it all but its ok, cus you have an iphone (y)
"reeeealllly fucking calculating, conniving, cheap bastard!"

or like if he pays more than his share, itll be all like "oh now that obnoxious shit expects some ass" (which is exactly how i imagine she'd say it to herself)

you cant win! maybe just let her treat you to be safe

[Adam]

you're right - he can't win. Maybe the best option is take the money you was gonna spend on the date and shove it down her top like a cheap stripper when you see her. Then tell her we can do whatever you want us to do and you can keep the change. Then you can gauge how much she thinks you're worth from how much activity you do (or not).

Plus she might get turned on being treated mean (to keep 'em keen).

[miss soul fire]

Eating her food and making her pay is better.
Just tell her "Oh, no! I forgot my wallet! I feel ashamed!" and don't forget the puppy eyes!:)

[Nuzzolese]

Eating her food and making her pay is better.
Just tell her "Oh, no! I forgot my wallet! I feel ashamed!" and don't forget the puppy eyes!:)

Listen to this woman, Bob. (y)

[Bob]

so second date's done and uhhhhh i think this might be going somewhere. we went out to dinner (i paid, she offered to help, i said "oh no i've got this" and that was that), then for a beer afterwards (she paid for that, i bet i looked bad in front of the bartender again but he didn't know about dinner so screw him) and we laughed and talked and smiled and yeah she seems to like me for some reason. i was still pretty nervous and i kept forgetting what to say and i'd occasionally jumble my sentences but she didn't seem to mind, she was listening and smiling and laughing and i definitely saw her playing with her hair and i'm pretty sure i noticed a lip bite or two. the places we went to were much quieter than the first date so she definitely could hear what i was saying, no benefit of the doubt points on this one, it was all me

afterwards i walked her back to the subway and i was kind of getting the impression that she wanted me to kiss her but i wasn't really sure so i compromised and when we hugged goodbye i stroked her hair a little and got out of there. i guess my natural nervousness took over. definitely will have to kiss her next time

anyway she asked me to call her so i'll be doing that. maybe i'll make a date a little sooner than i did last time, calling her on sunday and then waiting until thursday got a little weird for me

god she's cute. i wonder why she likes me. i hope she doesn't realize she could do better.

[Bob]

i can't wait till we get to the point where i don't blog about every date and phone call

[mickill]

When a girl bites her lip, it means she's trying to hold back from doing or saying something. Either way, take it as a good sign.

The hair-stroking was a nice touch. Good going, champ.

[Echewta]

Nice Bob. :)

Stop saying you aren't worth it. When you realize you are worth the best, you will be much more confident and comfortable in front of someone.

Ever think that she deserves a cool guy? Wouldn't you be pissed if she was a girl that dated the douche bags?

[b i o n i c]

nice goin! make sure you go out close to your place next time(y)

[Bob]

nice goin! make sure you go out close to your place next time(y)

actually this place was near my home. come to think of it after dinner she mentioned something about getting coffee and it hadn't occurred to me that coffee = doing it so i quite cluelessly said "hmm i'm not really too familiar with the coffee shops around here, i usually just make my own" which would have been an ideal thing to say in advance of "i suppose having it at my place would be too weird ah ha ha ha" and gauging her reaction but it didn't occur to me to do that at the time. instead we went to a bar, where coffee was not being served. maybe she was hinting. maybe not. i don't know. you had to be there.

anyway it's just as well. when i got home my roommate was in the living room with a dude i haven't met before and i'm pretty sure i smelled pot which i haven't smelled before in my home. not really cool. she was giving me a look that said "i hate you, go away" but i literally have no idea why, it was all pretty unprecedented. i was just getting a glass of water! that actually would have been weird, not an ideal coffee drinking environment

i'm actually kind of hoping she invites me to her place; she lives alone, and i have three roommates, one of whom apparently hates me :confused:. also i don't have a box spring for my bed because i couldn't fit it up the stairs. i've been meaning to get one but i just haven't got around to it

honestly though i would almost kind of prefer to take it slow. i don't think she needs to discover how bad i am at sex just yet

[b i o n i c]

im not saying you need to get naked right away, but you cant really properly make out or snuggle or thumb wrestle on the sidewalk.

you should definately aim for her apartment.. she might do that "im gonna go slip into something more comfortable" thing they do on tv

and if that happens, just remember.. don't think about erections.

[Ty Webb]

i'm going to slip into something more nudity

[Adam]

I dunno the etiquette of telling a girl how bad at sex you are - you might be great. You've seen porn yeah? So probably taking out 90% of the most freaky bits in most porn and then stick to the 10% that seems more normal and you should be fine - like offer to fix her cable or unplug her drains.

You're right about going round to hers though, she'll probably feel more comfortable there and since you have unpredictable housemates, you'll probably feel more comfortable to.

Next time choose a place nearer to hers, make it seem more by accident to and you may end up back there. Going to hers doesn't mean sex either, could just be 'heavy petting'.

Have you googled her name? Checked for anything you might need to know - like crazy ex's on her face-crack page etc?

[b i o n i c]

Going to hers doesn't mean sex either, could just be 'heavy petting'.

pfffhahahah

[Guy Incognito]

i can't wait till we get to the point where i don't blog about every date and phone call

what and miss out on such thread title clasics as "things to talk about whilst getting a blow job" or "things talk about when we have had a massive row" or summat?

sounds like it went well (y)and the coffee thing sounds like it might have been an opportunity but its no bad thing that you didnt pick up on it. its probably increased her cute rating of you plus it keeps her quite keen i suppose.
her place sounds like the better venue dude. and dont worry about telling her about lack of experience. cross that bridge when you come to it. no pun intended.

did you tell her about passing? how did that go?

[Freebasser]

i wonder why she likes me. i hope she doesn't realize she could do better.

Stop saying that shit. You are a bloody top bloke, Bob.

Sounds like it's going well too - so just relax (y)

[mickill]

what and miss out on such thread title clasics as "things to talk about whilst getting a blow job" or "things talk about when we have had a massive row" or summat?

I don't think Bob really talks like that.

[Helvete]

Nice work, Bob. I would say the hard bit is over, but I guess there's the possibility of sex...

Cross that bridge when you come to it, I wish you every success with this girl!

[Guy Incognito]

I don't think Bob really talks like that.

it was an attempt at humour big lad.

[Nuzzolese]

god she's cute.

This is so exciting! I know why she would like you, or at least I have some idea. So does everyone else here who's gotten some sort of impression of who you are from your posts. You have so much going for you, I wish you could see it.

Also, I think it's great that you haven't kissed her yet. It's better when anticipation has been built up and she's had some time to really want you to kiss her, time to think about what it would be like if you kissed her. There's no need to rush through all the fun, day-dreaming, heart-fluttering beginning moments of this.

[Dorothy Wood]

fuck yeah dude! way to go! (y)

[NicRN77]

Woo hoo!!! (y)

[nodanaonlyzuul]

everything sounds great thus far. You are a good guy, Bob. Just remember that.

[rirv]

Kissing and sex are a lot easier than they are made out to be. You spend your youth building it up like it's a skill that only true players can pull off, but humans have been doing it for many millenia. As long as you don't do anything weird. Definitely don't stick your finger in her arse unless you're picking up some kinky vibes.

[checkyourprez]

Kissing and sex are a lot easier than they are made out to be. You spend your youth building it up like it's a skill that only true players can pull off, but humans have been doing it for many millenia. As long as you don't do anything weird. Definitely don't stick your finger in her arse unless you're picking up some kinky vibes.

it never hurts to try.

[RobMoney$]

and dont worry about telling her about lack of experience. cross that bridge when you come to it.


Not that I would know anything about telling girls about being a virgin,
BUT...


I'm gonna go out on a limb and agree with Incognito. Don't worry about admitting your lack of experience.
It's actually a huge asset for you if you really think this girl is relationship material.
I mean who doesn't want to be with a virgin?

[hpdrifter]

I liked you a lot when I first started posting here, Bob. But then I found out you're like 8 years younger than me and I met an IRL man and that was that.

You're the bees knees buddy. Fuckin own it already.

[p-branez]

bob, you shouldn't be worried about what you talk about, there's more than just what you say. it's about how you say it. having talking topics is pretty canned.

[miss soul fire]

You're lucky and you don't even know about it.

[Guy Incognito]

I'm gonna go out on a limb and agree with Incognito. Don't worry about admitting your lack of experience.


why thank you rob, i think.

Bob, if this girl has a bit of experience and things do start to happen she may pick up on it anyway and she'll probably let you know if you are doing something really wrong. dont sweat it.
it'll all add to your charm like the possible not picking up on the coffee line, its endearing. she'll probably think its cool that you arent appearing to be thinking about sex all the time. but obviously at some point you will have to pick up on the signals otherwise it could be curtains.

I was 19 when i lost my virginity and i didnt say anything till a few days after. well i didnt really do that i tried to bring the subject up and she said she had already realised, not cos i was rubbish or anything:rolleyes: probably more to do with the fact i still had a massive grin on my face.

[Adam]

I didn't tell the first girl I was with I was a virgin - kinda still in contact with her and still haven't told her. Since this was over 10 years ago I doubt I will but I wonder if she knew. And I know she had plenty of experience tho (y)

[mikizee]

Me and my mates used to tell girls we were talking to at bars we were virgins just for a laugh, and in 95% of cases their eyes would light up and they would say 'really?' all excited like.

So bob don't be afraid to admit your lack of experience.

[b i o n i c]

^ thats the best.. before you lay the smackdown

[hpdrifter]

I've never been into the idea but... well whatever.

Guys, if it were the other way round, would you be into it?

[Echewta]

hahaha, "into it."

[hpdrifter]

oh for cryin out loud, just answer the question.

[NicRN77]

If a guy I was dating told me he was a virgin I think I'd be a little scared. Like wondering WHY he hasn't had sex yet. What's wrong with him?

[hpdrifter]

I met a guy once that I subsequently found out was a virgin. He was 22, I think I was 21 or 22. He was in the military and he was cute and stuff. But I guess I just wasn't feeling the whole virgin thing. Probably because at that point I think I'd only slept with one person so I figured it'd be a little like the blind leading the the blind.

[Dorothy Wood]

Bob's not a virgin.

and anyway, I don't think I'd be turned off or on by the idea of sleeping with a virgin. I guess I might have trouble starting a relationship or something, because I'd be afraid that the guy would think he was missing out on his oats sewing.

[Echewta]

oh for cryin out loud, just answer the question.

Besides being more understanding and patient, I wouldn't have a problem sleeping with someone in that situation.

[Guy Incognito]

Besides being more understanding and patient, I wouldn't have a problem sleeping with someone in that situation.

yeah same here,but i think i would feel a little weird finding out afterwards, i would prefer to know before hand

[Echewta]

You would use your hand differently?

[Guy Incognito]

You would use your hand differently?

LOL if i am doing that then its hands;)

[RobMoney$]

Guys, if it were the other way round, would you be into it?


LOLZ, it's only like every guys' fantasy.

Islamic extremists commit acts of terror and suicide for the promise of 70 virgins in the afterlife.

[rirv]

I've never been into the idea but... well whatever.

Guys, if it were the other way round, would you be into it?

Tbh, I reckon it would be pretty awful sleeping with a virgin.

They'd be young, which at my age now is starting to get a little bit creepy.
OR
They were waiting for that "special someone" so are probably highly emotional and would cry afterwards.
OR
There was another reason they were a virgin, like they smelled bad or were a psychopath or were morbidly obese.
AND
To top it off they'd probably lie there like a log and pull a pained expression during the whole ordeal.

(n)

[hpdrifter]

Apparently not every guy.

[yeahwho]

I don't think I could sleep with a virgin, but I could sleep with a girl from the Virgin Islands.

[rirv]

This discussion is virgin on the ridiculous.

[lolkat]

robmoney$ u sick fuck

[hpdrifter]

I think rirv just killed this thread.

[rirv]

:cool:As long as we don't kill Bob's boner.:cool:

Imagine getting cockblocked by the internet.

[yeahwho]

...or maybe a girl from Virginia, as long as she has a vagina. Maybe a girl with a vagina from West Virginia.

[Echewta]

Why do girls cry after sex? I've never had that happen unless Im wearing my boxers with onions on them. You can never be to careful about vampires, including during the sexing.

[rirv]

...or maybe a girl from Virginia, as long as she has a vagina. Maybe a girl with a vagina from West Virginia.
WHAT'S HER NAME? VIRGINIA PLAIN. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_zoi6O-cq9I)

[yeahwho]

:cool:As long as we don't kill Bob's boner.:cool:

Imagine getting cockblocked by the internet.

All bob has to do to keep from having pre-mature ejaculation during his first sexual encounter with this date is reflect back on this thread...

but you're probably right if he thinks about it beforehand he may be unable to perform.

[yeahwho]

LOLZ, it's only like every guys' fantasy.

Islamic extremists commit acts of terror and suicide for the promise of 70 virgins in the afterlife.

robmoney$ u sick fuck

yeah Rob, you must really like the extra extra virgin olive oil

[Myu-to]

Bob's not a virgin.

And how do you know this?

[hpdrifter]

So what happened to the play by play? Has date number three happened? Was there a kiss? Sexy time? Bob has not provided an update in days! :mad:

[Adam]

So what happened to the play by play? Has date number three happened? Was there a kiss? Sexy time? Bob has not provided an update in days! :mad:

Like any new relationship, what do you do for the first few weeks? Fuck all the time! So I think we can assume that is what is going off.

When any1 disappears from this board unexpectedly its either; new romance, new job, drafted or jail. I doubt its the last two but the first two are a possibility (y)

[Dorothy Wood]

And how do you know this?

I raped him. :(

[Bob]

So what happened to the play by play? Has date number three happened? Was there a kiss? Sexy time? Bob has not provided an update in days! :mad:

nothing new yet. i called her sunday, we talked for 15 minutes about friendly chatty things and made a date for wednesday

but there is something that's bothering me, and it's stupid and it's hopefully nothing but all the same i can't get it out of my head and it's just sort of picking at it. some time between when i called her sunday and now, she updated her okcupid profile with stuff that to me makes it sound like she's trying to get more dudes to message her. she changed the "six things i could never live without" section to list six things she could never do without in a man (and i meet like 5 out of 6 but still, that wasn't there before) and the "you should message me if" section to say "no 'if', it's a dating website, no pressure", and i'm well sure that wasn't there before

it's stupid and also the internet and i feel like a lameo for dwelling on it but all the same it is bugging me a little. maybe it doesn't mean anything. or maybe it means she's dating other dudes at the same time. or wants to. maybe that's how dating works, i guess i hadn't thought about it that hard. that's annoying, if true, it's starting to feel more like a callback interview than a date

[Adam]

she ain't yours yet.

Let it go, don't dwell - just you may have to work a little harder. I know dudes here will say they bone every girl on the first date but it'll take as many dates as it takes and it'll be a natural progression. If she doesn't want to see you she'll stop making arrangements with you. Or make them and not turn up - no sign of that yet so all good (y)

[Bob]

she ain't yours yet.

Let it go, don't dwell - just you may have to work a little harder. I know dudes here will say they bone every girl on the first date but it'll take as many dates as it takes and it'll be a natural progression. If she doesn't want to see you she'll stop making arrangements with you. Or make them and not turn up - no sign of that yet so all good (y)

yeah i reckon that's true. i just hadn't thought to think very hard about it until now

[Guy Incognito]

yep, what adam said, just be yourself, try hard but dont try too hard , sounds like you should just do what you have been doing, its working, dont let any conspiracy theories you have influence you, just forget about all that.

[Bob]

yep, what adam said, just be yourself, try hard but dont try too hard , sounds like you should just do what you have been doing, its working, dont let any conspiracy theories you have influence you, just forget about all that.

yeah i kind of wish i'd never noticed it honestly. well, more that i wish she'd never wrote it but i'd have settled for not noticing it. oh well, whatever i was doing before seems to have been working so i'll just keep doing it

[Guy Incognito]

yeah i kind of wish i'd never noticed it honestly. well, more that i wish she'd never wrote it but i'd have settled for not noticing it. oh well, whatever i was doing before seems to have been working so i'll just keep doing it

dude, dont worry about she might have meant by it, you could spend all your life with this woman and there will be many times you wont be entirely sure what she means. If there is an issue you will find out about it so dont sweat it.

[Adam]

I also think in the 'courting stage' its good think healthy about keeping options open. The more girls you get in your life, the even more girls you get in your life. Just need to get with the rhythm of talking and taking out those that you fancy and it'll happen with the right one. This is the easy part, next is commitment and the rules. But that'll be another chapter (I hope)

[NicRN77]

What are you doing for date #3?

[Bob]

i was thinking improv boston? there's a show that looks good

[Guy Incognito]

i was thinking improv boston? there's a show that looks good

obviously you are big enough to make your own decisions about this kind of thing but wont that mean you two just sitting there, watching something, obviously there will some interaction but what about doing something where you actually do something together. i'm not sure what though. tell me to cock off bob if you like, i just thought it was a bit early for just going somewhere together. have you spoke with her about what you are gonna do at all?

[NicRN77]

i was thinking improv boston? there's a show that looks good

Cool! I had a date once at the Improv Asylum on Hanover and it was a great first date. I actually went there again with a friend this weekend. Hilarious!

[hpdrifter]

See that's what I mean, that's something I would enjoy but almost never do.

Probably not that expensive either.

[Bob]

ok so that's 2 for and one against. and the 2 for are women. one of whom lives here

so.....good idea...? i had thought about the whole "it's just sitting and watching" thing but i don't know we both like comedy and they have a full bar and we've already done a bar and a restaurant (followed by another bar) and it was fun but i feel like i should think of something different

[yeahwho]

It will be even cooler if you heckle the comedian, even if he's hilarious do an obligatory loud yawn and one shout out of "Boring".

Tell her that guy is bullshit, I'm way funnier.

Spill your drink.

Pee your pants.


your welcome in advance bob

[NicRN77]

I think the Improv thing is fabulous! They get the audience involved so it won't be like you're just sitting there. I really say go for this idea. Did you mention it to her already? Did she seem keen on the idea?

Tomorrow night I'm going to see this lecture on jazz and genes at the Museum of Science...but that might totally bore your date!

[Guy Incognito]

ok so that's 2 for and one against. and the 2 for are women. one of whom lives here

so.....good idea...? i had thought about the whole "it's just sitting and watching" thing but i don't know we both like comedy and they have a full bar and we've already done a bar and a restaurant (followed by another bar) and it was fun but i feel like i should think of something different

I think the Improv thing is fabulous! They get the audience involved so it won't be like you're just sitting there. I really say go for this idea. Did you mention it to her already? Did she seem keen on the idea?



well that does sound a bit better than i thought. i was just worried you hadnt considered the sitting there thing and you had, should have given you more credit robert. Like you said Nic is local and thats probly best recommendation, i still would advise running it by the girl first and have a backup option ready.

[RobMoney$]

Yeah, I'm sure she'd be much happier just hanging at your place playing "Scene it" with you and your passive-aggressive roommates.


Do the Comedy Show, you can always go for beers after if you think there wasn't enough interaction.

[yeahwho]

Tomorrow night I'm going to see this lecture on jazz and genes at the Museum of Science...but that might totally bore your date!

Wow what a coinkydink, bob is going to have a lecture on jizz in his jeans tomorrow night

[Bob]

I think the Improv thing is fabulous! They get the audience involved so it won't be like you're just sitting there. I really say go for this idea. Did you mention it to her already? Did she seem keen on the idea?


nah i hadn't thought of an idea when i called her on sunday, i'm gonna run it by her tonight and hope she likes it because if she doesn't i still haven't thought of a backup

i've lived here for over 3 years now and i still don't know where anything is, it's kind of nerve wracking honestly

[rirv]

Regardless of the lack of interaction, comedy shows are great to take women too. She will be laughing and happy and will associate the laughter and happiness with going on a date with you. Then you can talk about the comedy show over some beers, recite one of the funny jokes, she'll laugh, you touch her knee, she smiles at you and you kiss.

[Guy Incognito]

nah i hadn't thought of an idea when i called her on sunday, i'm gonna run it by her tonight and hope she likes it because if she doesn't i still haven't thought of a backup

i've lived here for over 3 years now and i still don't know where anything is, it's kind of nerve wracking honestly

is it a rule that you have to come up with the ideas, she might have a good suggestion.

i dunno, is asking the girl what she wants to a third date no-no?

[Bob]

is it a rule that you have to come up with the ideas, she might have a good suggestion.

i dunno, is asking the girl what she wants to a third date no-no?

honestly i was kind of hoping that she'd have something in mind because i made the plans last time and i was hoping it would be one of those "now it's your turn" kind of things but apparently it doesn't work that way, i need to be a man or something. i'm not used to that, it's too weird

[Guy Incognito]

honestly i was kind of hoping that she'd have something in mind because i made the plans last time and i was hoping it would be one of those "now it's your turn" kind of things but apparently it doesn't work that way, i need to be a man or something. i'm not used to that, it's too weird

well try and think of a back up , dont bombard the girl with ideas tho, that might freak her out. i still think you should put the ball in her court, you never know she might say lets get bollocksed and then go back to mine (thats hers not mine ,you might wake my kids up). i doubt she would say that though.

this thread is still brilliant even though i have posted too much in it.

[NicRN77]

is it a rule that you have to come up with the ideas, she might have a good suggestion.

i dunno, is asking the girl what she wants to a third date no-no?

This is exactly what I was going to ask. I'm a take-charge kind of girl and would make a suggestion. I always feel like the first date is kinda the guy's responsibility but future dates anyone should throw out ideas.

I've also been to a date at the MFA http://mfa.org/ I think its a good date place because you can walk around and make fun of the art. You could take her across the street after for a beer here http://squealingpigboston.com/ or just up the street there's great pizza and huge selection of beers here http://www.thepenguinpizza.com/

[Guy Incognito]

honestly i was kind of hoping that she'd have something in mind because i made the plans last time and i was hoping it would be one of those "now it's your turn" kind of things but apparently it doesn't work that way, i need to be a man or something. i'm not used to that, it's too weird

This is exactly what I was going to ask. I'm a take-charge kind of girl and would make a suggestion. I always feel like the first date is kinda the guy's responsibility but future dates anyone should throw out ideas.



bob who actually said you need to be a man about this. if it was her then fine you suggest the place but she might be thinking "hey i wanted to go here or do this".

[b i o n i c]

suggest a couple of things (think!) ask her for a coupla things she might be in the mood for

[Bob]

she was very excited about the idea! and we're getting dinner beforehand and she picked the place since it's in her neighborhood and i don't know anything in it (it almost sounded like she had it picked out in advance or something) so that's cool

so yeah she appears to still like me, i was just being neurotic. i think i am going to just go ahead and never look at her profile ever again, no good can come of that

[Documad]

Never tell her about this place. You've never even heard of the beastie boys.

[Bob]

but what if she asks me what i do with my free time? i'll have no answer!

yeah obviously i'm not telling her about this place. my favorite band is radiohead. i spend my free time blogging about radiohead. no you cannot read my blogs about radiohead

[lolkat]

dick wellington
(http://www.facebook.com/profile/pic.php?uid=AAAAAQAQFM1dQry68SNSS6gJ8qFeZgAAAAnFS_ hrnze75SQeiPqfw-QS)

[b i o n i c]

no, you're "not into" and dont "get" internet "blogging" and "stuff"

[yeahwho]

I always get instantly happy when somebody brings up the Beastie Boys....

I mean are they from like New York or something?

[ms.peachy]

I just want you all to know I am printing this out and using it nearly verbatim for dialogue for my first novel. When the rights are optioned to Hollywood, who do you see playing you in the film?

[Bob]

anyone but shia lebouef. maybe a culkin

[insertnamehere]

dimitri martin

[mickill]

I've always seen Don Cheadle playing the role of Bob in the BBMB movie.

[insertnamehere]

fuck don cheadle. terrence howard all the way.

[yeahwho]

Don Knott's and Bob is to plain, we'll change Bobs character into Luther Higgs.
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=inDf6-TUq5s&NR=1)

[mickill]

I'm not implying that anyone here needs to see Get Rich Or Die Tryin (http://www.celebritywonder.com/mp/2005_Get_Rich_or_Die_Tryin%27/movieposter.jpg) if they haven't already (I'm a Jim Sheridan completist), but during the 5 minute prison shower fight, you can clearly see that Terence Howard has an infant's thumb for a penis. I'm not saying this has any bearing on his acting ability, but it just wasn't a high point in his career.

[Praying Mantis]

Have fun tonight Bob. Be yourself and let the date unravel on its on. The more you try to work the date the worse its going to be. Improv was a great idea. You can do this. Good luck

Go Phillies.

[hpdrifter]

I think Emanuelle Chriqui or Shiri Appleby could pull me off.

[mickill]

I think Emanuelle Chriqui or Shiri Appleby could pull me off.
If I wasn't married, I'd take some of that action.

The improv thing sounds like a great idea btw. Might raise the bar for bringing the funny though, Bob.

[Bob]

I think Emanuelle Chriqui or Shiri Appleby could pull me off.

they could pull me off as well if you know what i mean ;) ;) ;)

[Guy Incognito]

they could pull me off as well if you know what i mean ;) ;) ;)

dammit, i was in process of checking who those ladies were before cracking that same gag. so all i will say about those girls is aye carumba.

good luck at the improv bob (y)

[hpdrifter]

Yeah, I'm overshooting it a bit but hey, it's fantasy land, right?

Do something with that there you three.

[Guy Incognito]

Yeah, I'm overshooting it a bit but hey, it's fantasy land, right?

Do something with that there you three.

cant think of anything unobvious apart from a rant about actually being the mayor of fantasy land which wasnt going anywhere, and bob should be saving his funny for his date. mickill'll probably think of something. i dont know what i just wanted to write "mickill'll".

[NicRN77]

(y) Best of luck tonight on date #3!

[mickill]

they could pull me off as well if you know what i mean ;) ;) ;)
Late!

[mickill]

dammit, i was in process of checking who those ladies were before cracking that same gag. so all i will say about those girls is aye carumba.

Late!

[mickill]

Yeah, I'm overshooting it a bit but hey, it's fantasy land, right?

Do something with that there you three.

I'm drawing a blank.

[Guy Incognito]

I'm drawing a blank.

hahaha(y) good work sir

hang on i'm sure that just said blanks - cheeky edit from mickill

[mickill]

hahaha(y) good work sir

hang on i'm sure that just said blanks - cheeky edit from mickill

It was premature.

[Guy Incognito]

It was premature.

:D:D:D

[Bob]

so, yeah, third date went well and if i had any lingering doubts about whether or not she liked me i do not any more, i'm pretty sure she does. i'm sure some of you are wondering so i'll just say it up front, no sex or sex-related stuff, not this time but i think it's probably only a matter of time now. and i know that makes me sound like i'm only doing this because i want to have sex with her but that's not true, i actually do quite like her as a person, not just a vagina-carrying device, i'm just saying, i bet that happens soonish. and honestly i'm almost kind of relieved that it didn't this time because like i said before i'm pretty bad at the whole thing so i'm honestly a little nervous about it, i don't know how much patience she's going to have, or how experienced she is (i haven't asked but she's kind of dorky at times and sometimes i get the feeling that she doesn't know she's hot which is a combination i'm perfectly content with). i like this girl, i don't want to bore her away. so to speak.

anyway yeah we went to dinner first at an indian restaurant (i had chicken tikka masala, thanks BBMB). i paid and she let me but i got the sense that she felt weird about it, i think i'll give in and let her split it with me next time (BECAUSE I AM A MAN AND THAT IS MY PREROGATIVE apparently). then we went to the show and sadly it kind of sucked, more on that later, but that was ok, we both laughed about how much it sucked. also she held my hand about halfway through so that was nice, i liked that

then we went to a bar for a beer and it was kind of awkward because it was sort of a sports bar and neither of us realized the world series was on (i'm so relieved that neither of us give a shit about sports, i was worried she'd find that lame but nope, it's common ground) and there was lots of shouting while we were trying to talk but overall a good time. lots of talking and laughing. that seems to be a theme

then we walked back to the T stop to say goodbye and i kissed her. i liked that too (as did she, more importantly). i don't know how much detail i want to get into here but it was definitely a "let's do this again some time when strangers aren't watching" kind of kiss so yeah, i'll be calling her soon

so yeah! i'm basically pretty happy here

so yeah

[Bob]

i am kind of disappointed that the show sucked though. the star was jonathan katz, who you probably recognize as a squiggly cartoon from dr. katz, professional therapist. i remember liking that show when it was on and i remember jonathan katz being a funny comedian outside of it but the show tonight...eh. i mean he was funny, in his sort of subtle and deadpan kind of way (ie, "i hate going to funerals because i'm not a morning person" and "child pornographers are horrible people - they should be tried as adults"), but the format of the show was that it was basically a talk show where he would have comedians come on as guests and he would talk to them about...well, like a talk show, like an interview you'd see on conan or something. and unfortunately they just weren't very good and the dynamic between them and katz was also just not really there.

there was also a musical guest who wasn't very funny. he did one song that was kind of cute, about thanking his ex-girlfriends for breaking his heart in the past so that he could eventually end up with the woman he loves now, but then he did another song which was just not funny at all, it was basically like "all religions should live in peace" and there weren't any jokes and we were kind of exchanging awkward glances. there was a part where he asked the audience to sing the chorus and nobody really did and then the song ended and it was all just kind of downhill from there

i'm assured that the shows are usually much better though so we're determined to go back sometime.

[Dorothy Wood]

nice! (y)(y)(y)

[Dorothy Wood]

i am kind of disappointed that the show sucked though. the star was jonathan katz, who you probably recognize as a squiggly cartoon from dr. katz, professional therapist. i remember liking that show when it was on and i remember jonathan katz being a funny comedian outside of it but the show tonight...eh. i mean he was funny, in his sort of subtle and deadpan kind of way (ie, "i hate going to funerals because i'm not a morning person" and "child pornographers are horrible people - they should be tried as adults"), but the format of the show was that it was basically a talk show where he would have comedians come on as guests and he would talk to them about...well, like a talk show, like an interview you'd see on conan or something. and unfortunately they just weren't very good and the dynamic between them and katz was also just not really there.

there was also a musical guest who wasn't very funny. he did one song that was kind of cute, about thanking his ex-girlfriends for breaking his heart in the past so that he could eventually end up with the woman he loves now, but then he did another song which was just not funny at all, it was basically like "all religions should live in peace" and there weren't any jokes and we were kind of exchanging awkward glances. there was a part where he asked the audience to sing the chorus and nobody really did and then the song ended and it was all just kind of downhill from there

i'm assured that the shows are usually much better though so we're determined to go back sometime.

aww! look at the "we's"!



oh! also, I was going to say, I highly recommend waiting to do the sex. you should get down to business definitely, make out-wise, but I wouldn't worry about sticking it in just yet. It'd be one thing if you guys were making out on the first date, but you're kinda going slow and it's really nice to figure out how each other's bodies work before you get to the deed. It makes things way nicer for everyone when the deed finally comes around. (in my newly formed opinion).

[Bob]

oh yeah - one sort of close call at the show. at the beginning, katz was kind of fooling around with the audience and he asks one guy who was sitting near me "do you have a girlfriend?" and i was thinking "i am so glad he didn't talk to me, there could not have been a more awkward time to answer that question in front of a comedian"

[Adam]

(y)(y)(y)(y)

[ms.peachy]

yay Bob. Sounds like everything's great. (y)

[Praying Mantis]

Way to go Bob!!!!

[NicRN77]

Yahoo!!! So happy to hear things went well!!

I've never been to Improv Boston. I highly recommend Improv Asylum in the North End.

And Indian food on a date...you are a brave soul, Bob.

[Guy Incognito]

oh yeah - one sort of close call at the show. at the beginning, katz was kind of fooling around with the audience and he asks one guy who was sitting near me "do you have a girlfriend?" and i was thinking "i am so glad he didn't talk to me, there could not have been a more awkward time to answer that question in front of a comedian"

glad it went well - excellent work.

i did nearly say yesterday not to sit too near front in case comedian starts having a go and making jokes about you being a couple but i didnt want you to worry about that.

[HEIRESS]

yay Bob!
the next date will probably include a 3 hour make-out session. positive.

[hpdrifter]

Yay! So happy for you, buddy.

[mickill]

YEEAHH AWWWRRRIGHT BOB! WE WON!!!! I KNEW WE WOULD!! GO YANKEES!!!

[Bob]

alright so here's another question that i'm having a difficult time phrasing - how often do people usually see each other at this point? we live pretty close to each other (a few subway stops away) so distance isn't a thing and our schedules are both pretty flexible (i have no job and she works whenever she feels like it) so timing isn't really a thing either, i'm just wondering how much is too much? like we went out yesterday (wednesday), i was thinking of asking her out again for saturday - too soon? just fine?

i'm guessing that's a hard question to answer in the abstract because it depends on the people but i dunno i was wondering if there was some rule that everyone knows that i don't know about. i don't wanna, you know, smother her or anything but apparently she likes me so maybe she's fine with it, i don't really know what i'm doing here honestly i'm kind of surprised i've made it this far

[Helvete]

That's a good question, I think if you're still at the dating stage and nothing is 'official' yet, then seeing her a couple of times a week is okay. If you actually are official and in a relationship, then from my experience they want to see you every damn second they can! Now I'm not sure if that's what all girls are like, but that's what I have found.

At what stage you call it a relationship I don't actually know!

[jabumbo]

how are you two going to pay for the children?

[na§tee]

twice a week is perfect. once on a weekday, once on the weekend.

i try to act all aloof and 'eh i guess i'll see you.. meh, ..whenever' when actually i'm like 'oh my god oh my god i'll see you tomorrow i want to lick your fucking face'.

women.

[Guy Incognito]

alright so here's another question that i'm having a difficult time phrasing - how often do people usually see each other at this point? we live pretty close to each other (a few subway stops away) so distance isn't a thing and our schedules are both pretty flexible (i have no job and she works whenever she feels like it) so timing isn't really a thing either, i'm just wondering how much is too much? like we went out yesterday (wednesday), i was thinking of asking her out again for saturday - too soon? just fine?

i'm guessing that's a hard question to answer in the abstract because it depends on the people but i dunno i was wondering if there was some rule that everyone knows that i don't know about. i don't wanna, you know, smother her or anything but apparently she likes me so maybe she's fine with it, i don't really know what i'm doing here honestly i'm kind of surprised i've made it this far

asking her out twice in a week is not smothering. smothering is bomarding her with texts or calls. ask her out for cliffs sake, she's prolly hoping you do.
and , i'm not the first to say this in this thread have a bit more confidence dude, stop saying things like apparently she likes me and that your surprised. big yourself up a bit, believe in yourself more man. its going well and you are obviously doing a lot right.

[Bob]

saturday it is then

[hpdrifter]

Yeah, if there was a good kiss last time chances are she's going to want to see you again soon. I think Wed-Saturday is probably appropriate.

[rirv]

Yeah, whatever you do don't keep on contacting her every second. I don't think girls like it when you keep texting them saying shit like "Thinking of you.." "What are you doing?" "Miss youuuuuuuuuuuuuuu xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx" etc. etc. It's all about not coming across as TOO keen, just interested and entertained, but independent.

[Echewta]

Rirv, just wanted to say hi and that I'm thinking about you.

[rirv]

Hi, Echewta. How come you didn't text back to me? I texted you about 10 minutes ago and I haven't heard anything. Are you OK? Are you mad at me? Miss you xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Echewta]

Wut?>? I dnt no what u r talking about. Erything is kOOl :) Fone has been acting up & stuff. XoXoX

[rirv]

Ok kewl. Cant wate 2CU soon.

[Bob]

sometimes i love this place

[rirv]

sometimes i love this place
But then at other times, such as these, you wish you never logged in.

[Echewta]

http://www.hulu.com/watch/70172/the-little-rascals-collection-his-rascals-in-schools-out#s-p1-so-i0

[Adam]

I had a girlfriend like that once. I had to change my mobile phone tariff to keep up - then she fucked some guy on his honeymoon in Dubai so I got out of that one without too much text explaining (y)

I like to text and email (hate calls) but I think if you are ever sending more than 4 texts a day to the same person, step back and see if there a better way.

[Echewta]

RIRV U BIOTCH!#* U said U wer 2 tyrd 2go out last nite. Tina eyeballd U with that HORE Ben at Bucky's Crab Broil. He tarded! Why u all lyn?

[jabumbo]

survey says: 20% of males end texts to male friends with "hugs and kisses"

[Helvete]

I had sex yesterday, shit was cash.

[rirv]

RIRV U BIOTCH!#* U said U wer 2 tyrd 2go out last nite. Tina eyeballd U with that HORE Ben at Bucky's Crab Broil. He tarded! Why u all lyn?

Don't be a Bug-a-boo (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3pkiUpHaL8c).